Burn for Me

by Lea Coll

  “You don’t know as much as you think you do.” Then so softly, I almost didn’t hear him, “I could never work for my dad.”

  As Logan walked away, I heard my name called by a man I recognized from Logan’s interview standing by the receptionist’s desk.

  He held out his hand to shake mine with a firm grip, a Rolex on his wrist, and shiny gold cufflinks peeking out from his navy blue pinstripe suit jacket. “Richard Gunner. Nice to meet you.” I got the impression he’d do well in front of a jury; he was confident and put together.

  “Nice to meet you as well.” I couldn’t help but notice the expensive drape of his suit and his designer shoes. I felt a little shabby in my Ann Taylor suit and blue silk ruffled blouse.

  “Want to walk down to the coffee shop and get some coffee?”

  “Um …” I said, looking around in confusion. Where was the panel of attorneys who’d interviewed Logan? “I’m here to interview for the associate position.”

  “I know. I thought you might like some coffee. I’m buying,” he said with a smile.

  “Okay,” I said slowly, a little confused by the casual turn this interview had taken as I followed him out of the office and down a few blocks to the coffee shop.

  I was not prepared for this and desperately wanted to fill the silence. “So, have you worked at Gunner long?”

  “I’m the founding partner.”

  I flushed with embarrassment. Of course he was. His last name was Gunner. I’d prepped questions about my experience and education. I’d researched the firm and I knew he was one of the founding partners, but I was a little thrown by the fact that Richard offered to take me for coffee before the interview.

  When we reached the coffee shop, he opened the door and I followed him in. I’d expect a man to open the door for a woman, but I got the impression he expected people to hold doors for him, not the other way around. I quickly scanned the coffee shop but it was fairly deserted, so I didn’t need to worry about running into anyone I knew.

  “You want coffee? You don’t want one of those latte’s do you?”

  “A tall coffee is fine.” It was funny how expensive his clothes were, yet worried about the price of coffee.

  He ordered and paid for us.

  “Have a seat.” He placed our coffees on the table.

  “Is this part of the interview?” I asked, still uncertain, taking a seat and holding the warm cup in my hand.

  “No. The partners like to interview applicants together, but they wanted a break before yours. I offered to entertain you.” He glanced down at my hand wrapped around the coffee cup. “Are you married?”

  Was he hitting on me? If so, I needed to be careful how I handled this, and I wanted to bring us back to the reason we were here. “How is that relevant to the interview, Mr. Gunner?”

  “I’m trying to get to know you.” His tone was casual, but his eyes narrowed on mine.

  If he wasn’t hitting on me, then was this related to the job? My mind raced with everything we’d learned in law school. It was not proper to ask an applicant if he or she was married, but was this part of the interview? He said it wasn’t and we were sitting in a coffee shop. I shifted in my chair, uncomfortable that I left the office with him, especially if he was hitting on me. Had he asked Logan if he was married?

  When I remained silent, Richard continued, “I need to ensure you’re available to work the required billable hours at the firm. We require associates to bill one-hundred and eighty hours a month. You’ll find that you will have very little time for any outside activities, hobbies, or relationships.”

  Hard work and long hours didn’t scare me. Every new attorney knew billable hours were a necessary evil if you wanted to make partner. “I can assure you, Mr. Gunner, I’m a hard worker. I routinely work late, take work home, and work on the weekends. I do whatever it takes to get the job done. My boss wrote a letter to that effect and my colleagues would all agree.”

  His face relaxed and he stood up. “Let’s see if the others are ready.”

  Tension eased from my body now that this personal one on one was over. I’d prepared for the interview panel. My mind raced as we walked back to the office. What had I gotten myself into? Had he taken me to the coffee shop so he could legally ask me if I was married? Was this firm sexist in its hiring practices? If so, Logan would have an advantage being a man and I’d need to think about whether this firm would be a good fit for me.

  I followed him into the conference room where two men in their fifties sat waiting, and—I was happy to see—one woman in her forties. She sat across from me with my resume in front of them. Adrenaline rushed through my veins.

  They introduced themselves as Don Thompson and Charles Anderson the other two founding partners and the newest partner, Jillian Ford. Richard took a seat next to them and said, “Let’s get started, shall we?” The others nodded and Charles asked the first question, why I’d chosen to work at the public defender’s office.

  For the next thirty minutes, they took turns questioning me on my education, experience, and prior cases. I did the best I could and I felt good about my chances. I shook their hands, thanking them for their time, and let out a breath once I was in the waiting room.

  “Sadie Cole?” the receptionist asked as a petite woman with long wavy brown hair, blue eyes, and tan skin stood, wiping her hands on her suit pants before she turned to grab her briefcase and sling it over her shoulder. I watched as Richard approached her with his hand outstretched. Would he take her to a coffee shop to ask if she was married?

  I smiled at the receptionist and wished her a good day as I headed out. When I opened the door to leave, I turned to see Richard ushering Sadie into the conference room.

  Why was I singled out? Was it because the attorneys needed a break like Richard said? I wasn’t sure what to think, but I was so ready for girls’ night.

  I FELT LIGHTER THAT NIGHT at our table outside Annie’s Wine Bar. Whether I got the job or not, I’d done my best. The warm wind blew my hair as I placed a few pieces of cheese and grapes from the charcuterie board onto my appetizer plate.

  “Why do you hate Logan again?” Our most outgoing friend, Stella, asked. “That’s the emotion you feel—hate?”

  “I don’t know about hate; we push each other to do better.” Is that what it looked like to my friends? That Logan and I hated each other? I swear I saw heat in his eyes when he looked at me sometimes but he had so many women throwing themselves at him. Maybe I was just a challenge for him—nothing else.

  “You guys have been at each other’s throats as long as I’ve lived here.” Emma took a sip of her wine as she kept her eyes trained on mine.

  I leaned back in my chair, crossing my arms as I thought back to my first encounter with Logan. It was my first day as a public defender and he was confident, charming, and sexy in his suit. When he focused that megawatt smile and twinkling blue eyes on me, I felt like the only woman in the world. He’d invited me out that night and a thrill had shot through me—my first real attorney job and a handsome man asked me out. It was the confidence booster I’d needed months after my ex, Greg, dumped me.

  When I arrived at the Fish House later that night expecting to get to know him better over drinks, I was surprised to see that Logan had invited several colleagues from both the state’s attorney and public defender’s office. My stomach dropped when I saw a woman with her hand on his chest as she whispered in his ear. When he got up to go to the bar, she stopped him, kissing him on the mouth. I stood frozen in the same spot. He hadn’t seen me yet so I left before he did. I’d clearly misunderstood his invitation.

  I thought we had a connection and it was the start of something between us. But whenever I saw him out, he had a different woman with him. He was flirtatious and loved having a good time. There was nothing wrong with that, but I wasn’t interested in being one of his women. I knew my worth.

  I’d written him off as someone who wasn’t for me. We were attracted to each other, but
he wasn’t my type. “It’s nothing he did. Some people just don’t get along.”

  “There has to be more to it than that,” Emma said.

  “He annoys me.” I wouldn’t fall for his act again. I kept it professional—ignoring his winks, flirtatious smiles, and ridiculous pet names.

  “I’ve seen the way you guys interact. You’re the only one who doesn’t fall for his charm and it drives him crazy,” Stella said.

  But I had. “Maybe.” I wouldn’t be giving that man a second chance.

  “So, how was your interview?” Emma asked. “I’m dying to know.”

  I sighed, relieved they’d changed the subject from Logan to the interview. “It was good.”

  “Why do I feel like there’s a but coming?” Emma asked.

  “It was really weird at first. The firm interviewed Logan in front of a panel of attorneys. But when it was my turn, the managing partner took me to a coffee shop and asked if I was married.”

  “He’s not allowed to ask that, is he?” Stella asked.

  “No, he’s not, but he asked me in a public place and specifically said it wasn’t part of the interview. He said he wanted to make sure I was aware of the required billable hours and that I wouldn’t have any time for outside hobbies or relationships.”

  “That’s so sketchy,” Stella said.

  “Did he ask Logan that question?” Emma asked.

  “I don’t know. It didn’t cross any lines, but it felt wrong.” Not only did it feel wrong, but the idea of not having any outside release from work bothered me. Richard specifically mentioned no time for relationships. Did he mean friendships, boyfriends, and family? It seemed a little extreme.

  “But don’t you wonder what else is going on at this firm if he thinks it’s okay to ask if you’re married?” Emma asked.

  “I’m not sure what to think. The rest of the interview was normal.” I took a sip of my wine. “I’d like to move forward. I’ve been at the public defender’s office for a few years now and it’s time to branch out and get more experience.” To lighten the mood, I said to Stella, “It would be nice to say I’m in private practice at our high school reunion.”

  “Oh, that’s right. You were voted Most Likely to Succeed.” Stella sat straighter, gesturing with her hands. “The most talked about issue at a high school reunion is what the person named most likely to succeed did with their life. People want that person to fail; it makes them feel better about themselves.” When we stared at her in stunned silence, she said, “I read it online somewhere—Huffington Post or something.”

  “Would that be a good fit for the Stella Says column?” Emma asked. “You could ask how people feel about high school reunions.”

  “Yeah, that’s a good idea,” Stella said.

  Stella’s words acted as a weight on my chest, making it difficult to take deep breaths. My mother’s expectations weighed heavily on me and I still wanted her approval. The fact that people would judge me at the reunion added another level of pressure—one I hadn’t thought of before.

  WALKING THROUGH THE EMPTY HALLWAY of the courthouse early the next morning, Logan stood outside the courtroom waiting for the bailiff to unlock it. He stood with one leg bent, foot resting on the wall behind him, a stack of files tucked under his arm, eyes on me.

  “Are you going to congratulate me?” Logan asked as I approached.

  “For what?” I searched his face, which held a cocky grin and his blue eyes sparkled.

  “I got the job.”

  “You did?” I felt my breath whoosh out of my body at the disappointment. I took a deep breath, Logan’s cocky grin tried every bit of patience I possessed. “Congratulations. You deserve it.” And he did.

  “I’m sure your rejection letter is in the mail.”

  I was gracious, but he was pushing it with his comments. “If you’re not going to work for your dad, maybe I will.” I smiled for the first time, knowing this would take that smirk off his face.

  He pushed off the wall, his face tightening, as he stalked closer to me. “What?”

  I’d meant to keep the mood light, but my words had ignited something in him. He stepped so close I had to look up to keep my eyes on his face and a prickle of awareness shot through me. Swallowing hard, I said, “Maybe I’ll work for your dad. You know, since you don’t want to and you already have a job.”

  “He’s not hiring.” His eyes searched my face to determine whether I was serious.

  At least Logan’s smirk was gone. “Are you sure about that? I thought he was holding out for you to take over the firm. If that’s not going to happen, maybe I should inquire?” I tilted my head to the side as I studied him. His stance was rigid and his jaw tight.

  “You don’t want to work for him,” he finally said.

  “Why?” My voice softened. In all the time I’d known Logan, he had been light-hearted and fun. This was the first real emotion I’d seen from him and I wanted to know more. “Why shouldn’t I work for your dad, Logan?” A current sizzled between us and his eyes darkened.

  He leaned down until his mouth was by my ear. “You’re playing with fire.”

  The feel of his breath across the shell of my ear made me shiver. I wasn’t sure if he meant because I’d asked about his dad or our sudden proximity. Did he feel the pull between us? Being this close to him, feeling the warmth of his body, I wanted to play with fire. I leaned closer to his body and imagined his hand moving higher to my neck, cupping my head as he tilted me the way he wanted—

  “Hey! I hear congratulations are in order. Sawyer said you got the job,” Luke said as I guiltily jumped back from Logan. How much had Luke seen? We’d been much too close to be having a professional conversation.

  Sawyer, a professor at Washington College, was Luke’s younger brother and close friends with Logan.

  “That’s right,” Logan said, clearing his throat.

  I took a few deep breaths to calm my racing heart. Now that the moment was broken I was annoyed I’d allowed him to draw me in like that. I didn’t want him to know how he affected me.

  “I’ve gotta find my clients. Congrats again,” I said as I backed away from them. As much as I tried to deny it, I was attracted to him. But I didn’t want to make the mistake of falling for his charm. I’d been wrong about my ex-boyfriend. I thought he was in it for the long haul—marriage and kids—but then he’d broken it off, saying I wasn’t wife material. I’d only ever seen Logan go from woman to woman; he wasn’t serious about any of them. So he was definitely not husband material, if that’s what I was looking for. And maybe I was, if I was being honest with myself.

  “Hey, you okay?” Emma asked as I approached the courtroom doors. “I heard Logan got the job.”

  “Yeah, I heard it directly from the source.” Now that I was with a friend, I let the disappointment wash over me and my shoulders slumped.

  She hugged me. “I’m sorry you didn’t get it and you had to hear it from Logan.” She pulled away. “Was he gloating?”

  Of course he was. “It’s his favorite pastime.”

  I felt my phone buzz and answered, “Ashley Cook.” I waved to Emma and moved to a quiet corner of the hallway.

  “This is Richard Gunner from Gunner, Thompson & Anderson. I wanted to extend an offer to you for the associate position. I emailed you the details: salary, health insurance, etc. You can call the office manager if you have any questions.”

  Elation shot through me, but at the same time, I was confused. “I thought you offered the job to someone else?”

  “We have a few positions open. So, yes, we have made several offers today. At the end of the probationary period, we’ll award a partner-track position to one of you. But I have to be honest with you before you accept the offer, only two of you will stay.”

  An initial probationary period existed at the public defender’s office in order to weed out the worst hires, but what concerned me the most was I’d be in direct competition with Logan. I had to remember when I won the position
, I’d finally be successful.

  “Congratulations. Take a look at the information I sent you. If you can let me know your response by the end of the week, that would be great.”

  “Okay, thanks.” I couldn’t wait to get off the phone and tell someone the good news. I watched Luke and Logan walk into the courtroom and the desire was strong to shout, “Congratulations are in order, for me!” But as soon as I thought of it, I thought better of it. We’d be working together instead of on opposite sides of the courtroom. There’d be more encounters like this morning. The thought made me nervous and excited all at once.

  OUR FRIENDS FREQUENTLY GATHERED AT The Pub; the main hangout in our small town. Our group of friends recently expanded to include Emma who’d moved here from Baltimore, and Logan, who was friends with Sawyer. Tonight, we were celebrating the job offers.

  “We had to celebrate,” Stella said, raising her beer mug to the group at The Pub. “Logan and Ashley—may you not kill each other.”

  “Ha, ha, ha,” I said. The only thing that would make this moment sweeter was if we were celebrating only my new job offer, not Logan’s. My elation was hampered by the uncertainty of the firm hiring multiple attorneys and wondering what it would be like working with Logan.

  “No, seriously,” Stella paused, holding up her finger and tried again, “may you not kill each other.” Then she erupted into giggles.

  I shook my head because our friends had frequently witnessed us arguing. I liked to excuse it by saying that’s what attorneys do, but I suspected something else burned between us and it wasn’t animosity. “I’m so glad,” I gestured at Logan, “we can be the butt of your jokes.” Stella was loud; she never meant any harm. She was the jokester in our group and she almost always had a smile on her face.

  “Someone has to be,” Stella said.

  Luke thumped the table. “I’ll do the toast since Stella is incapable. Congratulations, Logan and Ashley, on your new jobs. May you both be successful.”