by Louise Guy
‘Of course we should,’ Sean answered. ‘You don’t turn sixty every day, and it’ll be a nice break for you and dad. There are some lovely wineries up there.’
His mother clapped her hands. ‘I can see it now, sitting in front of an open fire, glass of red, nice music. Heaven!’
Leah smiled at Sean. He’d certainly done a good job with the presents.
‘Now,’ June said to the girls. ‘How about you two go out the back and see what Pops has set up for you to play. Take a pen and paper from the kitchen and use it to make a score sheet. You can have a proper battle.’
The twins giggled and made their way through to the kitchen and out of the French doors to the backyard.
‘What can we do to help, June?’ Leah asked.
June’s eyes widened at her offer but she was quick to compose herself. ‘How about you head out and help your father, Sean, and Eve, you come with me?’ She winked. ‘I think I’ll need help opening that bottle of champagne.’
Leah followed her into the recently renovated kitchen, glad to be separated from Sean. She found it hard to even look at him at the moment.
‘So how are you, love?’ Eve’s mother-in-law asked.
She tried to smile, but it wouldn’t come. She was suddenly so overwhelmed she burst into tears.
The older woman moved towards her immediately and embraced her. ‘Oh, you poor girl. What an awful time you’ve had. I can only imagine what you’ve been going through.’
Leah took the tissue June offered her and wiped her tears. It was all too much. Losing Eve, trying to fit into her life. The trust the two little girls now had in her. The new baby. Sean. Her parents’ pain. Jackie’s.
How she’d kept it together until now she had no idea.
It took a few minutes, but she managed to compose herself. ‘Sorry. I’m not sure where that came from. I think it’s been so busy since the accident I haven’t had enough time to grieve.’
‘You need a break,’ June said. She looked out of the window to where Sean was opening a beer and passing it to his father. The older man was turning sausages on the barbecue. ‘Perhaps Abe and I could have the twins for a few days? Let you and Sean have some time to yourselves. Get away somewhere.’
Leah’s face must’ve given away her thoughts on that kind suggestion.
‘Or perhaps you need a few days to yourself?’ Sean’s mother added.
‘Perhaps,’ she said. She leant forward and hugged June again. ‘I appreciate the offer and will definitely let you know if I want to take you up on it.’ She stood. ‘I might use the bathroom and freshen up before we have lunch.’
‘Of course, dear. You take your time. I’ll finish preparing the salads and we’ll join the others.’
Only a few sausages and some salad remained on the table when they’d all finished eating. Sean leaned back in his chair, his hands wrapped around his empty beer bottle as he watched the twins return to their skittles duel and Leah stand, ready to help June clear the table.
‘You sit down,’ the older woman insisted. ‘Chat with Sean and Abe. I can do this.’
‘Absolutely not. You should be the one sitting down. It’s your birthday.’
‘Not until tomorrow, and this lunch wasn’t supposed to be for my birthday.’
‘No arguments,’ Leah said. ‘I’m helping, at least.’
‘Fine, but let’s just put it all inside and go and join the girls. They look like they’re having so much fun. We’ll clean up properly later. The boys can stay here and chat. Get Sean another beer, Abe. He looks like he could use one.’
‘She’s right, you know,’ Sean’s dad said, while Eve and June took the plates and made their way inside. ‘You do look like you could use one. Everything okay?’
Sean sighed. ‘Yes. No. Sort of.’ He ran his hand through his hair. ‘Don’t know really, Dad. Not sure if I want to talk about it.’
They sat in silence, both nursing their beers, their eyes on the twins.
June and Eve reappeared and joined in with the game of skittles.
The shrieks from the twins grew louder when his mum managed to knock down all ten pins at once.
Harriet frowned in concentration as she stood the pins back up, took the ball in hand and lined up ready for her turn.
‘Looks like it’s getting serious,’ his father said.
Sean smiled. ‘After Mum’s strike, Harry will be dying to do the same.’
The little girl released the ball, fists clenched while she waited. Nine of the pins fell down immediately. The tenth teetered to and fro before finally crashing to the ground.
The screams this time were twice as loud as they had been for June, with both Eve and his mum joining in.
Eve swept Harriet up in a huge hug and spun her around. The two of them laughed and cheered.
‘Eve seems different,’ his dad commented. ‘Much more relaxed around the kids than usual.’
Sean nodded. ‘The accident shook her up, a lot. In some ways she’s been very different since then.’
‘Really? What’s she been doing?’
‘Choosing to spend time with the girls and me. Cutting back her work. Baking with them, letting them have treats. Not yelling at them like she used to. She’s been doing half of the jobs Kate was doing before. Kate’s only coming two days a week, not five. Realistically, we probably don’t even need her anymore.’
‘You don’t look very happy about it. Did you prefer the other version of Eve?’ His father asked.
He didn’t respond immediately.
‘Or is it Kate? Are you disappointed she might not be around so much?’
Sean looked up at his father, reading the real question in his eyes very quickly. He almost laughed out loud. ‘What, me and Kate? No Dad, that’s definitely not what the problem is. Kate’s been a great nanny, and that’s all.’
‘Good to hear, son.’ He took another swig of his beer. ‘So, what is it then? You have a new and improved wife, and you look like you can’t stand her.’
‘It’s complicated.’
‘It’s usually not all that complicated. It’s what we make of a problem that complicates things.’
He gave a half smile. ‘Let me assure you, Dad, this is complicated and nothing I’ve done has contributed to it.’
His father leant back in his chair, his eyes fixed on the lively game of skittles on the other side of the garden. ‘So, Eve’s messed up.’
‘Understatement. She’s pregnant.’ Why had he added that information? He hadn’t planned to talk to his father about what was really going on.
‘That’s great news, surely? Or is it twins and you can’t bear the thought of two screaming babies at once again?’
‘It’s too early to tell. She hasn’t had an ultrasound yet.’
‘So? How’s she messed up then? Hate to tell you, but it takes two to make a baby. I’d say you might’ve contributed.’
Sean sighed again. ‘I’m more than aware of that, Dad. I wasn’t one of the two.’
‘Oh.’
They sat in renewed silence.
Sean stole a look at his father. Oh. That was all he had to say.
His dad appeared to be deep in thought.
Eventually he spoke. ‘You sure it isn’t yours?’
‘Definitely. Things hadn’t been good between us before the accident. To make things worse, she tried to pass it off as mine.’
‘Even though she knew it couldn’t be?’
‘Her memory from before the accident is a bit hazy. She doesn’t seem to remember how bad things were between us. That I’d been sleeping in the other room. She doesn’t even remember having an affair.’
‘But she definitely did?’
‘Her own mum and best friend seem to know a lot more about it than she does. She’s also pregnant. She definitely had an affair.’
‘But it’s stopped now.’
Sean nodded.
‘That’s one thing, at least. So what does it mean for the two of you?’
‘It’s over. I haven’t worked out how we move forward from here. We have the girls to think of.’
‘Of course.’
‘What?’ Sean could see his father had more to say but was choosing to keep silent.
The older man met his eye. ‘Life is difficult, son. It’s how we handle what’s thrown at us that makes us men.’
‘What? You think I should forgive her and raise some other guy’s kid?’
‘I didn’t say that. But things aren’t always black and white.’
‘This is. She had an affair and got pregnant. The affair itself was enough to end the marriage. Let alone the pregnancy.’
‘You’ve never thought about being with someone else before?’
Heat rushed to Sean’s cheeks. ‘Put it this way, I’ve never acted on it.’
‘And there’s no way you’d be willing to take things slowly. In light of the accident, and how much she’s changed? See if it’s worth giving her a second chance?’
Sean watched as Eve drew Ava to her in an embrace and then started tickling her. Ava giggled and tried to escape his wife’s clutches.
‘Let me tell you a story,’ his dad said before he could reply. ‘A story I don’t want you repeating. Okay?’
‘Okay.’
His father stared at his beer bottle. ‘Your mother is the most amazing woman I’ve ever met.’
He smiled. ‘I know, Dad. You two have a great marriage, you’re lucky.’
His father met Sean’s eyes. ‘No thanks to me. When you were about two, I was travelling a lot for work and if I’m honest, I was glad to be. Babies and toddlers weren’t really my thing. Your mum was terrific with you but I found the crying and nap times and constant attention you seemed to need really wearing. I also got a bit jealous your mum’s time was now so devoted to you. You were her priority, not me. So, I found comfort elsewhere.’
‘What?’ He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. His parent’s marriage was like an institution. Something he’d respected and looked up to all through his life. It was the thing that had made him want to get married. To have the same bond with someone. To enjoy a family, to grow old together. Of course, Eve hadn’t exactly fulfilled the role of wife and mother that he’d imagined.
‘It went on for about a year. I was travelling to Sydney most weeks, and she’d come and stay with me.’
‘Did Mum find out?’
His father nodded. ‘Eventually. The other woman, Denise, tracked me down in Melbourne. I came home to find her having a cup of tea with your mum at the kitchen table. I’d been lying to both of them. Denise didn’t know I was married.’
‘Oh shit,’ Sean said.
‘You can say that again. I’ll tell you, your mother was remarkable. While Denise was in the house, she stayed calm. Practically apologised on my behalf. Offered her a meal, which thankfully, she didn’t stay for. It was the most excruciating experience, mainly because of the way your mum behaved. She even gave me time to speak to Denise on my own before Denise left.’
‘What did you tell Denise?’
‘What could I tell her? I apologised. Told her how much I’d enjoyed our time together and I was sorry I’d led her on. She slapped me across the face and left.’
‘And Mum?’
‘Your mum got out the whisky, placed the bottle and two glasses on the table and made me sit down and talk to her. She made me tell her exactly why I’d felt the need to stray. It took quite a few drinks, but we ended up having the discussion we should’ve had before I went looking elsewhere. She had no idea how I’d felt about you and how the changes in our life, because of having a baby, had affected me. Turns out she was finding it hard too, particularly when I was gone half the time and not helping out much when I was around.’
‘What did you do? You obviously stayed together.’
‘Your mother offered me six months. She said she wasn’t going to stay in the marriage if I was unfaithful again. She suggested we take on board everything the whisky had given us the guts to say and see if we could make the situation happy for all three of us.’
‘And you did?’
‘We did. We also had whisky night every Friday night. We never drank so much as we did that first night, but a couple of drinks each helped us to be honest. Really share our feelings. After a while we didn’t need the whisky anymore. We seemed to be able to communicate a lot better.’
‘And you didn’t stray again?’
‘No. Never had the need. If anything, our marriage was stronger because of what’d happened. Mind you, only because of the way your mother made us handle it. Like I said, she’s an incredible woman.’
Sean looked across to his mother, who caught his gaze and smiled back. ‘Okay, reverse the situation then. Let’s say Mum was the one who’d had the affair and came back pregnant. Would you have stayed?’
‘Probably not.’ His father didn’t hesitate.
He laughed. ‘So why tell me this whole story then?’
‘I wouldn’t have stayed, because there’s no way I would’ve sat down and had a conversation with your mother. My pride wouldn’t have allowed me to find out why she’d had an affair. I would’ve walked out and that would’ve been it. I’m telling you the story so, hopefully you don’t act like me. You consider acting like your mother. I’m not saying it’ll be easy. I’m not guaranteeing it’ll fix anything. Raising someone else’s kid is a whole other thing. But you and Eve have been together for a long time. You have a history. You have two beautiful girls. It’s a lot to throw away.’
It was a lot to throw away.
‘It would’ve been an easier decision before the accident,’ Sean said. ‘We’d grown so far apart. I’m not sure if that was because Eve was having an affair or if there were other reasons too.’
‘But now?’
‘She’s so different. It’s like I have the wife I’ve always wanted. Look at her with the girls. She’s so natural with them. So loving and kind. As awful as this sounds, I think I have Leah dying to thank for this dramatic change. Some of the qualities I’m seeing in Eve now are more like her sister. I didn’t know Leah all that well, but there was an underlying kindness in her. It’s like part of Leah’s soul merged with Eve.’
‘Tragedy changes people. Eve went through a terrible trauma seeing her sister die. A twin sister, too. The connection between twins, as you know, is so strong. Eve survived the accident and has come out the other side a better person. Sure, the pregnancy creates an issue you’d prefer not to deal with, but it’s not the end of the world. You need to take the pregnancy out of the equation if you can. Could you forgive Eve for the affair based on the fact that she ended it, doesn’t seem to remember it, and has changed so much?’
Sean closed his eyes. If only he couldn’t remember before the accident. That would make things a lot easier. ‘I don’t know, Dad, I really don’t know.’
‘Whatever you decide, son, your mother and I will be here to support you. But don’t rush into any decisions. Push your pride aside if you can and try to live in the present. Don’t look back. Look at what you have right now with Eve and the girls and go from there.’
Sean placed his empty bottle on the table and stood. ‘I’ll get us another beer. And, Dad, thanks.’
Sean crossed the lawn and headed towards the kitchen to get some more drinks.
Eve lined the ball up and rolled it with all her might at the skittles.
Much to the girls’ delight, all ten skittles went flying.
He smiled when the twins rushed to hug his wife.
She caught his eye, her smile hesitant as their gazes connected.
A flood of emotions swept through him. She was so beautiful, not only in looks, but since Leah’s death in her nature, too.
Did he have it in him to forgive her, to move on? Sean closed his eyes when no answer presented itself. He opened them again. ‘Great shot,’ he called before continuing on.
Leah had never been so pleased for Monday, and work, to roll around. Sean
had been a little nicer after they’d left June and Abe’s. She’d put it down to the excessive number of beers he’d drunk.
He’d certainly felt it that morning, crashing around the kitchen like a bear with a sore head. He’d grunted at her and disappeared out the door before the girls had surfaced.
She’d been relieved when his car backed out of the driveway and sped off down the street.
A hangover on top of his already foul mood wasn’t going to be good for any of them.
Leah had left the girls with Kate to take to school to ensure she’d be in the office well before the nine o’clock staff meeting. She had a lot of preparations to do for the week. One of the accounts she was managing was going to auction on Thursday and she needed to confirm two more open houses with the owners.
There was a knock on her door as she picked up the phone to make some calls.
It was Peter.
‘Got a minute?’
‘Of course. Everything okay?’
Peter smiled and sat in a chair opposite her. ‘It is with me. It’s you I’m worried about. Although you’re certainly looking a little more like yourself today which is a good sign.’
She gripped her hands together under the desk. Leah was only looking like herself, or the old Eve, because she’d agreed to have lunch with Nicola. She’d taken extra care that morning to look more the part of her sister. However, that wasn’t going to help her now. She’d known her poor work performance would catch up with her.
‘The thing is. I’m worried you’ve come back to work too early. Your memory issues are really affecting the quality of your work.’ Peter’s smile, kind and gentle, reached his eyes. ‘Don’t take this the wrong way, Eve. You’re brilliant at what you do. We both know that. But, I think right now you need to recover. Get your memory back. Come back when you know you’re back up at your best, or near it, at least.’
She swallowed. ‘Are you firing me?’
Concern flooded his face. ‘Of course not. You’re the best sales person we’ve ever had. I just think for the moment, it’d be best for everyone if you took some time off. I’m happy to match whatever holiday time you have owing with paid leave. Take a month. Take two if you need it.’
