Hot Mess: A Players Rockstar Romance (Players #1)

by Diamond, Jaine

  Danica drifted her hand down my neck, then wrapped her arm around me. Cuddling with me. Amber never really did that with me. At least, not when we were alone, unless, maybe, we were talking about Dylan.

  “When did you know it was over?” she asked me.

  I sighed. “I kissed him,” I said. Might as well just tell her everything, right? “He didn’t kiss me back.”

  “Ouch,” she said softly.

  “Yeah. He told me he couldn’t be with me like that. He told me what I already knew. I knew he was straight, knew we could never be together, but when Amber came along, for a little while, she made that feel possible. I think I’ll always be grateful to her for that in a weird way. You seriously want to hear all this shit?”

  “It’s fascinating,” Danica said, gazing up at me as she listened to me spill my guts.

  “You’re fascinating,” I said, staring right back at her.

  “Tell me what it was like, being with them.”

  Jesus. She really was brave.

  “Okay…” I tightened my arm around her. I didn’t like to think about it all that much. Thinking about the good times when we were together, the three of us, didn’t always make me happy. Sometimes it made me fucking depressed. But I was getting past that now, at least. “We had some amazing times together, the three of us. Like some of the best moments I’ve ever had. I guess… because I felt so close to Dylan. Like I was part of his life in this way I thought I’d never be. But he told me he wanted Amber to move in with him, wanted her to come on tour, and I knew I didn’t fit into that scenario anymore. He didn’t even have to say so. Dylan’s never cared that deeply about a girl before.”

  “Well… that’s kind of beautiful in its own way, isn’t it?” Danica asked, carefully. “Like, is there a part of you that’s happy for him, that he fell in love like that?”

  “Yeah. Of course. I didn’t even want to mess around in any of that once I knew how deep he’d fallen for her. Once I accepted it. I just had to get my ass out before I got more hurt.” I smoothed Danica’s hair back from her face. “How is it I can tell you all this shit and you don’t freak out?”

  “I don’t know,” she said. “I feel envious, hearing you talk about other people like that. Hearing how much you cared about them. Like I missed out on something, not being there? But I want to know. I want to know you, and if I don’t know this stuff, I’m missing a huge part of you. I’m missing a huge part of your heart. And how can you truly care about someone if you don’t know their whole heart?”

  I had nothing to say to that. But I definitely couldn’t remember anyone ever saying anything that amazing to me before. It made me want to kiss her all over.

  It made me want to fuck her. Just keep her in this bed all day and fuck her.

  So I rolled on top of her.

  “How much time have you got for me today?” I asked her. “Because I’ve got some ideas about how we can get to know each other better… Might take a little while, though.”

  “Until dinner time,” she said, not sounding all that happy about it. She sighed as I kissed my way down her throat, but not in pleasure. “It’s my birthday tomorrow. There’s a family dinner thing tonight.”

  “What? Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Um—”

  “Shit. I’ve got a dinner meeting tonight.” Summer and I were meeting with Brody, actually. Summer had put it together. Important dinner meeting. The one where we were gonna pitch Brody our supergroup idea and ask him if he’d consider managing us.

  Not a meeting I could blow off.

  “It’s okay, really.”

  “You should’ve told me,” I said. “I wouldn’t have made other plans. Shit, Danica. I really can’t cancel this.”

  “It’s not a big deal,” she said, “really. It’s Dani’s birthday too, and believe me, that is a way bigger deal. Anything that celebrates my sister’s mere existence is right up her alley.”

  “You’re not celebrating?”

  “Oh, there will be a celebration. We do the same family dinner thing every year. You can come tomorrow night, if you want to, when we have our real party. We’ll go to the bar, drink our faces off… way more your speed.” She gave me a little smile.

  Okay. Wasn’t sure if I liked that at all. Hell yes, I was coming tomorrow. But tonight?

  “Let me take you to dinner after my thing.”

  Her smile grew. “You’re gonna eat two dinners?”

  “For you, babe,” I said, kissing my way down her chest, “I’d eat all day.” I nibbled on her nipple, teased it with my teeth until her breath caught.

  “Um… yeah. I’m sure that’s how you keep that washboard stomach so tight… All the extra meals….” She ran her fingers down my back as I kissed the smooth skin between her breasts. “Really, I can’t, though. If I dip out of Aunt Margot’s thing early, I’ll be blacklisted. She’s hosting the dinner thing this year and she’s invited everyone who shares even a drop of blood with me.”

  I looked up at her. “And you don’t want me there?”

  “It’s not that,” she said quickly. “I’ll be grumpy anyway. Tomorrow will be more fun. All my friends will be there. I’d love it if you’d come.”

  “Why so grumpy on your birthday, Danica Vola? And don’t tell me it’s because your sister gets all the attention.”

  “No, we both get the attention. Incredibly equally. It’s nauseating. Everyone in my family gets us matchy-matchy gifts every year, like we’re still four years old or something.”

  I kissed my way down her soft stomach. “You really are a spoiled brat, aren’t you?”

  “I’m not spoiled.”

  “Complaining about your family having a dinner for you and lavishing gifts on you?”

  “I don’t like being the center of attention, and the gift lavishing makes me uncomfortable. I don’t need gifts.”

  “Ah, the truth comes out. You don’t like people doing things for you.”

  “Well… it’s just…”

  “I know, babe. You prefer doing things for other people.”

  “That would be a better gift,” she said. “It makes me happier. Honestly? I tried to do that for a couple of years, bring them all gifts on my birthday. It didn’t go over so well. I mean, they took the gifts. You’ve met my family.”

  I snickered.

  “But they were annoyed with me,” she said.

  “No doubt. Just look at it this way. Giving you gifts makes them feel good, which means you’ve done something nice for them.”

  “Huh. I never really thought of it that way…”

  “So let them lavish you,” I said. “Who knows? Might even feel good to be selfish for once, you know, if you can relax and just enjoy it…” Then I lowered my mouth between her legs and kissed her clit. “That feel good?”

  “Yeah… I feel like I should go down on you again, though. You’re always down there…”

  “I like being down here.”

  I did. Earlier this morning, when she’d given me that incredible blowjob, I’d gone down on her again to show my appreciation… right before I fucked her again.

  “Isn’t it your turn again, though?” she asked.

  “Just relax,” I said. “And enjoy.”

  She sighed. “Okay…”

  “Consider it your first birthday present.”

  “First?” She wriggled with discomfort as I licked her, fighting the pleasure. “Ashley, please don’t get me anything.”

  “Sure.”

  “Promise me.”

  “I promise.”

  “You promise what?” she pressed.

  “I promise not to get you anything.”

  “Why don’t I believe you?”

  “I dunno. Trust issues?”

  She groaned.

  “Just relax. And take your present like a big girl.”

  She giggled. Then I fluttered the steel ball in my tongue over her clit, and the laughter melted into moans.

  * * *

 
After I made Danica cry out my name enough times to satisfy my ego while I ate her out, I dragged her limp body into the shower again. She was all warm, contented jelly in my arms.

  This time, we didn’t fuck under the steaming water. Instead, I shampooed her hair for her and she practically purred in happiness. Apparently having her hair washed turned her on, because she started pawing at me, trying to get her hands on my dick.

  But I fended her off easily enough.

  Now that I knew it was practically her birthday, I planned to feed her a proper lunch before I fucked her again. If the birth of this girl wasn’t worth celebrating, I didn’t know what was.

  We got dressed and while I got lunch ready, she flitted around my kitchen like a little hummingbird in her sexy sundress. She set the island for us to eat, alternately humming and singing, kinda off-key but not terrible.

  “What’s that song?” I asked her. I kinda recognized it, but I wasn’t sure, the way she sang it. She was really getting into it, though.

  “It’s INXS, ‘Mystify,’” she informed me. “Fantastic song. Gorgeous lyrics.”

  “I couldn’t tell,” I told her, deadpan.

  “Nice!” She flicked a towel at me and fell apart laughing. “Are you critiquing my vocal talents??”

  “Or lack thereof…”

  “How dare you. On my almost-birthday! When I had the courage to sing in front of you, the amazing vocalist with the gorgeous, perfect voice…”

  “I don’t know about perfect…”

  “Perfect,” she said, and kissed me, squeezing my dick as she did it.

  “Jesus.” I adjusted my rapidly-hardening dick in my sweats. “You always this perky after you get some?”

  “I don’t know.” She looked genuinely stumped as she considered that. “I’ve never really gotten it so good before.”

  She’d started to slip away, but I grabbed her and yanked her to me, pressing my hard-on against her. “Keep saying shit like that, and I’m gonna keep it up.”

  “No pun intended…”

  I dug my hand into her hair and kissed her, long and deep. The blood was thrumming in my dick and my heart thudded in my chest… everything in me throbbing, hot against her, urging me to fuck her again—soon.

  “You keep being you,” I murmured against her lips, “I’m definitely gonna keep doing you.”

  “You keep being you,” she whispered, “I just might do you back.”

  We kissed some more. When we broke apart, she said, a little breathless, “I like you, Ashley.”

  “Yeah.” I cleared my throat. I forced myself off of her with a groan, intent on feeding her. “Sit your ass down. It’s your almost-birthday. I’m doing shit for you and you’re not doing anything for me today.”

  While Danica sat her ass down, I continued making our lunch—taco salad, because I made kickass taco salad.

  “So, was it really that bad?” she asked me, leaning on her hand as she sat at the island, watching me with a sweet smile on her face. “My singing? I’ll be sad if I can’t sing that song anymore. It’s kind of a staple.”

  “You’ve got a pretty voice,” I told her, honestly. “And your singing isn’t half-bad. You can keep doing it. I won’t complain.”

  “Really?”

  “I mean, it’s not half-good either.” I glanced over, and her jaw dropped, even as she smiled. “But I could give you some pointers, if you want.”

  “Are you serious? Singing lessons from Ashley Player?” She batted her eyelashes at me.

  “I mean, let’s be honest. No one’s ever gonna be throwing a recording contract at you. But if you want to sing in the shower and sound decent doing it, I can teach you. Or, you know, jam with me at a party when someone pulls out a guitar, and feel like you can hold your own, sing on-key and not run out of breath. I can coach you. Free of charge.”

  “Yes, I want that. That would be amazing.”

  “Cool,” I said. “Actually, I changed my mind. I’ll take sex as payment.”

  “Ah, the world’s oldest bartering system. If you can teach me to sing anything by Panic! At the Disco, I’ll give you any kind of sex you want.”

  “That may be a tall order. Let’s start with ‘American Pie’ or some shit, and see how you do.”

  She laughed. “Whatever you say. You’re the vocal expert.”

  “Hey, Danica.”

  “Yes, Ashley?”

  I cocked an eyebrow at her. “Any kind of sex?”

  “Yes. Any kind. Wait. Except butt sex. I think…”

  “So, butt sex it is.”

  She quirked a smile at me. “I don’t really understand butt sex. I mean… would you be imagining you were with a guy if you were doing me that way?”

  I snorted. “Yeah. For sure. If I was a repressed homophobe and that was the only way I could ever get butt sex.”

  She cocked her head at me.

  “Wow.” I turned to face her. “That came out wrong. Did I just give you the impression I’m fucking guys steady? Like right now?”

  “Kind of.”

  “It’s not like that.”

  “What’s it like?”

  “I’m with you right now. That’s all you need to know.” I went back to my cooking.

  If you asked me, that was all she needed to know. Was definitely never enough for Summer, though.

  Had I just turned this thing sour?

  I glanced at Danica. She was watching me, considering. She didn’t look upset, though.

  “What does that mean, Ashley?” she asked gently. “I don’t know you well enough to know what that means.”

  That was true, I supposed. But I felt my back going up on this topic.

  I’d really have to thank Summer for fucking me up in this area.

  I put the taco salad out on the island, handing her a serving spoon, and tried to put it as honestly as I could. “It means I like you and I don’t want to see anyone else right now. And I hope you feel the same way about me.”

  She looked at the giant salad. “I had no idea you were so skilled in the culinary department,” she said, not responding to that.

  “Guess we have a lot to learn about each other.” I slid onto a seat across from her as she started serving the food—onto my plate first. “You can just tell me you’re down for getting to know me,” I told her, “without touching anyone else’s dick on the side, and I’ll take you at your word.”

  “Touching anyone else’s dick?” She met my eyes. “Um, no… I’m not doing that.”

  “Cool. You strike me as an honest person. Goes hand-in-hand with the nice, right?”

  “I’m not seeing anyone else, Ashley. In my world, that’s what it means when I say I like you.”

  “Good. What time do you have to be home to get ready for your family dinner thing?”

  “About four or so?” She was filling her plate, and I waited for her to be ready to eat before I started, because I knew she’d do that for me.

  Who knew I’d pick up so many manners at the ripe age of thirty-one?

  “Perfect,” I said, as we dug in. “Then we have time to do whatever you want for a while first. I suggest going back to bed, but it’s up to you.”

  Her blue eyes sparkled at me. “I like that idea. But how about instead, you take me to your favorite place on this island?”

  “I can do that.”

  She sipped her pineapple juice innocently. “I just hope it’s not Dylan’s bed.”

  “Funny. I knew you had a sense of humor.”

  She cocked an eyebrow at me. “I’m here, aren’t I?”

  “Wow. She has a mean streak after all.”

  Danica smiled. “Maybe just a small one.”

  “Good,” I said. “I like it.”

  * * *

  After we ate, I took her up to the highest point on the island, where the bald rock face cut through the trees and gave the most epic views. We’d rode up on mountain bikes, taking the most gradual, forgiving trails through the woods, then parked at the bottom and hi
ked up the short walking trail worn into the rock.

  Now we stood overlooking the whole island and the waters beyond, with nothing above us but miles of clear blue sky.

  “This is gorgeous,” Danica exclaimed.

  “I know.”

  I turned to watch her. She was spinning in a slow circle, checking out the three-hundred-and-sixty-degree view of the island below us, mostly trees and a few rooftops scattered here and there… and the expanse of blue-gray waters, the bluish-green humps of the islands and the Coast Mountains on the mainland beyond.

  “It’s so serene,” she said. “Do you come here a lot?”

  “Whenever I can. It’s the best spot I’ve ever found to unplug. Do a lot of writing here, thinking, just plain relaxing. Soul searching. All that stuff. And it only took, what, ten minutes to get here from my house? Would’ve been faster if I was on my own.” I smirked at her, and she smiled back, rolling her eyes a little.

  “Sorry. I really didn’t see that giant root. It came out of nowhere.”

  She was referring to the tree root she’d hit with her bike at the wrong angle and taken a spill over, scraping her knee. We’d had to stop and I’d used the little kit I’d luckily thought to bring, just in case, to bandage her up. The scrape wasn’t deep, and luckily I was able to take care of it so we could keep going.

  “No worries,” I said. “I liked playing hero.”

  “I liked having you kiss my boo-boo. Tell the truth, though. Do you bring a first aid kit when you come up here with Dylan?”

  “No. But I’d feel a lot worse if you got scarred for life. Dylan can take care of his own boo-boos.”

  She smiled.

  “Anyway,” I told her, “I usually come up here alone. I rarely ever run into anyone else, either. This is part of Dylan’s property, and a huge part of the reason I bought the house. I wanted this property myself, but honestly, I couldn’t afford it. So it was kinda my fault Dylan bought this land.”