by Trisha Grace
Julian winced. “Wait. You wouldn’t know?”
Hayley cleared her throat. Why did I say that? Pretending she hadn't heard what Julian said, she set her Kindle aside, adjusted her pillow, then lay down with her back to Julian. “It’s late. Goodnight.”
“Hayley, are you saying you’ve never—”
“Boundaries,” she said. “I would rather not discuss my sex life with you.” Her non-existent sex life.
“I’m your husband.”
“Goodnight, Julian.”
Julian laughed. He wanted so much to turn Hayley over so he could kiss her and do much more … “Goodnight,” he said and switched off the bedroom lights using the application on his phone.
He shifted as he thought about what Colin had said to him and what Hayley had said back in the car. She’d meant it when she said she waited her whole life to be with him, and he’d destroyed the greatest gift he could ever have gotten. “Hayley.”
“I’m asleep.”
He laughed again. Then the last of his self-discipline evaporated. He leaned over and gave her a peck on the cheek.
Hayley turned to him and he took the opportunity to capture her lips. She gasped and her lips parted, allowing Julian to sweep his tongue into her. She tasted just like him, of the peppermint toothpaste they used.
Her tongue moved against his, and he pushed a hand under her and tugged her closer.
“You smell like flowers.” He kneaded her neck, then planted soft kisses down her jaws and neck when she tipped her head back.
She gasped and moaned when he gave her neck a light lick.
“Sweet. Just as I imagined.”
“Julian.”
“I love how you moan my name.”
His other hand found her waist, then skimmed up her ribcage before her firm grip on his wrist stopped him.
“Stop.”
He did. He froze and didn’t dare move a muscle.
“We can’t.” Hayley wriggled out from under him and jumped off the bed. “We can’t.”
He wanted to ask her why not, but he already knew what her answer was. She saw their marriage as only in name, and she wanted to keep him at arm’s length.
He wanted to assure her that he wouldn’t leave her and that he would protect her heart, but he realized he was pushing her to move too quickly. She wasn’t like the other women he’d been with. Women who were more than willing to jump into bed with him; women who thought that they could manipulate him into staying in a relationship if they were good enough in bed.
“I’m sorry,” he said and leaned back onto his side of the bed. “I got carried away.” He patted her side of the bed. “I promise I won’t try anything else.” Not tonight anyway.
She hesitated a moment before getting back in bed.
“You do smell and taste like flowers.”
She turned her back to him, but not before he noticed the slight curve of her lips. “Goodnight, Julian.”
Julian ran his hand through the ends of her hair. “Goodnight, my sweet Hayley.”
“I’m not one of those women.” She sat up in bed and clicked on the lamp attached to the wall above the nightstand, switching it on. “I don’t sleep around—”
“I didn’t say you did.”
“Then you can’t just kiss me and … and …”
“Seduce you?”
She crossed her arms. “Don’t do that again.”
“You saved yourself for me.”
She turned her face away and tucked her hair behind her ear. “I—”
Julian pressed a hand against his face. “Gosh, Hayley, you’re killing me. You have no idea how adorable you are right now.” He wanted to hold her in his arms and make her feel protected.
“I am not adorable.”
“You are.” He turned his back to her. “And your silk pajamas are …” He could so easily slip the thin straps off her shoulders. Stop. Don’t go down that road. “Let’s just go to sleep before I need to take another shower.”
Another click, and the room plunged into darkness.
“Hayley.”
“What.”
He laughed at her annoyed tone. “I really didn’t think of you as just another woman.” He grinned, though she hadn’t replied. “You’re too softhearted, you know. You can’t forgive people just because they apologize nicely.”
“I’m not softhearted. I’m still angry with you.”
“What can I do?” He flipped toward her just as she turned to him. Though the room was dark, the moonlight coming in through the window was enough for him to see that her eyes were open and looking at him. “Tell me.”
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Go ahead.”
“Do you find me attractive … in that manner?”
“As in, do I find you sexy?”
Her tongue darted out, and he couldn’t tear his gaze from its movement across her lips. “Yeah.”
He frowned. If it were another woman lying across the bed from him, he would have thought she was fishing for compliments. “Of course, Hayley.”
“But you were disgusted when you saw me in my lingerie.”
That memory felt as if it’d happened a lifetime ago. “I was frustrated. Frustrated that you looked so good, that my body reacted so violently to just the sight of you in your lingerie.” As his body was reacting now at the mere thought of her in her dark blue lingerie. “Do you have other pajamas? Maybe you could wear something more covered up.”
He stared back at her while she studied him, as if she was trying to figure out if he was lying. “Do you want me to prove how turned on I am?”
She flipped onto her other side. “Goodnight.”
“Oh, Hayley. You really are killing me.”
“Goodnight.”
“Goodnight,” he said, then turned on his back. Maybe he should go take that cold shower.
Chapter Sixteen
“THANK YOU, DESMOND,” Julian said after pulling himself onto the wheelchair. Before the car accident, his secretary had always hired a limousine and driver whenever he needed to be at an event. Otherwise, he preferred to be the one behind the wheel.
Last night, he’d gotten Desmond’s number from Doreen while Hayley was taking her bath. He couldn’t drive himself now, and it was the first time he had to arrange his own transport since getting home from the hospital.
Julian checked the time on his watch. 5 a.m. But the lights in the Casas’ place had been switched on.
“They get up very early to prepare breakfast,” Desmond said next to him. “They get up at three on weekdays.” He’d told Julian the same thing last night.
Julian had called Desmond and asked him to drive him over to the Casas. He’d wanted to do it at night, after Hayley had gone to bed. But Desmond said the Casas went to bed early and suggested he go in the morning instead.
“How do you know so much about them?”
“Miss Hayley tells me. And she always sleeps on the way home if she’s stayed over on the weekdays. I think she gets up to help them with the preparation.” Desmond put his hands on the wheelchair handle, but Julian shook his head.
“I got this.”
Desmond nodded. “I’ll wait in the car.”
Julian wheeled himself down the concrete footpath, staring at the wooden door ahead. The Casas wouldn’t be happy to see him. He just wasn’t sure how bad their reaction would be.
He came to the stop in front of the steps.
Oh, Hayley. Though he’d been in a wheelchair for months, he hadn’t been plagued by inaccessibility. Hospitals were built with wheelchairs in mind, and Hayley had taken care of everything back at home. He would have been infinitely more frustrated with his situation if she hadn’t outfitted the house with ramps. What would he have done without her?
Now, two short steps were all it took to stump him.
Julian glanced over at the doorbell, which was too far and too high up for him to reach. He sighed and shifted the brown envelope on his lap to behind his b
ack. Squaring his shoulders, he planted his hands firmly on the armrests.
He pushed himself to his feet without much effort. He’d done it countless times during physiotherapy sessions. But he’d always done so with a harness and support beams to hold his weight.
Off balance, Julian tipped forward.
He pressed a hand against the door and paused a moment to take a deep breath. Then, moving his hand to the door handle, he gripped it and focused on moving his feet.
One step forward. You can do it, Hayley’s voice played in his head. It was as if she was right beside him, just like all those times in his sessions.
“Okay, Julian. You can do this.” It wasn’t just shuffling his feet forward. He had to lift his knees and take the two steps up. Something he hadn’t done since the car accident. Focus.
Julian sighed and dropped his foot heavily on the first step. He wiped the perspiration dripping down his temple off on his shoulder, then adjusted his grip on the door handle and focused on doing the same with his other leg.
He grinned when he climbed the two short steps and wished Hayley was there with him to see this. Or not. Since she might decide that he was well enough for her to leave.
Refusing to entertain that thought now, he rang the doorbell and shifted his hand from the door handle. He didn’t want to fall flat on his face when the Casas opened the door, so he shifted to press his hand against the wall for support instead.
It took so much of his focus to remain on his feet that it took him a moment to rearrange his features into his charming smile when the door opened.
“What are you doing here?” Frank asked with a deep frown. “Do you know what time it is?”
“What’s going on?” Paula joined Frank at the door. “You. You’re out of your wheelchair.”
“It’s behind me.”
“What are you doing here so early?” Paula asked.
“Hayley’s usually up at six, and I didn’t want her alone at home.”
“You have guards and maids at your place,” Frank said.
“Right. I meant I wanted to be with her. Can we talk for a few minutes?”
“We’re not interested in whatever you have to say.”
“Five minutes.” Julian slapped his hand on the door that was about to be slammed in his face. “I have the annulment papers.” He leaned against the doorway so Frank and Paula could see the envelope on the wheelchair. “I’ll sign them in front of you if you hear me out for five minutes.”
Frank and Paula shared a look before stepping back from the door. “Five minutes,” they said together.
“Umm.” The last thing Julian wanted was to ask the Casas for help, but he couldn’t walk into the house. He doubted he could remain standing for another minute. “I need my wheelchair.”
Frank sighed and moved past him. He hoisted the wheelchair up the steps and into the house.
Julian dropped heavily back onto the wheelchair. He hated being this weak, but he wasn’t going to sit around and mope anymore. He was going to get better. He already was. He wheeled the chair around in the limited space and moved over to the coffee table.
Frank and Paula were seated on the reddish brown leather couch. Behind them was a huge portrait of Frank, Paula, Leanne, and Hayley. A professional photo taken in a studio. Flanking the portrait were dozens of photos of the four of them.
Julian had one of those portraits with his father and stepmother. Except they weren’t laughing with their arms wound around each other. The portrait at his parents’ place was solemn. His parents were seated on chairs in front of him while he stood behind them. Was he even smiling in the photo?
“Say what you want and go,” Frank said, pulling his attention back to their stern expressions.
Paula pulled onto her lap one of the six cushions of different colors, each with a Bible verse printed on it.
“First off, I want to apologize for what happened yesterday. I’ve apologized to Hayley, and I wanted to drop by to apologize to you two too.”
“Why?” Paula asked, her brows drawn together.
“Because you’re important to Hayley.”
Paula gave him a side-eye glance filled with skepticism.
“I can’t do anything about how I’ve treated her in the past. I’m not sure what she told you—”
“Leanne filled us in,” Frank said.
So they’d heard the worst of him. Julian nodded. “But I promise I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to her. I’ll—”
Frank crossed his arms. “She’s leaving you once you’re up on your feet. There’s no rest of your life.”
“I’ll do everything in my power to change her mind.” He held his hand up when he saw the anger flash in Frank’s eyes. “But it will be her choice. If she wants to leave, she can leave. I’ll make sure her parents don’t do anything stupid to force her to stay.”
Julian pulled off the pen he’d clipped onto the envelope and took out the papers inside. He put the papers down on the dark brown coffee table, next to the small potted plant in the middle. He waved the pen to get their attention, then signed the papers. After stuffing the papers back into the envelope, he pushed it toward Frank. “You can keep this. Anytime you want, Hayley can sign on the dotted lines and it will be as if the marriage never happened.”
Paula, who had been quietly observing him all this time, asked, “Why are you doing this if you want her to stay?”
“This is me giving her a choice. She doesn’t think I’ll want her around after I’ve recovered, but I want her to be part of my life.” He smiled. “I want to take her to places she’d never been. I want to spoil her with things she thinks she doesn’t need.” He thought about how she’d laughed during their conversation. “I want to make her happy. I know it’ll take time for me to prove to her that I’m not in love with her just because she’s my rock right now.”
Paula’s brows twitched before turning to Frank again.
Frank shook his head. “You won’t even remember her once you go back to your normal life, to the secretary prancing in and out of your office.”
“I’ve given instructions for my new secretary to be a guy.”
Paula rolled her eyes. “You don’t have much confidence in yourself, huh.”
“I’ve already hurt Hayley once. I don’t want to give her any reason to have doubts about me.” He straightened his back. “I’m not asking you to give me your blessing. I’m here to apologize and tell you that I will do anything to make Hayley happy.”
“Even if that means an annulment,” Frank said, and Julian nodded.
“Very well.” Frank stood and opened the door. “You can leave now.”
Julian had expected a worse reception. He thought for certain that Paula would chase him out with a broom while Frank threatened him with a gun. So, he supposed, the meeting turned out pretty well.
He was ready to just wheel himself down the two steps and hope he didn’t fall on his face. But thankfully, Desmond was standing right outside, and he and Frank helped him maneuver down the steps.
“Desmond,” Frank said when Julian was back on the concrete footpath. “I didn’t expect to see you with this man. Aren’t you supposed to be Hayley’s chauffeur?”
Desmond adjusted his black suit. “I’m sure this is what Miss Hayley would want me to do.”
“Desmond.” Paula popped her head out of the house. “Have you had breakfast?”
“No, ma’am.”
“I’ll pack something for you and Hayley. Give me a minute.”
The door slammed behind him.
Julian sighed.
“At least they let you in,” Desmond said, and Julian laughed once. The chauffeur strode ahead and opened the car door for Julian, then headed back to wait outside the house after packing Julian’s wheelchair into the trunk. “Should I keep both breakfasts for myself, Sir?”
“No, it’s okay. I’m sure Hayley would love to have that.” Julian wasn’t going to keep this visit from Hayley anyway. Even if
he did, he was sure she’d hear about it from the Casas.
He just hoped Hayley wouldn’t be too upset with him for showing up at the Casas without talking to her first.
Chapter Seventeen
“GOOD MORNING,” JULIAN said when Hayley pulled out a chair next to him at the dining table. “Did you sleep well?”
She looked away for a moment and cleared her throat. No, she hadn’t slept well. She had replayed his kisses in her head, over and over. Then she tried to suppress her giddiness with a stern talk about not being a fool.
She’d been stupid enough for the past twenty-three years. “I slept well. Did you?”
“Not really. I had a hard time falling asleep.”
Hayley refused to meet his gaze, and Julian grinned.
“We still have leftover cake from yesterday. Do you want Anita to bake you some muffins today?”
She shook her head. “Cake’s fine.”
“Miss Hayley, your mail.”
Hayley stared at the letters in Doreen’s hand. There was more than one today. She took the letters from her. “Thank you.” Besides the cards, she hadn’t received any other letters at Julian’s penthouse. So she didn’t have to open them to find out what they were.
And judging from how Julian was staring at them, she supposed he’d come to the same conclusion.
She opened the first envelope and pulled out the card within. Have you been thinking about me? She lifted the top of the card. I’ve never stopped thinking about you.
Hayley dropped the first letter and opened the next. I missed you. She clenched her jaws when she saw the inside of the card. I’ll be seeing you soon.
She didn’t realize she was clutching the card until Julian covered her hand with his and gently pried it away from her. “I guess Ted Shears knows I’m still here.”
“Let’s get a private investigator.”
“How would that help?”
“I don’t have a lot of confidence in Detective Miller.”
Hayley shrugged.
“Hayley, promise you won’t go anywhere without security with you,” he said in a deep voice, oozing with a serious dose of manliness.
