Love Me or Miss Me

by Dream Jordan

  Felicia plopped down next to me and exclaimed, “OMG! So tell me more about Percy. Where’d you meet him? How old is he? Why haven’t you mentioned him to me before the festival?”

  “Whoa, slow down,” I said, laughing. “You got twenty-one questions!”

  “Can’t help myself,” exclaimed Felicia, giggling. “Percy is definitely a cutie-pie!”

  “I know, right?” I beamed. “He’s really feeling me, too. He can’t keep his hands off me—”

  Just as I was about to give Felicia the full scoop, my cell phone rang. This was such a proud moment. I coolly whipped out my pink BlackBerry Pearl from my pocket, all smooth and cool. Yes, your girl, Kate, was flossing with her Pearl. I checked Felicia’s reaction from the corner of my eye, but I couldn’t tell what she was thinking.

  “Hey, baby,” said Percy in his sexy deep voice. “How you doing?”

  “I’m good,” I replied, smiling.

  “Where are you?” he asked.

  “Felicia’s house.”

  “Who, Miss Africa?” Percy laughed. I chortled, uncomfortably. Felicia was sitting right next to me and could probably hear him. So I got up and walked over to the window, pretending to look outside.

  “Listen, change of plans for today,” Percy began. “One of our customers sold me last-minute tickets for a Broadway play called King of Pride. We have to be in Manhattan by two o’clock. Can you be ready in time?”

  “Sure,” I exclaimed. Wow, this would be my first Broadway play ever. Percy was really going hard for me!

  “Right now I’m downtown running errands for my mother,” explained Percy. “So can you meet me in front of Macy’s by one o’clock?”

  “No problem,” I said, without thinking about all I had to get done, namely my hair. My cornbraids were mad frizzy, and I didn’t have time to go all the way back to the group home to fix it. But even that fact couldn’t lessen my excitement.

  “I can’t wait to see you, sweetheart,” said Percy.

  “Same here,” I replied.

  I hung up the phone, grinning, my heart fluttering. So many times I had to overhear Marlon talking sweet nothings to Felicia, while I had nothing. Now I had something, a real relationship. I was finally someone else’s sweetheart, and I was going to see a Broadway play with that someone, a special someone I never dreamed I could get.

  Before I could turn from the window, I felt Felicia’s breath on my neck.

  “Wow, cool phone,” she said, her eyes mad wide.

  “Thanks.” I beamed. “Percy gave it to me.”

  Felicia’s eyebrows twitched, and she paused before saying, “Oh … that’s nice.”

  “What’s wrong?” I asked.

  “Nothing,” said Felicia, averting her eyes.

  “But your whole attitude just changed,” I insisted.

  “I said nothing’s wrong.”

  I twisted my lips to the side, which was my yeah-right look. “Felicia, come on now. How long have I known you? Why are you fronting? Tell me why your whole face just changed. What’s the matter?”

  Real talk, Felicia was ruining my moment. My agenda was supposed to be: give her the scoop about my two magical dates with Percy, get my dress, thank her profusely, and be out.

  But now this.

  I refused to leave Felicia’s crib without making sure she was okay. Point-blank, period, I had to know what was up.

  “Do I ever hold back on you?” I asked, growing frustrated.

  “Kate, please don’t press me,” Felicia pleaded. “Nothing is wrong. I swear.”

  Whatever.

  When you’re really tight with someone, they can lie with all their might, and you can still see right through them.

  “Spill it, Felicia,” I insisted. “Don’t have all day.”

  Felicia heaved a big sigh and said, “Okay, since you asked for it.” She couldn’t even look at me when she began to explain. “I don’t mean any harm … but isn’t it too soon for Percy to be giving you a phone … an expensive phone at that?”

  Oh, is that all?

  “It’s not a new phone,” I quickly explained. I walked over to Felicia’s bed and plopped down to put my sneakers back on. I was gearing up to go, even though I could tell Felicia had some more nonsense to say.

  “Kate, don’t you think it’s too soon to be giving out phones, period? I mean, Percy seems like a really nice guy, but you’ve only known him for what … a week or two?”

  “Hi, hater,” I said, half-jokingly.

  “I’m not hating,” Felicia objected. “Just concerned.”

  “Concerned about what?” I asked, cocking my head to the side.

  “Well, the only reason I know a guy to give a girl a phone so soon is to keep track of her … I mean, you just met the guy.”

  “Not true,” I corrected. “Percy and I have known each other for years. Besides, like I said, it’s not even a new phone. So please relax.” I chuckled, trying to keep the mood light.

  “Okay, let me mind my business.… It’s just that … well, you know my mom is a prosecutor … and I hear a lot of stories.”

  “Yeah, okay, I feel you,” I said.

  I had to admit, Percy was spending money on me mad quick. But he was holding down a job, his parents were paid, so I knew he wasn’t hurting for cash. Shoot, at least I didn’t have to sleep with him to get mine.

  And how else was Percy supposed to stay in touch with me if he didn’t give me this BlackBerry? Felicia knew the group home drama I had going on, so why was she acting brand-new?

  Besides, Tisha was the main one forever lecturing me about knowing that I deserve the best in life. So why should I question all this good stuff I was finally getting? Why not appreciate the gift-giving while it lasted?

  “Just be careful,” said Felicia. “That’s all I’m saying.”

  “Yeah, yeah, I feel you,” I said, growing antsy. I had no time for lectures. I had things to do.

  I been ready to bounce. But then I suddenly remembered: my dress. So I kept my butt planted on the bed, regreting that I had to depend on someone else for my gear; it was the same sad story last year. My ex-friend Naleejah had treated me like a straight-up charity case, and had reminded me about my sorry hand-me-down existence to a whole audience’s face. Although Felicia would never do me like that, my clothing dependency was still whack. Right then and there, I vowed to start earlier on my summer job hunt next year, so I would have some real paper in my pocket to buy my own dang clothes for a change.

  “Well, Percy definitely is a cutie-pie,” said Felicia, as an afterthought. Probably trying to make me feel better.

  “Isn’t he, though?” I said. “So um, can I get my dress now?”

  “Where are you guys headed?” she asked, still forcing an unconcerned air.

  “Um, Percy says it’s a surprise,” I fibbed. If Felicia was already questioning my phone, why would I fix my mouth to tell her about a Broadway play?

  Felicia moseyed over to her walk-in closet and pulled out a small red shopping bag. I took the bag and said, “You really saved me, girl. Good looking out…”

  Then my voice trailed off. I suddenly realized I needed shoes, too. Couldn’t rock my raggedy sneakers with a banging stretch dress.

  Felicia’s feet are way bigger than mine so I couldn’t borrow her boats. The only other choice was to ask for a loan, something I had never in my life done before; my pride had never let me … until now. “Um, Felicia, can you lend me a twenty until Friday?”

  Felicia opened her brown eyes wide, clearly shocked. As many times as she tried to push cash on me, even in my neediest times, I’ve always said no … so I could see why she was stunned.

  “Is everything okay, Kate?”

  “Everything’s fine,” I said. “I just forgot my money at home, and I need to pick up a few things. Don’t worry, I promise to pay you back on Friday.”

  Felicia tapped my arm. “Stop playing, you know I trust you. I just can’t believe you’re finally asking. How many times ha
ve I told you that you never have to go without as long as you have me?”

  “Aw, thanks girl,” I said.

  Felicia walked over to her shiny cherrywood desk, and pulled out her wallet from the top drawer. She handed me the twenty. But I felt like she still had some unexpressed Percy questions. So it was time to make my exit. Quick.

  “Well … Marlon is probably missing you,” I said.

  “Oh … okay.”

  Felicia’s demeanor was still funny-style. I couldn’t believe she was still concerned over a silly phone. Because really? It wasn’t that serious. And honestly, I couldn’t care less what she thought. I was ecstatic about my new phone and my new man, and I didn’t want anybody bringing me down.

  Felicia followed me downstairs. I poked my head into the kitchen and said my good-byes. Once outside, Felicia leaned against her door’s frame and said, “Have a nice time.”

  “Thanks, girl,” I called over my shoulder. “I will!”

  I ran all the way to the Utica Avenue train station, and was still catching my breath when the A train pulled in.

  On the train, I plotted my action plan. First, I was going to run to the beauty store to buy some gel and a cheap scarf to press down the frizz in my cornbraids real quick. Then I was going to find some decent-looking sandals for under fifteen dollars.

  However, as soon as I made it out of the Jay Street train station, I ended up stumbling upon a random discount-shoe store. I bought a pair of average black open-toe sandals. Planned to buy gel and scarf next. But then I checked my Blackberry and discovered it was fifteen minutes to one.

  Oops, no time for that! I flew inside Macy’s third-floor bathroom, slipped into my sexy dress, my sandals, and then, with horror, stared into the mirror at my fuzzy head of hair. I already knew it was bad, but the bright light emphasized the fright. Nothing I could do, though. There was no time. In a panic, I rushed outside to meet Percy.

  Chapter 16

  I dashed up to my post in front of Macy’s, and waited for Percy. At one o’clock on the dot, he strolled up to me, looking gorgeous. His hair was cut close to his perfectly shaped head, and his edges were lined up with precision. He wore a navy-blue short-sleeved polo shirt, baggy beige shorts, and tan grown-man sandals. His vanilla-almond skin glistened in the sun. First thing he said to me, “Wow, sweetheart, you look really good … but why didn’t you fix your hair?”

  “Yeah, I know,” I stuttered, “but you didn’t give me enough time to get ready.”

  “Oh, so it’s my fault?” Percy asked with raised eyebrows.

  “No, no, I’m not saying that—”

  “Forget it,” interrupted Percy.

  Without grabbing my hand like he usually did, Percy started walking down the block and expected me to follow. Meanwhile, dudes on all sides of me had their tongues wagging out their mouths at the sight of my curvaceous body sheathed in yellow stretch material—fuzzy hair and all. Maybe Percy suddenly realized this, because halfway down the block, he finally reached for my hand. When we got to his car, he held the car door open for me.

  Back to being a gentleman, thank you very much.

  During the ride to Manhattan, Percy was quiet. The radio was pumping loud bass-driven beats. I just sat back in my seat, enjoying the view of the busy streets, and then the Brooklyn Bridge, vowing to one day walk over it, hopefully with Percy.

  We made it to the theater in record time. I stared up at the brightly lit marquee for the King of Pride, and started getting excited. When we got inside the theater, I was bowled over by everything. I stared in awe at the huge glittering crystal chandeliers, hundreds of red seats in neat rows, and fancy-looking folks mixed in with casually dressed people.

  “I lucked up getting these tickets,” said Percy, out of the blue.

  “I’m glad you did,” I exclaimed. “This is my first Broadway play.”

  “Yeah, I can tell,” said Percy.

  The usher showed us to our seats and handed us our playbills. I already planned to put my playbill straight into my Lifebook’s inner fold. This was such an exquisite experience, I needed to preserve it.

  We sat in the middle row, close enough to see the full stage. My mouth dropped open as soon as the curtains parted, revealing a breathtaking backdrop painted bright red, orange, and cobalt blue. Tribal beats filled the theater and huge puppets and people in masks began running across the stage, dancing and singing all over the place. One magical scene flowed into the next. By the time the show was over, I was close to tears. It was such an amazing experience. I wanted to yell out, “Encore, I want more!” But I didn’t dare. Percy would probably not approve.

  Once outside of the theater, he turned to me and asked, “Enjoyed the show?”

  “Big-time,” I exclaimed. “Thanks for taking me … wow.”

  “You hungry?”

  “For sure,” I said.

  We were walking down Forty-second Street and Percy stopped short in front of McDonald’s. “I would take you somewhere much nicer to eat, but I have to rush back to the store. My mother’s doing inventory today, of all days.” Now he looked pissed.

  “I’m not mad at McDonald’s,” I said, trying to cheer him up. “Love me some French fries!”

  We stepped inside McDonald’s, and I had to double-check the double arches on the cashiers’ shirts because I had never been in such a clean and fancy fast-food restaurant in my life. I was surrounded by nice brick walls and dim lighting and computers lined up to my right. “This is the baddest Mickey D’s I’ve ever been in,” I exclaimed.

  “Please, this is nothing,” he replied. “I’ll show you a real fancy restaurant … one day.”

  Without asking me what I wanted, Percy placed two orders of McNuggets and fries. I asked him to add a hot chocolate to the order. “Hot chocolate in the summer time?” he exclaimed.

  “I have a taste for it. Love me some hot chocolate,” I said, giggling.

  But I stopped giggling when he ordered me fruit punch instead.

  No reason to beef about it, especially not after my beautiful Broadway treat, so I ate my food, and drank my punch with a smile.

  Percy finished eating before me. He pushed back his chair and got up before I was through eating my last few fries; I gobbled them down and got up, too.

  His car was parked on Fortieth Street, close to Bryant Park.

  “It’s a nice day, let’s sit in the park for a few minutes,” said Percy.

  He grabbed my hand and led me across the street. There was a huge fountain in front of us spewing water. People sat all around us, reading newspapers, lying out to get some sun, and just plain old chilling. Percy pushed two green chairs together and made us a bootleg loveseat. We faced the huge lawn and he wrapped his arm around me, stroking my shoulder with his warm hand. No words were exchanged, but it was such a romantic moment, a moment that unfortunately had to end way too quick.

  “I have to head back,” Percy said with a sigh.

  “Well, I had a really nice time.”

  “Me, too, sweetheart,” said Percy. “I love being around you. You make me happy.”

  * * *

  I went to bed dreaming of Percy; and woke up in the middle of the night scared to death. First, I heard Jeselle’s voice. Then I opened my eyes to the sight of someone climbing through our window. I sat up in bed with a jolt.

  My eyes adjusted to the darkness. I realized it was just Tracy.

  “We forgot to tell you,” whispered Jeselle, “got us a new system. If you want to stay out overnight with your man, just let us know and we got you.”

  Jeselle explained the system, the fake body in the bed, and the window tap. Tracy and I still weren’t on full speaking terms, but having one another’s back in sneaky situations was customary in most group homes. It’s usually “us” against “staff,” so we had to look out for each other no matter what.

  I almost busted out laughing when Tracy uncovered the two large plastic bags full of clothes that was supposed to be her body. I had never seen
this brand of trickery before. Reminded me of a jailbreak plot.

  Later that day, I said to Jeselle. “Shoot, as long as Belinda and Gerald work here, it seems like we don’t even have to go through all that body-bag stuff. We can just walk straight through the front door any time of day. They don’t care.”

  Jeselle waved her hand to dismiss my comment. “Nah, girl, we can’t be doing things straight to their face. That would be disrespectful.”

  “But batty Belinda barely makes the rounds for head counts,” I joked. “Does she even have a brain inside her head?”

  “Yeah, but the body-bag trick is better than nothing,” Jeselle insisted.

  Meanwhile, I was thinking how I might be needing a body bag soon. Percy had hinted that he wanted me to spend the night with him. This is something I would have never considered if Common Grounds was a normal group home. But since staff was such a big joke here, why not go for broke in order to please my man?

  Chapter 17

  I WANT TO SEE YOU, BABY. I MISS YOU.

  I MISS YOU TOO.

  CAN YOU COME OVER MY FATHER’S HOUSE TODAY?

  YES.

  COOL. MEET ME AT JAY STREET. SAME SPOT. SIX O’CLOCK.

  OKAY.

  My Friday was all set. First, I had to pay Felicia back her money as promised. Then, I had to see my baby. Since Felicia and Marlon already had movie plans at the Court Street Theater, I would be able to kill two birds with one stone. The theater was only a few blocks from where I had to meet Percy. So first stop, the theater.

  Felicia and Marlon were standing outside waiting for me, dressed like twins again: identical purple T-shirts, and blue jean shorts. So corny and cute of them. “Y’all are too much,” I laughed, handing Felicia a crispy twenty-dollar bill.

  “Oh goody,” she exclaimed. “Now we can get some extra popcorn, Marlon!”

  I chuckled at how Felicia loved to play off her wealth. Homegirl could buy a hundred bags of popcorn if she really wanted to. But no one would ever guess from the raggedy way she dressed. I admired her humbleness, though. So many kids in the hood be dressing too good with no money in the bank. I’d rather be rich and raggedy than fly and faking it. Who do I need to impress? Well, maybe Percy.…