Hatefully Yours

by Callahan, Kelli

  His version of events are a lot different than what Brooke described—maybe he’s so dense that he doesn’t realize how much of an asshole he really is.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Brooke

  Trent returned from his meetings and went over all of the details with me. There was a lot of work for us to do, so we got started immediately. We had pretty much taken over the conference room on our side of The Great Divide. Nobody else was using it, and we found that it was easier to be in the same room while we worked. The girl I used to be would have died and gone to heaven if she had a chance to spend that much time with Trent Rigsby, but she wouldn’t have gotten any work done.

  “Do you want to take a break for lunch?” Trent looked up at me and then glanced out the window. “Oh, it’s raining. Maybe we should order something.”

  “Does Famous Sid’s deliver?” I raised an eyebrow inquisitively and reached for my phone.

  “Yeah, they do.” He nodded.

  I found Famous Sid’s on my Door Dash app and put in our orders. That gave us more time to work while we waited for our food to be delivered. The rain caused a little bit of a delay, so I was practically starving by the time it arrived. We stopped working long enough to devour our food, and Trent had another meeting to get ready for, so he went to his office after we were done. I went over the work we had done that morning and waited for him to return so we could move on to the next part of the project.

  It’s kind of lonely in here without Trent. Maybe the gloomy weather is just rubbing off on me.

  I might not have been able to open my heart to Trent the way I did when I was younger, but I couldn’t deny that I liked our new dynamic. The charming and kind boy that I remembered was still hidden underneath the calloused man Trent had become—but he seemed to wear that callousness like it was a suit of armor. Once I saw past it, I realized that he hadn’t changed much. He wasn’t an evil bastard; he was simply processing emotions that he never took the time to address when he left Cabot Beach. His anger towards me when I first started working at Remington Global wasn’t hatred—it was a reflection of our past. Those emotions had to come to the surface before they could be wiped away.

  “Okay, I’m back.” Trent opened the conference room.

  “Awesome.” I looked over my shoulder. “How did it go?”

  “Mr. Remington went over some ideas for the presentation.” Trent sat down across from me. “I also found out that the CEO is coming to hear our pitch.”

  “Wow!” I blinked in surprise. “They must be putting some serious thought into their new business strategy if he’s coming to hear the presentation personally.”

  “Yeah, I’m sure Mr. Remington didn’t hold back. He’s a hell of a salesman.” Trent laughed. “There’s one more thing I haven’t talked to Mr. Remington about—I wanted to discuss it with you first.”

  “What’s that?” I tilted my head inquisitively.

  “I would like for you to lead the presentation.” Trent leaned back in his chair. “These are your ideas—I want the CEO of Xavier Wholesale to see the same passion that convinced Mr. Remington to move forward with this project, to begin with.”

  “Uh…” I felt anxiety course through my veins. “Do you really think I’m ready for that?”

  “I wouldn’t have brought it up if I didn’t.” Trent smiled and leaned forward. “I’ve had plenty of opportunities over the years, and I have nothing to prove at this point, but I wouldn’t be where I am today if I didn’t jump on a few of them that were outside of my comfort zone.”

  “Well I’m not jumping.” I raised my eyebrows in concern. “I feel like I’m sort of being pushed…”

  “I had a couple of shoves along the way.” Trent laughed under his breath. “If you were able to hold it together long enough to present your ideas to Mr. Remington, then you’re going to be fine. We’ll do a few practice runs when we get everything laid out.”

  “Okay.” I smiled and nodded. “I’ll trust you…”

  I never thought I would say that again—or mean it.

  It was hard to focus on the work I had to do for the rest of the afternoon because my anxiety over the presentation took center stage. I wanted to believe that I was ready for a major presentation like that, but I had some lingering doubts. The fact Trent suggested it meant he was willing to put a lot of faith in me—the fact that Mr. Remington agreed with his suggestion meant that the CEO of the company thought enough of me to allow it. I hoped the two of them were able to see something that I couldn’t because I felt like I needed more time before I was ready for that kind of responsibility.

  “We should probably just call it a day.” Trent closed his laptop. “I can tell that you aren’t really focused.”

  “I’m sorry.” I sighed. “I’m just worried about the presentation.”

  “The CEO of Xavier Wholesale is one of Mr. Remington’s friends.” Trent leaned across the table and put his hand on mine. “He’s the perfect person for your first major presentation. If you stumble a few times, it’s okay—he’s not going to storm out of the room. I’m sure our boss is going to tell him that you haven’t been working here long.”

  “I hope you’re right.” I looked down, and when my brain processed where his hand was, I pulled away. “But yes—we should probably just call a day. I’ll be more focused after I have some time to give myself a few pep talks.”

  “Hopefully, over a drink.” Trent chuckled.

  “Yeah, I might need one or two.” I nodded in agreement.

  “Want to have your first one with me?” He tilted his head inquisitively. “Yarrow is within walking distance…”

  Yarrow? Oh right, the bar I pass every morning…

  “Nah, my roommate is a bartender.” I shook my head quickly. “She’ll take good care of me.”

  “Okay.” I could hear a little bit of disappointment in Trent’s voice. “I just meant as friends—I hope you didn’t think I was suggesting anything more than that.”

  “Of course.” I nodded quickly.

  I don’t know if I’m ready for that yet—or maybe I’m afraid of how tempting it is.

  * * *

  We spent the rest of the week getting ready for the presentation, which led to a lot of long hours—more time than we had ever actually spent together, even when we were younger. There was something going on in my head that I couldn’t get my thoughts to process. I liked hanging out with Trent at the office. I hated being in the conference room by myself when he had meetings to attend because I liked spending time with him, even if we were just trying to find the balance between friendship and the advertising campaign we were working on. The barrier that always said never again was trying to crack—every time I lingered too long in that ocean-blue stare, I felt another ripple along the surface.

  “I don’t feel ready.” I stared at the mock-up we made for the presentation. “I’m still nervous…”

  “Then go through it again.” He leaned back in his chair. “Pretend that I’m Mr. Remington—or the CEO of Xavier Wholesale.”

  “Okay.” I nodded and started to stand up. “Try to think of some questions they might ask. I want to be ready for anything.”

  “Sure.” He nodded. “Start with the first slide—you should go over your introduction a few more times anyway.”

  It was fairly easy to go over my presentation with Trent. I didn’t feel the same pressure I knew I would have to deal with when I had a room full of strangers staring at me. Trent offered me guidance, pointed out a few things that I needed to elaborate on, and asked questions that provoked good conversation about our campaign. I didn’t know if it was possible for me to be more prepared, but I liked being able to practice my spiel. By the end of the day, I felt a lot more relaxed. It wasn’t likely to last, even if it gave me a temporary respite. I had a couple of days away from the office to dwell on it—it would have been easier if I could just get it over with so that I didn’t have to keep stressing about everything.

  “Do you h
ave any plans for the weekend?” Trent looked across the table at me while we packed up at the end of the day.

  “Nothing special…” I shook my head back and forth. “How about you? Got a hot date lined up?”

  Why did I ask that? It’s none of my business if he does…

  “No.” He laughed under his breath. “I’m not seeing anyone right now. I was—but we weren’t right for each other.”

  “Still breaking hearts?” I winced as soon as I asked, but my question didn’t seem to upset him.

  “It’s kind of complicated. We wanted different things out of life.” He sighed. “I should have ended it a long time ago…”

  “Easier said than done.” I shrugged. “I’ve been there.”

  “I don’t suppose I can convince you to celebrate the end of the week with me over a drink?” he asked.

  Damn—that’s the second time this week he’s asked me. But I can’t do that—even if it’s even more tempting this time.

  “Nah, I’m going to go home and review everything for the presentation a few more times before I go to bed.” I leaned forward and started to stand.

  “Okay.” He nodded. “Have a good weekend.”

  “You too.” I smiled and walked to the door.

  I had no idea if a drink was just a drink, or if Trent was hoping that it would lead to more. Our work relationship was repaired, our friendship was slowly coming back together, and I didn’t want to lose the progress we had made. I allowed myself to forgive, but there were some things that weren’t easy to forget. There was too much pain if we ventured too far into the past. Seeing signs of the guy I fell in love with underneath his calloused exterior stirred up enough memories without adding alcohol to the mix. I trusted Trent—more than I should have after the way he treated me—but deep down, I wasn’t sure I could completely trust myself. My heart still remembered how I used to feel about him, and a part of it wanted to have that drink just to see where it went after our glasses were empty.

  God help me. Am I that close to falling for him all over again?

  Chapter Nineteen

  Trent

  I went home alone to an empty apartment, just like I had done every night since Maria left her key on the counter. I didn’t regret ending my relationship with her. It was best for both of us to move on, and she didn’t wait long. Less than a week after I told her that we were done, she was on the cover of a tabloid magazine with one of her co-stars—a married co-star. I didn’t feel any emotion when I stared at that picture. Truthfully, I never felt much of anything when I was with Maria. She was a distraction when I needed it, and she never fully committed to our relationship, even after I told her she could move in if she decided to give up her lease. I didn’t know how to rebound that easily, even from a relationship I wasn’t invested in.

  I know why. It’s the same reason every other relationship has gone up in flames for the last five years.

  Every time I got close to someone, the memories of what happened in Cabot Beach came back with a vengeance. I didn’t know how to feel like anything other than garbage—because that was how I treated my heart. It wanted Brooke so fucking bad, but I fed it lust instead of love. The one time I listened to it and returned to Cabot Beach on the day she graduated, I let myself get overwhelmed with physical desire instead of chasing the emotional connection I had with the girl I loved. That one mistake made it impossible to enjoy the company of anyone else beyond the bedroom.

  I pretended like the past didn’t matter, but it mattered more than I ever realized until I saw Brooke again. My first instinct was to guard myself from the pain and push her away. It was easy to look at everything I accomplished since I left Cabot Beach and believe it was worth protecting because it was all that I had. I clung to my work accolades, my nice apartment, and the car that was too expensive for me to drive—there wasn’t anything else to cling to. The apology didn’t cleanse my soul, and neither did her forgiveness because it was stained with a mistake that words couldn’t erase—mired with regret that couldn’t be undone.

  I’d give it all up if I could turn back the hands of time with the strength of a man who has spent a lot of lonely nights in the shadow of that one mistake.

  * * *

  I got to work so early on Monday morning that the sun hadn’t even come up yet. I had a meeting on my calendar with Mr. Remington that started before I normally even made it into the office. I didn’t even have time to make coffee before I left my apartment, so I stopped in the cafeteria to grab a cup before I took the elevator to the top floor. Mr. Remington was a busy man, so I didn’t mind coming in early for a meeting if he was able to carve some time out for me on his calendar. I still had no idea how he managed to fit his new pet project into his schedule. I had been at the company for several years and only met him once before I was an Emerging Leader. I was surprised he even knew my name—much less the name of someone who reported to me.

  I hope my memory is that good when I’m his age…

  “Good morning!” Mr. Remington’s secretary, Catherine, greeted me when I stepped off the elevator. “Mr. Remington is waiting for you in the conference room.”

  “Awesome, thank you.” I smiled. “And good morning…”

  It was impossible not to have butterflies in my stomach before I walked into a meeting with one of the richest men in the world. I knew how much his time was worth, and I didn’t want to waste it. Every year, he allowed his favorite charity to do a dinner auction, and people usually bid a couple of million just to sit across the table from him for an hour. Sure, people bid more to sit across the table from Warren Buffett and Bill Gates, but that didn’t make it any less impressive. I certainly wouldn’t have been able to pay for Mr. Remington’s time by the hour.

  “Thank you for coming in so early, Trenton.” Mr. Remington motioned to me when I stepped into the room. “I’m sorry we couldn’t meet a little later in the day—I have a flight that leaves in a few hours.”

  “No problem at all.” I smiled and gave him a polite nod. “I have put together some stuff for the presentation. I assume that’s what you want to see this morning.”

  “You can email me that.” He shook his head. “I’ll look it over on my flight. I actually just wanted to talk about your strategy for the presentation.”

  “Absolutely.” I sat down at the table.

  “The agenda you sent has Ms. Weiss leading the discussion? Are you sure she’s ready for that?” He tilted his head inquisitively.

  “I honestly thought you would like to see her lead it.” I blinked a couple of times and leaned back apprehensively. “You were really impressed with everything she put together.”

  “Her ideas were solid, but I want to make sure this presentation is flawless.” Mr. Remington nodded. “Part of being an Emerging Leader that goes on to be an executive at this company is knowing how to properly utilize your resources. I’ve seen plenty of people with great ideas that weren’t able to explain them with enough cohesiveness to make someone buy into them.”

  “She sold you on them.” I tilted my head slightly and smiled. “I’m sure she was nervous, but she wasn’t even prepared for that discussion.”

  “It was passable.” He narrowed his eyes. “Fine, I’ll stop beating around the bush since you don’t seem to want to volunteer the information. Fulton said that you’ve been having problems with her—he said you had to write her up because she missed a deadline.”

  Oh shit. Is that what this is about? Fulton—that asshole.

  “That was a misunderstanding.” I looked down and sighed. “It was my fault.”

  “Explain it to me then.” His voice got firmer.

  Fuck, I guess I walked right into that one.

  “Brooke and I didn’t meet here. We’re from the same hometown. I used to be really good friends with her brother—and…” My words trailed off as I tried to find a way to explain it to my boss.

  “You were involved with her?” He leaned forward. “That’s something I should have be
en made aware of when I put the two of you on this project. I assume everything was cleared with HR?”

  I’m just making this worse every time I open my mouth.

  “No.” I shook my head back and forth.

  “Which part? No, the two of you were never an item, or no, you didn’t clear it with HR?” I could hear the patience fading out of his voice.

  I’m just going to have to be honest.

  “Brooke and I were never an item.” I exhaled sharply. “We almost were, but I made a mistake and ruined it. That was five years ago—before she even went to college. When she started working here, I handled things poorly at first. It was my fault she missed that deadline. I’ve apologized to Brooke, and we’ve agreed to leave things in the past because this project is important to the both of us. I didn’t bring it up with HR because it was something that we worked through on our own.”

  “Okay.” He nodded. “I can usually tell when someone is lying or only giving me half the story. You sound sincere. Let’s go back to my previous question—is Brooke ready for this kind of responsibility?”

  “I believe that she is.” I felt a lump rise up in my throat, but I quickly swallowed it. “I wouldn’t have considered it if I thought she wasn’t going to be able to handle it.”

  “I’ll trust your judgment then, but just know—your career is riding on this too. I recently became an investor in Xavier Wholesale, and I want to get a nice return on it.” He leaned back in his chair. “I’m sure you know that I don’t like to lose money.”

  “I’m well aware of that, yes sir.” I nodded quickly.

  My stomach was in a knot when I left the meeting with Mr. Remington. I really did believe that Brooke could handle the presentation, but I didn’t like the additional pressure. I would have been better off just speculating about Mr. Remington’s intentions, and I certainly didn’t need to have him tell me to my face that my future at the company depended on the success of the presentation. I had to assume that my boss couldn’t get enough shares in Xavier Wholesale to make business decisions—which meant that we had to convince the CEO that our advertising campaign would make them more successful than they already were.