Termination Dust

by Alana Terry

  “You really haven’t been keeping up with the times, have you?”

  Kimmie blinked at her sister.

  “Coverage isn’t what it was three or five years ago. The whole trailer’s a hot spot. Mom even got herself a Facebook account. Used it on her phone all the time.”

  “What? You’re serious?”

  Meg chuckled. “I know. It was ridiculous, someone her age learning Facebook. But it was adorable, I swear.”

  “Why didn’t she tell me any of this?”

  “She probably didn’t want you to get in trouble with that jerkface she was with. Oh, by the way, is the kid asleep?”

  Kimmie glanced back again. “Yeah, he started dozing off right after we passed Mendeltna.”

  Meg let out her breath. “Good. I mean, I know he doesn’t talk and all, but I’d hate to have him hear what I’ve got to say about his dad.”

  “You can skip that part,” Kimmie said curtly. “I’m pretty sure I know more about that than you.”

  “Right. Well, so I got Mom that cell phone at Christmas …”

  “What’d you do?” Kimmie interrupted. “Hide it in the fruitcake?”

  Meg looked appalled. “No. I told her I’d left it with Mrs. Spencer next door.”

  “Mrs. Spencer knew Mom had a cell phone?” Kimmie thought back to all the times she’d trekked to her neighbor’s house to make a call. What kind of dysfunctional family did Mrs. Spencer think she was living next to?

  “You’re missing the point,” Meg complained. “The point is once Mom got her phone, she and I were able to stay in touch. She’d call me whenever Bozohead was taking a nap, and that’s how I found out just how bad things were.”

  Kimmie stared out the window at the mountains in the distance. Right now, their snow-dusted peaks felt closer to her than either her sister or her mom.

  “Hey, it’s not like she wanted to keep secrets from you.” Meg sounded defensive. “You know how things were at that home. Everyone had to keep everything from everybody. That’s just the way it was for you guys.”

  For you guys. Kimmie wondered how easy it was for her sister to throw around those kinds of phrases. For you guys.

  Apparently taking Kimmie’s silence for further offense, Meg ran her hand through her hair and huffed. “It’s not like it was easy for me either, Cinderella. You think I liked to hear about the things that creature was doing to you?”

  Kimmie bristled. Whatever happened to her under Chuck’s roof wasn’t her sister’s business. And the fact that Mom blabbed everything to such a snotty, stuck-up, plastic Barbie doll like Meg doubled the sense of betrayal.

  “Finally, Mom called me and said she wanted my help getting away.”

  Kimmie bet Meg just loved that. The chance for her big sister with the huge bank account and just as massive messiah complex to whisk in and save her wretched family from the clutches of evil. How grandiose. It must have given Meg quite the rush to be involved in anything more important than filing papers for her snotty husband.

  “Why are you glaring at me like that?” Meg finally demanded.

  “I’m not glaring.” Kimmie glowered out the window.

  “Yes, you are. You asked me a question. Now I’m telling you the answer, and you’re acting all hurt and depressed. It’s not like it’s something I like to talk about.”

  “You certainly had no problems telling everything to that trooper,” Kimmie blurted.

  “So that’s what this is about?” Meg had a bad habit of flaring her nostrils when she got angry, one of her only physically unattractive qualities. Kimmie reveled to see that her picture-perfect sister wasn’t quite as put together as she wanted everyone to believe. “Listen, if you’re upset because I went to the authorities to get you the help you obviously needed …”

  “I’m upset because you never cared!” Kimmie raised her voice, surrendering to the anger that gave her entire psyche a sense of power she’d rarely felt before. “You never cared. You ran off as soon as Mom got together with Chuck, and you never looked back.”

  Meg swerved to avoid hitting two ravens pecking at roadkill in the middle of their lane. “Is that what you think happened?” Her nostrils flared even more wildly.

  “That’s not what I think happened. That’s what I know happened.”

  Each time Meg spoke, her volume escalated. “You know nothing. Hear me? I died when I found out what that oaf was doing to Mom. I literally died. Want me to prove it?”

  She yanked up her sleeve. “See? That’s what I did when I heard. By the time Dwayne called the paramedics, I didn’t have a pulse. So don’t even think about talking to me about who’s suffered more or who put up with what or who hurts the most now that Mom’s gone. Because you don’t even know the half of it.”

  Meg gasped for breath as tears rolled down her cheeks. For what felt like minutes, Kimmie was too stunned to say a word. Finally, she forced herself to open the glove compartment where she found a travel packet of Kleenex. She pulled one out and offered it to her sister as a gesture of goodwill.

  “Thanks.” Meg blew her nose loudly then dabbed at her eyes. “I knew I shouldn’t have put on all that mascara.” She choked out a laugh. Kimmie joined in, feeling even more awkward and embarrassed than she’d been the day when she was ten and got caught trying on her sister’s pushup bra.

  “Mom never told me,” Kimmie finally confessed.

  Meg shrugged. “Of course she didn’t. She never knew.”

  Kimmie didn’t know what else to say. Staring at the snow capping the mountains ahead, she imagined how lonely and isolated it would feel to be up there looking down at a single car edging its way down a deserted highway.

  The termination dust glistened in the sunlight.

  CHAPTER 38

  Kimmie woke up when the car rolled to a stop. “Where are we?”

  “Just past the air force base,” Meg answered. “Looks like you got bored playing Cinderella and tried to be Sleeping Beauty for the day.”

  Kimmie wasn’t amused at her sister’s little joke. She must have crashed shortly after their fight about Mom because she didn’t remember anything else from the drive.

  “Has Pip been napping this whole time?” She turned around as best she could in her seat.

  “He’s fine. Poor kid needs his sleep.”

  Kimmie glanced at her sister and whispered, “Sorry.”

  Meg shrugged. “Me, too.”

  Kimmie wanted to say more. Needed to say more. She still didn’t know the details of Mom’s escape or anything else Meg had talked with the trooper about.

  “We’ll be home in a half an hour. Maybe a little less if traffic stays this light.”

  It had been years since Kimmie’s last trip to Anchorage. Pip had never been to a city this size, and she wondered if he’d be mesmerized by the traffic and crowds or terrified. She should warn Meg. Find a way to tell her about how Pip could freak out if too many changes were introduced at once. Maybe this move had been a bad idea after all. Then again, it’s not like they could have stayed in Glennallen. So much had happened since yesterday, she realized she hadn’t even called Jade to tell her she wasn’t coming in to the daycare.

  She winced in disapproval. “I can’t believe it.”

  “What’s wrong?” her sister asked.

  “I missed my shift at work. I didn’t let anybody know I wouldn’t be able to make it.”

  Meg tossed her hair over her shoulder. “I’m sure everyone will understand once you tell them about last night.”

  “Yeah, but I don’t even have their phone number,” Kimmie whined. Compared to nearly losing her brother to hypothermia and getting lost with him in the woods escaping from a murderous stepfather, missing work was a relatively minor burden, but she’d never flaked out like that before. She shook her head. “Jade’s going to hate me.”

  “Jade?” Meg repeated. “Is that the one whose phone you were borrowing the other day?”

  �
�Yeah.”

  “Then her number’s still in my cell. You can call her and save your conscience.” She tossed the phone onto Kimmie’s lap. “Here you go. Have at it.”

  Kimmie tried a few times but wasn’t even sure how to turn it on.

  “Wait,” Meg huffed, then softened her voice to add, “Let me do it.”

  “Can you do that while you’re driving?” Kimmie asked when her sister took her phone back.

  “Of course I can. It’s not like I’m dialing or anything.” She held the phone close to her mouth. “Siri, open recent calls.”

  Her request was met with a mechanical beep as the phone lit up.

  Meg passed it over. “Just find the one from yesterday and hit that green phone icon.”

  Kimmie still couldn’t get her mind around her own mother having a contraption this fancy. All those months and Chuck never found out? A second later, Jade was on the line, and Kimmie gave her the very abbreviated rundown of why she had to leave town.

  “Everything okay?” Meg asked when Kimmie ended the call.

  “Yeah,” she answered, feeling sheepish for being so worried earlier. “I guess strep’s going around the whole daycare, so Jade’s only got four kids in today anyway. She’s doing fine.”

  Meg didn’t say I told you so, but her smug smile spoke volumes.

  “Now that we’re back in civilization, mind if I turn the radio on?” Meg reached out toward the dial. Soon her loud, booming music stole any further chance Kimmie had to ask her more about their mom. Unfortunately, the noise didn’t manage to drown out her feelings of confusion and fear.

  CHAPTER 39

  Mom had bragged about Meg’s house, but Kimmie had thought she’d been exaggerating until they pulled up into the winding driveway. At one point, Meg had to stop and put in a code that automatically opened a heavy brass gate. To the right was a tiered landscape with shrubs and mulch that looked as fresh as if it had just been poured out of the bag. To the left were tall brick pillars every few feet covered in some kind of lavish ivy.

  “This driveway must take the entire day just to shovel in the winter,” she commented.

  It wasn’t until her sister started to laugh that Kimmie realized Meg and her husband would pay someone to plow any snow that accumulated in front of their house.

  Meg pushed the button on her sun visor that opened an immaculate garage, cleaner than the interior of most people’s houses. A few garden tools with matching pink handles hung on one wall, bikes and tennis equipment on another. A golf bag in the corner was the only item that wasn’t hung or somehow suspended above the perfectly swept concrete floor.

  “Come on in.” Meg stepped out of the car and tilted up her chin, probably waiting for Kimmie’s gushing words of praise. The problem was Kimmie couldn’t even find her voice.

  “Wake up, Pip.” Kimmie wondered if he was going to spend the whole day sleeping. Was it normal for him to be this tired? She shouldn’t overreact. He was going to be fine. Everything was going to be fine.

  She thought about the ornate gate with its automated code. She didn’t even know people had homes like this in Anchorage but was thankful for the extra security it would afford. For the first time since her mom died, she wondered if things were actually going to start getting better.

  “Take off your shoes,” Meg called behind her shoulder as she stepped into a kitchen with massive windows and a vaulted sky roof. She turned around, beaming, but Kimmie still had no idea what she was supposed to say.

  “Wow,” she stammered, which was apparently enough to loosen Meg’s tongue.

  “Dwayne designed this place as an early wedding gift for the two of us. He told me I could either have the skylight in the ceiling or a honeymoon in Greece, and then when I told him I just couldn’t make up my mind, he surprised me and gave me both.” Her giggle was even more grating and airy than usual.

  “Sweet cakes, is that you?” A tan Ken doll lookalike stepped into the kitchen and gave Meg a kiss on the cheek. “I didn’t know you were bringing company over.” He stretched out his hand. “Hi. I’m Dwayne.”

  Kimmie blinked at him, surprised to find that he looked exactly like he did in the wedding picture Mom had hanging on the fridge back home, right down to the last pixel. She was also surprised that he didn’t seem to know who she was.

  “Kimberly,” she told him as she shook his hand.

  “Nice to meet you, Kimberly. It’s always lovely meeting one of my bride’s friends.”

  Kimmie glanced at her sister who swatted him playfully with her handbag. “Bunny-boo, this is my sister.”

  Dwayne’s eyes widened. “You’re Kimmie?”

  Meg laughed, but not convincingly enough to keep Kimmie from picking up on the slightly nervous edge. “I told you she might be coming here to stay for a little while.”

  “Oh, great.” Dwayne’s smile hadn’t changed once since he stepped into the room. Kimmie wondered how he managed without giving his cheeks some massive cramps. He bent down to kiss his wife again, whispering loudly, “She staying in the upstairs guest room or downstairs?”

  “Downstairs,” Meg answered just as conspiratorially.

  Dwayne nodded. “Well, I’m off.”

  “Where you going, baby-bear?” Meg asked with an exaggerated pout.

  “Work, work, work.” He stuck out his finger and pressed in Meg’s petite button nose.

  “Boop!” she responded with a giggle, and after a fair amount of nose-kissing, cooing, and name-calling, he was gone.

  Meg let out one last laugh when he left. “So that was Dwayne.”

  Kimmie hadn’t realized until she saw her sister relax that Meg’s smile had been just as huge and just as unwavering as her husband’s during their entire exchange. Her sister sank down onto one of the tall barstools around a marble island countertop, moaning something about being too early in the day for wine.

  “Can I do anything to help around the house?” Kimmie stared at the immaculate kitchen, wondering how her sister managed to keep herself from getting lost in her own home.

  Her words seemed to sweep away whatever exhaustion cloud had covered her sister. Meg lifted up her head. “No, no, everything’s taken care of here. Come on. Let me show you to your new room.”

  CHAPTER 40

  “Sorry,” Meg said, staring at the sparse bedroom. “I really had no idea what kind of toys a typical three-year-old would play with, and even if I did, I wasn’t sure what would be appropriate for Pip.”

  Kimmie tried not to let her annoyance show. Meg was trying. The two women hadn’t fought since their spat in the car, but every sentence felt strained. Like they both knew this was some kind of an act, but even the stress of keeping up such a complicated pretense was easier to deal with than the bickering and jealousy that had polluted their relationship for years.

  Meg had already given them a tour of the house, explaining which rooms Dwayne considered on and off limits. Kimmie figured if she stuck with the guest room, the attached bathroom, and the kitchen, she’d be perfectly safe. She didn’t even know where Meg and her husband slept.

  Kimmie watched her sister shuffle from one foot to the other and felt a little bit sorry for her. It wasn’t her fault that she was trying so hard to impress them.

  “Any idea how you want to spend the rest of your afternoon?” Meg asked. “We could take Pip out for lunch and go to the park.”

  Kimmie wondered if Meg remembered the playground Mom used to take them to a lifetime ago. “Is there still that playground with the giant jungle gym?”

  Meg frowned. “Which one do you mean? The one on Tudor and Lake Otis?”

  “It was red and green and blue, and it had a swing coming down from the center and games like tic-tac-toe and stuff you could play on the sides.”

  Meg shook her head. “I don’t remember any like that, but I know a nice one with a little foot bridge and a stream. It’s getting cold, but the ducks were still there the last time I drove
by. Does Pip like feeding ducks?”

  Kimmie wished her sister would stop asking questions like that. Didn’t she understand that for his entire life, Pip’s existence had been relegated to his bedroom and the daycare? The only playground he’d ever known was the cheap plastic one at work. It was small, only room for two or three at a time, and other than a two-week period where he decided he loved the swings, Pip had never shown any interest in it at all.

  “Let’s not worry about a park today,” Kimmie decided. Pip didn’t act like his throat hurt, but she figured it was still too soon to take him out for a lot of running around.

  “You sure? I could ask some of my mom friends. They might know of one with a jungle gym. Does he like to climb or something? Maybe we could set up a playdate.”

  Kimmie shook her head. The last thing she wanted to do was sit with dozens of other kids whose obvious developmental advancements just made Pip’s delays seem even more exaggerated. And since he’d just gotten diagnosed with strep, she doubted parents would want him around their kids either.

  “I think that we just need some downtime for a while. Is that all right with you?” She wasn’t used to tiptoeing around her sister’s feelings, but she asked the question gently, uncertain exactly what it was that she was trying to protect Meg from.

  Meg nodded. “That sounds good. Does he have a favorite movie? We’ve got Netflix and Amazon and Hulu if there’s something he wants to stream.”

  “Let me get him settled in for a little bit,” Kimmie said even though she and Pip didn’t have a single bag of personal belongings between them. She’d probably have to ask Meg to take her shopping soon, an excursion her sister would adore and Kimmie despise. But right now, she needed a few minutes alone. A few minutes with her thoughts and with her brother without anyone else staring over her shoulder or worrying about her.

  She offered Meg an unconvincing smile. “It’s going to be all right,” she promised. “I just think Pip needs a little bit of quiet, and then we can decide what to do with the rest of the day.”