Termination Dust

by Alana Terry

  “Okay.” Meg lifted her hand and gave a little wave before shutting the door behind them, and Kimmie spent the next several minutes staring at the flowered wallpaper in silence.

  CHAPTER 41

  Meg came home with Subway sandwiches a little over an hour later.

  “It doesn’t look like that fever’s done much to suppress his appetite, does it?” Meg asked, glancing at Pip.

  Kimmie hadn’t seen her brother eat so much before in a single sitting. Then again, between the rationed meals at the daycare and Chuck’s bread heels and chili leftovers, this may have been the first chance Pip ever had to eat however much he wanted. How sad would it be to learn that all of his delays were simply a symptom of malnourishment? Then again, maybe that would be good news because his body and brain would catch up as soon as he got the calories and nutrients he’d been denied for so long.

  It was nearly impossible for Kimmie to keep up any sort of conversation while they ate. She wanted to ask Meg more about their mom, but she’d have to wait for a time when Pip wasn’t within earshot. Given how long he’d slept in the car, Kimmie doubted he’d take his regular afternoon nap. His schedule, his whole life, was thrown off balance, and she was both surprised and grateful he hadn’t started throwing fits yet. Maybe that was another symptom of the strep. Maybe he was too tired to act up.

  “So, work’s going well for Dwayne?” Kimmie asked after an awkward silence.

  Meg took a bite of her vegan wrap and shrugged. “You’d have to ask him. It’s not like he talks to me about any of it.”

  “I thought you were his assistant or something.”

  Meg shrugged again. “Just because you work for somebody doesn’t mean you know what they’re up to.” Her words were strangely cryptic and her expression somber enough that Kimmie tried to think of some way to change the subject.

  “You sure it’ll be okay for Taylor and me to have dinner here tonight? That won’t be weird since you’ll be out?”

  Meg laughed. “What, are you young enough that you still need a chaperone on a date? Or are you worried about being alone with someone who’s on prescription meds and you don’t know what they are?”

  Kimmie felt herself blush and tried to hide her face behind her sub. “Will you get off his stupid prescription?”

  “Fine. Then you tell me why you all of a sudden want to back out on a date with Alaska’s most eligible trooper.”

  Kimmie rolled her eyes before taking a bite. “I just wanted to make sure it’s not weird for you or anything.”

  “Not at all. I think it’s adorable. You should’ve heard all the questions he was asking about you when you and Pip were with the doctor. I think he really likes you.”

  “You’re just saying that.” Kimmie tried to ignore the heat in her cheeks and the fluttering of her heart.

  “No, I’m not. He asked all kinds of things. If you had a boyfriend, what kind of guys you typically date.”

  “What did you tell him?”

  “The truth, of course. I told him that you only date guys with hard, chiseled jawlines, trim and athletic physiques, and that you once told me there was nothing in the world sexier than a man in uniform.”

  Kimmie stared at her sister, too mortified to speak.

  Meg chuckled and took a sip of her bottled water. “Don’t worry. I didn’t really say all that. Although I might’ve mentioned something about uniforms.”

  Kimmie wasn’t sure if Meg was still joking and decided that it might be better if she let the subject drop.

  “I’m really happy for you,” Meg finally said. “He seems like a decent guy, and he obviously cares about you and Pip. Even if he is on meds.” Kimmie finished her sandwich in silence.

  After lunch, Meg turned on the Pixar movie Cars for Pip. It was one of the ones he had already seen and seemed somewhat interested in at the daycare. Kimmie figured that with everything else going on right now, anything she could do to surround him with the familiar would be beneficial.

  Once he was settled comfortably in the living room, Kimmie and Meg sat at the tall kitchen barstools and started brainstorming a shopping list.

  “I have tons of clothes that you can have, so other than socks and underwear, I think you’ll be set. What about shoes? If you’re still a seven, mine will be a little big for you.”

  Kimmie glanced down at her feet. “I just brought my tennis shoes, and that will be fine for now.” She didn’t want to think about the approaching winter, the fact that before long she’d need snow boots and hats and gloves. She thought about one of mom’s favorite Bible verses. Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. If God could get all of the Alaskan plants and animals and wildlife ready for winter, he could do the same thing for her too.

  With Pip, on the other hand, it would be a little trickier not to worry.

  “My friend Shannon’s got a boy who just turned four, and she’s not planning on having any more kids, so she’s going to bring a few big bags of clothes, but she can’t come until tomorrow. Do you want me to pick him up an outfit or two to wear until then? And what about pajamas?”

  Kimmie didn’t mention that with as difficult as it was to make it to the laundromat, Pip usually wore the same clothes several days in a row.

  “I think he’ll be fine until then, but I guess if you find any dinosaur pajamas, he really liked his pair from back home.” She ignored the tightening in her throat when she thought about everything her brother was forced to leave behind. “They were green,” she added quietly.

  Meg gave her a sympathetic glance, and for a moment Kimmie worried that the dam she’d erected around her emotions since her mom’s death was about to break. She would tell Meg everything, all about those years of torment, the shame and fear that now felt just as much a part of her as her DNA. She wanted to cry, to tell her sister how much she missed Mom, how impossible it was to think that someone so loving could kill herself or end up murdered.

  She wanted to asked Meg what she thought about their time together as children. Was she disappointed that they had drifted so far apart? Did she secretly hope that this time of living under the same roof might be the first step toward healing that giant rift that had come between them?

  Instead, she rattled off some of the toiletries she and Pip might need.

  “Seriously?” Meg looked at the list she’d just written. “That’s all you want me to get? Just toothbrushes, toothpaste, and a hairbrush?”

  Kimmie stared at her lap. If she asked for more, she was afraid of overtaxing her sister’s generosity. If she stuck with this list of the bare necessities, though, Meg might feel insulted as a hostess.

  Maybe sensing Kimmie’s discomfort, Meg smiled. “I guess you’re right. Our skin tones are so close to the same that whatever I use for makeup I’m sure will work for you too. What about snacks? Dwayne and I are so busy we usually eat out or just pick up some takeout on our way home from the office. With Pip not feeling good though, I thought maybe I could get a few snacks and some easy breakfast stuff just to keep on hand. Should I get more yogurt?”

  “Yes, please,” Kimmie answered, once again feeling overwhelmed by this display of opulence, privilege, and generosity.

  “What about for breakfast? You know me. I’m no cook, but I could grab something easy. Does he have a favorite cereal? Does he like granola? Hey.” Meg reached out her hand and gave Kimmie’s shoulder a squeeze. “What’s wrong? Did I say something?”

  Kimmie sniffed and wiped the tears from her eyes.

  “What’s the matter?” Meg asked the question so directly that Kimmie didn’t have time to think up a lie.

  “I don’t know what he likes to eat for breakfast.”

  Her sister stared at her blankly. Of course it wouldn’t make sense to someone like Meg, someone who could eat out or call for delivery or hop in her fancy car and drive to any grocery store or restaurant she wanted. Meg would never know what it was like to be so poor that a s
ingle crust of bread would be split between three people. She and Meg were born and raised by the same woman, but they were from completely different universes. Today was the first time Pip ever had a choice about what he ate, which only made the fact that he couldn’t talk even more heart wrenching.

  Kimmie sniffed. “I’m all right. It’s just been a long day.”

  Meg looked at her quizzically, her pen still hovering over her pad of paper. “So, something simple like Cheerios, maybe?”

  Kimmie sunk her head into her hands, wondering how something as simple as making a shopping list grew to be so draining. “Yeah,” she answered, finding each word laborious to croak out. “Cheerios sound fine.”

  CHAPTER 42

  Kimmie lost track of how many times she’d checked in on Pip in the living room while Meg was out shopping. The moment her sister said goodbye, Kimmie realized she should have asked Meg to pick up a few cheap matchbox cars, but she felt too silly to chase her down in the garage and add one more item to her list.

  Kimmie had no idea what Pip could do here to occupy his time besides watching movies, but they’d think of something. Anchorage wasn’t quite as cold as Glennallen. Maybe she and her brother could spend some time outside. The neighborhood was quiet. Kimmie could get used to living here.

  If she had to.

  Hopefully, the arrangement would be temporary. As soon as Kimmie found a job, she’d start looking for a place of her own. Meg’s house felt more like a museum on display than a home where a kid would be free to run and jump and play. If Pip ever did any of those things.

  She’d felt her brother’s forehead on at least five different occasions in the past hour. How long was Meg going to take grabbing a few snacks and toiletries? Then again, Anchorage wasn’t like Glennallen with its one grocery store. From Meg’s home, it took at least a quarter of an hour just to get off the hillside. Driving to downtown Anchorage would probably take an hour if you ran into traffic.

  But there were advantages to living in a city, advantages that Kimmie was prepared to seize. On the drive to her sister’s, they’d passed two different storefronts with speech therapy signs. Pip would be in good hands. And hopefully Kimmie would find a job soon.

  A door slammed. Kimmie turned around. “Hello?”

  She checked the garage, but her sister wasn’t home yet.

  “Is someone here?” She hurried to the living room, where Pip was wrapped in blankets watching Cars. She checked his forehead once again out of habit. At least his fever was going down. “Do you need anything, Buster?” she asked. “Do you have to use the bathroom?” She glanced around, wondering if he’d wandered off in search of a toilet, but from what she could tell, he hadn’t moved since the last time she checked on him.

  Maybe she was hearing things.

  She eyed the front door. It was still locked. Which was generally a good sign, but only if you weren’t trapped in a house with doors that closed on their own.

  And a floor that creaked like someone was walking right behind her.

  “Dwayne?” Kimmie’s voice was shaky and uncertain. Even if someone had been in the next room, they probably wouldn’t have heard her. She peeked out the front window to see if there were any cars in the driveway. But how could anyone get past that big iron gate?

  Another sound, this one from the level above. Something moved upstairs. Suddenly, Kimmie’s lungs started to seize up. What if it was Chuck? How hard would it be to find Meg’s home address? He knew where Kimmie was, and he was coming after her. That had to be it.

  She shoved her hand into her pants pocket, where Taylor’s business card was crumpled from all the times she’d handled it. She had no idea what kind of long-distance rates Meg got on her landline, but whatever it was, she and Dwayne could afford it. Kimmie hurried to the kitchen, and her fingers shook while she dialed the number.

  “Hello, this is Taylor.” He sounded so casual. So happy.

  She wet her lips and tried to steady her voice. “Hi. It’s Kimmie. I’m at my sister’s.”

  “Oh, yeah.” From his jocular tone, Kimmie could almost see Taylor’s warm smile. “You calling to give me her address? I’m on the road still, so I won’t be able to write it down.”

  Kimmie’s neck tingled with the vague sense she was being watched. She lowered her voice and took the phone closer to the hallway where she could keep an eye on her brother. Pip hadn’t moved. So what was making all that noise?

  “Kimmie? You still there?”

  “Yeah,” she whispered.

  Taylor chuckled. “Good. I thought you had cut out on me for a minute. Reception’s not great around here. Mind if I call you back in a little bit? We’re about an hour still from the airport.”

  “I think someone’s in the house.”

  Taylor paused, and when he spoke his voice was deadly serious. “You’re at your sister’s?”

  “Yeah. She went to get some groceries, but I think I heard a noise upstairs.”

  A staticky noise garbled his words when he asked, “What kind of noise?”

  “A door shutting. Someone making the floor creak.” She held her breath, waiting for Taylor to tell her that all Anchorage mansions creaked, that they all had drafts that could blow doors shut unexpectedly. She wished she could look at him right now, wished she could borrow a little of the strength she always managed to find when he was nearby.

  “Given everything you’ve gone through, you can’t be too careful,” he said, his voice taking on a mechanical quality. “I think you should …” His next words were even more garbled.

  “What?” She gripped the phone, straining to make sense of his words through the static. “Taylor? Are you there?”

  Her sister’s phone beeped in her ear. She’d lost the call.

  CHAPTER 43

  Kimmie stared alternatively at her brother and the phone in her hand. What should she do? She tried calling her sister’s cell, but it went straight to voicemail. In a way, she was glad. She didn’t want Meg to see her freaking out like this.

  Every house made noise. She glanced out the window. The trees at the back of Meg’s property swayed their branches grandly. It was probably just the wind.

  Kimmie glanced around, wondering where she could take Pip if they needed to lock themselves in somewhere. The thought was silly. She was free now. Chuck had no idea where she was. Besides, there were troopers looking for him all around Glennallen. He couldn’t have made it all the way to Anchorage, could he? She doubted his truck would even run that far.

  No, it wasn’t Chuck, and she didn’t need to rush into a closet with Pip and hide. She was an adult who was acting like a child staying home alone for the first time. She marched back to the kitchen, listening at the same spot where she’d heard the door slam earlier. Nothing. The wind or her imagination. That was all. She glanced down the hallway and up the carpeted stairs leading to the second story. What could stop her from checking things out, just to be safe? She was tired of running, tired of hiding, and tired of being scared. Clutching her sister’s phone with one hand, she rummaged through Meg’s drawers with the other until she found a large cutting knife.

  Nobody would catch her unprepared. Because nobody was upstairs. Still, having a weapon gave her a sense of power.

  Not that she’d need it.

  “I’ll be back in a sec,” she told her brother as she passed by the living room. He didn’t glance up from the TV.

  Tiptoeing up the stairs, Kimmie steadied her breath. She was going to confront her fears head-on this time and prove to herself that nobody else could be in this house.

  She’d only been upstairs once, and half the doors had remained shut when Meg gave her the grand tour. Should she open each door one at a time to prove to herself that she was alone?

  A thumping noise from down the hallway. This time Kimmie was certain of it. She stared at the knife in her hand. What good would it do against armed robbers? What good would it do against Chuck and his rifle?<
br />
  A whispered voice. More than one person?

  She still held the phone, but if she turned it on the beeping noise might alert the intruders. She had to get back down to Pip. Had to get him to safety.

  Kimmie strained her ears, expecting almost anything — gunfire, Chuck’s angry curses. What she didn’t expect was a loud, shrill giggle.

  She froze in the hallway, unable to move her legs as the far door opened and her brother-in-law poked his head out. “Kimmie?”

  She tried to hide the phone and the knife behind her back but was certain he saw them both. Heat rushed so fast up to her face she felt dizzy. “I didn’t know you were home,” was all she managed to stammer.

  “Just for a minute. I had to grab something I forgot.” He cocked his head to the side. “Are you okay?”

  Kimmie’s hands were sweating so much she was afraid she might drop the knife. “I’m fine. I just heard a noise and got a little startled. That’s all.”

  He smiled at her, but his expression did nothing to dull her sense of fear mingled with mortification.

  Kimmie thought she heard another noise coming from the back room, but she wasn’t about to step forward and investigate. She turned to head back downstairs when Dwayne called after her. “Hey, Kimmie?”

  He’d plastered on that same fake smile he’d worn when they first met. She didn’t know why the look should disgust her so much, but it did.

  “Yeah?” Why couldn’t he leave her to die of humiliation in peace?

  “Meg’s always getting on me for leaving things at home, so I’d love it if you didn’t mention I was here.” He winked. “Sorry for scaring you.”

  She turned away as his door clicked back in place to the sound of a stifled giggle.

  CHAPTER 44

  Kimmie didn’t hear when or if Dwayne left, but the house was quiet when Cars ended, and she figured whatever business he’d wanted to get done at home was accomplished. Pip was restless, wandering from room to room. Kimmie followed him mindlessly. What else was there for her to do?