Unconditional

by Tyler, Q. B.

  “God, I love you so much,” she whimpers just as she lets me fall from between her lips. She puts her hands on my stomach for leverage before trying to move from my face. I grip her ass again, keeping her in place and she giggles when I place one final kiss on her sex. She climbs off of my face and sits between my spread legs, her cheeks flushed, her hair disheveled and her lips red and swollen.

  “You’re so beautiful,” I tell her.

  “That was so fun.” Her eyes are shining with lust and love and adoration and it makes me want to have my hands on her. She must sense that because she crawls up my body and snuggles against my chest before placing a kiss over my heart. I wrap my arms around her and move her so that she’s lying next to me and I’m spooning her from behind. I rub my hand down her arm and kiss the back of her shoulder. “I’ll hate not having this every night.”

  I drag my nose down her cheek and neck, inhaling her scent and knowing that I’ll probably hate not having her here even more than she’ll hate being gone.

  What if Aria is right, and the space between us causes her to rethink this? What if she realizes that I’m a fucked up man for touching her the way that I have?

  The thought makes my blood run cold that after all of this she may end up hating me.

  I LET MY HEAD FALL all the way back, the pounding in my temples giving me a mind-numbing migraine that I know will only be exacerbated the second I step inside. I snuck out of bed just as the sun began to rise over Christmas day, hoping that I’d be back before Maddie wakes up, but now I wish I had woken her up to let her calm my nerves. I slide my key into the door and I’m immediately met with the smell of cinnamon, just like every Christmas. Every year, my mother spends the morning baking every dessert under the sun and sending them to various homeless shelters, soup kitchens, and churches that hold Christmas dinner for anyone without a place to go. So, I’m not surprised to see my mother in the kitchen with Christmas music blaring.

  “Hey Mom, Merry Christmas,” I tell her and she spins around from cutting up her apples for her cinnamon apple strudel. Wearing her usual Christmas sweater with a picture of Rudolph and matching apron, she’s the picture of festive.

  “Cal?” She looks at her watch and then up at me. “I wasn’t expecting you this early! Merry Christmas, honey!” She pulls me in and reaches up on her tiptoes to hug me, allowing me to dwarf her small frame. “Is Maddie with you?” She peeks around me and frowns when she doesn’t see the person that is never more than a few steps behind me when I come over.

  “No no, she’s still at home sleeping. We’ll be back later today, I just wanted to come alone first…” I rub the back of my neck and sit at the kitchen table. She pushes her glasses to the top of her head and narrows her eyes.

  “What’s going on with you, huh? You look like you’ve got something on your mind. Talk to me, Cal Michael. I didn’t know you were coming this early or I would have had breakfast ready.” She opens the refrigerator and I notice it’s packed with food that’s already been prepared and some that hasn’t. “I can whip you up some eggs and bacon really quick?”

  “Mom, I’m fine.” I rub my head. “But do you have any coffee made?”

  “There should be enough for another cup.” She grabs a mug and pours it for me before pouring a drop of milk, just how we both take it. “Here. Now talk.”

  I let out a breath. “You know I wouldn’t ask this if it wasn’t…really important.”

  “You can ask me anything, Son. Small things or big things. It doesn’t have to be really important for me to help.” Her eyes are soft and warm to match the kind heart she has inside, despite the fact that she spent the earlier half of her life having it broken.

  “Do you think Maddie can stay here with you…just until she graduates?” She blinks a few times and sits back in her chair, crossing her arms. She doesn’t say anything and I wonder if she’s waiting for me to continue. “Anything she needs I’ll take care of—” I start and she waves me off.

  “Hush, Cal. I’m more than capable of taking care of her and I love spending time with her. I’m just curious as to what brought this on exactly.” She raises an eyebrow at me and I know that look. I already know the truth, so don’t bother lying to me. “You two have a fight?”

  “No, Mom.” Maddie and I rarely fought, we rarely yelled, and the few times we did I felt like shit over it and usually ended up apologizing an hour later, and that’s if she didn’t come to me first.

  She drums her fingertips against the wood. “Okay…do you want me to guess?”

  So, she knows, but how? “Did you talk to Henry?”

  Her eyebrows raise. “Your brother knows?”

  “Knows what?” Okay, so maybe she doesn’t?

  “You tell me.”

  “Oh, for the love of God, Maddie and I are…” I clear my throat, preparing to speak the words when she beats me to it.

  “Screwing.”

  I almost spit out my coffee in my haste to swallow it down quickly. “Mom!”

  She puts a hand over her heart. “What? Oh, I’m sorry is that not accurate?”

  I grit my teeth and screw my eyes together. “It’s accurate. How did you know?”

  “First things first, when did that start, and don’t lie to me.” Her voice is even, not angry or judgmental or upset. But calm and rational, unlike Henry and Aria.

  “Not long if that’s what you’re thinking. A few days ago.”

  She nods. “Well, that’s a relief. That girl has been in love with you for so long; I’m surprised it took this long for it to happen. She thinks you hung the moon and the stars and everything else in the sky.” She rubs under eyes.

  “Mom…” I trail off. “Please don’t hate me.” I expect to see the angry look Henry had or even the devastated look Aria had, but her eyes are filled with compassion and love and understanding.

  “Do you love her?”

  “More than I thought was possible…I already loved her so much but…it’s just so different now. I never expected to get here, I—”

  “I did.” She tells me honestly with a ghost of a smile playing on her lips. “I saw it a mile away.”

  “When?”

  She lets out a breath. “I don’t know. Small things here and there. The way your eyes search for her the second you walk in a room. The way you gravitate towards her. She’s always been affectionate with everyone, but with you, she was always more so. You always went above and beyond for her but as she got older…you still always went the extra mile. I wasn’t sure how or when it would change into this, but it seemed inevitable.”

  I let out a breath as I listen to my mother paint a vivid picture of me and Maddie. “Aria thinks it’ll ruin her. That I’ll break her.”

  “Aria needs to mind her business and focus on the problems in her relationship.” She narrows her gaze. “She’s always got an opinion on everything but that’s another story. As far as Maddie goes, you couldn’t break that girl if you tried.”

  “I think she means if things don’t work out…we can’t go back to the way things were. Maddie would hate me if I hurt her and it would devastate her not to have me in her life.”

  “I would hate you if you hurt her. You planning to hurt my girl? Because you wouldn’t be here if you two were just experimenting with her new legal status.”

  “I’m not planning on it…but things happen. What if she decides she doesn’t want this? What if she ends it? It would still make it hard for us to be close again.”

  “True. And that’s a very real risk. But you’ve already crossed that line, so there’s no going back at this point, am I right? But if she loves you as much as I know she always has, I don’t think she’ll ever want to be away from you, honey.”

  “I don’t want to hurt Maddie. I don’t want to ruin her. And Aria thinks that us being together after everything we’ve been through…given our history, will ruin her.”

  “Maddie isn’t your daughter, Cal. This isn’t illegal, sure some will take issue with it, b
ut to hell with them. You deserve to be happy, and I’ve never seen you light up the way you do except when you’re looking at Maddie.”

  “I love her…more than my own life. That hasn’t changed. But I want…I want it all. So, if she needs space to make sure that this is what she wants, then I’ll give it to her.”

  “Did she ask for space?”

  “No. She’s not happy about it, but Aria has her rattled. Aria wanted her to move in with her and Henry but with the way they’re both acting, I don’t want her to have to deal with that.”

  “So, Henry knows but Aria…doesn’t?”

  “As far as I know, and Henry took a swing at me, so needless to say he’s pissed.”

  “He’s always been such a hothead.” She rolls her eyes. “Must be why he said he wasn’t sure if he was coming today.”

  Henry knows Christmas means so much to my mother. For him to just not come, means he’s probably not sure that he’ll be able to keep his temper in check. “He’s not? Are you okay with that?”

  “Your brother makes a point to disrespect the man I’ve chosen to spend my life with at every turn. If he wants to stay home, he can. I don’t want drama on Christmas.” She points at me as if to say, if he shows up, keep it together. “Anyway, when is my partner in crime moving in?”

  I groan and rub my forehead, the headache forming again at the thought of all the trouble Maddie and my mother could get into. “Listen, Thelma, keep Louise out of trouble. Do not let her drink.”

  “Hey, you have your way of parenting and I have mine.” She shrugs before giving me a pointed look.

  When I get home, Maddie is still sleeping, which isn’t surprising. If she woke up and realized I wasn’t home, she would have called me immediately. I stand in the doorway of my bedroom and watch her sleep for I don’t know how long. She’s on her stomach, her hair splayed out over my pillow, her naked body warm and covered by blankets. I pull my shoes, coat, and most of my clothes off before I climb into bed with her. I trace the features of her face with my fingertip and she sighs in her sleep which sends a spark to my dick that has already taken notice of her naked body. I turn her on her back and lower the blanket to reveal her perfect, taut body. I trail my lips up her skin, taking time to adequately kiss her pussy and her nipples before pressing a kiss to her mouth.

  Somewhere around me sliding my tongue through her folds she began to squirm so by the time I get to her mouth she’s almost awake.

  “Mmmm, Cal,” she mumbles. “Touch me.” She sighs and I know she’s fighting the last few moments of sleep, on the precipice of dreams and reality when her eyes flutter open. “Hey.”

  “Good morning, beautiful.” I rub my nose against hers before placing a kiss on it. “Merry Christmas.” I hold up the small box in front of her eyes that I’d retrieved from one of my safes. “This is for you.” Her eyes light up and she sits up, wrapping the sheet around her naked chest. Her eyes dart to mine and I shake my head hearing her unspoken question. “It’s not what you’re thinking.”

  She runs her finger over the red box and traces the script on the top. “Is it a ring?” Her mouth parts and I can see her pink tongue peeking through her teeth.

  “It’s a ring.” I nod with a smile. Some things never change. Maddie always asked what something was before she opened it. She got one guess and if she guessed right, I had to be honest.

  She opens the box slowly and stares at the ring that I’ve had for a few weeks. Her eyes well up with tears before she blinks them back. Her breaths are labored and ragged and I see the goosebumps popping up all over her skin. “It’s so pretty.”

  It’s a white gold band that forms an infinity symbol in the center with diamonds. The inside has our initials with the words “I’ll love you forever” on the inside. Simple and to the point as those four words encompass everything I’ve ever felt for Madeline Shaw.

  “It’s engraved,” I tell her as I slip the ring out of the box. She reads the words aloud and then she’s lunging for me, wrapping her naked body around my half-dressed one.

  “I love you so much…forever,” she whispers into my neck. She pulls back and I grab her hand, sliding the ring onto her right finger before kissing it.

  “I said it’s not what you’re thinking because asking you to marry me—while it’s what I want,” her breath hitches and for a second I think stars explode in her eyes, “it’s not time. You still need to graduate and go to college and—”

  “You’re going to make me graduate college before you ask me?” She frowns.

  Her words make my heart race at the thought of making her mine. “I don’t know yet, but we just started this and it would be easy to get caught up in the sexiness of all of it and get married to tie you to me forever, but I want to make sure we are making the right decisions at the right time. I’ve always put you and your well-being first and that will never change.”

  “So, is this…a promise ring?”

  “Yes.”

  “A promise to what?”

  “To love you forever, Maddie. No matter what happens between us.”

  She frowns and I cock my head to the side. “Don’t let Aria get in your head, Cal. Don’t think you have to push me away and give me space because you think it’s the only way for me to figure out what I want. If you think it’s best for us, then I’ll move out. Just…just promise I can come back?”

  “About that, Maddie…” I trail off. She tenses in my arms and her grip tightens on me. “I talked to Margie.”

  She nods. “Okay…”

  “You’ll be okay with staying there?”

  “For how long?”

  “End of the school year?”

  “And then I can come back?”

  Her eyes are a combination of hurt, worry, and fear. She thinks I wouldn’t come back for her. She thinks my feelings will change. “Yes, of course.”

  “You promise?”

  I nod, remembering that the rest of her college acceptance letters should be trickling in soon. She’s already been accepted to several out of state and I know it’s a conversation we’ll need to have. I don’t want our relationship to be a factor in where she decides to go; I want her to spread her wings and explore the world around her without fear.

  But I’d be lying if the thought of going with her didn’t cross my mind. Realistically, if we continued down this road, we couldn’t stay here. Everyone knows the story of how Maddie and I met and I wouldn’t want to put her through people’s scrutiny for the rest of her life.

  I’d want to start somewhere new with a clean slate. Her and me, and hopefully, if we get there, all the babies she lets me put inside her. “I promise.”

  “You’ve never broken a promise to me before.”

  I grip her jaw and her lips purse. “Then you shouldn’t be worried.”

  “Will we still get to see each other?”

  I pepper kisses down her slender neck, trying to calm the nerves flowing through her. “Of course, baby. Nothing can keep me away from you. Is that what you’re worried about? That we won’t see each other? My mother is thrilled to have you, but now even more because she knows she’ll see me more.” I chuckle and she pulls away from my mouth and looks at me with wide eyes.

  “You…told Margie?”

  “She guessed.” I shrug.

  They widen further and covers her mouth with her hand. “She GUESSED?!”

  “Apparently, we’ve been pretty obvious for a while now.”

  “Holy shit.” She drops her head on my shoulder and takes a deep breath.

  “For what it’s worth, she’s pretty on board.”

  “I always knew Margie was the coolest of the Grayson bunch.”

  I pinch her side. “I resent that.”

  “So, what’s going to happen today?”

  “I’m not sure. I think Henry is bailing.”

  “And Aria?”

  “I don’t know, but Margie knows that Aria’s still in the dark about everything.”

  “When do I hav
e to go?”

  “When you go back to school maybe?”

  Her eyes light up. “So, I can be with you for New Year’s?”

  “Yes. What would you like to do?”

  She bites her lip. “You.”

  I throw my head back and let out a laugh. “I think we can make that happen.”

  “I’m serious, I need to have you as many times as possible before you ship me off.”

  “I’m not shipping you off. Don’t be so dramatic. Do you need me to come tuck you in every night?”

  “Oh.” She raises her eyebrows and rubs against me. “Yes, please.”

  We pull up to my mom’s and I reach for Maddie’s hand and rub my lips over them. “Give me a kiss before we go in.”

  She casts a shy glance at the house before turning back to me. She leans across the console and presents her lips to me. I cup her face and kiss her senseless, before peppering kisses all over her face. She sighs and stares up at me like I hold the answers to all life’s questions. “That better not be the last time you plant one on me today.”

  “Maddie…”

  “Find a time.”

  I roll my eyes at her bossiness and get out of the car, helping her out, and grabbing the gifts we brought for my family.

  The second we walk through the door my mother is squeezing Maddie so hard I’m actually wondering if she can breathe, stroking her back and whispering something to her. I can’t hear what she’s saying but I see Maddie nod her head in response. She pulls away and cups her face before kissing her forehead and shooing her towards the kitchen. She points at me and narrows her eyes. “No funny business, Cal.” She circles her finger at me. “I’ve got my eyes on you.”