Excuse Me

by Rosanne J Thomas

  There is a chance you will receive job offers you choose not to accept. Handle such situations with the same gratitude, grace, and tact. You need not get too specific, such as saying you did not like someone you had met or that you thought the company was subpar. If pressed, just say the fit wasn’t quite right for you. And always keep your eyes on the future. In her 2015 article in Business Insider, Jacquelyn Smith says, “The business world, your industry and market are all small. Your hiring manager can likely reappear in your career. So put your best foot forward, especially when you refuse a position.”9

  There is always the remote possibility that despite your very best efforts, you did not win the position. Clearly, this is a difficult situation, especially if you were one of the finalists. But, believe it or not, the way in which you handle this “rejection” may actually end up working in your favor. First, try to see all the good that came of this process. You met new people, got to hone your interview skills, and learned more about the requirements for the position. And to get as far as you did, you obviously impressed a lot of people. Now it’s time to cement their good impressions.

  Start by thanking everyone who interviewed you. Let them know that you would still be very interested in joining the organization should another opportunity arise. Ask for feedback about why they selected another candidate and how you could possibly improve your technical or interview skills. Candid feedback is not always easy to get, but a recruiter may be willing to do this. Ask if you can stay in touch from time to time, and assuming the answer is yes, do so by forwarding relevant articles, offering congratulations for good news, and recommending candidates who you think could help them.

  All of this may come back to help you sooner than you think. If you came in second place, and the job is either not accepted or does not work out for the first-place candidate, you will be the first person they call. Interviewers will be far more likely to recommend a gracious candidate to their networks than one who seemed to sulk, or worse, badmouthed a prospective employer because she did not get the job. Remember, your brand is always on display. How you handle disappointment tells others a great deal about your character, professionalism, resilience, and maturity.

  The Generational Challenge

  The interview seems to be going really well for recent grad Alex. He thinks he may be offered the job, as the hiring manager is now describing the next steps. With a big smile, the interviewer asks Alex if he has any questions. “Just one,” says Alex. “What’s your lead time for drug testing?” That’s when the smile froze.

  Most job search challenges are faced equally by candidates of all ages. But there are some generation-specific challenges with which candidates might need to contend, challenges often fueled by stereotypes. For example, millennials may have to combat the notion that they all feel “entitled,” and baby boomers that they are all “over the hill.” Here is some advice on what the generations can do to challenge any preconceived notions or age-related speed bumps they may encounter.

  Digital Natives

  Millennials, you are not in charge—yet. But you soon will be. And as long as you alone create the code, don’t you own the marketplace? Perhaps . . . if tech skills were all one needed to succeed. But this is not now nor will it ever be the case. Even if it were the case, millennials would not have a corner on technical expertise for much longer. Generation Z is coming up fast. The oldest of this cohort of true digital natives are now around 20 years of age. As they begin to enter the workplace, technical skills will no longer be the exclusive domain of millennials, and social skills will once again become the distinguishing commodity.

  Fairly or unfairly, Gen Y has been painted as a socially clueless cohort. In his article for Monster.com, “How to Help Millennials Fill the Soft Skills Gap,” John Rossheim wrote, “Gen Y employees, raised to believe that hard skills matter most, often fall short on soft skills.” He adds, “The soft skill gaps most likely to trip up millennials include written and oral communications, social skills and the ability to engage and motivate, business etiquette, and professionalism.”10 In her article “Just Look Me in the Eye Already,” Sue Shellenbarger of the Wall Street Journal puts an even finer point on the challenges this group faces. “Eye contact, so vital an element of respect among preceding generations, seems conspicuously missing from millennials.”11

  As a millennial job candidate, you can overcome these preconceptions by realizing that interviewers are on the lookout for such stereotypical behavior. They’ve also done additional homework. They know that technology is part of your DNA. They know of the social conscience you embody as a group, the flexible work-life balance you seek, the feedback you crave, the aspirations you have for fast and continuous development and advancement, the casual work environment you prefer, and yes, your interest in food, food, and more food! All of these are things you do not need to tell them. Your fellow Gen Ys will ask about job perks, gym memberships, office decor allowances, bringing their dogs to work, and using company equipment for their new start-ups. Those are their issues. Just be sure they are not yours.

  Why shouldn’t candidates announce their clear wishes from the get-go? Because employers who are seriously interested in them will not only be willing to share the many benefits their companies offer, they will be shouting these benefits from the rooftops. Applicants of all ages need to guard against thinking that they are more important to their prospective employers than the employers are to them. It is only after a job offer is made that a candidate is in any position of strength.

  The good news for millennials is that they do not have to do much to tip the employment scales in their favor. If their education and experience match their prospective employers’ needs, brushing up on such social skills such as small talk, eye contact, handshakes, and turning devices off may be all that’s required to get the jobs.

  Digital Immigrants

  Older job applicants face their share of challenges in the interview process as well, starting with who interviews them. Anyone in the job market who is not a millennial is almost certainly going to be interviewed by one at some point during the process. This means trying to impress a potential boss some 20 or 30 years one’s junior.

  Applicants interviewing with millennials will want to keep in mind the defining characteristics of this generation. Applicants should speak to what millennials value most: work-life integration, teamwork, and continuous learning. They should offer positive feedback to interviewers on their questions and insights and keep focus squarely on the present and future, not on the past.

  Albert Einstein once said, “Learning is not a product of schooling but the lifelong attempt to acquire it.” Older applicants know they need to stay current with technology, but wonder how they can when it moves at the speed of light. The answer is through education, in whatever form they can find it. Community college and online courses, YouTube videos, paid seminars, free classes, and reverse mentoring with younger colleagues, children, grandchildren, and neighbors can all provide excellent low-cost or no-cost sources of up-to-the-minute information. Older workers should not be afraid to ask for help. They have so much of value to offer in return—college referral letters, key introductions, and free room and board among them!

  Despite proof to the contrary, older workers suffer from misconceptions about their energy, stamina, productivity, and adaptability. To keep age from being your defining characteristic, Carmine P. Gibaldi, Professor of Organizational Behavior and Management at St. John’s University and Harvard University, advises working late one or two nights each week, letting coworkers know you exercise, keeping current with your clothing, and staying positive. He also recommends not talking about how things used to be done, not advertising your lack of tech savvy, and not complaining about your bad back!12 Older candidates and employees also want to make sure that 21st century techspeak and skills are part of their repertoire.

  REMEMBER

  Master the use of technology for job searches and interviews.


  Learn the interview requirements of a particular job or field.

  Develop and nurture networks.

  Stay organized and follow up meticulously.

  chapter 3

  professional presence

  Getting It Right

  “Your manners are always under examination, and by committees little suspected, awarding or denying you very high prizes when you least think of it.”

  —RALPH WALDO EMERSON

  Gen Xer Joe doesn’t know when his alarm clock buzzes for the second time how much his job will be on the line later that morning. Now, with his heart pounding wildly, he is in full panic mode. Joe’s new district manager is visiting this morning and will be addressing rumors about a possible company downsizing. Joe knows he had better get to the office before the DM does.

  Joe grabs the pile of clothes lying on the floor, the same ones he had worn the day before, and after a quick sniff test, wildly pulls them on. He brushes his teeth and drags a comb through his hair before he is out the door.

  Joe has a lot of time to make up and his foot is heavy on the gas. Weaving in and out of traffic, he gets pulled over. Politely accepting his speeding ticket, Joe is now desperate to get to work. At the company parking lot, he barely misses the car stopped at the front entrance. He blares his horn as a passenger leaves the car and slowly walks to the entrance. Joe finally parks and rushes into the building. He dashes up the stairs into the meeting room disheveled, breathless, dripping in sweat, and two minutes late.

  His boss and coworkers stare at him in disbelief. And then, the man at the far end of the conference table stands, and Joe and the district manager lock eyes in mutual recognition. Here is the passenger of the car stopped at the entrance, the very same car at which Joe had blared his horn. And he looks very unhappy. Joe sinks into the nearest seat, head bowed, and prepares for the worst.

  If you’ve ever wondered if you have a personal brand, wonder no more. You do. We all do. Where we live, what we drive, with whom we associate, what we wear, how we communicate both in person and virtually, our work habits, and our leisure activities combine to create an indelible image and powerful message. Who we are and what we value, in essence, define our personal brands. Your personal brand precedes you and stays long after you have left. Says Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon, “Your brand is what people say about you when you are not in the room.”

  The Right Brand

  It has been almost a month to the day since Karen, a 33-year-old CPA at a major accounting firm, has taken her “voluntary” Professional Presence training. Indisputably brilliant at her job, Karen has rapidly worked her way up from staff auditor to tax manager and is on track to become one of the firm’s youngest partners. That is, if she is able to convince the senior partners that she can project the image they have so carefully developed for their firm.

  Karen knows she can be a little rough around the edges. Impatient and demanding, she is a perfectionist. After all, time is money—her clients’ and the firm’s—and she’s not going to waste any of it. Still, her salty language, severe attire, and unsmiling face intimidate the junior staff and even put off some of the partners, as well. But this is who she is, Karen thinks, an accountant, not a cruise director. Besides, a “lipstick” approach to changing her image will never work.

  Karen had no choice but to take the training if she wanted to become partner—which she desperately did. But she was skeptical when the consultant said that little tweaks could actually make big differences. If Karen was willing to make a few changes, she said, she might be pleasantly surprised at how powerful the effects could be. They would meet again in a month to assess her progress.

  Karen figured she had nothing to lose. She made an appointment with a personal shopper and a hair salon to update her wardrobe and hairstyle. She visited a cosmetics counter and was astonished at what a difference a little well-applied makeup made. At work, Karen began greeting colleagues as they passed by and was surprised when her greetings were invariably returned. Rather than her usual all-business approach, she engaged her staff in light conversations about their weekend plans and outside interests, and truly listened to their responses. She even invited some coworkers to coffee—something she’d never done in the past—and began to forge some new relationships. She was amazed at how receptive people were. But the biggest shock for Karen was that she had begun to receive compliments about her appearance and attitude—that was a first!

  Karen’s confidence was sky-high, and she had to acknowledge her new approach wasn’t hurting her team’s productivity at all—in fact, it actually seemed to be helping it. Karen looked forward to her follow-up meeting with the consultant, eager to share her successes and to ask for additional tips. All of a sudden, her partnership dream seemed very much within her grasp.

  The concept of brands is not new. First introduced in 1937 by Napoleon Hill in his book Think and Grow Rich,1 personal branding was again brought to the fore in 1981 by Al Ries and Jack Trout in their book Positioning: The Battle for Your Mind.2 It was later popularized by management guru Tom Peters in his 1997 article in Fast Company, “A Brand Called You.”3

  Professional image and reputation have always been important. But there is a new sense of urgency in having a positive brand, due to the proliferation of social media. In the past, the implications of a person’s brand, whether good or bad, were largely contained. Only specific family, work, and community audiences were privy to them. Today, the possible ramifications of a negative brand are enormous because everything is out there for the whole world to see.

  Occasionally, personal branding suffers from a negative connotation. When less than truthful self-promotion reveals itself, a letdown inevitably occurs. Conversely, while openness is to be valued where matters of character are concerned, sharing too much information can work against you. Today’s workplace mantra is “transparency and authenticity,” but the fact is, true civility requires good judgment and a measure of nondisclosure.

  It is easier than ever to inflict permanent damage to our brands. We would be wise to heed the advice of Guru Sai Baba, who said, “Before you speak, ask yourself: is it kind, is it necessary, is it true, does it improve on the silence?” If what we are about to say does not meet these criteria, it may be better left unsaid.

  Dan Schawbel, author of Personal Branding Book, says personal branding is “The process by which individuals differentiate themselves and stand out from a crowd by identifying their unique value proposition, whether professional or personal, and then leveraging it across platforms with a consistent message to achieve a specific goal.”4 The benefits of having a strong personal brand, he says, include the ability to demand a premium price, a higher salary, and enhanced visibility within professional communities.

  One’s in-person persona and online activities combine to create a brand—a brand that can easily be compromised. Online, a brand can be undermined by one’s failure to include a professional photograph, poor judgment with posts, relentless self-promoting, and over-sharing. In person, it can be marred by behaviors at work, on public transportation, in restaurants, on elevators, while waiting in line, and while walking on the sidewalk or into buildings—virtually anyplace one is seen or heard.

  Perceptions of people are also fueled by stereotypes. If one wishes to overcome the preconceived notions that millennials are flighty narcissists and baby boomers are cranky has-beens, one will need to build an authentic, compelling personal brand that flies in the face of these stereotypes. To accomplish this, deliberation is key, and it begins with self-reflection. Brian Lawrence, a career development specialist at Saint Louis University, says that a personal brand is first and foremost personal. “Your brand should not be a character you create but instead should be a representation of what employers can expect when you are hired.”5 Once you determine who you are and what you want to convey, you can align all aspects of your personal and professional personas and begin to clearly and consistently communicate your brand.

 
; Sometimes rebranding is in order. One of the most famous comeback stories is that of Steve Jobs. He founded Apple in 1976, got kicked out of the company in 1985, and 12 years later was rehired. Henry Blodget, cofounder and former CEO of the business website businessinsider.com, wrote, “During his time in the wilderness—the 12 years he spent away from the company that became his life’s work—Steve learned the skills and discipline that he needed to lead Apple’s resurrection. Steven wasn’t born with these skills, he developed them.”6 Bill Gates and Richard Branson, among others, also faced significant setbacks in their careers. What is encouraging is that no matter how great the challenge or how long it takes, rebranding is not only possible, it may land one in a far better position than before.

  The newly hired are at an advantage because they are in the process of making their first impressions. They can turn these good impressions into good brands. Tenured employees, on the other hand, or those who have made less than positive first impressions, may need to do some rebranding. This involves first convincing themselves, and then others, that they are not only capable of making successful changes, but also would thrive in doing so.

  SUCCESSFUL REBRANDING

  Take seriously all feedback received. Make personal improvements with an eye toward the future.

  Determine how current skills align with future job requirements. Learn necessary skills for a new job before pursuing it. Find mentors to lend support and give advice.

  Realize rebranding takes time. Be persistent and confident. Eventually, others will change their minds about you and your capabilities.