Catch Me When I Fall

by Jackson, A. L.

  My teeth clamped down on my lip to stop the blush. “You’re just trying to sucker me in.” It was soft and full of ribbing.

  He rolled to his side, taking me with him, tucking my body close to his. “Is it working?”

  “I’m pretty sure you could ask me to do anything right about now, and I’d be game.”

  He laughed. “You should never say things like that to a man. I could come up with some pretty ingenious things.”

  “You act like that scares me.”

  A grumble rumbled around below my ear, the man’s heart beating an erratic thrum, thrum, thrum.

  “Reckless girl,” he murmured at the top of my head.

  “I’m just looking for what I want.”

  “And what’s that? What is it you really want?”

  I flinched a little, letting my thoughts wander. “You know, I was supposed to get married.”

  I wondered if he knew anything of my past. If he’d researched who we were or if he’d simply been given a task.

  He froze, and I lifted my head so I could meet the hatred that disfigured his expression.

  Wow.

  Not what I was expecting.

  “No,” he grated. “I didn’t know that. You’re not . . .” He trailed off like he couldn’t bring himself to say it, though his attention was darting to the bare spot on my ring finger.

  “No,” I rushed on a pulse of disgust. “He cheated on me.”

  It hit the air like a hollow arrow.

  Vacant space in the middle.

  It’s the way he’d left me feeling.

  Abandoned and alone.

  “Fucking moron.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Want me to kill him?” It was all a mischievous gleam, Royce going for light when I could see his muscles twitching in restraint.

  “Um . . . I think that would be a very bad idea. I think I like you outside of jail, thank you very much.”

  Low laughter rumbled from him, the words filled with an undercurrent that I couldn’t quite sort out. “It’d be worth it. Fighting for what matters is always worth it. No matter the cost or the consequence.”

  I let my fingertips play across the horrid face that screamed out from the valley on his abdomen, wondering what it meant, a little terrified to know the answer. Wondering just what lengths this man might go to. “Well, believe me, he’s not worth it. Not in the least.”

  “Have half a mind to break him limb by limb just for ever touching you.”

  “Jealous?” I teased.

  “Very.” He didn’t seem to be joking.

  “I’m just . . . I’m just sad that I trusted him. That I’d planned on starting a family with him.”

  Grief throbbed from deep within, and I pushed it down, not ready to share all the ugly details with him, not sure I even trusted myself with them right then.

  “Sad that he let me down so far when I needed him most,” I continued, the words cracking as they were expelled. “That’s what hurts more than anything else.”

  Royce pulled me close and exhaled into my hair, his warmth spreading over me. “I hate him for hurting you. Hate any bastard who would touch something so precious in the wrong way.” He held me close, his arms so strong, the churn of his heart stronger. “Kills me, sweet girl. Kills me.”

  He buried his nose in my hair, inhaled deep. “What are you doing to me?”

  I wrapped my arms around him and held on tight. “I hope it’s the same thing that you’re doin’ to me.”

  He sighed. “It’s never going to work, Emily. We are nothing but a conflict of interest.”

  Emotion gripped me by the throat, everything thick and heavy and tremoring, and I just gave him everything I had.

  Knowing I didn’t have anything to lose. This moment might be fleeting, but it was ours.

  “I’m so lonely, Royce. So lonely, and for the first time in so long you make me feel like maybe I don’t have to be. Like maybe there might be someone who fits me, after all. Like you just said, I want to fight for what matters most. No matter the cost or the consequence.”

  There I went.

  Cutting myself open wide.

  Offering this man things I’d never offered anyone else.

  Hoping when all of it came gushing out, he might be strong enough to hold it. He might be the only one who could.

  “Damn it, Emily. You’re not alone. You’re not.”

  He wrapped me tight, and I pushed out a shuddering sigh.

  “Sleep, sweet girl. Sleep.”

  And for the first night in months, I did.

  Fourteen

  Emily

  Through hazy morning light, I stood at the nightstand next to the bed and gazed down at the man who was sleeping facedown, covers tossed aside, the strength of his back on display.

  Wide, wide shoulders tapering down to his narrow waist, half of his firm ass peeking out from below the sheets.

  My stomach tumbled.

  God, he was gorgeous.

  Last night had been close to a miracle. I’d slept for hours wrapped up in his warmth.

  Safe.

  Secure.

  Somehow, I’d managed to only let my heart get broken a little bit when I’d heard him whimpering Anna in his sleep just as the day was dawning. I’d peppered a bunch of kisses to that spot on his chest, wishing I could be the one to hold some of his pain the way he was holding mine.

  When he’d seemed to settle, I’d slipped out of his bed with the faint strains of a melody playing in my mind. In them had been the intonation of lyrics, and I’d grabbed a piece of scratch paper and scribbled them out.

  My life’s a spiral

  But I think it’s you who sent me spinnin’

  Now we’re reeling out of control

  I tucked the ripped sheet under his watch on the nightstand.

  I gasped when a hand reached out and snatched me by the wrist, and Royce flipped over onto his back and dragged me on top of him.

  Giggles burst free.

  All mixed up with the desire that boomed.

  His hot body against mine.

  Chest bare.

  His cock eager and hard where it was pressing at my belly.

  Oh my, was this ever the best way to start off the day.

  “Mornin’,” he rumbled against my forehead.

  “Good mornin’,” I whispered back.

  Wrapping those massive arms around me, he heaved out a sound of relief. “Where do you think you’re sneaking off to?”

  I rested one side of my face on the hammering going down in his chest. “Bus pulls out in two hours. I need to get a shower before we leave.”

  He angled up so he could press his nose into my neck. “I think I like you just fine smelling like me.”

  Another giggle.

  Electricity skimmed my skin. Pinpricks of growing need.

  If I could have, I thought I might have stayed there forever.

  “Well, you might like it just fine, but I’m pretty sure the rest of the band might have something else to say about it.”

  He leaned back, hitting me with a grin.

  Affection bloomed in my spirit.

  I thought there was a chance I liked this bad boy far too much.

  “Not sure I give a shit what anyone has to say about us.” His gaze was tender. Playful, even.

  My heart expanded.

  It was the first time he was even talking like this.

  Like . . . like maybe we were a possibility.

  “I don’t so much, either.”

  Then his fingers were winding in my hair, and he was kissing me.

  Deeply.

  Hands exploring. Palming my bottom, urging me closer, riding up my back until he was framing my face in his firm, sure hold. Angling me just where he wanted me.

  My heart stampeded, pressing full at my chest, my stomach coiled in exquisite threads that I was pretty sure were stitching me together.

  Keeping me from splintering apart in his hands.

  Breaking th
e kiss, Royce dropped back to the pillow, pants ripping from his chest and something that looked like a satisfied smirk riding his delicious mouth.

  I peeked up at him, biting my swollen lip. “I really need to go.” It was loaded with reluctance.

  “That’s a terrible idea,” he murmured.

  “We’ll be on the bus soon. You don’t have to wait that long.”

  He sighed a rough, needy sound, softness mixed in the middle of it. “Is it wrong I’m afraid this moment is going to cease to exist? That I’m going to be stepping back into an old reality the second you disappear back over that wall?”

  “And why would you think that?”

  “Because I can’t have you.”

  I reached up and traced the scruff of his jaw. “You already do.”

  A frown pulled across his brow, and I kissed it, trying to ease the pressure.

  I got it.

  He was supposed to be representing us. Bringing us into the Mylton Records fold. Right then, I was his job. But after last night, I was certain our hearts rose so far above all of that. We could figure it out.

  “I think . . . I think I might be ready.” The words creaked with uncertainty when I released them.

  His scowl came at me with full force. “For what?”

  “To sign.” My tongue darted out to wet my lips. “I’m tired of letting my past hold me back from what I want. Tired of letting the people who’ve hurt me be the rulers of my life.”

  Worry flew through his expression, remorse and regret. “And are you sure this is what you want? To sign this record deal?”

  Why was he looking at me as if maybe he thought I shouldn’t take the jump?

  “You’re the one who told me I’m a star. That I’m meant for this.”

  Confusion raced through my senses, and he tightened his hold on my face. “You are. And I want you to be sure you’re teaming with the right people to get you there.”

  “I want you on my side,” I whispered close to his lips.

  Strain blew out on a sigh, and he curled an arm around my waist. “I am. I want everything for you. Everything that you want in this life. You deserve it all.”

  I was pretty sure it was too soon to tell him that was fast becoming him.

  Giving in, he loosened his hold, mischief moving across his face. “Go on, gorgeous girl. You need to get back to your room before Melanie comes looking for you, and that is a shitstorm I can do without.”

  “She’s not so bad.”

  He arched a disbelieving brow. “I think the girl carries around a machete for the sole purpose of protecting your virtue. Every time she walks into the room, my dick shrivels up, sure it’s in mortal danger.”

  More laughter, everything feeling so easy. “She likes you . . . I think you’re okay, big man. That pretty cock of yours is just fine.”

  A teasing grimace paraded across his face, and oh man, did I like this side of him, too. “Uh . . . Mells Bells earned her name from somewhere. Think Rhys might be missing a vital part or two.” A defined brow arched. “And did you call my cock pretty?”

  This time, my laughter rolled, and my head was spinning with a rush of dizziness.

  Like streaks of sunlight blazing through the breaks in the trees.

  Disorienting and beautiful.

  “If it fits,” I muttered, doing my best to flirt and not trip into self-consciousness.

  He growled and rocked his hips into mine, the hot, hard length of him pressing at my belly. “I’ll show you where it fits.” Need poured through me like a waterfall, and Royce chuckled low. “Go to your room before I keep you here all day.”

  “I like that idea better.”

  He went soft, touching my cheek. “If you really want me, Precious? You need to wait. Wait until you’re sure. Until you really know who I am. That I won’t be a mistake.” The last was stern. Laced with bitterness.

  I pushed my mouth up under his jaw, inhaling his scent, cedar and smoke and a vestige of me. “I don’t think that’s possible,” I murmured, “I don’t think I could regret experiencing a single thing with you.”

  Tearing myself from him, I eased off the bed and forced myself to head for his balcony door.

  Before I stepped out, I glanced back, my sight full of that sinful, mysterious man lying across his bed with a flare of morning light striking across his body.

  Exquisite.

  Devastating.

  Before I ran back to him, I forced myself to step out into the rising day, shuffling on my bare feet back over to our shared wall.

  I hoisted myself up so I could slide over it. The second my feet touched down on the other side, Royce was there faster than I could process it, leaning over the wall, a big hand splayed around the back of my head to tug me in for a mind-bending kiss.

  That’s what being kissed by Royce Reilly felt like.

  As if I’d been altered.

  No longer the same.

  Everything shifted around inside, shuffled in an outright disorder to settle into a newness where everything fit.

  I pulled back with a smile, heat on my cheeks and hope in my belly. “I’ll see you in a little bit.”

  “I can’t wait,” he said, watching me edge back across my balcony to the sliding door.

  Finally, I tore myself away, spinning on my heel and racing into my room. I didn’t even take the time to look at my phone that still sat on the nightstand connected to the charger. I went right for the shower, turning it to hot, letting steam fill the room as I lifted my nightgown over my head.

  For a second, I pressed it to my nose, relishing in his distinct smell that lingered there, wondering what direction we were heading.

  I stepped under the spray, knowing wherever it was, I couldn’t wait to get there.

  * * *

  Thirty minutes later, I was showered and dressed. I didn’t wait for Melanie to pick out my outfit.

  I was feeling too good and too free and too right, so I pulled on my favorite white dress and slipped on some strappy wedge heels.

  I dried my hair and applied a small amount of makeup. I leaned away from my reflection to crane my ear when my phone started to go off with a string of messages from the other room.

  Then it dinged with more.

  I sped up a little to finish getting ready. Once I did, I moved into the main room, which was a junior suite this time, just like Royce’s next door. A couch and table were in the front portion and the bed was in the back without a wall to separate them.

  Going for the nightstand, I grabbed my phone and swiped across the screen to find the group text.

  Richard: Did everyone hear?

  Rhys: No, man. What’s up?

  Leif: ???

  Richard: Got some good fucking news.

  Rhys: Yeah?

  Rhys: Let’s hear it.

  Rhys: Don’t leave us hanging, asshole.

  Richard: Everyone meet in my room in two.

  By that time, five minutes had already passed, and there was a battering at my door before I heard a card sliding into the lock and the door unlatching. Melanie pushed her way through without an invitation.

  “Oh my god,” she gushed as she flew inside.

  Holding my phone in my hand, I turned my attention to her. “What’s going on? Richard said there’s good news.”

  She skidded to a stop in the middle of the room. My best friend vibrated with excitement. “Richard got a call from Karl Fitzgerald this morning. He’s procured a spot for Carolina George to perform at the ACB Awards this weekend if you sign! Oh my god . . . the ACB Awards!” she shrieked. “Can you believe it?! I guess something happened with one of the bands that were supposed to be performing, Fitzgerald called, and boom. He’s making good on his promises to make y’all superstars.”

  The ACB Awards were the premiere country music awards. Marrying country and pop and rock. It gave the Super Bowl audience a run for its money.

  She took a surging step toward me and grabbed me by both hands, giving them a fierce tug. �
��This is big, Em. So big. Everything y’all have been dreamin’ of. Can you imagine it? Up on that stage. God, I have to find you something amazin’ to wear. Oh crap. Crap, crap, crap. We don’t have a lot of time.”

  Her voice went faraway while anxiety clawed beneath the surface of my skin. Like little fire ants going on a crusade. It was muddled by the rush of euphoria that hit.

  I felt as if I were being pulled in two different directions.

  Split down the middle.

  But Mel was right. This was big. Something that had seemed like an impossibility. For years, it had been so far out of reach that it had felt like a fantasy.

  Now, the only thing I needed to do was jump.

  The one thing standing in my way was finally getting the courage to stand up and hold that bastard accountable.

  But what would that do to Richard?

  A tremor of fear rolled down my spine.

  And what would putting it out in the open do to me?

  But I couldn’t go on allowing that man to exist as if nothing had happened.

  Dread and belief staged a tug-of-war inside of me.

  I could do this.

  I could do this for the band.

  I could do this for Royce.

  Most of all, I could do this for me.

  The door banged open.

  Rhys and Leif barged in. Rhys tossed his arms into the air as if he were calling a goal.

  “Holy shit, baby girl! Did you hear?” He was all burly grins and country twang and dollar signs in his eyes, which was just fine, considering the guy managed to do it without a lick of pretension.

  He rushed me, wrapped his arms around my waist, and spun me around.

  Joy bounded from him.

  “We did it! Fuck yeah!” he shouted. “We did it!”

  Then he froze, hugging me too tight. I thought he just then remembered that I’d thrown a wrench into our plans about three months ago.

  Stalling.