Chasing the Stars

by Malorie Blackman

  Once I was back on the bridge, I activated the ship-wide announcement system.

  ‘This is Olivia Sindall, acting captain of Earth Vessel Aidan,’ I stated, my eyes on Nathan as I spoke. ‘After much thought, I have reached a decision. This ship will travel to Mendela Prime, before resuming its course for Earth. Those who wish to disembark at Mendela Prime will be more than welcome to do so. Afterwards, if any of you wish to continue on to Earth with me, that will also be acceptable. That is all.’

  Nathan inhaled sharply. Moments ticked by before he gave the briefest of nods in acknowledgement of what I’d just said. Neither of us said a word.

  Stupid. Stupid.

  I was probably making the biggest mistake of my life.

  At this rate, would I ever make it home?

  ‘Are you sure, Vee?’ asked the commander. She had a light in her eyes I hadn’t seen there before. It took a moment to recognize it for what it was – the light of hope.

  ‘No,’ I replied. ‘But I’m going to do it anyway.’

  ‘Vee, have you thought this through?’ Aidan wasn’t happy, to say the least. ‘We need to get home.’

  ‘And we will, Aidan,’ I replied. ‘It’ll just take a while longer than we’d originally planned, that’s all.’

  ‘A while? By the most direct route and at maximum speed, it will take us twelve Sol months just to get to Mendela Prime, and then another eighteen months to make our way from there to Earth,’ said Aidan. ‘I can give you the exact amount of time to the second if you’d prefer.’

  Like I hadn’t already figured that out.

  ‘Aidan, we’re going to Mendela Prime,’ I said. ‘Could you plot a new course please?’

  ‘Vee, you need to get home,’ Aidan said urgently.

  ‘And I will,’ I replied, forcing a smile. ‘In the meantime, could you follow my orders please?’

  Aidan shook his head, but he turned back to his console to do as I’d asked and plot our new heading. I glanced around. Darren was giving me a strange stare. He looked like he had something to say but then he turned abruptly and left the bridge. I sighed inwardly. Nothing I did would ever make that man forgive me for the loss of his family, but I wasn’t seeking his forgiveness.

  Maybe I was pursuing my own.

  The hope of seeing Earth again within a Sol year had kept me going for so long. I would just have to pray I was strong enough to put my own hopes on hold for a while. Could I really do this? Delay my return home by so many months? Oh God! Was this yet another attempt on my part to make up for what had happened on board the Aidan three years ago? Probably. Plus, deep down I still felt partially responsible for the lives lost on Barros 5. Logically, rationally, I told myself that there was nothing more I could’ve done. But logic was no match for my feelings on the subject. I had to do this, help the survivors. I just had to. No doubt they would all want to be put off on Mendela Prime. It would be a long lonely journey back to Earth by myself. A journey I wasn’t sure I’d be able to embark on again. Would I be strong enough to be alone with just Aidan for another eighteen months after we left Mendela Prime? I very much doubted it.

  Loneliness was an insidious killer.

  ‘Vee, I want you to know that we all appreciate this,’ said the commander. ‘And believe me, we will do whatever it takes to fully assist you. I give you my word.’

  ‘I appreciate that.’ I smiled hesitantly.

  The commander smiled back. A tentative truce had been established.

  The rest of the day passed uneventfully, which was fine with me. A lot of the ship’s work that had been part of my daily routine, I now found lifted off my shoulders and I could sit up straighter because of it. The parts of the ship like the science lab and the astrophysics lab which hadn’t been used in months, and in some cases years, were once again fully operational. I was slowly getting used to a ship that had different smells, sounds and sights to what I’d grown accustomed to over the last three years. Having a crew again made me realize just how lonely I really had been. It was truly wonderful to feel the ship was beginning to live again.

  Halfway through my shift and I admit I was already exhausted. Talking, listening, just being around people took far more physical and mental energy than I’d anticipated. I did my usual rounds of each deck of the ship as I always did once during each shift and was pleasantly surprised by the cautious smiles and greetings of those I met along the way.

  On my way back to the bridge, a woman’s voice from behind me halted me in my tracks.

  ‘Captain Sindall?’

  I turned, half expecting to see my mum and someone calling her. I still wasn’t used to hearing others call me ‘Captain’, I guess because I wasn’t used to thinking of myself that way. A tall brunette woman with beautiful brown eyes walked up to me hand-in-hand with a slightly shorter blond man.

  ‘Captain Sindall, I’m Mei and this is my partner Saul.’

  Saul’s grasp of Mei’s hand tightened almost imperceptibly.

  Aw!

  ‘Hi,’ I said, searching for something to say next. ‘Welcome on board.’

  ‘We just wanted to say thank you,’ said Saul.

  ‘For rescuing us,’ added Mei.

  ‘And for agreeing to take us to Mendela Prime,’ said Saul. ‘We know going there wasn’t in your plans.’

  ‘But we finally feel safe.’

  ‘And free.’

  ‘It feels like we’re on our way home, even though we’ve never been there,’ said Mei. ‘Doesn’t it, Saul?’

  Saul and Mei exchanged a smile which whispered to all those watching that they didn’t give a damn who knew how they felt about each other. I felt like a voyeur.

  ‘Well, I hope you have a comfortable journey whilst on board,’ I said.

  ‘We’ve both been assigned to the astrophysics lab,’ said Mei, her enthusiasm flowing over me. ‘That’s how we met, at AeriaTech Research.’

  I’d heard of AeriaTech. That was one of the biggest and richest companies on Earth with outlets on every continent. I wondered what had happened to exile both of them to Callisto, but much as I wanted to know, I wasn’t about to ask. I’d learned from Nathan that you didn’t ask that. People might volunteer the information but it wasn’t done to ask.

  Saul let go of Mei’s hand to grasp one of mine in both of his. ‘We owe you our lives and our happiness. Thank you.’

  I slowly but surely drew back my hand. ‘You’re welcome.’

  With one last genuinely happy smile, the two of them turned and headed back the way they had come, still hand-in-hand. I smiled as I watched their departure. Their happiness was infectious. I could only hope it’d spread around the ship. Now all that was required was for the Mazon to stay away whilst we travelled through their territory.

  Back on the bridge, Nathan and Anjuli were at the navigation panel with Aidan. Anjuli and Nathan were deep in conversation but Aidan wasn’t saying much. I’d have to have a word with my brother. He was coming across as aloof. He needed to fix that. Nathan looked up to smile at me before resuming his study of the screen before him. Sam and Hedda were at the tactical panels. Commander Linedecker sat in the captain’s chair, but the moment I stepped onto the bridge she got up and, after a brief nod at me, headed over to the environmental panels to the right. I’d changed the access settings to allow the crew full access to all of the equipment on board. We were all going to be together for a long while, so a show of trust had to begin somewhere.

  Once I’d read all the daily reports, I surreptitiously watched Nathan and Anjuli. I wanted to speak to Nathan in private later to learn more about his life, his hopes, his dreams. I sensed he could teach me a lot – if we ever got the chance to be alone. One of the dilemmas of having so many people on board. Conversation on the bridge was quietly animated. I was with people again.

  Part of a team.

  And I was quietly loving it.

  26

  I hesitated outside the medical bay doors. Something was wrong with me and I needed Doctor
Liana’s help but I hated doctors. Let’s face it, I hated asking for help of any kind, but I wasn’t getting any better. Once she told me what was wrong, then maybe I could fix it.

  Pulling myself together, I entered the medi bay. I saw Doctor Liana at once. She was at her desk, reading something on her tablet. She only had one patient. Dooli lay on a bed, fast asleep, the monitor set in the wall above her bed displaying all kinds of information which meant nothing to me.

  As I walked towards her, Doctor Liana looked over, then sat up. ‘Nathan? What brings you to my neck of the woods?’ she asked.

  ‘Doctor Liana, I think I’m coming down with something?’ I said reluctantly.

  ‘Oh yes?’ The doctor stood. ‘Hop up onto one of the beds and let’s take a look.’

  I did as directed, a growing sense of trepidation washing over me. Being with Doctor Liana always brought back unpleasant memories. The doctor came over to me, put her hand on my forehead, then took my pulse the old-fashioned way by holding two fingers against my inner wrist. I frowned at her as she removed her MMS, or mobile medical scanner, from her belt.

  ‘So what makes you think you’re coming down with something?’

  I really didn’t want to be here. The last time I’d had any dealings with Doctor Liana had been when she’d operated on my leg to attach my prosthetic foot.

  Not my favourite memory.

  And she’d had to patch me up a couple of times before that too.

  More harsh memories.

  ‘Well?’ the doctor prompted.

  ‘Well, I keep breaking out in hot sweats, my body seems to flash hot and cold at odd moments and there’s something wrong with my appetite,’ I replied unwillingly. I couldn’t do this. ‘Look. You know what? Coming here was a mistake. I’m sure it’s nothing. I’ll sort it.’

  I was already getting up off the bed, but the doctor pushed me back onto it. ‘You can stay put until I’ve fully scanned you,’ said Doctor Liana.

  With a sigh, I stayed put.

  ‘Any other symptoms?’

  ‘I’m having trouble sleeping and concentrating.’

  ‘Anything else?’

  Yes, but none I cared to mention out loud, even to the doctor. ‘No, I don’t think so.’

  Doctor Liana gave me a studied look as she continued to scan slowly up and down my body. She shook her head. ‘My scanner says there’s nothing wrong with you. In fact, you’re in rude health.’

  ‘Which is exactly what I told you a minute ago,’ I pointed out. ‘I’m sorry to have wasted your time.’

  I tried to get off the bed but once again the doctor pushed me back down. ‘Not so fast,’ she said. ‘Just because nothing is coming up on my scanner doesn’t mean that there isn’t something going on with you.’

  ‘Like what? I thought scanners could pick up ninety-nine per cent of ailments and illnesses.’

  ‘When do the majority of these symptoms of yours happen? Any particular time of the day or night?’

  ‘Nope.’

  ‘When you’re doing a particular activity?’

  I shook my head.

  ‘After you’ve eaten any particular type of food? Could it be the onset of an allergy?’

  I continued to shake my head.

  ‘In the presence of any particular person?’

  The head shaking stopped. I stared at the doctor. ‘Pardon?’ I mumbled.

  ‘Ah!’ Doctor Liana said with satisfaction.

  What the . . .? ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’ A deep frown cut a trench between my eyebrows.

  ‘Of course you don’t.’ Doctor Liana winked at me. ‘Now in my expert opinion, if these symptoms have only recently started, you’re either menopausal – which I’m inclined to rule out at this stage – or someone on board is causing your palpitations.’

  ‘Seriously? That’s the best explanation you’ve got? I thought you were a doctor, not a quack,’ I told her frostily.

  Ignoring my comment, the doctor continued her speculations, a big-ass smile on her face. ‘Now I’m assuming it’s not one of us settlers who’s turning you on. After all, you’ve been around us for years. There are only two new people in the equation – Aidan and Olivia. So which one of them is heating you up? Tell all. Enquiring minds want to know.’ Doctor Liana grinned at me, delighted by her ridiculous deductions. She was way off base.

  ‘Well, thanks for your time, doctor.’ This time I jumped off the bed and there was nothing in the universe that could’ve got me back onto it.

  ‘My advice?’ Doctor Liana called after me as I made my way out of the medi bay. ‘Figure out which of the two of them is doing it for you if you haven’t already and then do something about it.’

  I left the medi bay with the doctor’s laughter ringing in my ears.

  27

  The following morning, I woke up feeling more at peace with myself and the galaxy than I’d felt in a long, long time. After a shower, I headed onto the bridge with a renewed sense of purpose. I could do this. Getting to know the new crew and helping them get to Mendela Prime was the right thing to do, even though my brother might believe otherwise. I’d worry about what would happen after we reached Mendela Prime, when we reached that particular bridge.

  I could do this.

  I spent the final hour of my shift going through the profiles of the new crew, memorising faces, names and assignments. The whole shift was pretty uneventful and I was happy for it to stay that way, but ten minutes before the shift ended, the ship’s alert sounded, making me jump. I hated that din. It was cacophonous and deafening and never boded well.

  ‘What?’ I asked Aidan, my tone terse. ‘The Mazon?’

  ‘No, not the Mazon,’ said Aidan, his expression puzzled. ‘Three of the refugees – Mei DuLac, Jaxon Ramsey and Saul Turner – are in one of the cargo hold airlocks and the evacuation protocol has been activated from in there.’

  The full 3-D images of the three he’d just named revolved slowly before us. I recognized all of them. Two of them I’d spoken to only the day before.

  Dahell?

  ‘One of them activated the evacuation sequence?’ I asked, astounded.

  Aidan studied his console. ‘As far as I can tell.’

  ‘Why would they do that? Does one or all of them have a death wish? Override it. Shut it down,’ I said.

  ‘I can’t. It’s been isolated and jammed. I can’t shut it down from here.’

  I stared at my brother. ‘How long?’

  ‘One minute, thirty-three seconds.’

  Oh my God!

  ‘What’s going on?’ said the commander.

  Damn it!

  I was already running for the door. ‘Three of your friends are in the cargo hold airlock and they’ve activated the evacuation sequence. If it’s not shut down, they’re going to be jettisoned out into space. Aidan, stay here and do what you can to override it.’

  ‘I’ll stay here too and help,’ Hedda called after us.

  I raced along the corridor towards the lift. Nathan was at my side. Sam, Anjuli and the commander were running behind us. As we entered the lift, I said, ‘Cargo hold. Emergency mode.’

  Emergency mode ensured the lift went straight to the requested destination instead of stopping to pick up others who might have requested the lift. No one spoke during the seconds it took to get from the upper deck to the lower deck. As soon as the lift door opened, I ran out into the cargo hold. I saw them immediately. My heart leaped into my mouth, then plunged down to my boots. On the other side of the cargo hold, three of the colonists – Mei, Jaxon and Saul – were inside the airlock which separated the hold from the vast space beyond, and were banging frantically on the polyglass panel of the door. The warning indicator above the door indicated they had twenty-five seconds left before the outer hull door opened and counting down. The airlock was in evacuation mode, something that was only supposed to happen when the ship was in imminent danger or on my explicit instructions. The warning siren screamed throughout the ship. Ins
ide the echo-chamber of the cargo hold, it was ear-splitting. I sprinted across the cargo bay, moving like the devil himself was chasing me. The absolute terror on the faces of the three colonists spurred me on to run even faster.

  They were in trouble.

  Mei, Saul and Jaxon began to float off the ground as the gravity unit inside the airlock ceased to function. I raced, my legs and arms pumping, but I was still several metres away from the airlock controls. The others were right behind me, sprinting across the hold. A warning alert from above the inner airlock door rang out, its continuous whine clashing dissonantly with the siren sounding throughout the ship. I was ten metres away when the outer hull door began to slowly open, revealing the vast inky blackness beyond.

  ‘Aidan, abort the airlock outer door opening. Keep the nano-field in place. Aidan, do you hear me?’ I cried out. ‘And shut off the damned siren.’

  The din sounding throughout the ship ceased. Only the constant warning wail from above the airlock itself could now be heard in the cargo hold.

  ‘Why did you do it? Why did you activate the evacuation sequence?’ I shouted.

  ‘We didn’t!’ Mei cried out, grabbing for the guard rail which ran waist high around the perimeter of the airlock.

  ‘We came in here to talk. Only to talk,’ said Jaxon. ‘The door came down.’

  ‘The alarm started.’

  ‘What’s happening?’

  They were all talking over each other in a panicked rush to be heard.

  ‘Hit the abort button,’ I urged, pointing to where it was situated next to the door on their side.

  ‘I have,’ said Jaxon, smashing his palm against it again and again. ‘It’s not working.’

  ‘Help us!’ Mei gasped.

  ‘Do s-something.’

  ‘Get us out . . .’

  The three were free floating, only changing direction when they bumped into each other. The outer hull door slid slowly but inexorably higher.

  ‘Aidan, damn it. Don’t let the nano-field drop. Close the hull door!’ I shouted.