Dungeons and Noobs

by Ryan Rimmel

  “Well, that’s good to hear. That big fireplace of yours gives the room a real cozy vibe,” I said, deciding I’d given Mar enough time to notice me. I started toward the door. When I got my hand on the knob, I turned back to the men. Raising my voice, I said, “Yell if you need me for anything.”

  Blots threw a small ball at Mar’s head. He snatched it out of the air right before it impacted him. “I would appreciate it if you would stop. . .”

  “Hi, Mar,” I greeted brightly.

  “Mr. Mayor, I see you finally got here,” the clerk grumped. “It’s about time,” he muttered under his breath.

  “Yup,” I replied, stepping back toward his desk.

  “I have some buildings you need to approve,” Mar said.

  “Your Administration skill is up to Initiate. I thought you could handle those,” I said, bringing up the town menu.

  “These aren’t simple houses. The Militia has requested that you upgrade the barracks,” countered Mar. Mar had significantly advanced his skills in his time as our clerk. He was capable of building a large selection of structures on his own with a good degree of skill. In the past, he had the ability to build some minor structures, but he tended to be less comfortable making those kinds of decisions. Very recently, as he leveled up, Mar had become much more comfortable as a building approver. My little annoying bookkeeper was turning into a big annoying bookkeeper.

  “So, what are my choices?” I asked, looking through the options. It was obvious that I didn’t need to ask him, but asking annoyed Mar. In my book, that was enough of a reason to do it.

  Mar frowned, began to say something, and then thought better of it. He scrunched up his forehead and cleared his throat. “Well, Zorlando has requested two structures be built. Fenris has requested another building in place of one of Zorlando’s suggestions.

  At least there was one building that was agreed upon by both parties. We only had enough War Points to add two useful buildings, though. Additionally, we weren’t earning enough War Points to make another building feasible anytime soon. I was pretty certain I would have to go to war at the Eastern Gate Fortress to earn enough points for more structures.

  When I assigned our army to the Barracks, it had begun accumulating War Points. Despite all the battles we had participated in, we had only earned a scant 67 War Points. Now, I was seeing a flashing indicator on the town menu indicating that the Windfall Militia had leveled up.

  ● Dashing Dandies have earned War Points. Would you like to increase the Dashing Dandies to a Tier 2 army?

  “Wait, the name of our army is the Dashing Dandies?” I asked, examining the unit name.

  “Of course! That’s the name they fought under in their most significant battle,” replied Shart.

  “Can I change it?” I groaned.

  “If you want to spend War Points,” answered Shart.

  I did not. This was my fault. I should have named the army myself. Instead, I’d left the name as the default one, Windfall Militia. Then, Dalton had outmaneuvered me by assigning his preferred name.

  “Dalton outsmarted you, Dum Dum,” grinned Shart. “How’s that make ya feel?”

  Groaning again, I selected “Yes” on the prompt and watched as our militia soldiers base stats increased. Training in the militia originally granted a base of 50 Hit Points. Now, that base number increased to 100. Reviewing the new numbers, I noticed that the Barracks was highlighted.

  Selecting it, I saw an upgrade option was available. I obviously wanted that. The upgrade was processed instantly, because our Barracks was already a Tier 4 structure.

  “That was anticlimactic,” I said.

  “Were you expecting it to start glowing golden while kicking all the soldiers out or something?” asked Shart.

  “Kind of,” I said.

  “It must be so disappointing being you,” replied the demon.

  Next, I glanced through the build menu and whistled. The last time I’d looked at the build menu for the Barracks, everything had been greyed out. Now. there were a variety of choices. I selected the Specialist Room, noticing that it required a good chunk of our 67 War Points.

  ● Specialists Room: This room expands training opportunities for your army, allowing special officers, like Combat Medics, to be trained. 30 Build Points, 30 War Points, 10 lumber, 5 cloth, 5 metal, 2 glass

  Considering we only had one qualified healer in town, having a devoted Combat Medic would be super useful. It would have probably kept some of our prior casualties alive. I built the Specialist Room, spending the precious War Points like a wastrel.

  War Points were essentially Experience Points for an army. However, they behaved a bit differently than normal Experience or Skill Points. I brought up the menu and looked over the Dashing Dandies again. In short, War Points were attached to the military unit in question, and they were separate from my War Leader skill. It was roughly analogous to the skill of the general versus the skill of the troops.

  “It's because they are Professionals, not adventurers,” said Shart, using my preferred method of communication. “They don’t earn ANY Experience Points, so the system has to track their slow, dim-witted progress some other way.”

  To add a layer of complexity, instead of being able to directly apply those points to the unit, Ordinal had you apply the points to their base of operations. In this case, that was our Barracks. You could upgrade the Barracks, adding in new structures and features that would ultimately benefit the troops after they trained. Without a base of operations, you couldn’t even form a proper army for them to gain any War Points. This really meant that true armies were the stuff of towns.

  Mercenary units, like Zorlando’s Golden Company, followed different rules. I wasn’t training a mercenary company, so I wasn’t totally clear on what was involved.

  The way armies were trained explained some of the gaps in my War Leader talent. I could make the soldiers charge faster, for example, but I couldn’t really increase anyone’s Hit Points. I also could not directly augment any of their other stats in a permanent context. My Rally War Leader skill granted temporary Hit Points, for example, but nothing that was long-lasting. That was because the War Leader talent dealt more with how the soldiers were used, rather than how they were trained.

  The Barracks was what Ordinal classified as a Compound. Compounds were several buildings put together for a common effect. Most of the structures in town were simple, stand-alone buildings. Only a few could even be built as Compounds. According to Shart, when a Compound was first constructed, the builder had a few choices for which buildings to place where. This would ultimately decide how the Compound functioned. Our Barracks started off with a Long Hall, which was where the soldiers slept. As it looked like a classic military barracks, that’s what I tended to call the entire Compound. We also had several training yards, which improved the military's training quality. The yards allowed for the training of a certain number of sergeants, too. The last time I reviewed the build menu, there were multiple types of training fields that served a variety of roles. However, for the moment, we were maxed out on the allowed number of yards we could have.

  That was for later pondering, though. Now that the Dashing Dandies had increased to Tier 2, I had some new building options available. When we’d begun repairing the Barracks, there had been a number of other structures in the Compound. They had all been burnt down or destroyed. I really had no idea how the Barracks was initially constructed, so that left me guessing as to what the optimum configuration was. To put it another way, I was able to build it as I saw fit.

  Which meant that I was going to have to defer to either Zorlando or Fenris.

  ● *Zorlando* Officer’s Mess: This room is a separate compartment for officers. Hearty meals grant officers +20 Hit Points. Upgrading this room further increases this bonus.

  ● *Fenris* Map Room: This room enhances your War Room by tracking maps for old battles, allowing you to replay combats. As the Map Room is upgraded, you can simul
ate tactics against your previous foes. Grants a +25% bonus to War Leader experience.

  Zorlando’s room seemed to help him personally, while Fenris’ choice seemed to help everyone. That was such a no-brainer that I actually thought about it for a moment.

  “Shart, what qualifies as an officer?” I mentally asked

  “Why are you bothering me with your droll nonsense?” retorted the demon. “I was taking a nap.”

  “You need to sleep?” I asked. I had been operating on the assumption that sleeping was like eating for the demon. I thought he didn’t require it.

  “No, Dum Dum, I don’t need to sleep. I don’t need to do anything that you dullards do. I enjoy resting. It takes my mind off this horrible place,” Shart snidely explained.

  “You have been in a mood lately,” I said, still considering my room options.

  “Well, that’s what happens when you get stuck with a dirty, shortsighted, nonsensical human for as long as I have been,” snapped the demon. Sighing, he continued, “What was your question again? Officers? Anyone with the War Leader skill or a specialty role counts as an officer.”

  “So, Zorlando is an officer?” I asked.

  “Yes, and so are all your sergeants, along with anyone else that has a specialty role, like your scouts,” explained the demon.

  “So, it sounds like you are saying we have quite a few officers,” I stated.

  “Yes,” answered Shart. “You meat bags require a lot of leadership to accomplish very little.”

  “That means that an Officer’s Mess would benefit a great number of people.”

  “Yes, Dum Dum,” he answered in a tone that could never be described as patient. “As long as an Officer’s Mess exists, they will get the bonus it provides.”

  “Wait, are you saying the officers don’t even have to eat there every day?,” I asked.

  “Just while they train. That allows them to keep the bonus as long as they are a member of the army,” replied Shart. “Lots of training buildings are like that. Why are you bothering me again? Was there a particular reason, or are you just being lazy and stupid?”

  I paused. That meant Zorlando’s choice affected quite a few more people than just Zorlando. There were around twenty other people in the Dashing Dandies that counted as officers. If each of them got 20 Hit Points, that was a pretty decent bonus for the regular militia people. The Map Room, on the other hand, was better for people who had the War Leader skill. That was limited to pretty much just adventurers and Zorlando. I dropped out of menu time.

  “Why didn’t Fenris and Zorlando agree on an Officer’s Mess?” I asked Mar. The man looked absolutely flummoxed at my question. Badgelor snorted.

  “Because, adventurer’s don’t see eye to eye with the common folk,” answered the badger.

  “I thought we got along pretty well,” I said to Badgelor, considering my interactions with everyone.

  “Oh, here it isn’t too bad, actually,” said the badger. “When you leave Windfall and visit some of the other towns, you are going to find that adventurers are treated quite a bit better than your average person.”

  I considered that for a moment. Since I’d founded Windfall, everyone had deferred to me. I had believed that was because I was the mayor. Now, I wondered if being an adventurer might have had a bit to do with how I was treated. When I was in Narwal, I had gotten preferential treatment, despite the refugee crisis going on there. Furthermore. I doubted Lord Dookie would have been as respectful to me if I’d been some regular mayor. I must have been treated better because I was an adventurer. .

  “That is because they are better people,” said Shart unapologetically. “An adventurer is simply more valuable than even a skilled Professional.”

  Professionals, or Professioned, were what people like Jarra the Healer were called. They had practiced extensively and had developed a series of skills into something truly useful. Also, a low-level Cleric walking through town could do Jarra’s job as an afterthought.

  That was actually true with others, as well. SueLeeta had been practicing her Healing skills and was nearly Jarra’s equal, despite spending almost no time on it. The only reason Jarra was the definitive town Healer was because of her Alchemy skill. It allowed her to brew large amounts of potions at a time. SueLeeta claimed those were simply too time consuming to bother with.

  Which was a lie. I had been brewing up poisons in my workshop, and those were made just like potions. Potions took only a few minutes to complete. Heck, I’d distilled some of the leftover Demon Blood I’d gotten from Shart into something truly devastating. I was now nearly a Journeyman in Alchemy myself, despite only a casual effort.

  The American in me recoiled hard at separating people into social classes like that, but it was true. To put it in perspective, on Ordinal I learned skills at a truly awe-inspiring rate. If I had this kind of progression on Earth, I could pick literally any profession and outstrip people with thousands of hours of training. What it took them years to accomplish, I would do in a matter of weeks. Assuming, of course, that I really went all in on it.

  Both Mar and Blots were looking at me, and I realized what they were wondering. Was I going to help the adventurers or the regular folks? I didn’t have enough War Points to build a third room and make everyone happy. For now, I was stuck with one or the other.

  We didn’t need the help. They did.

  I selected the Officer’s Mess.

  ● Administration has increased to Journeyman. Remote Administration is now possible.

  You can now fully administer your town from any safe location.

  Blots actually rolled his eyes. Mar looked happy as he began allocating resources.

  “What’s your problem?” I quietly asked Blots.

  “Just figured you’d go for the Map Room,” answered Blots. “It's better for adventurers. That’s a lot more important than any bonuses the rest of us get.”

  “Maybe I think the rest of you are valuable,” I grumbled.

  “Then make yourself stronger and protect us,” Blots shot back.

  I didn’t have an answer for that.

  Chapter 14: Zentarim Academy

  I started heading south to meet up with Bashara, who was busy demolishing more ruins. With the castle project in full swing, the town was actually kind of quiet, outside of the central parts of the districts. All the industry tended to be concentrated in those areas, making it a hotbed of activity during the working day. As I continued to cut south through Windfall, I was finding that more and more homes in the periphery of the magical district were starting to be repaired.

  “Will wonders never cease?” I said, motioning to the newly renovated homes.

  “Yes, people crawled out of their crappy caves to live in houses,” Shart nodded. “Amazing.”

  “A nice cool cave sounds sublime,” commented Badgelor.

  I was about to speak to Shart again, but, as we passed the corner, a loud boom sounded. I turned to examine Bashara’s work. By the time I looked back to Shart, he was gone.

  “He’s not a big fan of the magical sort,” my badger mentioned.

  “I just wonder where he goes,” I replied.

  There was an absolute range limit between Shart and myself. It was longer, since I’d found my Ring of Mental Bonds. However, it still wasn’t all that long of a range. I’d tried to find the demon, but, wherever I looked, magically or otherwise, I’d never been able to find him. He always seemed to be nearby but never in a direction I could isolate. He had to be going to his mystical palace of blackjack and hookers, wherever that happened to be.

  Bashara nodded as I approached. She was covered in a fine layer of soot from something she had done. For a moment, a very brief moment, she almost looked content. Then, she scrutinized me, and her more serious expression kicked back on. I was still unused to seeing her scar every time I looked at her. She had decided that there was no point in hiding it with magic anymore but I had caught her tracing her finger down the scar unconsciously more tha
n once.

  She looked at me through her long eyelashes; she knew what I was here for. She waited until I walked over to the training area. Suddenly, with no preamble, her hands began weaving through the air. A moment later, she had a Fire Bolt cast and was flinging it at me. Time had slowed, so I brought up my fire barrier. Her spell was deflected without comment.

  I walked further into the area we used for battles. “You know, if this training area wasn’t here, the town barrier would have melted you when we tried this yesterday,” I said. She rolled her eyes.

  “You agreed to train with me. That alone should be enough for the town barrier to recognize that all we are doing is just practicing,” she commented. “Any thoughts on what I discussed with you yesterday?”

  “Good morning, Bashara,” I said, going over to her.

  “Good morning, Jim,” stated Bashara, realizing that the topic had been changed. She paused for a moment, as all of the dust on her body suddenly flew away. The particles seriously just left her body. Like they had someplace else to be. She was still sweaty, but now it was almost a clean sweat. As I watched, she began generating a weak spell that caused her hands to glow blue. The air around us grew chilly, sending goosebumps across my exposed flesh.

  “How did you do that?” I asked.

  “What? This?” she replied, holding up her hand. “It's just basic Watermancy. You’d be able to do it yourself, but your Water core is too underdeveloped. You could make an area brighter or warmer with your Flameology skill, though.”

  I actually knew that. I’d figured out that I could generate light by cycling Mana through my Fire core and releasing it from my hand. That brought up a question though. “Does Biological Aeromancy have an effect like that?”

  She opened her mouth to reply but then paused, frowning slightly. Her eyebrows drew together as she thought. “Probably? I know that Aeromancy can be used to generate a breeze or a slight shock, but I’m not really sure what Biological Aeromancy does. It's not well-practiced.”