The Cowboy's Christmas Baby

by Cathy McDavid

  It was only after Tanner and Daniel left home that their dad became absorbed with the business. Was there a connection? Without children at home, was his father filling the void with work? Tanner hadn’t considered that possibility until now.

  Then again, his perspective had been changing about a lot of things these past five days—all due to Ava. Tanner would move boulders with his bare hands in order to protect her. Sacrifice everything to give her what she needed. Cherish her until his dying day.

  He’d also make darn sure she and everyone else knew he was a decent, honorable, moral man. Not the cheater the world believed him to be. How and when he’d accomplish that, he wasn’t sure.

  “When are your parents arriving?” His mom wiped down the table with a damp cloth while Jewel washed the last of the dishes they’d used during lunch.

  “Shortly before Christmas. They’re staying until January third.”

  Tanner listened to them while ignoring his dad’s conversation. Ava listened to no one and instead watched her feet with intense fascination.

  “That’s a nice, long visit,” his mom said.

  “Dad’s retiring soon. They’re seriously considering buying a condo and spending winters here. Mom’s arthritis is worsening, and the dry climate’s supposed to be beneficial.” Jewel talked as she rinsed dishes. “They’ve been in contact with a real estate agent and are planning to look at some places during their visit, though they’re told the holidays aren’t a good time to buy.”

  “How exciting. I can’t wait to see them again.”

  Tanner smiled to himself. He really appreciated his mom’s efforts to make the upcoming visit with Jewel’s parents go well. He reminded himself to tell her later.

  “Have you settled on plans for Christmas Day?” she asked.

  “Not really. Any suggestions?”

  Jewel was also doing her part to make the impending visit go well. Tanner wished his dad hadn’t interrupted him before he’d had a chance to tell her about Daniel being the one who’d cheated. Part of him had wondered if the interruption was intentional and then decided no. How could his dad have known what Tanner was about to say?

  “Fixing a big meal in this tiny kitchen won’t be easy.” His mom looked around, arms crossed over her middle.

  “Same with my quarters at Sweetheart Ranch,” Jewel added. “The kitchen there is even smaller.”

  “What if we all went to a nice restaurant? There’s bound to be one open on Christmas Day. I can call around and then get back to you with a couple suggestions.”

  “That would be great!”

  “If I recall,” Shirley said, “the Desert Vista Golf Club has a very nice upscale restaurant that offers brunch on the holidays.”

  “We could celebrate beforehand at my place.” Jewel offered. “Exchange gifts and have coffee.”

  “Sounds lovely.” His mom beamed. “I can’t wait. I have a friend who crochets these darling baby sweaters. I’ll ask her for one in Ava’s size.”

  “You already gave her gifts.”

  “Nonsense, it’s her first Christmas,” his mom answered, as if that was explanation enough. “Do you mind if Daniel and his family join us? Afterward, Huck and I can go back to their house for Christmas with the children.”

  “Of course not. That’d be nice.”

  “If Daniel’s up to it,” Tanner’s mom said, a sad note in her voice. “He has good and bad days.”

  Jewel patted her arm sympathetically. “It must be hard on you, watching your son struggle.”

  “Watching both my sons struggle. This has been a difficult year for Tanner, too. He didn’t deserve—” Tanner’s mom cut herself short and squared her shoulders. “He’s a good brother to Daniel. I’m very proud of him.”

  Tanner had tensed during this last exchange, unsure how much his mother would reveal. When she didn’t elaborate, he relaxed. This was his story to tell.

  His dad ended his call and set down his phone on the side table. Without any preamble, he said, “I spoke to Murry Peterson the other day.”

  “Yeah.” Tanner wasn’t interested. Murry Peterson was his father’s attorney for the business and the one insisting Tanner stay on the down low for another year.

  “He can probably give you the name of a good family attorney.”

  At least his dad wasn’t speaking in his normal booming voice. Tanner glanced over at Jewel and his mom, relieved they were still involved in discussing Christmas plans and not paying attention to him.

  “Jewel and I only just started talking about custody,” Tanner said.

  She hadn’t raised a single objection when Tanner had requested daily visits with Ava during her stay in Mustang Valley. He wasn’t naive—he knew they’d need a formal agreement, one that should be in the works before she left, if she left. But he wanted to discuss any custody arrangement with her before hiring an attorney.

  “You shouldn’t wait,” his dad said. “Better to be the first one to act rather than the one reacting. You can bet your bottom dollar she’s already retained an attorney.”

  “I don’t think so, Dad.”

  “Don’t get caught unprepared.”

  Despite the advice being sensible, Tanner wouldn’t take it. He refused to start his new relationship with Jewel, as parents to Ava, on the wrong foot by coming on too strong.

  As if reminding him, Ava took hold of Tanner’s finger and tugged. She might have been tugging on his heart—the effect was the same.

  “I’m going to tell Jewel the truth about what happened with Daniel.”

  Tanner’s dad scowled. “That’s a bad idea, son.”

  “She won’t say anything.”

  “One, you don’t know that for a fact, and two, the timing is terrible.”

  “What better time is there, Dad? Things have changed. I’m a father, and I need to put Ava first.” Tanner repeated what Jewel had said to him the other day. “I refuse to let any child of mine suffer needlessly because of my decision.”

  His dad glanced down at the baby. “She isn’t suffering.”

  “Not yet. But it’s a possibility. If Jewel returns to barrel racing, Ava could be teased or taunted for what I’m thought to have done. Jewel was. Relentlessly.”

  “Ava’s a baby.”

  “She won’t always be.” Tanner steeled his resolve. “It’s important to me that Jewel knows what really happened. I don’t like her believing the father of her daughter cheated. I’m not a bad person, Dad.”

  “Neither is Daniel. He wasn’t himself when he approached that bull riding judge. He had a brain tumor and was on medication. His judgment was impaired.”

  “Which is why I don’t think the arena owners would win a lawsuit.” Tanner had done a little of his own research. “Daniel can’t be held responsible.”

  “Maybe. Maybe not. There are no guarantees. And frankly, we don’t have the money for a long, drawn out court battle. We’re barely covering our monthly expenses as it is.”

  Tanner sat up straighter. “Since when?”

  “This past year. Several of our clients left after the scandal broke and moved their business to competing firms. I haven’t been able to recruit enough new clients to make up the difference.”

  Tanner saw by his dad’s expression he wasn’t exaggerating. “I’m sorry to hear that, Dad.”

  “Unless something changes, we won’t be able to continue helping Daniel with his medication and physical therapy not covered by insurance.” To their credit, his parents had spent a considerable amount of their own money on Daniel and his family. “You coming clean will generate fresh interest in the cheating incident. We could lose even more customers.”

  “I’m not sure what any of this has to do with me telling Jewel the truth. She can be trusted to keep quiet.”

  “Rosalyn’s been threatening again to leave Daniel and take t
he kids.”

  “I’m sorry to hear that.”

  “Learning the truth could tip the scales.”

  Daniel adored his wife and children. Losing them would shatter him and send him into a deeper, darker place. Could Tanner be the one responsible for that?

  “I thought his doctor put him on a new antidepressant,” he said.

  “Hasn’t made any significant difference.”

  “I hate hearing that. For Rosalyn’s sake and the kids’, as well as Daniel’s.”

  “If she learns he was the one who cheated and not you,” his dad continued, “their marriage will be over. Mark my word.”

  As much as Tanner wished it were different, he knew what his father said was a real possibility. An emotional person to begin with, Rosalyn’s current state was fragile—the result of dealing with her husband’s brain cancer, his postsurgery disabilities and raising two children virtually on her own. Learning he’d attempted to win a championship by cheating might be the last straw.

  In addition to Tanner’s parents, Rosalyn’s family also did what they could to help. Unfortunately, Daniel wasn’t making things easy on her. The aftereffects of the surgery, along with his medication and various limitations, had caused him to suffer bouts of severe depression and mood swings. As a result, he often lashed out at Rosalyn and, on occasion, his children.

  No one blamed him, and everyone tried their best to understand. Daniel always regretted his actions and apologized afterward. But there was a limit to how much a gentle and sensitive woman like Rosalyn could stand before walking.

  “I’m not asking you to keep silent for me,” Tanner’s dad said. “Do it for your brother. He needs his family. He can’t survive without them, and he’s lost so much already.”

  Tanner hesitated before relenting. “All right. For now. But no promises.”

  He could wait a few more weeks. But regardless, he was telling Jewel after the first of the year, whether she left or stayed.

  Lifting Ava into his arms, he stood. “We should get you back to your mom.”

  His dad also stood and, taking Tanner by surprise, kissed Ava gently on her head. “Bye, honey bun.”

  When he straightened, he wore a smile. It didn’t last, but for a brief moment, Tanner was reminded of the dad from his own childhood—and the dad that Daniel had been before brain cancer struck. The one his children wouldn’t get to know if Rosalyn took them away.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  JEWEL WALKED TEDDY BEAR around the horse barn for his cool down, her spirits soaring. She’d had a good lesson this morning, followed by three successful practice runs.

  As if in agreement, Teddy Bear pestered her nonstop, nuzzling her hair and nibbling the end of her ponytail.

  “Quit it, you goofball,” she said, a laugh in her voice. Rather than push him away, she reached up with one hand and scratched his neck.

  He responded with a snort and a shake of his big head.

  On her third circuit, she came upon Tanner in one of the outdoor stalls. He crouched in front of the automatic waterer, tinkering with a pair of pliers.

  She stopped in front of the stall. Teddy Bear immediately began a sniffing introduction with the stall’s occupant, a dappled gray Arabian who’d stuck his head out over the top bar.

  “Waterer not working?” Jewel asked.

  Tanner glanced up, his elation at seeing her reflected in his broad grin. “I think the mechanism is plugged.”

  A common problem. Horses often drank with their mouths full, and food fell into the waterer, eventually creating a blockage.

  “Okay. Well, I won’t bother you.” She’d see him later for his daily visit with Ava.

  “I watched your practice runs this morning.” He stuck the pliers up into the waterer’s underside and twisted, his brow knitted in concentration. “You did good.”

  “Yeah. I think Teddy and I are finally getting our groove back.”

  “You’ll be competing again in no time.”

  She marveled at how comfortable she and Tanner had become in the past eight days. Nowhere close to where they’d been before, but better. Jewel wasn’t fooling herself. They still had a lot of problems to resolve.

  They’d yet to broach the subject of custody after her stay at Sweetheart Ranch came to an end. Not since that first day when he’d mentioned seeking shared custody should she return to professional rodeoing.

  Of course, until she chose a career direction, they really couldn’t make a decision regarding custody. Jewel taking a permanent job at Sweetheart Ranch, if one was even offered, might be the easiest solution. She’d be close to Tanner and his parents. Her parents, too, for five months of the year, if they became winter visitors.

  After today, however, she could see herself returning to the rodeo circuit. But what would she do with Ava? The thought put a damper on her previously soaring spirits. Before Tanner reappeared in her life, the answer had been obvious. She’d have taken Ava with her on the road. Other barrel racing mothers did it. Yes, they had help, often in the form of husbands. There were, however, alternative solutions.

  But going on the road without Ava wasn’t one of them. Jewel couldn’t do it. For a single weekend, perhaps. If she had no choice. Not every weekend or even every other weekend. She’d just as soon part with her right arm.

  Tanner accompanying them wasn’t her first choice. Depending on how their custody talks went, though, it might be a compromise she had to make.

  “Okay if I come by about two?” he asked, still fiddling with the waterer.

  “That should be fine.”

  “I didn’t see Tracee this morning while you were practicing.”

  “She’s watching Ava in my quarters. Finals are next week, and she’s hitting the books hard.”

  Teddy Bear gave a sudden high-pitched squeal and jerked his head, nearly tugging the lead rope from Jewel’s grip. He and the Arabian had decided they weren’t friends. Sending Teddy Bear a clear message, the Arabian whirled and kicked and retreated to the rear of the stall.

  “Stop it, you two.” Tanner pocketed the pliers and grabbed the stall’s top rung. Hauling himself to his feet, he tested the waterer, pressing on the activator and nodding with satisfaction when the water flowed freely. He then made his way to the stall door. “Did you have a chance to talk to your parents about Christmas Day?”

  “I did,” Jewel answered. “They’re excited. And your mom called me this morning. She made reservations for brunch at that golf resort.”

  “She told me.” He exited the stall, closed the door and faced her. “How do your folks feel about...me?”

  “They haven’t really said.”

  He sent her a dubious look. “Why don’t I believe you?”

  “They haven’t,” Jewel repeated.

  “You ask them?”

  Chagrined, she shook her head.

  “Don’t want to know? Or don’t want to answer their questions?”

  “A little of both?”

  Jewel’s mom had been considerate every time they’d talked, not putting Jewel on the spot. She’d also kept Jewel’s father from horning in on their calls. He’d be less considerate than her mother and push Jewel for answers she wasn’t ready to give. Not while her feelings for Tanner remained all over the place. Getting comfortable with each other was one thing, confident she could trust him again, quite another.

  Raising her gaze, she was startled to see a shadow of regret darken Tanner’s eyes. He’d mentioned losing his friends after the cheating incident. She hadn’t thought about him losing the affection and respect of her family until now.

  She straightened, reminding herself not to feel too sorry for him. He should have thought of the repercussions before he cheated. His current predicament, hers, too, was a direct result of the terrible decision he’d made.

  “I need to hurry,” she sa
id. “See you this afternoon.”

  “You have a wedding tonight?” He moved in closer, resting an arm on the top stall rung and looking like he didn’t want her to go.

  “Yes. And Emily asked me to photograph the Christmas decorations.”

  “I drove by the ranch yesterday evening. Very impressive.”

  He was right. The display, while elaborate, was tasteful instead of tacky. Multicolored lights adorned the house and had been strung along the fence bordering the front yard. Battery-operated candles lit every window. An antique horse-drawn sled, complete with runners, had been set up in the front yard. A pair of lighted life-size reindeer were tethered to the sleigh, which was filled with gaily wrapped fake presents. A huge wreath sporting a big red bow hung on the front door. Smaller matching wreaths adorned the front gate. The twenty-foot saguaro cactus at the end of the driveway had been transformed into a comical Santa Claus, complete with long white beard trailing to the ground.

  And that was only the beginning. The decorating company had even more plans for the inside. Jewel couldn’t wait to see what they’d done.

  “You should bring your parents by,” she said.

  “Mom would like that.” The corners of his mouth tilted up in that attractive way she’d always found impossible to resist. She would have turned away if not for the invisible pull.

  No. Not happening. He wasn’t going to distract her. Tanner Bridwell wasn’t the same man she’d once known, and his moral compass no longer pointed true north.

  “I’ll see you at two.” She ducked past him and escaped before he had a chance to reply. Teddy Bear was forced to trot in order to keep up with her on their way back to his stall inside the horse barn.

  The hours dragged by after that. Jewel busied herself with never-ending laundry, updating her online portfolio and touching base with some of her old barrel racing friends who were thrilled with her recent progress. She also gave herself a very lengthy talk about the dangers of avoiding any intimacies with Tanner. When he arrived at her quarters five minutes early, her defenses were firmly in place.