Chaotic Anger: The Seven MC Book 1

by Breck, A. R.

  I watch as the van slows to a stop, noticing me after a moment—as expected—and pulling a sharp left towards me. I pull the gun from my pants where I slipped it earlier and flicking the safety off, pop a bullet right through the windshield.

  I pull the trigger again, and the car swerves off.

  “Got em.”

  “Oh my, God.” Ivy cries behind me, and I can feel her sobs shakes behind me.

  “We’re almost home.” I push the safety back down and slide the gun back into my jeans.

  I gun it, skidding down the road and creation a fucking tornado of dust around me. Hopping back on the highway, I book it down the highway and make it home in half the time.

  Charlie opens up the gate before I even make it to him. I’m assuming he can tell by the look on my face something is up.

  He must have finished that damn swing set.

  I roll inside and park up front. Ivy is off the back before I can even turn my bike off.

  “Stop for a second.” I bark at her.

  She turns around, cheeks flushed and windblown and her eyes glassy from tears. “Stop for what! I know what they’re after. They’re after me! Look at what I’ve done. I’ve made you kill two people in the middle of the fucking day because I’m with you! I should just go back to him now and save you from any more trouble.” She whips the tears from her face.

  My hand lashes out, snaking around her wrist and pulling her towards me. My grip is firmer than it should be, the anger at her words builds without warning. “Fuck no.”

  I see Lilah and Violet from the corner of my eyes. Violet looks on curiously and quickly turns Lilah away, bringing her back to the swing set to play.

  “Why not?” Her hands fly up in the air. Everyone starts flooding outside of the mechanics shop, confused looks on their faces at what all the commotion is. “I’m going to get you killed. I’m going to get everyone killed! It’s what I do best.”

  I light a cigarette, because if I don’t, I’m afraid I’ll lose my shit. The last time my anger got this bad, I broke my bike. I don’t want that to happen again.

  “What the fuck is going on?” My dad steps up beside Ivy, laying a hand on her shoulder. “What’d you do?” He directs the question towards me, anger in his tone.

  “I didn’t fucking do anything.” I point my cigarette at him.

  “It was me! It’s my fault.” Ivy cries.

  “No, it’s not! Shut the fuck up, Ivy!” I roar.

  “What the hell are you talking about?” My dad barks out.

  “Aziel killed two people, and I know it’s because they’re looking for me!”

  “For fuck sake.” I give her my back, scrubbing my hands down my face to pull my rage back. It’s building. It’s fucking building.

  “Who the fuck did you kill?” West steps towards me, his frown creating a heavy crease between his eyes.

  “Mexicans.” I sigh.

  “They’re looking for me. Someone could have seen it, Aziel. The police could be on their way right now to arrest you. Why aren’t you freaking out?”

  “Because I know what the fuck I’m doing.” I turn back around, lifting an eyebrow in her direction.

  “I’m leaving.” Ivy turns around and rushes inside.

  Everyone makes a move to follow us. “No. I’ve got this.” I put my hand up. They all look at me hesitantly as I toss my cigarette onto the ground and follow her inside.

  Anyone who knows me realizes I’m seconds away from losing my shit.

  “Ivy, wait!” I shout at her. She’s already across the room and making her way up the stairs.

  “No, Aziel. I’m not putting you guys at risk. I don’t want to put Lilah at risk. We’ll just go back to him. I can’t let anyone else get hurt.”

  I quicken my pace, taking two steps at a time. “Ivy.” I swallow down the rage when I make it to the top of the stairs. She tries to shut the door in my face, but I slap my palm on the door and push it open. “Stop, for one fucking second!”

  She doesn’t answer me, moving around the room as she sniffles quietly. She doesn’t really do anything, just shuffles around the room and picks up.

  “Why are you crying?” I ask softly.

  “Because!” She throws the shirt she was folding onto the bed. “I’ll never be happy! Not ever. I come here, and I’m finally happy. For two seconds, I feel relief and content in my life. I’ve never been to the ocean. Did you know that? I’ve never been to the ocean or a really cool beach like that. I’ve never kissed a boy that I’ve actually liked. I’m finally happy, Aziel, and now I can’t be. I’ll never be able to be happy.”

  “You can be happy.”

  “No, I can’t! Don’t you understand? I’ll always be Santiago’s. He’ll never let me go. And going outside these walls and having not one, but two men trailing me, I realize I’ll never be free. And want to know why?” She whips off her shirt, turning around and shocking the fucking hell out of me.

  On the left of her back hip is an ugly looking scar in the shape of two letters.

  S.F.

  Santiago Fernandez.

  Not only that, but scars, cuts, burns, bruises, and so many injuries fill her back and sides. She’s filled with abuse. Her face is busted up, but I put the rest of her body out of my mind. It’s worse than I thought. It’s one million times worse than I thought.

  That’s all it takes.

  I grab the ashtray off my dresser and chuck it at my window. The window shatters, and the ashtray flies outside.

  Fucking hell.

  That bastard branded her.

  “Fuck!” I roar.

  My vision nearly fades, the darkness fading my vision. I rub my hands over my eyes, and when my vision comes back, I see Ivy kneeling on the ground. Her hands are laced between her back and her gaze is faded out on the wall behind her.

  “Ivy… what the fuck are you doing?”

  She barely blinks, her gaze almost dead as she stares at the wall. Her chest heaves, the bra accentuating her cleavage as her top half remains half naked.

  “Ivy.” I snap my fingers in front of her face. “Ivy, answer me, now!”

  She tilts her head up, looking me in the eyes but so, so fucking far away.

  “Why are you doing this?” Blink. Blink. “Ivy, snap out of it!” I refuse to hit her. I refuse to inflict any kind of injury on this kid that has endured so much already. “Ivy!” My chest shakes with the volume of my shout.

  Her gaze comes in focus.

  “Where the fuck did you go?” I frown at her, almost accusingly. I’m angry, fucking upset, and confused.

  “I… I don’t know.” Her eyes are still a little lost, but clearer than they were. “I don’t know.” She repeats.

  “Have you done that before?”

  She nods.

  I think of her, submissive and at Santiago’s will. “He make you do this?”

  She nods again.

  I nod, and nod again. I keep nodding until a migraine makes an appearance. “I’ll be back.” I turn and head towards the door.

  “Where are you going?”

  I glance at her over my shoulder. “Going to figure out what to do next.” I head downstairs, almost roving over Lilah on my way outside. “Hey, kid. Do you like your swings?”

  “Yeah!” She throws her hands in the air. “It’s so much fun!”

  “Cool, you’ll have to show me later, okay?”

  “Okay.” She gives me a toothy smile.

  “Your mom’s upstairs if you want to go see her.”

  “Is Mommy sad?”

  I bite my lip as I think of a response. I don’t know how to deal with kids or their overly intuitive minds. “Uh, she was. But I think she’ll be pretty happy to see you.” I give her a wink.

  Violet comes around the corner. “There you are.” She says to Lilah. “You can’t run off on me, little missy.” She looks up at me. “How is Ivy?”

  “She’ll be fine.” I hope. I really fucking hope so.

  “Okay. I have to ge
t some homework done, so I hope it’s okay I bring her Lilah.”

  “Yeah, I’m betting she would like to see Lilah right now.”

  She smiles and grabs Lilah’s hand, heading upstairs.

  I walk to the back door and head out to the shop. The guys are all standing around Pascal’s bike murmuring softly. When they hear the door open, six pairs of eyes shoot up to look at me.

  “The window lost, huh?” West chuckles.

  “Shut up.” I flick him off.

  “You want to call church?” My dad steps up beside me.

  “No, I really don’t.”

  “I think we should—” He starts.

  “No. I don’t want to go to church. I want to hop on my bike and go find that fucker and tear him apart. I’m done playing games. This shit has to end.”

  “And it will, brother.” Cassius says.

  I shake my head. “No. We need to take down these places, but our priority right now has to be finding Santiago and taking him out.”

  “So, what are you proposing?” My dad narrows his eyes at me.

  “Let’s go down to Mexico. Let’s go down there and stay there until we find him. Let’s take him out. Take them all out. And be done with it once and for all.”

  “When do you want to go?” West asks.

  “Soon. Let’s hammer down where we’re going and take it from there.”

  Everyone looks at my dad, waiting for a formal agreement from the President. He looks at me, lifting his hands. “If VP thinks this is a solid plan, I think we should roll with it. The girl is worth this?”

  I shake my head. “It’s not about Ivy. It’s about so much more, and you know that.”

  “Is the girl worth it?” My dad repeats, slower this time. Each word is accentuated, like he wants to ingrain them into me.

  I run my teeth over my lower lip, contemplating an answer.

  “Yeah, she’s worth it.” It feels like a weight lifted off my chest with those words.

  His hand lands on my shoulder. “Good answer. Looks like we’re heading to Mexico, boys.”

  I hear the door creak, and we all whip our head around and see Ivy standing in the doorway. “I’m coming with you.”

  I bark out a laugh. “No.”

  She folds her arms over her chest. “I’m coming.”

  My dad steps forward. “I know you want to help, kid. We all appreciate it, but it’s going to be dangerous. And to be honest, I think you’ll be a little bit of a distraction for my boy here.”

  “A little?” West laughs.

  I snarl at my best friend. Looking at Ivy, I say, “You’re not going because you’ll be safer here.”

  “I’m not asking. I’ll go whether you let me or not. You’re not the only one that wants to take him down.”

  “We understand that, but you aren’t coming with us.” Pascal says from beside my dad.

  I appreciate that everyone is in agreement with me. They may have not liked Ivy when she first got her, but she’s obviously growing on them.

  She’s growing on me, too.

  She steps towards all of us, the faded look gone from her eyes and now a fire burns in her irises. “Listen, I get it. You think I’m not able to take care of myself. I don’t know much about him or his business. But I do know something.”

  I step forward. “What is it?”

  “If I tell you, you’ll take me with you?”

  I shake my head. “No.”

  She steps back. “Then I guess you’ll never know.”

  “Ivy,” I bark as she starts walking out, “fucking tell me.”

  “If you let me come with you, I’ll tell you. If you don’t, you’re on your own.” This fucking woman.

  “Z, this might be big…” West says from behind me.

  I look at my dad, needing direction. I can’t let her get killed because I allowed her to tag along. I won’t fucking allow it.

  “It’s your call, son.” Pops says to me.

  “But this might be a chance to take Santiago out for good.” Pascal chimes in, his decision wavering.

  “Fine. Fuck. Fine, okay? You can come with. Now tell me.” I slide a cigarette out of my pocket and spark it up. I’m becoming a damn chain smoker.

  “How do I know you’ll actually let me come? I could give you this information and you could just lock me up and go do it by yourself.”

  “I keep my word.” I say through a plume of smoke.

  “If you go back on your word, I swear I’ll leave here. I don’t care what it takes.”

  I nod my head.

  “What’s the date?” She says out of nowhere.

  I have to check my phone because I’m that out of touch with reality at this point. “October Thirteenth.”

  She nods. “Día de los Muertos.” The words flow off her tongue so fluently it takes me back.

  “Huh?” West says from beside me, echoing the rest of our thoughts.

  “The Day of the Dead. It’s probably the only day of the year Santiago makes a huge production with. He has people from all over the world come to his place for his extravagant party. Not only does he host his Día de los Muertos party, but he also hosts his biggest auction of the year. Since you guys destroyed most of his inventory in Tijuana, I don’t know if that’s happening now.”

  “Auction?” Niles asks from the back of the room.

  No one says anything, and Ivy gets a blank look on her face.

  “Oh.” He says.

  “Where is it?” My dad asks, curiosity and excitement in his tone.

  “This is the only other place I’ve been brought to. And I’ve only been brought there because of the huge party he throws every year.”

  “Where is it?” I ask again.

  “Um, I think the city is called Salvatora, or Salvatara. No, wait. It’s Salvatierra. Do you know where that is? I think it’s like an hour or so away from his house.”

  I pull out my phone and type in Salvatierra. “It’s about a half hour south of Tijuana.” Looking up at my dad, I sigh out in relief. “I’m going to get this bastard. Finally.”

  He slaps me on the back. “We’re going to get him, Aziel. His clock is ticking.”

  “When are we going?” Ivy asks, anger and an eagerness building in her eyes. A fire is lit like I’ve never seen. There’s life inside of her, it’s just been buried by the hate and darkness of Tijuana.

  “We’ll go a day or two before the Day of the Dead celebration. Give us enough time to scope out the place and figure out our moves.” My dad says to her.

  She nods her head and backs out of the door.

  “Hey,” I holler to her, “where’re you going?”

  “To play with Lilah. For the first time in I don’t know how long, I’m excited about something. Lilah deserves to see me happy like this.” And she leaves, taking her strength and my breath with her.

  16

  Ivy

  The next few days pass in a blur. I’ve rolled into some sort of routine. I love routine. That’s what I’m used to. It’s how I’ve been living the last five and a half years. It’s different this time, though.

  I’m no longer living in fear.

  I’m no longer held captive by a monster.

  I’m free.

  That’s the one that hits me the hardest. I’m honestly, truly free. Not only that, but Lilah is free, too. She was born into captivity and never knew the outside of the walls in Tijuana.

  She notices a difference, too. She’s happier. She smiles more. She laughs more. She loves the swing set, and she loves the people here. The guys love her, too. She’s melting all of their cold, empty hearts and turning them into living, breathing humans. I never figured I’d find people that I could grow close to again. It makes me feel it’s too good to be true. I feel like my clock is ticking. Like the sand in the timer is about to drop its last grain.

  Like I’m going to turn the corner and there will be the grim reaper, ready to take me for good this time.

  I snap out of my thoughts as Li
lah calls my name for the hundredth time.

  “Mommy!” She screams.

  “What? Sorry.”

  “Push me really high.” She screeches, her little legs getting her nowhere.

  “I’m coming.” I stand up from the chair that Aziel set out here for me. Lilah forces me to spend most of my day out here, the least I can do is sit in a chair.

  Aziel has been gone for the last two days. Him and the guys rode over to the Texas chapter and were going to discuss the plan for the next couple weeks. The Texas chapter will step in if things go south, but I heard Aziel mentioning to the other guys that they don’t want to get in the middle of it if they don’t have to.

  Today is the perfect day. It’s cooler and crisp here in the mountains. It reminds me more of home. The sky is clear and blue. And it’s silent. Without any of the guys here, this place feels almost abandoned.

  “I thought I heard screaming out here.” I glance over my shoulder and see Violet walking towards us.

  “Hey, what’s up? Aren’t you supposed to be in school?” I ask.

  At only sixteen years old, Violet still goes to the nearby public school. She’s become an ally to me here, and I’m slowing bending my wall down and letting her in.

  “I skipped today. Woke up with a killer migraine.”

  I narrow my eyes at her. “You look totally fine.”

  She waves me off. “Whatever. I wanted to take advantage of one day with the guys gone. It’s like a mini vacation without them here. I don’t have to listen to them talk about pussy all day and get drunk all night. Ugh.”

  “They are…” I glance at Lilah and try to think of an appropriate word. “interesting guys.”

  “Interesting? They’re savage beasts that don’t know how to be tamed.” She taps her chin. “Well, except for Aziel. You seem to be taming him pretty well.”

  I scoff. “I’m not doing anything. We’re not doing anything.”

  “All you guys do is hangout around each other. Are you guys dating now?”

  “No! We’re not really doing anything, Not really, anyway. We’re just… getting to know each other. And he’s not around me all the time.”

  “Girl… you don’t know what he was like before you came around. He wouldn’t even really be around girls. If he thought a girl was worth his time, he’d take her for a night and throw her in the garbage the next morning. He doesn’t like people, not really. The guys, I guess. But girls? The guy is angry when it comes to girls. Until you…”