Chasing The Bodyguard: An Irish Mob Action Adventure Road Trip Romance

by Grace Risata

“Goodnight, boss. Thanks for the food.”

  I rolled over and closed my eyes, silently willing sleep to come sooner rather than later.

  Mercifully, I was out like a light within seconds.

  Chapter Eleven

  Leandra

  “No mom, just give me five more minutes. I won’t be late for school, I swear!”

  “I can safely say that I’ve never been accused of being anyone’s mother before,” a deep baritone voice boomed with a hint of amusement. “But I can’t give you another five minutes. We’re already behind schedule, Leandra.”

  I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and sat bolt upright in bed at the sound of his voice. In a perfect world, Samuel would be naked and about to crawl into bed with me, there would be no schedule, and we’d share more orgasms than I could count.

  But alas, that was not the world I lived in.

  “What schedule are we on again? If I remember correctly, there was a lot of driving with no destination in mind. So…how are we late for that?”

  I am not a morning person. Just because I crawl my ass out of bed every day by eight o’clock and rain hell down upon my disobedient crew of misfit Irish gang members, does not mean I enjoy the bright sunshine on my face at such an unholy hour.

  Wait a fucking minute. There is no light creeping through the cheap hotel curtains. What time is it?

  “Are you fucking kidding me?” I screeched, not giving one single shit if I might wake up the other sane people sleeping in neighboring rooms. “It’s quarter after four! What the hell, Samuel?”

  My bodyguard ran a hand through his wild, uncombed hair and sat down on my bed. So close, yet so far. I wonder if he’d get up and run away if I tried to reach out and touch him. Probably. So skittish. Maybe he knows I bite?

  “Look…here’s the thing. I’d like to make you an offer. A trade if you will…”

  He trailed off uncomfortably and I immediately perked up and began paying attention. I swear this was the fastest I’d ever gone from deep sleep to complete awakeness in my entire life. While I’m not exactly sure that ‘awakeness’ is even a word, the rest of my cylinders are all firing away and eager to hear his proposal.

  “I’m listening. You know I’m always open to working towards a mutually beneficial arrangement. What do you have that I want?”

  There’s only one decent answer to that question, sir. Your body. Let me have a chance to show you what I can do, how I can make you feel, and everything else will fall into place. It took every ounce of restraint not to rub my hands together like a maniacal super villain.

  “You want information and I want silence,” he responded cryptically.

  No. I want your naked body on top of mine. Or mine on top of yours. Or both of us sideways and upside down. I’m not picky.

  “I’m losing patience. Make me your offer or I’m going back to dreamland.”

  “Okay,” he replied cautiously, as though afraid to continue. I’d never seen fear or hesitation on the man…ever. This new demeanor of his began to bother me. What could be so awful?

  “We do have a destination, Leandra. I’ve been going over all the possible options to figure out the best way to keep you safe until the heat blows over. Only one place came to mind. It’s not somewhere I want to take you, but there’s no chance in hell anyone would expect to find you there. I know you’re going to have questions, and that’s understandable, however I’m not willing to give any answers yet. So here’s my offer. You get your ass out of bed, take five minutes to piss and freshen up, and then get in the truck. We drive until five o’clock tonight, only stopping to use the bathroom and get food, and then we’ll arrive at a secure location.”

  “I fail to see how this offer benefits me. Am I supposed to be relieved that you found a safe house? As long as we’re on the move, no one will catch up to us. I have enough cash to last for quite awhile.”

  “Somehow, someone will see us and report back to Barsotti. I’m not living in shithole motels and eating greasy garbage for the next few weeks. Besides…there’s somewhere I need to go. I don’t really want to bring you with me, but it’s effectively killing two birds with one stone. I get to keep you safe and also check on a situation that needs attention.”

  Hmm. The plot thickens. Where the fuck does he need to go? What situation needs his attention? Color me intrigued.

  “I’m not convinced, Samuel. What do I get out of this? What if I don’t want to accompany you on this little field trip?”

  Such lies. Nothing would stop me now. Hell, I’d handcuff myself to his wrist at this point. I just like to sweeten the pot as much as I can. Rule number two in business: know when to negotiate.

  “Here’s my offer, Leandra. You don’t ask a single question until tonight, and you’ll learn more about me in one day than you have in the past six months. Deal?”

  “Sold,” I replied before he could rescind the offer. “But if I don’t get a payout at the end of the day, all bets are off. Should my head hit the pillow tonight no wiser than it is right now, we’re going to have a very large problem on our hands. I don’t take kindly to false promises.”

  He shook his head sadly as though already regretting the arrangement, and held out a hand for me to shake. Instead of sealing the deal as he intended, I used his outstretched limb to boost myself out of bed, stand up to my full height, and whisper in his ear.

  “No questions. Twelve hours. The timer starts now.”

  I turned around with the intention of striding victoriously to the bathroom when he took the opportunity to share a fun fact.

  “Actually, we turn the clocks back an hour due to moving through a time zone. So, in reality, it’s thirteen hours.”

  Fuck.

  The bastard was winning already and the game had barely begun.

  ********

  Just because I was not permitted to ask any questions, due to me taking that dumbass deal six hours ago, did not mean I couldn’t talk at all.

  “I wonder how over-the-road truck drivers do this every single day,” I mumbled around a giant bite of my turkey, bacon, and cheddar sub sandwich. “This is so boring. My legs are cramped up, I’ve seen nothing but one farm after the next, and this has to be the lamest road in the whole entire country. I mean seriously! No mountains, no valleys, no big cities. Yeah, okay, St. Louis was kind of interesting, but only for ten minutes. I think the Arch is overrated.”

  Maybe I would have changed my mind and been able to appreciate the damn tourist attraction, had we actually taken a break to get out and walk around. This truck was becoming a prison on wheels.

  I got a grunt in reply. If my travel companion hadn’t been so drop dead sexy with his rumpled hair, crystal blue eyes, and steely look of determination, I might have just opened the door and taken my chances at making a run for it.

  “That’s okay, Samuel. You don’t have to make actual conversation with human words in the English language. I can entertain myself just fine. I’ve been doing it for thirty-four years…another day sure as hell won’t kill me.”

  Deciding to do something productive instead of just pout, I got out my notebook and made a list.

  “If you’re no longer on speaking terms with me and you’d like to communicate strictly with written notes, I’m perfectly fine with that,” Samuel stated, flashing a rare smile that showcased one of his dimples.

  “Nice try. I’m busying myself by making lists.”

  “What kind of lists?”

  “Go fuck yourself if you think you’re allowed to ask me questions when I’m stuck conversing without them. Two can play at this game.”

  He simply shrugged and focused on the expansive open road ahead of us. I really had no choice but to reply, due to the fact that the radio quit working entirely and I had long since gotten annoyed with the twenty songs I downloaded on my burner phone. The silence in the truck was deafening.

  “Fine. I can see you’re consumed by curiosity, so I will generously share the contents of my list with you. The first
one is a shopping list. You have nothing at all, and I only had one change of clothes. We need to get supplies. So far I’ve come up with the following items: toiletries including shampoo and conditioner for me, soap for me, ten or twelve complete outfits for me, sexy lingerie for me, snack foods for both of us, several pairs of shoes for me, and a laptop or tablet for me to amuse myself. You need some clothes, body wash, the musky cologne that you wear everyday that is clearly not with you at the moment, deodorant, and…anything else? Please don’t hesitate to add essential items to my list. Don’t worry, I’m footing the bill for this adventure.”

  “Gee thanks. Are you sure you can spare it? I mean, it’s very generous of you already. Let’s see…the list consisted of a whole new wardrobe for you, including lingerie that will not be needed for any reason at all, and I get cologne and some snack foods? Your kindness is humbling, boss.”

  Wow. Some people are just ungrateful.

  “Lingerie will certainly be needed. In order to perform at my highest level, I need to be my best self. If I don’t look good, then I don’t feel good. Confidence comes from within. Do you think I can survive under pressure wearing cotton panties from Wal-mart? Fuck no. I need silk undergarments, preferably from La Perla or Agent Provocateur. When you dress like a million dollars, you can’t help but feel like a million dollars. Think about it for a second. If I’m wearing three hundred dollar embroidered French lace panties, I’m not going to walk around with my shoulders slumped trying to hide from the world. Fuck that. This bitch right here holds her head up high, shoulders back, dominating everyone and everything around her. The clothes make the woman. Own the panties, own the world.”

  And if that little confession has Samuel drooling in anticipation of what he might find under my clothes on any given day, bonus points for me.

  After a solid five minutes of silence while I concentrated on the shopping list, my bodyguard finally spoke up.

  “I don’t agree with that. I think you would still capture the attention of everyone in the room no matter what bra you were wearing. As a matter of fact, I’m kind of surprised you have panties at all. I pegged you as someone that went au natural under your dresses.”

  Wow. Does that mean he’s fantasized about ripping off my clothes to reveal nothing underneath? Bonus points for Samuel. I had no real reply that wouldn’t have involved asking fifty questions, so I kept quiet to nurture an air of disinterest.

  ********

  I stared at the clock on the truck’s dashboard for the thousandth time, willing this day to speed up just a little bit more. My whole body filled with anticipation at the thought of where we might end up. During one brief mid-afternoon stop to refuel the truck, I snuck inside the gas station and bought a map of the United States. It kept me occupied to follow our course and make a few crazy predictions.

  Once we left Missouri and ventured into Kansas, I knew we were getting close. Samuel took a deep breath and sighed in resignation. Hot damn…making progress. As four-thirty rolled around, I licked my lips in excitement and mentally prepared myself to accept whatever I would learn about the mysterious man.

  Letting my mind wander, I came up with at least half a dozen possible scenarios.

  1) Samuel was indeed part of the witness protection program and we were going back to his house in Kansas. Maybe a wife would be waiting?

  2) Samuel stole a pickup truck from someone in Kansas and he was returning it out of a sense of guilt. That explained the license plates on this rust bucket that had held me prisoner for the past two days. Perhaps after the stolen vehicle was returned, he could breathe easy and go back to the wife and kid that were undoubtedly waiting for him.

  3) Samuel had a score to settle with some asshole from Kansas and he was bringing me along to exact a swift and merciless revenge. Once the jackass was murdered and I was arrested, Samuel could safely reunite with his wife and kids.

  4) Samuel owed a debt to someone in Kansas and he could finally repay that person now that he had me and my eighty grand along for the ride. Once the loan shark was off his back, my bodyguard would be able to return to his wife, kids, and family dog.

  5) Samuel hid a stash of weapons, jewelry, and cash from a robbery he committed in Kansas. Now that some time had passed, he could collect the merchandise and return to his wife, kids, dog, and that beautiful house with the white picket fence out front.

  6) Samuel woke up this morning, hit his head while getting out of bed, all his amnesia went away, and he finally remembered having a wife, kids, dog, white house with a picket fence, and the perfect life in Kansas.

  Yes, all my scenarios involved his stunning, yet down to earth wife. She would undoubtedly be blonde, blue-eyed, big breasted, able to cook any meal he wanted, extremely modest enough not to realize how damn attractive she was, and happily deep throat all the cock that got shoved down her throat. I hated her already.

  After suddenly slowing down to take an exit off the main interstate, Samuel began to grip the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles turned white. It was almost time for my questions to be answered, and I was more than ready to find out some useful information.

  “Okay,” I said, finally getting fed up with all the secrecy after a long day in a stifling hot truck with no air conditioning, “It’s time to fess up. Where exactly are we going?”

  In response, he merely pointed to a green sign that stood by the side of the road.

  Brumby, Kansas…population 2,172.

  Oh, okay. That explains everything!

  “That’s not an answer,” I chastised with impatience, rolling down the truck window as we drove through bustling downtown Brumby. While the air smelled a hell of a lot fresher than it did back home in New York, the hustle and bustle was greatly diminished. As in, I saw a bank, a post office, a diner, an ice cream shop, and not much else. Before I knew it, we were headed out of Brumby and whizzing down country roads past sprawling green pastures and farm fields.

  “Exciting,” I complained, not very impressed with anything I’d seen so far. “When do we get to the part where I learn something new about you?”

  Samuel took several deep and cleansing breaths before gritting his teeth and giving me an explanation.

  “In roughly fifteen minutes we’re going to turn down a narrow gravel road that leads to a farm. We will not be receiving a warm reception, so don’t expect the red carpet to be rolled out in welcome. Don’t plan on the luxury lifestyle you’re accustomed to.”

  I was about to ask what the hell he meant by that, but the man suddenly slammed on the brakes and pulled over to the side of the road.

  “Look at me,” he demanded, as serious as I’d ever seen him. “This is not fun and games. You can lose the diva persona right fucking now. The people you’re about to meet are very humble, very salt of the earth, and extremely conservative. You will refrain from cursing, do not look down on them and act like a spoiled princess, and above all else…no matter what I say…do not argue with me.”

  My mouth hung open as wide as it would go and I fought back the urge to punch this fucker in the face. Just what kind of monster does he think I am? Sure, I have the finest things life has to offer, but they were not simply handed to me. I worked my fingers to the bone and hustled for every last cent in my offshore bank accounts. Fuck this prick. Fuck him hard. I was just about to tell him exactly what I thought of this plan, but he kept right on lecturing.

  “I haven’t been home in over seven months, nor have I explained to them why I left. You’re going to hear me throwing out several lies, but I don’t want you to look at me like I’ve gone crazy and call me out on them. If for any reason you piss me off, I will not hesitate to quit working for you and kick that pretty little ass to the curb. Have I made myself clear, Leandra?”

  I narrowed my eyes at this arrogant bastard, not appreciating his challenge to my authority, yet getting incredibly turned on by the dominant way he spoke. Was it possible to be filled with hatred and lust at the same time? Yes. Definitely. On
e certainly had a way of fueling the other.

  “Crystal clear,” I murmured with curiosity as he pulled back onto the road and continued our collision course with destiny. While it seemed as though he completely took charge, I knew I had him by the balls. In this business with all the criminal shit we did, it was best to keep your loved ones at arm’s length from anyone who might use them as pawns. Thus the simple act of bringing me here was a giant risk on his part. However, no matter what had happened back in New York, he’d never threatened to quit before. Interesting. I’ll bide my time and see what’s gotten him so worked up.

  “I’m going to regret this,” he growled while shaking his head. I noticed it wasn’t the only body part that shook. His hands visibly trembled and I had to ask myself just what exactly we were about to walk into.

  “Samuel, if there’s anything else you need to warn me about, now would be the time.”

  “We’ll just have to wing it,” he advised, making me wonder if he were speaking more to me or to himself.

  Sure enough, we eventually turned down a long gravel driveway and made our way toward a little farmhouse that loomed ominously in the distance. Okay, that’s a lie for dramatic effect. As we got closer, I can honestly say the quaint two story home was yellow in color and had a cute wraparound porch with white railings. Let me not forget to mention the pair of wicker rocking chairs that gave a down-home kind of feel to the entire place. I swear it was right out of ‘Midwest Farm Living’ magazine if such a thing actually existed. Hell, for all I knew, it really did exist. I didn’t know the first thing about farming or the Midwest. Looks like I was about to learn though…

  “This is absolutely going to bite me in the ass,” my nervous companion muttered while taking labored breaths as though he were moments away from a panic attack or about to give birth.

  “Hey,” I said gently in an effort to reassure him. “We’ll be fine. Whatever you’re worried about, just relax. I’m here and I’ll take care of things like I always do.”

  It’s true. I was a fixer. There wasn’t any situation I couldn’t handle…and let me tell you, I’d been so deep in shit before that I thought I’d never see daylight again. Screw variety, danger was the spice of my life. I thrived on it. Risk fed my soul and energized me in a way that nothing else could possibly match.