Tools of the Devil

by Barbara L. Clanton

  The ride home was brimming with energy. After they changed clothes, the family ripped into their presents, and then Lisa helped her mother get the Christmas turkey and all the fixings on the table.

  Heading into a food coma, Lisa pushed her plate away from her. “Everything was so good, Mom.”

  “You helped with most of it, so thank yourself.” Her mother beamed at her and then wiped Bridget’s hands.

  “Can we go play, Mama?” Bridget asked, her eyes wide.

  “Bring your plates into the kitchen first.”

  Her siblings pushed their chairs back so fast, it made Lisa laugh.

  “Would you like some coffee, Lisa?” Her father asked.

  “No thanks. I have no room, Papa, but thanks for asking.” She hadn’t acquired a taste for the nasty stuff, but it was nice that he had asked. It made her feel grown up.

  He patted her on the shoulder and headed into the kitchen, partly to get the coffee and partly to check on the kids’ progress.

  “Mom?” Lisa said. She had been musing on something ever since the church service that morning.

  “Yes, honey?”

  “Do you think I can go to Marlee’s tomorrow? I want to work on that Bible debate for the youth alliance.”

  “Can you be back in time to help me with dinner?”

  “Yes, of course.”

  “And how about taking the kids outside to play in the snow today?”

  “Sure, sure. I was planning on doing that anyway. But, I mean, I don’t even know if Marlee’s around tomorrow. She might be working or something, or going out to see Susie.”

  She sent Marlee and Susie a text, and Marlee got back to her almost immediately, enthusiastic about getting together. They set a time for ten the next morning. After helping her mother clean up the kitchen from Christmas dinner, she bundled up the kids, and they headed outside to play in the snow. Bridget decided they needed to add a snow lady to the snow man they had made the day before. The snow was kind of icy and wouldn’t hold together very well, so they placed a small snow mound near the feet of the snowman and Lynnie said it looked like a baby. Bridget announced that the baby was Jesus and the snowman was Joseph. Maybe if it snowed again, they could build a Mary snow woman.

  Since the snow was uncooperative, they set their sights on the playground at the end of their street. It wasn’t exactly playground weather, but she knew her parents needed a break, and she was determined to keep the kids occupied for at least an hour outside. If they ran around enough, they could stay warm.

  Lawrence Jr. took off running and Bridget followed him. Lynnie kept stride with Lisa.

  “It was really weird when we went to church without you last Sunday,” Lynnie said. “Where did you go?”

  “You remember William, right?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I went to his church.” Lisa held open the metal gate to the playground so Lynnie could pass through.

  “Why?”

  How much of the truth should she tell? Lynnie was growing up fast, but she was only nine years old. Sugar coating it is.

  “He invited me to go, so I thought I’d see how other people go to church.” It was a small lie, but a necessary one.

  Lynnie was quiet for moment. “Who is William, anyway? Is he your uncle? You look like him.”

  Oh, geez, this was uncharted territory. “No, he’s not my uncle. If he was, he’d be your uncle, too, right?”

  “I guess.”

  Lynnie sat on the last remaining swing. Lawrence Jr. had draped himself face down on the middle swing, while Bridget was struggling to get in the baby swing.

  “Let me help you, Sweetpea.” Lisa picked her littlest sister up and plunked her in the wrap-around seat.

  “So, did you guys like your Christmas presents?”

  “Yeah!” Lawrence Jr. said, pushing himself higher.

  Lynnie nodded.

  “So, Lynnie, I bet all you want to do is get inside so you can read some of those books you got, right?” Lisa teased.

  Lynnie’s face lit up as she nodded vigorously.

  “How about you, Bridget? Did Santa bring you good stuff?” It had been a Dora the Explorer Christmas for Bridget with new pajamas, toys, and a backpack. Lisa guessed her mother was trying to get Bridget used to the idea of going to pre-school in the spring. “Do you like your new backpack?”

  “Yeah. I can put all my new crayons and coloring books in it. Higher, Lisa, higher,” Bridget commanded.

  “Okay, okay.” Lisa pushed her sister a little higher on the swing. She had no idea how the kids could stand the cold breeze the swings created, but they were kids after all and pretty resilient.

  “Hey, thanks for my t-shirt, you guys,” Lisa said. One of Lisa’s gifts from her three siblings was a gray Yankees t-shirt with the team emblem across the front. “I love it.”

  “I picked it out,” Lawrence Jr. said. “We bought it at Walmart.”

  “Think I should wear it to Marlee’s house tomorrow? She’s a Mets fan.”

  Lynnie chuckled. “Not unless you want to make her your enemy.”

  “Maybe I shouldn’t then.”

  “Maybe not.”

  “Hey, Lynnie,” Lisa said, “why don’t you go push Bridget on the merry-go-round?” She pulled her littlest sister out of the swing.

  “Okay.” Lynnie leaped off the swing and said, “C’mon, Bridget, I’ll push you on the round-and-round.”

  “Me, too,” Lawrence Jr. said, and was about to hit the ground running when Lisa reached out and grabbed him by the coat.

  “Hey, hang out a minute, buddy. I wanna talk to you about something.”

  He seemed disappointed, but sat back down on the swing, this time right side up. “What did you want to talk to me about?”

  Lisa sat down on the swing that Lynnie had just vacated. “Well, uh...” Now that she had him alone, she wasn’t sure what she wanted to say. She watched Lynnie grab one of the metal bars and run around the well-worn path pushing the merry-go-round faster and faster much to the delighted squeals of her younger sister. “You know Sam, right?”

  “Yeah, is she coming over?” He kicked his feet out to swing higher.

  “I wish, but not today.” Lisa cleared her throat. “Mama and Papa know about this, and I wanted you to know, too. Sam is my girlfriend.”

  “Your girlfriend? Like you kiss her and stuff?”

  “Mm hmm. And we hold hands and hug, too.”

  “Does Lynnie know?”

  “Yes. She’s known for a little while.

  He swung back and forth a few times, and then said, “Does Bridget know?”

  “No, the only thing she knows is Dora the Explorer.”

  “I know,” he said with a laugh. “It’s ridiculous.”

  “Not unlike somebody else’s obsession with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Captain America, eh?”

  “Or you, ’cuz you like softball so much.”

  “I do.” Lisa silently wished for spring to come early. The Bible debate would be over, she’d have her driver’s license, and softball would be in season. Life was always good when it was spring.

  “You know what?” Lawrence Jr. said.

  “What?”

  “I like Sam.”

  “I’m glad. I like her, too.”

  “Duh, she wouldn’t be your girlfriend if you didn’t like her.”

  Lisa laughed.

  He stopped swinging and said, “Are you going to marry her?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe one day. I think I want to go to college first.”

  “So girls really can marry other girls?”

  “Of course.”

  “And boys can marry other boys?”

  “Yep, and girls can marry boys, and boys can marry girls.”

  He stayed quiet for a few moments as if digesting this news. “Okay,” he said after an eternity. “Can I go on the merry-go-round now?”

  “Yep, go.” Lisa let out a long breath. That went way better than expected. It turned out
to be a pretty good Christmas gift.

  Lisa smiled at the sight of her three siblings playing. While the kids were occupied, Lisa took the time to muse on what approach she and Marlee and Susie should take to combat Alivia’s planned assault. Thank God Ronnie leaked Alivia’s battle plans to them. They had a fighting chance now.

  But why was Alivia so gung-ho? Maybe she was jealous that Lisa was Sam’s girlfriend. But why? Alivia was straight. Lisa groaned. Whatever. This was a Bible debate, not a personal one.

  Lisa leaped up and ran over to the merry-go-round. Lynnie squealed and jumped on when Lisa grabbed the metal bar.

  “Hang on, you guys,” Lisa called to her sisters and brother as she used her pent up frustrations to give them the ride of their lives.

  Lisa spent Christmas evening with her family watching the kids play with their new toys. She went to bed when the kids did, but she didn’t go to sleep. She wrote in her journal for a while and then tucked it in a drawer. Finally, it was time. She picked up the book she’d been waiting all day to read. The silver letters on the spine spelled out the words ‘Holy Bible.’ She ran her thumbs across the black leather and opened the book reverently.

  The pages fell open to Psalms in the Old Testament. She read a few of the psalms, enjoying the lyrical quality of the words, and found one that stirred her heart.

  “Hear the voice of my supplication, as I cry to you for help, as I lift up my hands toward your most holy sanctuary.” — Psalm 28:2

  Supplication. That was just a fancy word for a plea. That’s what her praying felt like these days. Pleas to God to help her make sense of being gay in a world that said she was a sinner. She read on and found another one to her liking. One she would have to remember as she tried desperately to find a way to take on Alivia and the rest of the world.

  “The LORD is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts; so I am helped, and my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him.” ”“ Psalm 28:7

  Chapter Twelve

  “Happy are those who find wisdom, and those who get understanding.”— Proverbs 3:13

  THE DAY AFTER Christmas, Lisa drove to Marlee’s house. She wished she had her license and not just a stupid learner’s permit, that way her mother wouldn’t have to be put out whenever Lisa wanted to go somewhere. She pulled the family minivan down Marlee’s long gravel driveway and expertly, in her opinion, did a K turn, so the van was pointed toward the street. After giving her mother a quick hug and a promise to be home in time to help with dinner, Lisa jumped out of the driver’s seat and ran to the side door of Marlee’s house. She rang the bell and waited. The big farm house had an awesome wraparound porch, and that’s where the front door was, but Marlee’s family and friends never used it. They just used the side door that led to the kitchen.

  “C’mon in, Lisa.” Marlee’s mother opened the door. “Marlee and Susie are in the basement.”

  “Thank you, Mrs. McAllister.” Lisa wiped her wet boots on the inside mat and then hung her coat up on one of the hooks. “Did you have a nice Christmas?”

  “We did. It was nice and quiet.”

  “That’s good. How’s Marlee’s grandfather?”

  “Go ask him yourself. He’s in the living room.”

  “Thanks. I think I will.”

  Lisa walked quietly into the living room, just in case Marlee’s grandfather was napping. He and Marlee’s grandmother had only intended to stay for Thanksgiving, but he had suffered a mild heart attack while trying to shovel the ever-falling North Country snow. She smiled when she saw him sitting up on the couch reading a book. It was good to see that the hospital bed was gone. Marlee’s grandmother was reading in an armchair next to the cozy crackling fire in the fireplace.

  “Hello, Mr. McAllister, how are you feeling today?” Lisa gave him a hug. She’d only met him a couple of times, but he was such a personable and kindly man that she felt like she’d known him her whole life.

  “I’m feeling well, young lady. Another week or so, and we’ll be out of my daughter-in-law’s hair.” He winked at her.

  Lisa smiled. “Well, I’m sure you’re not a bother. Your color is really good.” His skin looked healthy and pink, and his eyes were bright and focused. “How’s your energy level these days?”

  He chuckled. “You sound like that doctor friend Marlee’s mother keeps bringing home to check on me.”

  “Answer the girl’s question, Will.” Marlee’s grandmother sat stone-faced, her large-print book open in her lap. There was no mirth to her voice and no smile on her face. It was almost as if the joy of life had left her.

  “Actually, I’m feeling pretty good these days,” he said. He smiled and added, “Have fun on your project. It sounds interesting.”

  “I hope it doesn’t get the better of us.” Lisa tapped the Bible in her hand.

  Lisa wasn’t sure, but it almost sounded like Marlee’s grandmother had made a disapproving grunt. Not one to back down, Lisa turned to face her. “We hope to figure out what the Bible really says about being gay.” Okay, it felt really weird speaking so out and openly to Marlee’s grandparents, but she couldn’t help it. Although Marlee’s grandfather had been very supportive when she came out, Marlee’s grandmother was not. She hadn’t shown any support at all. Maybe Lisa was being spiteful, but she hated to see Marlee hurting like that.

  “That sounds like a lot of research,” Marlee’s grandmother said.

  “It will be, Mrs. McAllister. It will be.” It was also kind of weird having two Mrs. McAllisters in the house, but both Marlee’s mother and Marlee’s grandmother shared the same last name. Lisa wondered if she would change her last name if and when she married Sam. Lisa Anne Payton. She liked the ring to it, but then again maybe not. Papa had always been a true father to her. She wanted to honor him by keeping her adopted last name. Maybe Sam would take her name. Sam Brown. Hmm, that sounded a little too plain, and Sam was anything but plain. A pang of loneliness tickered across her chest and she felt her heart squeeze. Geez, she missed Sam so much.

  Lisa cleared her throat and said, “Well, if you’ll excuse me, I should get downstairs.”

  “Of course.” Marlee’s grandmother went back to her book.

  Lisa was about to turn and go, but something stopped her. Marlee’s grandmother looked pale and had dark circles under her eyes. “Excuse me, Mrs. McAllister, I may be talking out of turn, but you look quite pale. Are you getting enough sleep?”

  “No, she’s not,” Marlee’s grandfather said. “She’s been too busy worrying about me.”

  “I’m fine.”

  Lisa had read ahead in her Anatomy textbook about blood disorders, and Marlee’s grandmother fit all the symptoms. Including her irritability. “It might be a good idea to make sure you’re getting enough iron, okay? You could have a slight deficiency.”

  “Yes, doctor,” Marlee’s grandmother said with a genuine smile which made Lisa’s heart joyful. It was the first time she had ever seen the woman smile.

  Lisa smiled back and then hustled down to the basement.

  “Hey,” Marlee said as she leaped away from Susie on the couch. “What took you so long?”

  “Ha. I thought I’d give you two enough time to get hot and heavy with each other before we get hot and heavy into the Bible.”

  “Aay,” Susie said, “if you had been any longer, the door would have been locked.” She and Marlee exchanged a scandalous glance which made Lisa blush.

  “Okay, then.” Lisa cleared her throat. “Should I go home?” She took one step toward the stairs. She was kidding, but maybe she wasn’t.

  “No, no, no, no, no,” Marlee said and steered Lisa to a fold-up chair. “I set up this card table so we’d have a place to work.” She put a King James Bible in front of her own chair. “I don’t know how helpful I’m gonna be. I mean, isn’t the Bible just a bunch of stories written a long time ago?”

  “It’s the word of God,” Susie said, her face serious. She got up from the couch and sat at the table. “Su
pposedly.”

  Lisa held her gasp inside. She and her friends hadn’t talked much about their beliefs in God. She hoped this project wouldn’t drive a wedge between them. Lisa told herself to chill out. Marlee and Susie were there to help, not judge.

  “Here’s my Bible from home,” Susie said.

  “What version is that?” Lisa put her own brand new Bible on the table.

  “It’s a Catholic Bible.” Susie picked the book up and examined the inside cover. “The New American Bible Revised Edition.”

  Marlee, who had been fussing about getting them bottled waters and cookies, stopped what she was doing, her mouth wide open. “Wait, wait, wait. Revised Bibles? Different versions?”

  Lisa smiled. Marlee was naïve and innocent in so many things. “Yep, mine is the New Revised Standard Version. It’s the one my Presbyterian Church uses.”

  “And my Catholic Church uses this one.” Susie waved her Bible.

  “How can that be?” Marlee sat down hard in her chair. Her look of confusion was priceless. “I thought the Bible was the Bible was the Bible. The word of God. How can you revise the word of God? How can the Catholics have a different Bible than the Presbyterians?” Before Lisa or Susie could answer, Marlee sat up board straight and didn’t look at either of them. It was as if she were talking to herself. “And, now that I think about it, how can there be so many different religions? How do Buddhism, Judaism, Islam, and Hinduism fit in? And who are the Mormons? Are they Christians? And what about the ones that come to our door all the time making us pretend we’re not home?” She snapped her fingers trying to come up with the name.

  “Jehovah’s Witnesses?” Lisa offered.

  “Yes!” Marlee stabbed a finger in the air at Lisa.

  Lisa smiled at Marlee’s enthusiasm. “Both the Mormons and the Jehovah’s Witnesses are Christian denominations.”

  “Okay, okay,” Marlee said, clearly not done with her musings. “Methodists, Baptists, Episcopalians are all Christians, right?”

  “Yep,” Lisa said. “And Lutherans, Anglicans, Pentecostals, and so many more.”