Always Fraser

by A. K. Steel

  I put the key in the lock, slowly opening the door. It's quiet, unusually quiet for Jessie. Normally he would have music playing while he works, how odd. Maybe he’s out meeting a client? That's good, I need to get out of these wet clothes, and a shower would be amazing before I have to tell him the bad news. I dump my overfilled handbag on the lounge and drag my wet tired body up the stairs to our bedroom. While I shower, I’ll work out a plan. If I can work out a plan before Jessie gets home, I can show him this will all be okay.

  I’m about to push open my bedroom door but the sound I hear stops me. What was that? It sounded like someone moaning. What the fuck? I push open the door and my body breaks into a hot sweat at the sight. Jessie’s nearly naked body bent over... head buried in some girl’s pussy! What the actual fuck is going on!

  The air is thick with the smell of sex and deception. I taste bile in my mouth and feel like I’m going to be sick. He's really going to town on her, his head buried deep between her legs, his fingers moving back and forth as he finger-fucks her at the same time as he laps her up. The brunette underneath Jessie writhes, her eyes rolling back in her head. Her fingers threaded through his hair.

  They haven't even noticed I opened the door. I clear my throat loudly and her eyes rise to see me. He turns his head from his task. His dark eyes widen in fear when he sees me standing in the doorway. He jumps back from her like he's been bitten on the arse by a red-back spider.

  “Elly, w-w-what are you doing home?”

  My head is spinning. What is going on? My Jessie with his head in some chick’s pussy. This isn’t happening. I want to scream but I can't. I'm numb. Everything is playing out in slow motion. I can just hear the sound of my heartbeat, thumping in my head.

  What’s he saying to me? Pull yourself together, Elena. He’s waiting for me to say something, but what do I say? This is fucked. You fucking arsehole. How could you do this to me? I take a deep breath and say the first thing that comes to mind.

  "Wow, I guess me walking in on you must have ruined the surprise. I can only assume this must be some sort of wedding present for me, you getting lessons on how to give head properly before we got married." I smile at him sarcastically, my eyes boring into him.

  The brunette is already up, trying madly to pull on her clothes. She's shooting me a filthy look I can only assume is for interrupting them before he got her off. Sorry I'm such a fucking inconvenience, slut.

  “I’m out of here, babe. Call me when you have sorted this shit out,” she scoffs. Tossing her long dark hair over her shoulder as she grabs her bag and struts out the door, as if this is a normal situation and she hasn’t just been caught with my fucking fiancé.

  Jessie hurries over to me, reaching for my hand. “Elly, I’m so sorry, you weren’t supposed to be home till late.” His eyes plead with me to understand.

  I push him away. “Don’t touch me, don't ever touch me again. How does the fact that I’m not supposed to be home, make it okay for you to be doing that! How could you do this to me? Who is she?”

  He takes a step back and shakes his head. “She's no one, she's just a client I’ve been building a website for. It just kind of happened. It doesn't mean anything.”

  “How long has this been going on?” I scream at him.

  He looks down at the floor. “Not that long. I was going to stop when we got married.”

  "What does that even mean? Like things will be different once we're married."

  "I love you, Elly, I’m sorry, you were never meant to find out. I just needed to have one last fling before settling down. The thought of being with only one person for the rest of my life was kind of scaring the shit out of me."

  "Is that right. Well, you don't have to worry about that anymore. You can have as much pussy as you like." I pick up his pile of clothes from the floor and throw them at him.

  “Get the fuck out... get out!” I scream at him as I push him out the door.

  He stumbles backwards. “Okay, Elly, I’ll go. I’ll come back in a couple of hours when you have settled down. I promise this was nothing. It's you I want to marry and spend the rest of my life with.” He stands there looking sad and pathetic. I have no idea who this man is anymore.

  “Just get out!” I slam the bedroom door shut and pick up a photo of us from my bedside table. It's been turned upside down, I assume so his quick fuck didn't have to see it while they fooled around. I throw it across the room, smashing it into thousands of tiny pieces. I can hear the front door open and close. He's gone. My life as I know it is over. I slide down onto the floor and the uncontrollable sobbing starts.

  Eventually, I open my eyes and pick myself up off the floor. It's getting dark outside. I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting here for, but I can't stay here any longer. Not if he's coming back tonight. I weave through the broken glass, heading straight for the shower. The hot water streams down my back.

  As the steam fills the air, my walls go up. Who the fuck does he think I am? Some pushover? Has he met me? Maybe that's who I’ve become with him. Someone who lets her fiancé cheat on her and turns a blind eye. No fucking way! I’m going to pack my stuff tonight and I’m out of here. What have I got to stay for anyway? I've got no life here now. He was my world. Over the last six years, my friendships have dwindled down, and I didn’t care, because I had him. He was my best friend. How wrong was I. Now I have nothing, no friends, no job, no Jessie.

  Chapter One

  Elena

  Sweat beads on my forehead. I wipe it away with the back of my hand as I roll on the last stroke of paint. I’m done! I drop the roller in the tray underneath me and jump off the ladder, stretching my arms over my head. My back is killing me. I need to book in a massage this week, if I can make it out of my safety zone of my parents’ house. I take a step back so I can inspect my handiwork. Much better!

  The dark blue my childhood room was painted in, from my moody teenage days, was just depressing. When I was a teenager this room was my sanctuary from the bitches I was dealing with at school. A place to look up at the little glowing stars I had all over the ceiling and dream about how awesome my future was going to be as an interior stylist when I got out of this town.

  It was also a place to think of him, the boy that filled my dreams, the one I wanted so badly but could never really have. He was perfect. Not just because he was six-foot-two with abs of steel, the cheekiest smile you have ever seen, and grey eyes like silvery moons that twinkled with mischief, but because he was my hero. From the day we started high school, he was there looking out for me. No matter how bad things got, he was always there to stick up for me. Without him and my brother Drew, I wouldn’t have made it through high school.

  It's weird being back in this room. It brings back all the feelings from the past. The ones I had buried long ago. I was so busy with my life in Sydney, I had almost forgotten how obsessed I was with him... Almost.

  The last three months have taken a toll on me emotionally, and I have spent way too much time in this room locked away from reality, just thinking. I thought I would be able to pick myself back up and get on with my life, no problem, but even leaving the house has become a challenge. The more time I spend in here, the harder it is to leave.

  Today is a new day, and I’ve woken up with renewed purpose. I'm not feeling sorry for myself anymore. Today is the first day of my new, more exciting life, so why not start with a room makeover. I think my parents were glad to see a glimpse of the old me coming back to life. An hour after I announced to them that I was making over my room, my dad was there with a tin of paint, paintbrush, and roller.

  It's now an off-white which is perfect with the rustic beach-coloured timber floor. I spent the morning online shopping, and I’ve ordered a new bedroom suite and white linen bedding. I splashed out and got the most gorgeous handmade jute rug that will finish off the room perfectly, and some pop art for the walls to add a splash of colour. I’ve probably overspent, but I figure I deserve it under the circumstances.


  When the money came through from Jessie buying me out of our apartment, I had enough to do whatever I wanted. The rest I will save for starting my business. It's the most excited I’ve been since I dragged my sorry arse back home to my parents’ place in Byron Bay three months ago.

  Not quite where I thought I would be at 25, back at home starting all over again. I was supposed to be getting married this weekend, but I’m not letting that get me down anymore. The way I see it, this was just a sign that my life with Jessie was going to be shit and I’m better off without him. That's what I keep telling myself anyway. That is until I jump on Facebook and see all my friends’ perfect lives. If I see one more happy post from someone I went to high school with, saying how terrific their job is or that they just got engaged or their awesome new house is ready to move into, I'll be sick. I haven’t even bothered to call any of them. I know I should maybe attempt to get out of this house, but it's too embarrassing.

  Maybe my life being turned upside down just when I thought it was all coming together is punishment for being such a terrible teenager. I have to watch everyone else live their best lives while mine has completely turned to shit. Man, I was an awful teenager. When I look back at the way I acted towards my parents, it would not have been a fun time for them. Just another reason I’m not having kids of my own anytime soon. If they turned out anything like me, I'd be screwed.

  I’m one of three kids. The only girl, with a twin brother Drew and an older brother Theo. I always kind of felt like the odd one out. The boys were smart, sporty, and popular. They had it all. Then there was me... the arty one, who never fit the ideal student type and didn’t get good grades. I completed my schooling hiding out in our art studio, sketching or creating with my best friend Indie. That's if we were at school. We were pretty good at missing our most hated subjects and no one seemed to care too much, so we never got caught. Not the perfect little student that my principal mother expected me to be. Luckily, she was at the primary school, so she didn’t know the half of what Indie and I got up to.

  I love my mum dearly and we’re quite close now, but she has never really understood me. She was too busy fussing over my perfect brothers, especially the golden child, Drew. Lucky for me, I’ve always been Daddy’s little girl, so he is always on my side and there to get me out of trouble when I go too far.

  “Elly, are you finished up there?” Dad calls out from the kitchen.

  “Yeah, I’ll be down in a second, Dad.” I grab the roller and the paint tray and head down the hall.

  “What’s up, Dad?” He sits at the breakfast bar drinking his coffee and looking over the plans for our beach villas, his latest project.

  “I’ve got an appointment this afternoon at the station, but I have just heard from the architect who’s working on our beach villas, and he wants to come by and do a site check with his builder this afternoon. Can you show them through? It might be a good opportunity to show them what you have been working on for the interiors as well.”

  “Yeah, no worries. It’s not like I was doing anything else anyway. Did something happen at work?" I have always worried about him working in the police force, and I know Mum has had many sleepless nights worried about him as well, you just never know what they're dealing with. And now Theo has joined, I have to worry about him as well.

  "No, nothing out of the ordinary."

  I drop the paint tray on the countertop and wrap my arms around him. “Okay, but you know you can talk to me if something’s worrying you, Dad.”

  “Everything’s fine, baby girl, nothing to worry about,” he says, turning to hug me back and tuck some stray hair behind my ear. "I still can't believe you dyed it bright blue."

  I shrug, "Needed a change, not like I'm leaving the house at the moment for anyone to see what I look like anyway."

  "Whatever makes you happy, honey."

  “Thanks, Dad. Good work changing the subject too. But we’re still talking about you. What made you want to retire out of nowhere and build these beach villas in our backyard? I mean, it's not a bad idea. Byron is buzzing with tourists now so I’m sure it will work for you. It's just, you love your job.”

  “It’s just time. I can't work in the police force forever. I want to have an easier life for a bit. This is something your mother and I have been discussing for years, and now's the time.” He slides his chair out and hops up and empties his coffee in the sink.

  “The boys from The Green Door will be here in an hour so you better get yourself cleaned up. You have paint in your hair. Did you use your hair as a paintbrush? White strips over the blue is a good look,” he laughs as he wraps his arms around me, giving me a squeeze. “It’ll be a great opportunity for you to show off your talents and build a portfolio of your own. You might even get some work out of it?” Dad’s always on my side, trying to help me through whatever project I’m working on.

  “Thanks,” I smile up at him. He's a big man, and for his age he’s still super fit. All the men in my family are tall, over six feet, and obsessed with keeping in shape. At his age, he’s still up every morning at six for his run, then off to the gym. If you didn’t know him, he would be intimidating, but to me he’s just a big teddy bear. I hope he’s okay.

  “The plans are on the kitchen bench if you want to go over them again before they get here.” He grabs his keys and walks out the door giving me a wave.

  “Thanks, Dad, see you later.”

  An hour later, I’m towel-drying my hair. Was that the doorbell? I quickly pull up my ripped jeans and chuck a singlet over my bra. The architect is early, how annoying. My hair is a wet mess. I drag my fingers through it as I sprint down the hallway in a rush and open the front door.

  “Hi, sorry, I wasn’t expecting you till later.” I’m almost breathless from the run down the hall. The view I’m treated with is a surprise, he must be the builder. There’s no way this guy’s the architect. You can tell he works outdoors, with tanned skin, a broad chest, and arms that look made for heavy lifting. Don’t even look, Elena. Remember you’re sworn off men, they're all lying, cheating arseholes.

  “That's okay, I’m a bit early. I came straight from another job. I’m the builder, Blake. Our architect has been held up with another project, so he won't be able to make it.” His dark eyes burn right through me. Have I pissed him off somehow? I don’t think I was who he was expecting, he doesn’t look happy about it.

  “Did I interrupt something? Your hair is dripping everywhere.”

  My wet hair has run all down the front of my singlet top leaving it soaking wet. “Oh, yeah, it is, just jumped out of the shower.” I flip my hair up into a bun, out of the way as the beads of water run down my back.

  "Lucky it's hot today," I say with a shrug. "I’ll show you through to the building site.” I gesture for him to follow me into the house.

  “Is Jim going to be here, or should I come back later?” he mutters awkwardly, still standing in the doorway.

  “Sorry, he’s had to go out, so he’s left you in the capable hands of his daughter. Hope that's okay? I know the plans as well as he does. We’ve been working on the ideas for the design together.”

  “Oh, okay. Yes, of course, sorry. I didn’t catch your name?” He is so serious and looks annoyed to be dealing with me instead of my dad. Well tough luck, buddy, I know this stuff as well as any man so you're just going to have to deal with me.

  “I’m Elena.” I reach out and shake his hand with a firm handshake. “Come on and I'll show you through to the site.” I walk him through the house and out onto the back deck to the backyard.

  “Impressive yard,” he calls back to me, taking a look around.

  “Yeah, it was the best place to grow up. My brothers and I spent most of our time out here.”

  “Yeah, I can imagine. So, Jim wants the villas built starting from this line?”

  “That's the one. He’s got some grand plans for an outdoor patio and pool area once you're done, so it can cross over the line. Is that all going to wo
rk?”

  “No worries. I’m just going to take some measurements and have a look around. You can go inside, I don’t need you for this. I’ll let you know when I’m done.”

  “Oh, okay, I’ll just be inside then.” I probably should ask him if he wants something to drink, but his attitude towards me has kind of pissed me off so I’ll just make one for myself instead.

  I sit at the kitchen counter inside, waiting impatiently for Blake the builder to finish up. This guy is insanely hot, but he seems like kind of a dick. Oh well. Luckily I’m not looking anyway. I inhale my coffee, it smells so good.

  I look over at the yard. It really is huge. We were so lucky as kids to have this as our playground. I can't imagine what it's going to look like with these three beach villas all lined up. The pool will be nice when it's finished. I'm looking forward to that part. As kids we had it all. A massive trampoline and a swing hanging from the mango tree, and when it rained, we would get a little creek flowing down the back. We spent most of our time out there playing. My older brother Theo was the leader of all the mischief we got up to, and my twin Drew and I just followed along. The number of times I got the blame for something he orchestrated. Somehow Mum always believed him.

  The tree swing was my favourite. I wouldn’t admit this to my brothers, but I would sit in that swing and imagine we were in a fairyland. I was the fairy princess, of course, and all of my fairy friends lived up in the mango tree above. Their tiny houses were the mangos. It makes me sad to think it's all going to be torn down in the next few weeks. It feels like everything in my life is changing so fast at the moment. Things that used to feel so comfortable and safe are gone and now this yard will be too.