Jessie

by Lori Wick

"We look like her," Clancy said, having heard this many times over the years.

  "Yes, you do," Seth agreed, smiling for the first time. "I'm glad you have her blonde hair and blue eyes."

  "Where do you live?" Hannah asked.

  "I just moved back to Token Creek, and I don't have a place of my own yet. I'm staying with Rylan and Bri right now."

  "They have a baby!" Hannah said, coming uncorked. As though Seth had never met Danny Jarvik, he heard all about him-how big he was, when he learned to walk, and the last word Hannah had heard him say.

  "Why don't you live here with us?" Clancy asked when Hannah paused for breath.

  Seth had not been expecting this but was still able to answer. "I think it's good that I stay at Rylan and Bri's."

  "The dads are supposed to live with the moms," Clancy said when he was done, her brow furrowed in thought.

  "You're right. They usually do but not always."

  "When will we see you?"

  "Well, since Jeb broke his ankle, I'll be coming in to help your mom with the store."

  105Seth was not looking at Jessie, or he would have seen her raise her brows. She had not known this was the plan and would wait until the girls talked themselves out to mention this fact.

  The girls were suddenly on their feet, running to the bedroom to find things they wanted to show Seth. Before she had planned on it, Jessie found herself alone with Seth, his eyes on her.

  "They're so beautiful, Jessie, and smart and fun. You've done an amazing job."

  "Thank you." Jessie smiled a little, her eyes going to the bedroom the girls had disappeared into. "They keep me young."

  "You are young."

  Jessie shook her head without looking at him, and Seth wondered what she meant. He knew the store was ofttimes backbreaking work and marveled anew at how capable she was and always had been.

  "This is my doll' Hannah announced, placing the doll in Seth's hands. She had a porcelain head and black hair, and she wore a yellow and black plaid dress and black, high-buttoned shoes.

  "She's very nice. Does she have a name?"

  "Dorothy"

  "She's looks like a Dorothy. You named her well."

  Hannah was looking pleased about this when Clancy came running with a hatbox.

  "Oh, Clancy." Hannah rolled her eyes. "You didn't have to bringeverything."

  "Yes, I did, Hannah," Clancy started to frown and quarrel, but Jessie intervened.

  "No arguing, girls."

  Clancy managed one more fierce glare at her sister before putting the box next to Seth on the sofa.

  "Do you have a hat?" Seth asked her, but Clancy didn't answer. She was too busy unloading hertreasures.The first thing from the box was a comb for her hair, much too grown up and too large for her fine locks. Next came a small mirror, rather ornate and not very useful. Following these items came a deck of playing cards, a fan, a boy's hat,

  106JESSIE113

  cufflinks, a trinket box, and a calling card case. Almost everything that came from the box was placed in Seth's hands or lap with Clancy saying, "And look at this."

  The new father did look at everything, but when Clancy was distracted by the latch on the trinket box, he looked to Jessie with raised brows.

  "Clancyneededthings a few years ago," Jessie remembered fondly, "including the hatbox."

  "Things she spotted in the store, I take?"

  "Exactly. I eventually got her slowed down to one a week, but it was still a long summer."

  Seth's smile became huge as he turned back to Clancy, and not until that moment did he realize that Hannah was watching him in silence. Seth looked at her, so much regret filling him that he couldn't find a word to say.

  "How do you know our names?" Hannah suddenly asked.

  "I was here when you were born, Hannah," Seth said, just managing the words.

  "How about Clancy?"

  "I'm sorry to say that I wasn't here when Clancy was born, but your mother told me you gave her her nickname."

  Hannah nodded as a matter of course. "Her real name if Maryann, but I like Clancy."

  "My teacher sometimes calls me Maryann," Clancy filled in, "if I'm talking."

  "And she'salwaystalking," Hannah said, her longsuffering tone evident.

  Not sure if he should, Seth laughed. Hannah looked pleased by this and smiled.

  "Do you want to see our room?" Clancy asked. "We sleep with Mama, but we keep our things in our room."

  "Certainly," Seth agreed, having to calm his heart all over again when Clancy took his hand. He hadn't touched either of them and found that the riot of emotions going on inside of him was making it hard to breathe.

  107Jessie did not follow. She went to the kitchen and put some coffee on. It was a warm day, but she needed something to do with her hands, and coffee was the only thing she could think of.

  She hadn't known what to expect from Seth or her daughters but realized she was surprised at how well they were doing. At the same time, her heart told her it couldn't last. Seth had left before, and no matter how much he loved the girls and got to know them, Jessie was sure it was only a matter of time before he left again. She wanted to protect them from that but had no idea how.

  "You're not working on supper, are you?" Seth, who was suddenly next to her, asked quietly.

  "Just coffee. Why?"

  "I thought I'd take you and the girls to the hotel for supper. If you want," he remembered to add.

  "Have you said something to the girls?" Jessie asked just as they came from the bedroom.

  "I wouldn't do that without talking to you."

  "You don't have to do this, Seth."

  "I want to," he said and meant it.

  "I mean," she whispered, "you can take the girls on your own."

  Seth blinked. He could hear the girls and knew they were almost beside them, but still he asked, keeping his voice low, "Why would I leave you out?"

  This time it was Jessie's turn to blink. Whyhadshe thought that? "Are we going to the creek?" Hannah asked, having misinterpreted her parents' conversation.

  "I don't know," Jessie said to cover her other thoughts. "Did you want to?"

  The agreement on the girls' parts left no doubt in her mind, and so Jessie explained to Seth.

  "During the summer it's not unusual for us to go to the creek to cool off. Sometimes we take a picnic."

  "We get wet," Clancy said in her matter-of-fact way.

  "Sounds fun. Why don't I provide the food?" Seth suggested.

  108"Do you cook?" Hannah asked.

  "With my wallet," Seth said, revealing the first sign of the Seth Jessie first met and married. Not able to help herself, she laughed, and the girls even without knowing why joined her.

  Within 30 minutes they were off. It was early yet so there was no need for food, but eventually Seth left his family by the creek and headed to the hotel. By the time he rejoined them, he had amassed a feast that was not wasted. They had played hard in the sun and water and were ready to eat the beef, rolls, applesauce, and berry pie he had coaxed out of the hotel kitchen.

  After the meal, when the girls ran to rinse their hands and faces at the creek bank, Seth was able to say what was on his mind. "Thanks for letting me into their lives, Jessie."

  "They need you," Jessie said, not looking at Seth but feeling his eyes on her. She was thankful that the girls were coming right back. She was not in the mood to explain herself.

  109

  Nine

  SETH HAD TOLD RYLANand Bri about his long and wonderful afternoon, his doubts, regrets, and encouragement that the girls seemed to accept him. Bri had taken it all in, pleased that he and Jessie were off to a good start, but she had questions about her friend, questions that could not wait another day. For that reason, Bri stood at the store's back door that very evening, hoping with the windows open to the back of the building that Jessie would hear her knock.

  "Well, Bri," Jessie said with obvious surprise but still pleasure, "how are you?"


  "That's what I'm here to ask you."

  The friends' eyes met for a moment before Jessie said, "Come on up."

  "Are the girls asleep?" Bri asked as she trailed Jessie up the stairs. "They're just down. We'll have to keep our voices low for a while, or they'll be out of bed."

  The women got comfortable on the sofa, turning a little to see each other as the light began to fade from the windows.

  "How do you feel it went this afternoon?" Bri wasted no time asking the moment the women were settled.

  "I think it went well," Jessie started and then stopped. She stared at

  110Bri, who Waited patiently, and then went on. "My mind hasn't taken in that he's really here. Last Friday morning I woke up, and my life was just normal. By Friday at bedtime, things had been turned upside down. Seth came yesterday and ended up working in the store, and I still can't feel the floor beneath me. I think the world has tipped, and I seem to be the only one to notice."

  "Maybe the girls have noticed a little too?"

  Jessie shook her head in wonder. "They've taken to him so fast, Bri. Almost without question, they've accepted that he's their father. They had talked about him!" Jessie suddenly blurted. "I had no idea that they'd discussed their father, but they told me this morning that they had. They assumed he was dead and never asked me about it so I wouldn't be sad."

  Bri was as surprised as Jessie had been. Hannah and Clancy never seemed to hold back about anything. That they'd discussed something as significant as a presumed-dead father and not spoken of it was rather amazing. And Jessie! The calm, steady Jessie Wheeler was as rattled as Bri had ever seen her.

  "What now, Jessie?" Bri, thinking fast, asked. "How will you handle all of this?"

  "I guess we'll just go on. The girls want him around, and he's not difficult to be with." Jessie stopped and shook her head. "He looks so much the same-just a little older-but he's not the same man, Bri. I keep watching for the real Seth to show up, but he hasn't yet."

  "Do you want the old Seth back?" Bri asked carefully, not wanting to speak of Seth's salvation just yet. "I mean, he left you without a word for eight years. You don't wantthatman back, do you?"

  "No,but can a person change that much? It's a little hard to believe."

  "A person can change, Jessie," Sabrina said with a small smile. "One of these days, when life isn't quite so busy for you, I'll tell you just how much."

  Jessie's look became a mix of skepticism and appreciation. Clearly she thought Bri had never done a shameful thing in her life, but at the same time she was grateful for her words.

  111"Why don't you and the girls come to supper this week," Bri finally offered.

  "What night?"

  "Just pick one."

  "How about Tuesday?"

  "Tuesday it is. Seth will be there, but you haven't sounded too uncomfortable with that."

  "No, it's fine. What time?"

  "Come when you close the store. We'll eat when everyone gets there."

  "Thanks, Bri."

  "You're welcome. And don't let it slip to the girls about supper." Jessie had to laugh. When her daughters knew they were going to see Danny, their excitement knew no bounds.

  The women talked a bit longer, mostly about how busy the store was and something Bri had read in a recent newspaper article. The conversation did not turn spiritual, but Bri was used to that. Still she prayed and had hope for her friend.

  Jessie had completely forgotten that Seth had said he was coming to help with the store, but he was good at his word. Much as he'd done on Saturday, he was on the porch when she opened the store.

  "Hello," she said, sounding distinctly cooler than the last time he'd seen her.

  "Hello."

  "I don't know if there's enough work for you to stay," Jessie said without warning, and Seth nodded, watching her. She turned and went back inside, slipping behind the counter. Seth followed slowly.

  Seth glanced around a moment, seeing that things were in good order, but he wasn't willing to leave quite so fast. Instead he said, "I have some memory of you saying there was always something to do."

  "For me, yes, but not always for two people."

  112Again Seth nodded, but he was willing to bide his time.

  "I seem to remember that you had a hard time getting to the books,"

  he tried next. "Why don't I watch the store while you do that?"

  Jessie gave him a direct look and asked, "Don't you have anything

  better to do?"

  The one word completely disarmed her. She hadn't expected this. And in truth, she didn't know why she was fighting him. He'd certainly proved on Saturday that he still knew his way around the store.

  "I guess I could work on the books," she said after a few minutes, her voice back to normal.

  "Okay," Seth agreed, forcing himself not to sound pleased. "If something comes up that I can't handle, I'll come find you."

  Jessie stared at him a moment, and Seth stared right back. He wanted to ask why she didn't want him around right now but knew they could be interrupted at any moment. As it was, she didn't give him time. Moving around the edge of the counter, she disappeared into the storeroom without another word.

  "What are you doing?" Hannah wanted to know when she found her father behind the counter not ten minutes after he arrived. He was restacking a few piles of mail that had yet to be claimed.

  "Good morning, Hannah," Seth said, not sure if her question was directed at the moment or his being there at all.

  "Does Mama know you're back there?" Hannah persisted. "She does. She's working on the books this morning."

  "Do you know how to work with the mail?" Hannah asked, coming close enough to climb onto the counter and stare up at him. "I do. I used to work here a lot."

  ."I didn't know that," Hannah said, sounding a bit suspicious and a lot like her mother.

  113"Do you help out around the store?" Seth asked, hoping to change the direction of the conversation.

  "All the time."

  "That's great. Does Clancy help too?"

  "She dusts."

  "I'm glad to hear you girls are so helpful."

  "When did you work here?" Hannah asked, now sounding like the child she was.

  "A long time ago, when your mother and I first met."

  "Mama's parents owned the store," Hannah said.

  "I remember her telling me about them."

  "You didn't know Grandma and Grandpa Wheeler?"

  "I'm sorry to say I didn't. I think your Grandpa Wheeler had been dead only about a year when I met your mom."

  "Where did you meet her?"

  "Right here at the store. She gave me a job."

  Seth was certain that Hannah's questions would have continued for the next hour, but a woman came in and Seth was given the excuse to leave his daughter so he could wait on her. He wasn't afraid to tell Hannah the details she wanted to know, but he thought such questions should be asked in front of her mother. Seth knew that Jessie was suspicious of him as it was. He had no intentions of doing anything behind her back or giving her any worry on that account.

  In fact, just as soon as he had a chance, he darted into the storeroom to talk to her.

  "Some of the questions I expected the girls to ask me yesterday came pouring out of Hannah this morning. She wanted to know how we met and if I'd known your parents."

  "Is that a problem?" Jessie asked, not sure what she was missing. "I don't mind telling her any of it, but I wanted you to know that we'd talked some more."

  Jessie nodded with understanding, and in her heart she really did appreciate his coming to her, but he need not have worried.

  "Actually, as I was falling asleep last night I wished I had warned

  114you. That's how they are sometimes. Give them a few days to think on something, and you won't hear the end of it for a while."

  "Do you want me to wait until we're together to tell them things?" Before he could say anything else, Clancy found them.

  "Hey, Seth,"
she started without preamble. "Hannah says you sorted mail."

  "I did, yes. Did I do a good job?"

  Clancy did not take the red herring. She questioned Seth until she was sure he was right for the job and then went on her way. Not until Clancy moved off did Seth notice Jessie's face.

  "You're enjoying this," he accused.

  Jessie tried to look innocent, but Seth could see right through it. He might have had something more to say to her on the topic, but someone was calling from out front.

  Jessie didn't allow a full-blown, satisfied smile to stretch her mouth until after he'd left the storeroom.

  Seth didn't know when he'd been so tired. There had been no break all morning. If it wasn't a customer, it was one of his daughters asking questions or telling him how to do something. At one point Seth was ready to snap and ask the girls to leave him alone, but then he caught himself. He was going to have to tell Jessie that he needed a dinner break soon, but for the moment he chose to calm down and think about why he'd come back.

  Not long after he'd trusted in Christ,Cassyhad written to him about a verse in the first chapter of Luke. He'd not committed it to memory, but he recalled that it said something about turning the hearts of fathers to their children. He didn't know why, but it seemed that men often deserted their children. His father had certainly not stayed around to know him.

  Now on the job so many months later, Seth remembered Cassy's letter and the verse and began to enjoy the interrogation of his daughters.

  115That they might not always be respectful was becoming very clear to him, but it was not the first issue that had to be covered. Their love and trust for him was.

  "Are you going to dust up there?" Clancy asked. She'd come upon Seth when he was next to a section of very tall shelves. "It's high for Mama."

  "I'll tell you what," Seth suggested. "Why don't you run get the feather duster, and I'll lift you up so you can dust it."

  Clancy's eyes got huge before she ran to find the duster. Seth was not surprised when she was back in little time, looking up at him expectantly.

  "Ready?" Seth asked, looking down into her face with a sensation in his heart he'd not felt before.

  "Ready!"

  "All right," Seth said, swinging her up onto his arm. "I'm going to set you on my shoulder. If your arm can't reach, I'll lift you higher."