Kilo : being the love story of Eliph' Hewlitt, book agent
Page 9
CHAPTER IX. The Witness
When Eliph' Hewlitt reached the Briggs house, he did not hesitate, butwalked right up to the front door and rang the bell. A minute later hesaw the red silk that obstructed the pane of beveled glass in the upperpart of the door drawn ever so slightly to one side and then quicklyreplaced. He caught the glisten of an eye, as the red silk was heldaside, but the door did not open. Miss Sally, after the brief glance,tiptoed back through the hall. She did not want to meet the book agent.
Eliph' waited a respectable minute and then rang the bell again,although he had little belief that this would bring Miss Sally to thedoor. It is good form to ring the bell of the front door several times,before going to the back door, for it may be that the lady of the houseis dressing, or is hastily taking the folded paper "curlers" out ofher front hair, or slipping on her "other skirt" before admitting thevisitor. Few indeed are the front doors in Iowa that open promptly to aknock or a ring. Primping time must be allowed, and if this, followedby a second ring or knock, does not open the door, nothing but businesspermits the visitor to go to the back door. Having waited, Eliph' wentto the back door. It closed almost as he reached it, and it would notopen to his most vigorous knocking.
To know a person is in a house, and not to be able to reach that person,is annoying, and Eliph' had often had this happen to him. The usualcourse was to go away and return again; returning a third or fourthtime, or until the door at last opened; but Eliph' was not merely tryingto sell a copy of Jarby's Encyclopedia of Knowledge and Compendium ofLiterature, Science and Art this time. He had no time to waste in theusual manner. If he could not get into one house to sell a book, hecould enter another house and sell a book, but when a man is after acertain heart he does not care to go to another house and take anotherheart. Some men do it, but they are usually sorry afterwards. Eliph'walked to the front of the house again, and looked at the front door.
He felt there should be some way to get into the house and have fiveminutes' conversation with Miss Sally. If this Colonel and this Skinnerhad already had months or years of opportunity for pressing their suits,there was not time to be lost, and the sooner he began the sooner hewould win. But none of his ordinary methods of entering unwilling houseswould serve his purpose this time. It would not do to begin by makingMiss Sally unfriendly. So Eliph' tucked his book more snugly under hisleft arm and looked at the house. He walked to the gate and looked up atthe roof; walked across the street and viewed the house in perspective;but nothing useful came of it, so he crossed the street again and triedringing the doorbell once more. He rang it sharply and waited. Then heknocked and waited. He was willing to wait until the door opened, andhe leaned against the porch railing and waited, ringing the doorbellinsinuatingly, or commandingly, or coaxingly, from time to time.
Meanwhile, the attorney waited until the half hour he had assigned wasup, and then walked toward Miss Briggs' house with briskly business-likesteps.
"Now, some folks," he said to himself, as he walked, "wouldn't get anyfun at all out of a case like this, but I do. That's the way to keepyoung. It's why I don't grow stale in this town. It is a small puddlefor a toad of my size, but I hop around and keep things stirred up."
As he neared the house, he saw the Colonel approaching from the oppositedirection, and he waved his hand to him, and the Colonel hurried to meethim. They turned into the yard together, and saw Eliph' Hewlitt restingeasily against the porch railing.
"Nobody's at home?" asked the attorney.
"Yes," said Eliph'. "Somebody's home, but they don't answer the bell.
"Book agent?" said the attorney. "Well, you can't blame them, much. Gemsof literature aren't always wanted."
The Colonel scowled. He felt a personal interest in Pap Briggs' money,and he resented any attempt to part the old man from any of it. Hesuffered almost as deeply at tax time as Pap himself did, and heconsidered the money Sally had to pay in installments on Sir WalterScott as practically thrown away, and that she might as well have takenit out of his own pocket. He knocked on the lower step of the porch,with the side of his ax, angrily.
"You git out of this here yard!" he ordered. "I don't want no bookagents a-hangin' around here, an' I won't have it. You clean out ofhere!"
Eliph' coughed lightly behind his hand, but the words of reproof that heintended to launch softly at the Colonel were never spoken.
"Well, this IS lucky!" cried the attorney, holding out his hand toEliph'. "Colonel, this is the best luck we could have had. Here we needa witness, and here we have him right on the spot! I was going to stopand get Skinner on the way down, and then I thought maybe, from what yousaid, you and Skinner were not very friendly, so I didn't, and now I'mglad I didn't. We find a witness right here on the porch, just as if hehad been ordered to be here. I call that a good omen."
The Colonel was not pleased, and he showed it, but he really had nothingthat he could urge against this book agent, so he said nothing. Theattorney rang the bell, and Miss Sally, having peeped out to see themeaning of so many men on her porch, recognized the Colonel and theattorney, and opened the door. The attorney stood back to let Eliph'enter, and then followed him in. The three men stood in the littlehallway, hats in hand, while Toole explained why they had come, and MissSally led the way to the second-floor room where the box stood.
It was an impressive scene as the four gathered around the box.
"Knock off the lid!" said the attorney firmly. The Colonel raised his axand struck. The board splintered but remained firm. "Legally," said theattorney, "you may strike three blows."
At the third blow a portion of the lid fell clattering to the floor, andthe three men and Miss Sally peered anxiously into the box. From it theColonel tenderly lifted a nickel-plated cylinder, as tall as a man'sknee and as large around as a leg of mutton. It had a convex top, and onone side a dial. From near the base a long rubber tube extended.
The Colonel handled the thing gently. He held it in his hands as anold bachelor might handle his newborn nephew, and Miss Sally lookedanxiously into his face, appealing for enlightenment. The Colonelstudied the thing carefully, and then looked into the box again, andback at the glittering object in his hands. There were three moreexactly like it in the box.
"What is it?" asked Miss Sally nervously. It looked explosive.
The gingerly manner in which the Colonel handled the dangerous-lookingthing aroused her suspicions. She backed away from it. Eliph' Hewlittopened his lips to speak, but the attorney motioned him to be still.
"Don't you know what it is?" Miss Sally asked, appealing to the Colonel.
"Yes," said the Colonel, but he still looked at the glistening affairwith doubt. "Oh, yes! But I can't see what that there young feller wasdoin' with four of 'em. I can't see what he was doin' with 'em anyhow.Mebby," he said, "he was agent for 'em."
"He was agent for 'most everything I ever heard tell of a man bein'agent for," said Miss Sally, "but I wish you'd tell me what they are."
"Well, ma'm," said the Colonel, "this is fire-extinguishers; patentchemical fire-extinguishers. I know because I recall seein' some oncewhen I was down to Jefferson. They had 'em in a theater there. They putout fires with 'em."
"Well!" exclaimed Miss Sally. "How do you ever suppose anybody would putout a fire with a thing like that?"
The Colonel turned the affair over and over.
"I didn't study that up," he admitted, "but I guess if I take time Ican find out how the thing works. They squirt out of this here tubesomehow."
He turned up the end of the tube and squinted into it. Again Eliph'Hewlitt was about to speak, but the attorney caught his eye and winked,and the little book agent held his tongue.
"Well, land's sakes!" exclaimed Miss Sally, "What am I goin' to do withfour fire-extinguishers, I'd like to know?" She asked the question asif the Colonel had got her into this thing of the ownership of thefire-extinguishers, and she looked to him to take the responsibility. Hewas quite willing to accept it.
"I've got to think t
hat over," he said. "A feller can't decide right offhand what to do with four fire-extinguishers. It looks to me as if theywas worth a lot more than the young feller owed you, Miss Sally. Theyain't no doubt about Miss Sally havin' a right to 'em, is there, MisterToole?"
"Not a bit of doubt!" exclaimed Toole cheerfully. "She has every rightin the world. You've got a witness that they came out of that box, andshe can sell, give, donate, assign, or bequeath them, for better or forworse."
"Then that's all right," said the Colonel, "an' I guess that's all weneed you for."
"Except to settle the witness fees with this gentleman," said Toole,turning to Eliph', who was still eager to say a word or two. "But mebby,if I have a word or two with him, I can fix it up without making anyexpense for you."
He drew Eliph' to one side.
"What's the cost of that book you're selling?" he asked. "Well, I'lltake one. I don't take one for a bribe, but because I can see you're notthe sort of man that would sell a book that wasn't worth the money. Iwant that book. And just you keep still about those fire-extinguishers.Between you and me, those are first-class nickel-plated lung-testers,and not fire-extinguishers. But that doesn't matter. There's justabout as heavy a call for fire-extinguishers in Kilo as there is forlung-testers. Can you keep still about it?"
"I can," said Eliph' Hewlitt, "and you'll never regret having bought acopy of Jarby's Encyclopedia of Knowledge and Compendium of Literature,Science and Art. It is a book that should be in every man's hand, andin every home. If you owned a copy now, you would know is value to man,woman, or child. I was going to try to sell one to Miss Briggs when youcame, and if you could help me to----"
The attorney smiled. This was the sort of game he enjoyed. "Don't tellabout the lung-testers," he whispered, and turned to Miss Sally. "MissBriggs," he said, "will you let this gentleman have a few minutes ofyour time? I want him to show you a book he has. It is a book thatshould be in every home. If you will give him a few minutes."
He did not wait for Miss Sally to answer, but turned to the scowlingColonel.
"Colonel," he said, "I want you to walk down to the office with me. Ishouldn't wonder if you could sell those fire-extinguishers right herein Kilo."
The four descended the stairs together, and the Colonel would willinglyhave lingered, but the attorney took him by the arm and jovially steeredhim out of the door. Miss Sally, too, would gladly have had the Colonelremain, to protect her from the book agent, and to say "no" when theappeal to buy was reached, but Eliph' retreated into the darkness ofthe parlor, and took a seat in the corner of the room, and Miss Sally,unable now to escape him, seated herself as far from him as she could.