Kilo : being the love story of Eliph' Hewlitt, book agent

by Ellis Parker Butler

  CHAPTER XVI. Two Lovers, and a Third

  The attorney, when Eliph' walked down the path to the gate, entered thehouse, and found Miss Sally still sitting in the dark parlor where shehad had the painful interview with Eliph' Hewlitt. She still held herhandkerchief to her eyes, for she had been weeping, and the attorney wasnot sorry to see this evidence of the stress of her interview with thebook agent. Certain that Eliph' had told Doc Weaver of the lung-testers,he was no less certain that the book agent had been telling Miss Sallythat the nickel-plated affairs would be thrown back on her hands, and hehastened to urge resistance.

  "Miss Briggs," he said, "I came right in, because I knew what that bookagent was here to say to you, and I wanted to warn you against him. Iknow what he asked, and I hope you refuse him."

  Miss Sally gasped.

  "I believe," continued the attorney, taking a seat, "that you refused,because you know which side your bread is buttered on. I believe thatbefore the day is over Colonel Guthrie will come with the same question,and I want you to give him the same answer. And if Skinner should comeon his knees, I want you to send him away with the same answer, too.They will all have arguments enough, but don't be fooled. They money isall they want."

  Miss Sally gasped again. She was astounded.

  "I could see," said the attorney, confidentially, "that you have thebook agent a pretty sharp answer, and that was right. He had no businessto put himself forward at all, and I don't suppose you can guess why hedid."

  "He said he liked me," said Miss Sally weakly, ashamed to mention theword openly. The attorney laughed.

  "My opinion is that it is an conspiracy," he said. "That is just theword, a conspiracy, and T. J. Jones is at the head of it. The book agenthas come first; now the Colonel will come; and then Skinner, all askingthe same thing, but my idea is that they are all in partnership, andthat Jones is engineering the whole thing. They want your money, andthat is all they want, and once they get it they will be happy and youwill be left with four lung-testers on your hands."

  Even in Kilo slang comes and goes as in the rest of the world and MissSally was not sure about the word "lung-tester." It had a slangy sound,and it must be a term of reproach applied to the future value of thefour men Toole had mentioned. She accepted it as such.

  "All I have to say," continued the attorney, "is to refuse the Colonel,and to refuse Skinner if he comes, just as you have refused this bookagent. Stick up for your rights. If they want to sue you, let them sue.You have the money now, and it is better to have that than a lot ofgood-for-nothing lung-testers. Once you get them on your hands you'llnever get rid of them."

  He arose and took up his hat.

  "That is all I have to say," he said, "but I wanted to let you know whatyou ought to do. Don't mind if there is a lot of stuff published in theTIMES. You have to expect that, and Jones will probably drag yourname into it, in connection with the Colonel and Skinner, but you areperfectly innocent and they can do nothing to you."

  He went out, and Miss Sally remained in a daze, looking at the doorby which he had gone. She was still looking at it helplessly when Mrs.Tarbro-Smith came in with a swish of skirts and put her arm gently abouther.

  "DO you think you did what your heart told you to do, dear?" asked thelady from New York, kissing Miss Sally on the brow. "He was SO downcast.I really pitied him, poor man."

  Miss Sally threw her arms around Mrs. Smith's waist and hit her facein the lacy softness of her gown, and wept. The authoress smoothed thebrown hair and waited patiently for the tears to cease.

  "Did you see Mr. Toole?" she asked brightly, to ease Miss Sally'sweeping and to turn her thought to other things. "He wanted to see youabout those fire-extinguishers. But I don't trust him. I think he hassome plan or other that is selfish. I think he had been drinking."

  Miss Sally's tears ceased, and she sat up, straight and severe.

  "Fire-extinguishers?" she asked quickly.

  "Yes," said Mrs. Smith; "he seemed to think Skinner or the Colonelor someone would want you to take them back. And return the money, Isuppose."

  "The money?" echoed Miss Sally slowly. She blushed as she saw that shehad misunderstood the attorney, thinking he had dared to advise in herlove matters, and then she frowned. "The money?" she repeated. "ButI gave that money to pa. Pa won't ever give that money back, never! Idon't know where on earth I'd ever get sixty dollars."

  As she spoke she heard someone on the walk, and then the heavy feet ofthe Colonel climbing the porch steps. She heard him ask Susan if MissSally was inside, and heard the girl answer that she was, and she heldMrs. Smith's hand tighter.

  "Come in," she called, to the knock on the door, and the Colonel stumpedinto the room. He was hot and angry, so angry that he did not stop tooffer his usual curt greetings.

  "Look here," he said, by way of introduction, "you an' yourfire-extinguishers has got me into a purty fix, Sally Briggs--a blamepurty fix-an' I want to know do you intend to git me out or not? I don'twant no foolishness. Skinner is after me an' I've got to pay him backthem sixty dollars, or somebody'll go to jail for it. You ought to haveknowed them wasn't nothin' but lung-testers, afore you set me up tosellin' 'em to Skinner, an' not let me go an' make a 'tarnal fool outof myself. But that ain't the thing now; the thing is, will you payback them sixty dollars? I guess you'd better do it, an' do it quick.Skinner'll have the law on ye if ye don't."

  Miss Sally drew back toward Mrs. Smith as he scowled at her.

  "Now, you git them sixty dollars an' hand 'em over to me, that'swhat you'd better do," said the Colonel. "I want to git shut of thisbusiness. I was a fool fer meddlin' in a woman's affairs in the fustplace. I don't want to have no more hand in it. You git me that money,an' let me fix it up with Skinner. He's mad, an' he won't stand nofoolin'. It was all I could do to keep him from comin' in an' makin' arow right here in the house. He's waitin' at the gate till he sees if Igit the money, an' if I don't----"

  "But I haven't got sixty dollars," Miss Sally gasped. "I gave that moneyto pa. I don't know whether I can GET sixty dollars out of pa."

  She was so helpless that Mrs. Smith's blood boiled at the rude brutalityof the Colonel, and she stepped forward and faced him.

  "What is all this about?" she asked. "What is the matter with thosefire-extinguishers? Why do you come bothering Miss Sally this way? Whydon't you settle it with Mr. Skinner yourself?"

  "The matter is, them ain't fire-extinguishers at all," said the Colonelrudely, "an' wasn't, an' never was. Them things is lung-testers, an'Sally was cheatin' Skinner when she sold 'em to him. An' the reason I'mbotherin' her is that she got the money fer 'em, an' she's got to findit somehow an' pay it back. An' as for me settlin' with Skinner, I ain'tgot nothin' to do with it. I wasn't nothin' but Sally's agent. I doneher a favor, an' that's all, an' I'm sorry I ever meddled in it."

  "But there certainly can't be such haste needed," said Mrs. Smith. "MissSally is not going to run away. Mr. Skinner is not going to fail forwant of sixty dollars, is he? You can wait until to-morrow, or to-night,when Miss Sally can see her father."

  "No, I can't," said the Colonel doggedly. "I can't wait at all. Byto-morrow mornin' that newspaper feller will have another paper printedup, an' I hear tell he's goin' to give us all plain names, an' I ain'tgoin' to wait. I want to git this thing fixed up right now. If Sallyain't got sixty dollars, let her go borry it. I got to pay Skinner rightnow, an' I want Sally to pay me. I want to git shut of this."

  "I don't believe Mr. Skinner is in any such hurry as you pretend!"exclaimed Mrs. Smith. "I don't believe he is so ungenerous. I believe heis more chivalrous, I believe HE will have some manliness, if you havenot."

  She started for the door, but the Colonel grasped her by the arm.

  "Hold on, here!" he said, but Mrs. Tarbro-Smith merely raised hereyebrows and looked, first at his hand on her arm, and then at his face,and his hand fell. He stood irresolute and uncomfortable as she went tothe door and called to Mr. Skinner. The butcher walked up to the door,clearing
his throat as he came. Mrs. Smith held the screen door widefor him to enter, and he walked into the parlor, holding his hat in hishands, and stood uneasily.

  "The Colonel," said Mrs. Smith pleasantly, "has told us you wishMiss Sally to return the money you paid for what she supposed werefire-extinguishers."

  "They was nothin' but lung-testers," said the butcher.

  "So it seems," said Mrs. Smith, "and it is odd that a man of businesslike yourself should not know it in the first place. But of courseMiss Sally did not know what they were. Who told you they werefire-extinguishers, Sally?"

  "The Colonel," said Miss Sally, and the Colonel moved his feet uneasily.

  "Indeed!" exclaimed Mrs. Smith, giving the Colonel another of herparalyzing glances. "But Miss Sally will do whatever is right. Shehasn't the money at this moment. You can wait until to-morrow for thesixty dollars, can you not, until she can see her father?"

  The butcher grew red in the face, redder than his naturally highcoloring, but he shook his head.

  "I want it now," he said. "Business is business." And after a moment headded, "It wasn't sixty, it was one hundred. Four at twenty-five, that'sone hundred. One hundred dollars, that was what I handed Guthrie. I paidone hundred and I want one hundred back."

  Miss Sally and Mrs. Smith looked at the Colonel.

  "I had a right to make a commission," he blustered. "I ain't no sichfool as to do business fer other folks an' lose time by it. I took out acommission, an' I had a right to, an' I don't want to hear no more aboutit. A commission's fair."

  "You didn't say anything about it," said poor Miss Sally. "Mrs. Smithwas just surprised to learn of it."

  "Surprised, my dear?" said Mrs. Smith, "No, indeed. Nothing that manwould do could quite surprise me. But forty percent commission! MissSally hasn't sixty dollars in the house," she added, turning to thebutcher. "You know very well people here don't have so much in the houseat one time. If I had it I would gladly lend it to her, but I don'thappen to have so much with me to-day. You can wait until Mr. Briggsgets back from Clarence, or you can do what you please."

  "I want the money," said Skinner doggedly.

  "Very well," said Mrs. Smith. "Collect forty from the Colonel. That willkeep you from starving until to-morrow. And now will you both kindlyleave the house?"

  "Now, look here, Mrs. Smith, ma'm," said the butcher. "You ain't got anyright to talk that way to me. Money matters is money matters, and a manhas a right to look after his own the best way he can. I was cheatedout of one hundred dollars by this man and Miss Sally, as easy as youplease, and there's bribery in it, and land knows what. But I ain'tmean. All I want is my money back, and I want it now. I hear T. J. Jonesis going to get out an extry to-morrow morning all about this, and allI want is to do what is right. Hand me back my hundred dollars, and I'llgo to T. J. and explain that Miss Sally did what was right, and tell himto leave her out of what he writes, but if I don't get the money I won'tsay a word to him. He can guess all he wants about Miss Sally and theColonel being in cahoots with this bribe business. All I want is mymoney."

  "But I say you shall have it in the morning."

  "Well, I don't count much on what you'll get out of Pap Briggs. Youmight get ten cents, if he was feeling liberal, but he don't usuallyfeel that way. What I want is one hundred dollars right now. I don'tneed no lung-testers, and I've been cheated, and I won't wait. If MissSally ain't going to pay me, I'll see what the law says about it."

  "Mr. Skinner," said Mrs. Smith, "in consideration that Miss Sally is alady and that you are a gentleman, will you not wait till to-morrow?"

  "Business is business," he said flatly. "When I'm sellin' meat I ain't agentleman, I'm a butcher; and when Miss Briggs was sellin' lung-testersshe wasn't a lady, she was in business. Business is one thing an' bein'pleasant is another. I've got to look after my money or I soon won'thave any."

  When the two men went out Mrs. Smith could hear them begin to wrangleeven before they quitted the yard, but she was more interested in whatmight happen to Miss Sally through the vindictiveness of the butcher.She was surprised to hear that T. J. Jones had even thought of such athing as bringing Miss Sally's name into the matter as a conspirator,and she did not know enough about Iowa laws to know whether the butchercould take any summary action or not. The most satisfactory way tostraighten things out would be to pay the butcher, but it must be doneat once. She pleaded with Miss Sally to remember someone of whom shecould borrow sixty dollars, but Miss Sally confessed that she knew noone who would be apt to lend so much. She even expressed her doubt thather father would ever release the money she had given him. The two womensat in the darkened parlor, Miss Sally weeping softly and Mrs. Smiththinking hard. The authoress was ashamed that she could devise no way toaid her friend, and there they sat, exchanging a brief word from timeto time, and the gloom deepening every minute. Presently, when theatmosphere was so charged with sadness that it was almost too thick tobreathe, Mrs. Smith called to Susan, and the girl came in.

  "Sue," said Mrs. Smith, "will you run down to the TIMES office and seeMr. Jones? And--let me see--and tell him I very much want to see himbefore he begins to print his extra. You won't mind, will you?"

  "Oh, no," said Susan cheerfully, and she went, a fairy in filmy white,while the two women relapsed into gloom again.

  So softly did the next comer mount the porch stairs that the two womendid not hear him until a gentle tap on the door frame, followed by anapologetic cough, announced the return of Eliph' Hewlitt.