The Devil in the Saddle

by Julia London

  “I figured out I don’t need to be there. I’m only going to one class on campus and the rest is online.”

  “Wait,” Luca said, appearing from Ella’s little kitchen. “You’re not giving up—”

  “I am not,” Hallie said, bristling a little, although it was a fair assumption to make, given her history of giving up. “I have a very firm plan to finish school and open a studio, all by myself. I am changing my location. And if you guys are building a house, why not let me rent this?”

  “Sure,” Ella said.

  Luca looked at his fiancée. “Don’t you want to think about it for even a minute?”

  Ella smiled at him and patted his cheek. “Nope.”

  Everything was falling into place, and now Hallie had to tell Rafe, and sooner rather than later. She just wanted to know how he felt about her first, especially after she’d hurt him like she had. So she came up with a plan to show him how great it could be, the two of them, if he still loved her. She was going to gently guide him into thinking it was his idea.

  Just like Grandma had guided Grandpa.

  Her first opportunity came when she ran into Rico at the ranch, and he’d gushed about how amazing Chicago was, and how brilliant his brother was for coming up with such an idea. Hallie had seized the opportunity to gush, too, telling Rico that Rafe had inspired her, and she was doing something similar. Except with ballet.

  “Really?” Rico had seemed a little too surprised, frankly.

  “Tell you what. Get Rafe and come and see. You guys can help me hang a few things.”

  So they came, and they were here now, walking around her warehouse. Rafe was a few steps behind Hallie and Rico, eying her with a little bit of suspicion and a little bit of amusement as she showed Rico every nook and cranny. “You know, when I found out Dad left me these warehouses, I didn’t know what I would do with them. But they’re so convenient to Three Rivers and San Antonio. And cheap. The renovation is hardly costing me a thing.”

  Rico and Rafe exchanged a look.

  “Too bad you didn’t have this in Chicago,” she said breezily. “If you’d stayed here, you could have opened your gym right next door.” She pointed to the east wall and the adjoining warehouse. “You could have had it for free!”

  Rico’s eyes widened. Rafe frowned. “It wouldn’t be free. There would be rent and renovation costs.”

  “Oh, Rafe,” she said, laughing. “I own these warehouses outright. Who needs rent?”

  She could have used the rent, but that was beside the point.

  “I think there’s already a program like ours around here,” Rico said. “Didn’t you work with them one year, Rafe?”

  “It wasn’t quite the same as ours,” Rafe said. “And there definitely isn’t anything like what we could do for wounded soldiers.”

  Rico and Hallie looked at him. “What wounded soldiers?” Rico asked.

  Rafe shrugged. “Just an idea.” When he noticed Rico and Hallie continuing to stare at him, he waved his hand. “My pal John Horowitz—he could use a program like ours.”

  “The guy with no legs?” Rico asked. “The one in San Antonio?”

  “The guy with one leg,” Rafe corrected him. “I told him I’d help him out. It’s not impossible for wounded soldiers to practice martial arts.”

  Rico’s brows rose to his hairline. But Hallie saw an opening—a door opened so wide that the sun was shining through it.

  Next, she coerced Luca into inviting Rafe to Ella’s house for dinner.

  Luca groaned. “Don’t get me involved.”

  “Involved in what?” Hallie asked.

  “Hallie, just tell him how you feel about him.”

  “What? I don’t—you are—” She choked. “He’s just a friend,” she insisted.

  Luca rolled his eyes. “Whatever, Hallie. You invite him if you want to spend time with him. It’s not like Rafe and I hang out.”

  “Well, maybe you should. He’s a nice guy. And if I invite him, everyone will think it means something. Like it’s a date.”

  “Oh, and we can’t have that,” Luca said, folding his arms.

  “Your imagination is running wild, Luca. Just do it. Please.”

  Luca gave her a good once-over, then sighed. “Fine. But you owe me.”

  “You’re acting like I’m making you walk over hot coals.”

  “Ella’s not very social, okay?” he said, and walked out of her room. “But I’ll do it!”

  Rafe, Luca later reported, was reluctant. But he finally agreed to come when Ella asked.

  Hallie didn’t know how to take this report, but decided she was not going to be dissuaded. She would have called the whole thing off if she hadn’t been carrying his baby. “I thought Ella wasn’t very social,” Hallie said.

  “She likes Rafe,” he said. “Everyone likes Rafe,” he added, sounding a little miffed by it. “And she likes you, too, Hallie.”

  “Who doesn’t?” Hallie asked, and batted her eyes at him.

  So Rafe came the night of their little supper party, and Ella took him on a tour of the little house with the two bedrooms, the single bath, living room, and kitchen. The house had new floors, a new roof, and new paint, and the kitchen had been spruced up with modern appliances.

  “Nice,” Rafe said, looking around. His gaze fell to the door leading out of the kitchen to the back porch, where a thin screen separated them from a pig, a dog, and a couple of chickens in the background. “Are those the prairie chickens?” Rafe asked.

  Hallie laughed. Luca glared at her. “Just chickens,” he said somberly, and then launched into an explanation of how important prairie chickens were to returning this ranchland to its natural state. Rafe seemed interested, so of course Luca warmed up to him then.

  Over burgers, Luca asked about Rafe’s project in Chicago.

  “We’ve run into some unexpected expenses,” he said.

  “Oh?” Hallie asked, perking up. For Rafe’s sake, she didn’t want to hope there was big trouble in Chicago. But she hoped there was big trouble in Chicago.

  “The building codes and the system to get renovations approved is insane and expensive,” he said. “More than we bargained for.”

  “That sucks,” Ella said.

  “It does. It’s lost a bit of its sparkle for me. Surprisingly, Rico loves it. It’s the first time I’ve seen him excited about something, you know?” He looked up. “And he’s sober. He’s poured himself into the work and is learning about it.”

  “That’s amazing,” Hallie said.

  Rafe offered to help Ella clean up. “Great,” Luca said. “Hallie, you’re with me. We have animals to feed, and if you haven’t fed Priscilla, you’re in for a treat.”

  “I can’t wait,” Hallie said. But when she stood up, she felt queasy. “Just a minute,” she said, holding up a finger, hoping it would pass. Nope. It wasn’t passing. “Excuse me.”

  She hurried to the bathroom.

  When she finally came out, Luca was standing on the other side of the door, his arms crossed. “What the hell? What’s the matter with you?”

  “Just a bug or something.”

  “Really? Because I just watched you eat a cheeseburger in like three bites.”

  “I was hungry,” she said, and looked past him to see if anyone was listening. “A person can’t be hungry when she has a bug?”

  “Hallie.” Luca stepped closer. Hallie stepped back. “You know you can talk to me about anything.”

  Oh Lord, Luca had guessed the truth, and he was going to want to know who the father was, and she was going to have to lie because no way was she telling Luca before she told Rafe. “Listen—”

  “Just tell me the truth, please, and I’ll do whatever I need to do to help you.”

  “It’s sort of hard to explain.” How could she possibly explain anything with
Rafe not thirty feet from where they stood?

  Luca frowned. “So it is an eating disorder?” he whispered, looking appropriately horrified.

  “An eat—” Hallie launched herself at him and pummeled his chest. “Are you insane?” She shoved him away, yanked on the hem of her shirt, and stepped around him.

  “It was just a question,” he said as he followed her outside to feed the animals.

  “It was a stupid question!”

  With the kitchen cleaned and the animals fed, Rafe thanked Luca and Ella and said he had to get home. “I’m taking my mom in for some tests in the morning.” He grabbed his jacket and thrust his arms into it. “Thank you—I really appreciate the meal.”

  “Good luck in Chicago, man,” Luca said.

  “Wait!” Hallie said. “Can you give me a ride home?”

  “I’ll take you home,” Luca suggested. “I’m going there anyway.”

  Hallie shot a look at her brother, but Ella, bless her, understood the girl code even if she didn’t understand what was happening. “Actually, Rafe, that would be a big help. We’d drive her, but I don’t feel so well.”

  “Is something going around?” Luca asked, looking between Hallie and Ella.

  “Sure,” Rafe said, because he was the sort of man who would not refuse the request of his host. He opened the door.

  Hallie put on her coat and picked up her purse. “Thank you so much for everything,” she said to Ella.

  “We should do it again.” Ella put her arm around Luca’s waist and leaned her head against his shoulder. “Take care!” She shut the door, and they could hear Luca ask her if she needed him to get some TUMS for her.

  Rafe looked at Hallie. “What’s going on?”

  “What? I need a ride, that’s all.”

  “Uh-huh,” he said as they walked down the porch steps to his truck. He opened the passenger door for her, and when she was in, he went around and got in behind the wheel. “Nice evening,” he said. “I haven’t hung out with Luca since we were kids. I really like him and Ella.”

  “Well, I obviously like them, too.”

  He smiled. “It was nice spending time with you, Hallie. I’m grateful that we can still be friends.”

  Friends. Fortunately it was dark, and he didn’t see her anxiety.

  “So Ella said you were going to rent her house,” he said as they pulled onto the road. “What about school?”

  “I’m not quitting! I have a plan, and I will finish.”

  He said nothing.

  She looked at his hand. She wanted to hold it, to press it against her heart.

  “I like Ella’s little house. I can just picture it after you put your mark on it. Flowers hanging upside down from the ceiling. Broken champagne glasses. Fancy dresses used as planters.”

  “Ah, Rafe,” she said. “You really do get me. And I get you! You should seriously think about using my warehouse space if the Chicago thing doesn’t work out.”

  He chuckled. “The Chicago thing better work out—I’ve sunk most of my life savings into it.”

  They had reached the end of the county road, and Rafe put on the turn signal to turn right.

  Hallie felt a little frantic. She didn’t want to go home just yet. “Can we get some ice cream?”

  “You want ice cream?” he asked, sounding surprised.

  She didn’t really want ice cream. “Yes. Dairy Queen.”

  He smiled. “If the lady wants ice cream,” he said, and he turned left and drove into Three Rivers, straight to the Dairy Queen.

  The ice cream place was busy. Kids in red aprons and hats ran cones and floats out to cars. Hallie ordered an ice cream cone. Rafe declined. It was a busy night at the Dairy Queen, and the cone was taking a while to get to them.

  “Do you miss Texas?” Hallie asked curiously as they waited.

  Rafe looked out the driver’s window. “I guess I do. It’s pretty damn cold up there.”

  Another moment of silence ticked by. Then he asked, “How is it with you and the doc?”

  “Done and dusted,” Hallie reported. “I told him I’d get a restraining order if he didn’t cut it out.”

  Rafe chuckled.

  “I’m serious,” Hallie said. “What about you, Rafael Fontana? Have you met anyone up there in cold Chicago?”

  He slowly turned his head to look at her. “Seriously?”

  “Why do you look like that?”

  “Like what?”

  “Like I asked if you were kicking puppies or something. You’re a guy. Sooner or later that itch is going to hit, and I happen to know from personal experience that your itch is pretty insistent when it hits.”

  “Not fair,” he said.

  “Why not?”

  “Because, Hallie, it’s only been a few short weeks since you . . .” He pressed his lips together.

  “You can say it,” she said quietly.

  “Since you sent me on my way. How’s that?”

  That was not what he meant to say, and she knew it. There were so many things she wanted to say to him. Like how she loved him. How she needed him. How her feelings for him hadn’t lessened since they’d been apart, but had only grown. “I’m really sorry about that,” she said softly. “So sorry. I thought I was doing the right thing.”

  “Don’t worry about it,” he muttered, and rolled down his window to a kid with an ice cream cone. Rafe handed her the cone, paid the kid, and then looked at Hallie. “Don’t choke on it, now.”

  He put the truck into gear and drove while Hallie half-heartedly ate the ice cream she really didn’t want now. Rafe was still nursing his hurt, and she didn’t know how to fix it.

  He turned through the ornate gates of the ranch, coasted down the drive, and parked near the front of the house so Hallie could pop inside.

  She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “Thank you for the ice cream.”

  “Welcome,” he said, inclining his head graciously.

  They sat there, staring at each other, and it felt to Hallie like a million sparks were passing between them. A million unspoken words. She couldn’t help herself; she twisted around in her seat. “Are you ever going to forgive me?”

  “There is nothing to forgive,” he said.

  They both knew that wasn’t true. “Are we ever going back to the way we were?”

  Rafe smoothed a bit of hair from her face. “I don’t know, Hallie. It would be nice if we could, but I don’t know.”

  He had to know. She needed to know. “I really do miss you,” she said, and then suddenly pitched forward and kissed him on the lips.

  But when she started to pull away, he put his hand on the back of her head and kept her there, deepening the kiss, and shifting in his seat to meet her halfway. He kissed her like she’d kissed him the first time. As if he’d been lost without her. As if he’d been waiting for just this moment. The kiss was frighteningly arousing, and Hallie feared she might be only moments away from ripping off her clothes and straddling his lap. She slid her hand into his shirt, to skin so warm to the touch, and he responded with a tiny sigh of contentment—

  Light suddenly flooded the cab. Motion detector lights threw the spotlight on them, and both of them gasped and wrenched away from each other. Rafe sat up, peering out the windshield. “Cat,” he said.

  “Cat? We don’t have a cat.” She leaned forward. She clucked her tongue as a big black-and-white cat sauntered by. “Mr. Creedy’s.” She pressed a hand to her chest. “I feel like I’m fifteen all over again and making out with Jason Park.”

  “You made out with Jason Park?”

  Hallie nodded.

  “I made out with his sister, Emily.”

  They both started to giggle, which quickly escalated into gales of laughter. Rafe put his arm around Hallie’s neck and kissed her temple. “You’re one of a kind
, Hallie Prince.”

  “So are you, Rafe Fontana.” She smiled at him, waiting. She thought this was the moment he would confess that he still loved her, and Chicago was too cold, and they could live at Ella’s and raise a baby and a pig, and they would be so happy.

  But he didn’t say that. He reached across her and opened the passenger door.

  “Is that it?” she asked.

  He smiled so sadly that Hallie’s heart lurched. “I won’t make the same mistake again, Hal.”

  “Oh,” she said weakly. “Okay.” She looked at the door. “How long are you in town, anyway?”

  “Another week. Mom has some doctor appointments.”

  “Well, could you maybe come by the warehouse this week and help me install the ballet barres?”

  Rafe’s gaze narrowed a little. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but don’t you have an entire construction crew to do that?”

  Rats. “I have an extra one I decided to install. It’s in the garage. So will you?”

  Rafe rubbed his neck.

  “I’ll take that as a yes,” she said, hopped out, gave him a tiny wave, and ran into the house.

  When she stepped inside, she paused just inside the door, her back to it, listening to his truck drive away.

  Hallie closed her eyes. She loved him so much she ached with it. She wanted him to love her just like that, so hard that he ached. God, but she’d made a huge mistake. She’d mortally wounded him, she could feel it. She’d left him in the gazebo because she’d needed to figure out her path. Well, she had, and her path included him, but she didn’t know if he would ever trust her enough to believe that it did. And even if he never did, she was going to have to tell him about the baby. She desperately wanted him to truly want to be with her before she did. She didn’t want to spend a lifetime guessing if the baby was the reason he was with her.

  She took several deep breaths, pushed away from the door, and walked into the kitchen.

  “There you are.”

  Hallie shrieked, and clapped a hand over her heart. Her mother was sitting in one of the chairs near the fireplace in the breakfast nook. “You scared me to death!”

  “Sorry.”