Paper Love

by Jae

  Anja didn’t like eavesdropping, but she couldn’t help herself. Under the pretense of getting a roll of tissue paper from the stockroom, she opened the door, sneaked into the back rooms, and lingered in front of Nobby’s tiny office.

  Voices drifted through the door, and she could easily identify Susanne’s precise, confident tone. “I haven’t finished my review yet, so it’s too soon to make any real recommendations, but one thing is clear: you’ve got to cut your costs.”

  Nobby said something Anja couldn’t understand.

  “Well,” Susanne answered, “if push comes to shove, it might become…”

  Anja didn’t catch everything, so she leaned closer.

  “…let your employees go.”

  What? Anja nearly hit her head on the door. Susanne had seriously marched in there to tell Nobby he should fire her and Felix, the student who helped out in the store on Saturdays? What a bitch! She should have known Susanne would be the type who got her kicks from firing people. Good thing Nobby would never in a million years go for this…would he?

  Nobby answered, but his voice was too soft for her to make out the words. His tone, however, spoke loud and clear: it sounded defeated.

  God, no! Her knees became wobbly, so she caught herself with her damp palms against the door. Please don’t let this coldhearted beast tell you how to run your business.

  Susanne spoke again, but now it sounded strangely warped and distorted, like an old cassette tape that had been played one too many times.

  Anja sucked in a steadying breath to ward off her rising panic. She didn’t know how long she’d been standing there, trying not to hyperventilate, when the door beneath her hands started to move.

  She jumped back, but it was too late to pretend she’d been heading toward the stockroom.

  Susanne stood in front of her, those cool gray eyes assessing her the same way she’d looked at the Meisterstück Solitaire earlier. “Frau Lamm?”

  “I…I, uh…” Past Susanne’s shoulder, she caught a glimpse of Nobby, who sat slumped behind his desk. “I wanted to ask if it’s okay if I take my lunch break now.” She needed to get out of here—now.

  “Oh, yes, yes, of course. Go.” For the first time ever, Nobby didn’t smile or make eye contact. “In fact, why don’t you both go to lunch? I’ll hold down the fort until you’re back.”

  Anja knew him—he wanted to be alone to think about whatever his niece had told him. She wanted to stay behind and talk him out of following her advice, but she’d already told them she would be heading out for lunch. Under Susanne’s watchful eyes, she didn’t have a choice. She grabbed her messenger bag from behind the cash register and fled.

  Susanne walked along the cobblestone street, glad to escape the little store for a while. Telling a company’s owner that it might become necessary to fire people was never easy, but usually, she could hide behind the shield of professionalism. Not this time. The devastation on her uncle’s face made her stomach feel as if it were a sheet of paper that someone had crumpled into a little ball.

  Oh, now you’re using paper analogies? She definitely needed to take a step back and regain a healthy emotional distance—starting with having lunch, even though she’d lost her appetite. She’d just grab a quick bite somewhere and then head back to the store to see if Uncle Norbert was ready to talk about the steps necessary to save his business.

  Enticing scents drew her to a food court that had been set up in what appeared to be an old newspaper building. The aromas of dishes from all over the world—Persian, Afghan, Brazilian, Mexican, Chinese, Italian, and German—made her mouth water, but the court was incredibly crowded, and she wasn’t in the mood to eat squeezed in between strangers at a tiny bar table, so she walked on.

  The bells of the Münster, the cathedral towering over the Old Town, announced that it was one o’clock. Wasn’t there a farmers market with food stands at the Münsterplatz? That should be quick.

  Susanne headed in that direction. The scent of fresh flowers and frying onions greeted her before she had even reached the square. The crowd of shoppers had thinned, and most of the vendors were already packing up their fruit, vegetables, cheeses, breads, and homemade jams, but the sausage stands along one side of the Gothic red sandstone cathedral were still doing good business.

  Maybe Uncle Norbert should invest in a food trailer instead. With a wry smile, she got in line and tried not to feel bad for her uncle or Frau Lamm. There was no place for sentimentality in business.

  For several minutes, Anja wandered aimlessly without paying the slightest attention to where she was going. If it hadn’t been for the finely honed instincts of someone who’d lived here for years, she would have probably stepped into a Bächle too. She followed one of the narrow canals through an alley and ended up at the Münsterplatz, with the towering cathedral in its middle.

  The vendors were packing up their goods, talking to each other in Alemannic. The soft tones of the dialect she’d grown up with were as soothing as a hug, so she strolled along the edges of the farmers market.

  As usual, the trailers of the sausage vendors were soon the only stands remaining. They never seemed to have a problem attracting enough customers, locals and tourists alike, so there was still a bit of a crowd surrounding them. Maybe she’d soon be back to selling sausages too, the way she had right after moving to Freiburg. The supermarket she’d worked for back then had put her behind the meat counter without caring that she was a vegetarian.

  Why were some people so cold and uncaring? Anja would never understand people like Susanne. Frau Wolff, she corrected herself with a huff.

  As if conjured up by the mere thought of her name, Susanne appeared in front of her as the crowd parted. She stood just a few steps away next to one of the food trailers, her mouth wide open, about to bite into one of the popular long, red sausages that were served in a bun. Just as she took a bite, their gazes met.

  Susanne froze, and so did Anja.

  Someone ran into her from behind, shoving her forward and into Susanne.

  Mustard splattered everywhere, and a few fried onions dropped onto the cobblestones. Susanne nearly choked on her bite of sausage and started to cough.

  Just when she’d thought the day couldn’t get any worse. “Oh God. I’m sorry. Are you all right?”

  “Fine,” Susanne wheezed. A gob of mustard grazed her elegant scoop-necked top, right where her wool coat stood open.

  Anja reached out with a tissue from her pocket.

  “Um, thanks. I can do it myself.” Susanne took the tissue from her and used it to dab at the stain on her chest.

  “Oh.” Anja withdrew her hand. Her cheeks burned. God. You nearly rubbed her breast! If Susanne hadn’t already threatened to fire her, she probably would have done so now. Anja pretended to be busy checking herself for mustard spatter just so she wouldn’t have to look her in the eyes.

  Susanne crumpled up the tissue and threw it and the rest of the bun into a nearby trash can, as if Anja’s appearance had spoiled her appetite. “Are you here for a sausage too, or…?”

  “No,” Anja said before she could think about it. “I don’t eat meat.”

  “Ah.”

  Anja hated that judgmental “ah” she encountered all too often, but she held her tongue. Now was not the time to fight that battle. She had enough on her hands fighting for her job already.

  “So you’re here because you followed me.” Susanne made it a statement, not a question.

  “What? No! I just…” Anja trailed off since she couldn’t very well admit that she’d wandered around upset because she had overheard what she had said to Nobby.

  “You what?” Susanne pierced her with those gunmetal gray eyes.

  Anja squirmed. God, this woman could push her off her stride much too easily. But enough was enough. She wouldn’t be able to bear the strain of waiting for days until someone finally told her what the heck was going on, so she decided on the direct route. After all, Susanne already planned on firing
her, so what else could she do to her?

  She firmly planted her feet on the cobblestones, bracing herself. “Why do you want to take over Paper Love if you don’t even like stationery?”

  “What? Who said I want to—?”

  “Oh! I get it now!” Anja put her hands on her hips, leaned forward, and glared at her. They were almost nose to nose now—well, nose to chest because of their height difference—and Anja did her best to focus on her anger and not on the distracting closeness of Susanne’s admittedly nice breasts. “You want to toss out the pens and paper and sell smartphones or sushi or something.”

  “I don’t even like sushi,” Susanne said with an annoying calmness.

  God, this woman was maddening. “That’s not the point! You—”

  “Let’s get one thing straight. I don’t have any intention of staying here in Freiburg to take over the store, not for sushi and not for anything else.”

  “Then why do you want Nobby to fire me?”

  Susanne slid her hands into the pockets of her slacks and rocked back on her heels to give Anja a disapproving look. “Do you always eavesdrop on your boss’s conversations?”

  “No! Of course I don’t.” For some reason, Anja didn’t want her to think that. “I just… I couldn’t help myself. I needed to know what’s going on.”

  “Oh, come on. Surely you knew it was coming.”

  “How was I supposed to know? Nobby was always happy with my work, and our customers really seem to like me. It was only when you came in and—”

  Susanne cut her off with an impatient wave of her hand. “This isn’t about you or me. Don’t think I’m having fun doing this.”

  “Could have fooled me,” Anja muttered under her breath.

  Susanne fixed her with a sharp glare. “I get that you need to be angry with someone, but that kind of attitude won’t help save the store.”

  “I’ve worked at Paper Love for fourteen years. Of course I’m angr… Wait a minute! Did you just say…?” Anja couldn’t breathe. Tunnel vision set in, and all she saw were the clear gray irises in front of her. “S-save the store? Are…are you saying…?”

  “Come on,” Susanne said, now much gentler than before. “Let’s go find a place to sit and talk.” She walked around the cathedral to the three steps that formed the pedestal for a sandstone statue in front of the main portal.

  Dazed, Anja followed her like a meek little lamb being lured away by the big, bad wolf, no longer caring if she’d be eaten alive.

  Since there were no benches or other seating options nearby, Susanne pointed to the sandstone steps at the base of a statue.

  Frau Lamm plopped down as if all the strength had drained from her legs.

  Susanne sat next to her, close but not touching. Providing comfort to an employee who might have to be let go wasn’t part of her job description, but Frau Lamm had gone very pale and she was still her uncle’s employee, so for now, Susanne was responsible for her well-being.

  She patiently watched Frau Lamm’s face and waited until the dazed look had cleared from her eyes.

  Finally, Frau Lamm took a shaky breath and half-turned on the step to look at her. “Are you saying Paper Love is in trouble?”

  Susanne nodded. “Trouble with a capital T, I’m afraid.”

  “Can we…I don’t know, do a special sale or something?”

  “You don’t understand. The store isn’t just short a few hundred euros, and it isn’t just this month. You’re nowhere near breaking even, and you haven’t been in years.”

  “Years! But…but…Nobby never indicated that we’re in financial trouble. He always paid me on time.”

  “With his personal money if need be,” Susanne threw in.

  Frau Lamm gulped audibly. She put both elbows on her thighs and leaned her head onto her palms. Her golden brown hair fell forward, forming a curtain around her face and hiding it from Susanne as if she couldn’t bear to be seen at her most vulnerable.

  “You didn’t know?” Susanne asked quietly.

  Without looking up, Frau Lamm shook her head.

  “Really? Excuse me for saying so, but I find that a bit hard to believe.”

  Frau Lamm looked up. Her vulnerable-looking doe eyes narrowed, and she squared her slim shoulders. “Are you calling me a liar? Are you always this suspicious of everyone, or is it just me you don’t like?”

  Susanne’s mouth moved, but it took several seconds before she was capable of answering. It wasn’t often that someone confronted her like this, and she certainly hadn’t expected it from Anja Lamm. She held up her hands, palms out. “This isn’t personal at all.”

  “Oh yes, it is. This is as personal as it gets for me! Paper Love is a big part of my life. It is my life. If we go under…” Her voice became even huskier than normal with every word and then broke.

  God, no tears, please! Susanne never knew how to handle those, especially not in situations that were supposed to be unemotional and professional, so she charged ahead. “So you really want me to believe you had no clue? Come on. You’re not stupid. You must have noticed that people aren’t exactly beating down your door to buy stationery.”

  “Of course I noticed! But it’s not that we don’t have enough customers. The store can get busy at certain times of the day. I knew we weren’t getting rich, but with Nobby owning the place so we don’t have to pay rent, I thought we must at least be getting by.”

  “It’s not the number of customers; it’s that you have the wrong customers buying the wrong stuff. You can’t survive on the two cents you make off a greeting card and a cheap ballpoint pen. Didn’t you ever see the numbers?”

  Frau Lamm shook her head. “Nobby doesn’t like putting the store’s numbers into a computer. He’s pretty old-school in that regard.”

  “Yeah, I noticed. I’ve seen that thing he calls a cell phone.”

  A weak smile tugged on Frau Lamm’s lips. “I nicknamed it the brick.”

  Susanne laughed and was glad to hear her chuckle a bit too. “Yeah, that’s what it looks like. So you never saw his business ledgers either?”

  “No. Nobby always told me he wanted me to focus on the customers and the stationery, and he would take care of everything else. He didn’t even tell me you’d be coming, probably because he knew I’d start asking questions that he wasn’t ready to answer.” She sniffed.

  Did she see it as a betrayal that he had kept her out of the loop?

  Frau Lamm stared up at the saints and apostles decorating the cathedral as if hoping for the patron saint of nearly bankrupt stationery stores to intervene. Finally, she directed her attention back to Susanne. “So that’s why you’re really here, isn’t it? Because we’re in trouble.”

  “Yeah. That’s what I do for a living—I help companies in trouble…or advise them to close down, if need be.”

  Frau Lamm gave a decisive shake of her head. “Not Paper Love. There has to be another solution. What can we do to save the store?”

  “Well, there’s two sides of the equation,” Susanne said, glad that they were back to discussing business strategies instead of dealing with emotions. “Either you have to cut back costs, or you have to increase revenue.”

  “We.”

  “Pardon me?”

  “We,” Frau Lamm repeated. “You keep saying you.”

  Susanne wasn’t sure she understood. “Yeah. Something wrong with that?”

  “Paper Love isn’t just any store. It’s your uncle’s lifework—and your grandfather’s before him. Shouldn’t it mean more to you than the other businesses you’ve worked for?”

  Now it was Susanne’s turn to stare up at the saints above the cathedral’s entrance just so she didn’t have to look into those brown eyes. This was exactly the kind of entanglement she’d been trying to avoid. Finally, when the silence went on for too long, she directed her gaze back at Frau Lamm. “It does.”

  “Good. Then we’re in this together.” Frau Lamm held out her hand, clearly expecting Susanne to shake it.
>
  Reluctantly, Susanne placed her hand in Frau Lamm’s. Her fingers were cool—either from the January temperatures or because she was afraid of losing her job. Engulfed in Susanne’s bigger hand, Frau Lamm’s felt almost fragile, and Susanne fought the urge to cradle it in both of hers. No coddling employees, remember? Frau Lamm’s handshake was surprisingly strong for such a slight woman, so maybe she wasn’t the type who needed coddling anyway, despite the way she looked.

  “Let’s go back to the store. We can talk while we walk.” Frau Lamm stood and pulled Susanne up with her by their still-linked hands.

  When she let go, Susanne curled her fingers against her now-empty palm.

  “Come on.” Frau Lamm strode across the square like a soldier on a rescue mission.

  Hell, when had she lost control of this situation? Susanne shook her head and hurried after her.

  With her hand on the brass handle of Paper Love’s front door, Anja paused. She had entered the store thousands of times, but now that she knew its very existence was in danger, it felt different somehow. Oh, come on. This isn’t a funeral. Not yet anyway.

  “Everything okay?” Susanne asked behind her.

  Anja turned. “Yeah. It’s just…” How could she explain?

  As if sensing what stopped her, Susanne gently reached past her, pushed the door open, and stepped forward to lead the way into the store.

  “Wait!” Anja pulled her back around. “You have a bit of onion on your, um…” Very nice breasts. She pointed. “Your shirt.”

  “Oh. Thanks.”

  Anja tried not to watch as Susanne picked off the piece of onion and flicked it away. At least this little episode had distracted her from the hopefully premature feeling of sadness that had gripped her. Yeah, well, I suggest you look for another distraction. Remember that she wanted to get you fired.

  She forced herself to step into the store and pretend she would get to do so multiple times a day for the next thirty years. “Could you keep an eye on the store for a minute? I’d like to check in with Nobby.”