Green Planet

by Anthony E. Southby

  The boys sat on the opposite side of the riverbank, coughing and spluttering their lungs out. Both of them were feeling dizzy from their near drowning experience, as if trapped in a bad dream. After a short period of desperate breathing and calming themselves, the boys felt less lightheaded and their pale complexions returned to normal. Frank looked to his right and noticed Gallica standing quietly beside him, staring with forced concern.

  Immediately he realized that he was sitting in his underpants, and hastily pulled his legs inwards, blushing with embarrassment. Gallica giggled sweetly, amused by the boy’s flushed red cheeks.

  ‘Wh-where are my clothes?’ Frank stammered shyly.

  ‘Oh zyour clothes, zey are over zere on ze other zide, oui,’ Gallica said with a chuckle, pointing to the other side of the riverbank. ‘Let me fetch zem for zyou, oui.’

  ‘P-Please,’ Frank answered, clutching at his legs nervously. The four fairies zipped across to the other side of the river and gathered the boys’ clothes and shoes together, and handed their belongings to them.

  ‘Ag, this stuff stinks!’ Azor complained, holding the sweaty garments at arm’s length from her sensitive fairy snout.

  The boys grabbed at their grubby school outfits and placed them on in a hurry. The amused flower fairies watched intently while the boys quickly dressed themselves.

  ‘Do you mind?’ Frank snapped, forcing both legs into the same trouser leg in a frustrated hurry.

  ‘Actually, we don’t mind at all young man,’ Lily Madonna replied, smiling sweetly and turning to face the other way. ‘We don’t mind at all my boy; I must say, you put on a most delightful show.’

  ‘Very funny!’ Frank barked.

  ‘There, none of us are looking now,’ Azor chirped, bobbing beside the other fairies, amused by Frank’s over sensitive behaviour.

  He muttered to himself in anger while fitting a smelly sock.

  ‘It won’t help you to get upset Frank, we’re both screwed,’ Philip sighed, his hands trembling while he buttoned his shredded bloodstained school shirt.

  ‘Those flippin Floran flower fairies can go to blazes as far as I’m concerned!’

  ‘You have seen their strength Frank; what chance do we have of survival, getting on the wrong side of them?’

  ‘I don’t know! I don’t care either! I’ve had enough!’

  ‘Calm down! For goodness sake, calm down!’

  ‘They knew about those water creatures, I know they did! And what’s more they just left us to drown!’

  ‘I guess so.’

  ‘To make matters worse, they’ve dumped us on the other side of the river, so we can’t even try and escape, unless we want to be river monster’s lunch.’

  Frank sprang to his feet and marched towards the group of giggling fairy beasts.

  ‘Why did you take so long to save us?’ Frank roared, his eyes demanding an immediate answer.

  The four fairies choked on their wicked scheming, and turned to face the raging schoolboy in surprise.

  ‘Take so lung? whut ya mean, mun?’ Paulina questioned his sudden outburst, flying straight towards him with a demanding glare.

  ‘Y-yes, why did you take so long to save us?’ he repeated, stammering with uncontrolled rage.

  ‘Wut are ya saying mun?’ Paulina replied, looking shocked. ‘We neva saw ya drownen in da furst place. Wat sort of monsters da ya take us fur, mun?’

  ‘You are evil just like everything else on this treacherous planet!’ Frank screamed, stamping his foot in anger.

  ‘Calm down Frank!’ Philip exclaimed, trying his best to shake him back to his senses. Azor swiftly flew forward, her pale icy blue eyes glaring daggers at Frank.

  ‘If this is the kind of thanks we are going to get for saving your lives, then the pair of you can rot on this planet with no protection at all.’

  With those final words soaked in poisonous hate, Azor beckoned her sister fairies to follow, and all four flew off with folded arms and smug faces.

  Frank was already familiar with this kind of psychological behaviour and despised them all the more for it, throwing resentful schoolboy insults after them in rage.

  Philip looked around, knowing all too well that they were between a rock and a hard place, trapped on the wrong side of that dreaded river with no place to run to.

  ‘What are we going to do now Frank, there’s no place to go?’ he moaned, looking mournfully over the quiet valley. ‘And I’m absolutely starved.’

  ‘I dunno, but I won’t tolerate their nonsense any longer; I’ve had enough of those fairy goons.’

  ‘What choice do we have Frank, unless you want to starve to death?’

  They watched the flower fairies fly off into the distance, and were starting to feel overwhelmed by the wicked chill that possessed the valley. The deceitful fairies offered the two a strange sense of comfort, not something that could easily be described, something strangely captivating and alluring.

  ‘Okay Philip, they win; you can call them if you want,’ Frank said, breathing a heavy sigh. He was feeling quite uncomfortable at the thought of having to face them again, but what choice did they have? Philip yelled after them, literally begging for help.

  ‘These earthlings are so foolish my dears,’ Madonna spouted, ignoring the teenage whine. ‘They are always so plagued by their consciences. I’m so glad we don’t have one of those, whatever that may be.’

  The four turned to face Philip’s mournful whimpering, grinning from ear to ear.

  ‘Oui, zey have taken ze bait, let’s go and fetch zem,’ Gallica said, quite enjoying the game.

  ‘As long as we make them feel bad first, exploit their soft earthling hearts, if you know what I mean?’ Azor cackled, raising a fairy eyebrow.

  The fairies returned with arms folded, looking deeply upset. They had to be given credit for their superb lying ability; they were absolute masters at it. Much against his better judgement, Frank played along with the reprimand he received from Azor.

  The boys were absolutely starving, and thoughts of the delicious pinana enjoyed the day before only increased their hunger pains. They were so hungry by then that they were even prepared to risk their lives for a good meal.

  They followed after the now friendly flower fairies, who promised them special treats once they arrived at their not too far off home.

  ‘Here we are, my boys, here we are then!’ Madonna announced, gesturing towards the leafy abode in high-pitched delight. The fairy home was positioned in a large recess on the upper slant of the plush green valley, consisting of several gigantic fern type leaves sprouting inwards on either side, encompassing the ditch to form cool shady enclosed housing, which allowed partial light to flow through its leafy roof.

  The flower fairies hovered excitedly in front of the large wax green leaf entrance, spreading it aside for the anxious boys to pass through. Philip hastily removed his crumpled yellow and black striped school tie from his pocket and tossed it to the side of the floral abode unnoticed. If Chimzen by some chance flew past on the Malco board, he would have to be left with some clue or other of their exact whereabouts.

  * * * * * * * *

  ‘Cum in boys, mun, cum in.’ Paulina welcomed the boys, sounding slightly over enthusiastic. Frank and Philip stepped cautiously into the tranquil dwelling. It was evenly set with bands of gigantic ferns that reflected spellbinding rays of luminous green light, and was structured in an “L” bend with a large boulder positioned on the left side at the turning point.

  ‘Wow!’ the boys exclaimed in chorus, amazed by the marvellous spread before them. The ground was covered with a heaped bed of soft leaves, scattered with the signature of violet, jasmine, rose and lily flower petals. The sweet perfume scent was almost far too wonderful for a pair of grubby schoolboys, and had possibly been laid out to simply disguise the stench of sweaty clothing. In the centre of the scented bed lay a large spread of unusual and foreign fruit. The boys sat with mouths watering, staring at the delicious looking fruit
, and noticed the odd pinana in between. The fern enclosure was wide and pleasantly spacious, with a low lying length of oak plank mounted to the side at a height suitable for fairies. Four tiny fairy chairs were tucked beneath, all neatly carved with foreign symbols.

  ‘What’s that?’ Frank asked, noticing a strange looking pot plant seated at the end of the long table. The plant consisted of two large velvety dark green leaves with a most unusual large pod type flower. The pod was completely oval at the back, but the front end came to a sharp point, and looked very much like a beak. It was brightly coloured with thick tropical orange, red and yellow stripes.

  ‘That my dear, is a parrot plant,’ Madonna announced, beaming with pride while she pranced over to the table where the colourful plant sat quietly. ‘He is my prize possession.’

  Much to Frank’s amazement, the parrot plant spread its colourful floral beak open, and mimicked Lily Madonna to perfection.

  ‘Now I’ve seen everything!’ Frank gasped, his eyes almost popping out of the sockets. ‘A talking plant, what next?’

  ‘Patroux is my prize possession boys, and I would appreciate it if you treated him with the utmost care during your stay here.’

  ‘Of course, Madonna! Of course!’ Frank exclaimed, nodding his head vigorously.

  ‘What a ridiculous name for a talking plant,’ Philip muttered.

  The exhausted pair sat down on the sweetly-scented bed of leaves, lying back for a moment to soothe their aching limbs. After a short period of rest and relaxation they greedily chomped away at the unusual fruit, satisfying their aching hunger pains. The foreign tastes, combined with ravenous hunger, made the fruit an adventure to the taste buds. Sweet juices flowed down their necks and mashed nango pulp (cross nartjie and mango) oozed down their wrists as they gobbled the scrumptious manna from heaven.

  ‘What’s this, Frank?’ Philip asked, looking amused. He held up a strange looking dark purple fruit by the stalk. It had a hard smooth texture and was roughly the size of a tennis ball.

  ‘Let me have a taste,’ Frank said, grabbing it from Philip and greedily shoving the purple specimen into his mouth. ‘Ah yes, it tastes like a crunchy grape, yummy, here, you try some.’

  Philip grabbed the dripping sweet ball from his friend and bit into the other side.

  ‘Yes, it’s like a cross between a grape and an apple.’

  ‘Must be a grapple then,’ Frank chuckled, chuffed with his own sharp wit.

  ‘Mush be,’ Philip answered, choking on a mouthful of grapple pulp, and spewing the purple contents over his smelly shirt.

  The fairies left the boys alone to enjoy their meal – most probably their last one at that – for they had other more important matters to attend to.

  Chapter 19

  ‘It’s those blasted flower fairies!’ Chimzen announced in horror, standing to his feet and looking a bit shaken. ‘They are the rulers of this forsaken planet, and those boys are in serious trouble.’

  ‘Oh no!’ the trio squeaked in chorus, having had first-hand experience of the wicked flower fairies in the past.

  ‘They have set up a magic smokescreen, which has fogged the view of their exact whereabouts. All I can see is that they have headed off in the direction of the valley; other than that it’s just an infernal rainbow haze.’

  ‘We must hurry, trio, before something terrible happens to them, if something hasn’t happened already by now, that is.’

  Without any further orders, they bounced into hoverboard formation, and flew off towards the valley with Master Chimzen standing firmly in position.

  ‘Just be extremely careful, Malco balls, those wicked creatures will be expecting us, and goodness knows what tricks of treachery they have up their sleeves.’

  ‘Yes master! On guard master!’ the excited magical balls yelled together, cruising swiftly over several unhappy trees.

  The wizard gazed upon the seemingly endless stretch of forest as they approached the distant valley with speed. The long stretch which had taken the boys several hours was only a matter of minutes for the soaring Malco board. Shortly the valley came into full view, looking ever so peaceful and inviting. Chimzen looked over the endless clumps of grass and scattered trees, in complete distrust of the tranquil deception which lay below. He was more than prepared for any potential confrontation that may possibly be awaiting them.

  * * * * * * * *

  ‘Are you ready, ladies?’ Azor screamed, glancing across to her wicked sisters with a serious, sinister stare.

  ‘Ready Azor!’ they chirped in chorus. They were all positioned in a perfect square as if preparing themselves for a dangerous acrobatic circus routine.

  ‘Go Gallica! Go Paulina!’ Azor yelled the command.

  Rose Gallica began chanting a rosy poisonous rhyme, in a sweet thorn pricking melody, and Violet Paulina followed suit, bringing the powerful poisonous spell to disastrously potent perfection.

  ‘Roses zare red, oui.’

  ‘And violuts are blue, mun.’

  ‘Let our zflower powers unite’

  ‘Destruchen in full view’

  ‘Roses zare red, oui.’

  ‘And violuts are blue, mun.’

  ‘Millions of zscorpion thorn ones.’

  ‘And Nigeriun cannabis killer too.’

  Paulina and Gallica stood spread apart while surges of magical energy erupted over their flowery head arrangements. Instantly the little roses on Gallica’s perfect headpiece exploded, flying in all directions like popcorn kernels on high heat. The little red roses, including a short piece of thorny stem, began multiplying by the thousand, hovering over Gallica like a swarm of angry bees. At precisely the same moment Paulina’s headpiece began reacting in exactly the same way, with thousands of violet flowers swarming into the air to meet with the thorny roses. The stem of each rose forced its way through the centre of a violet flower, making the stem appear as though it was wearing a little floral blue skirt. The violet skirt spun around the rose stem like a little propeller, enabling it to zip swiftly in all directions. As it propelled the rose forward, the violet flower released an unpleasant sweet-smelling green smoke known by most Nigerians as grass, weed, spliff or electric spinach. Within a matter of seconds each rose had prepared itself with a potent smelling violet skirt, buzzing impatiently above in the thousand, waiting for the command.

  ‘Roses that are red!

  And violets that are blue!

  Attack the flying wizard!

  Make him hopelessly stoned, or dead will do!’

  Azor shrieked the closing rhyme with slippery serpent authority, and directed the swarm of angry rose-violators to the other side of the valley. She had incredible insight on her surroundings, trusting dark magic to keep her in touch with unknown activities. She had intercepted Chimzen during his attempt at finding the boys, and without a doubt, knew exactly where he was at that point in time.

  * * * * * * * *

  Chimzen gazed forward in horror, noticing a purplish-green haze floating towards him in the distance, like a sudden freak thunderstorm with dark clouds and colourful rainbows all blended into one.

  ‘On guard trio! We are about to confront some serious turbulence!’ he cried, pointing his staff ahead, uncertain of what exactly he was up against.

  ‘Yes master! On guard master!’

  The Rose-violators were fast approaching, giving him very little time to think up a suitable spell to counteract the buzzing flower fiends.

  ‘Oncoming storm, vicious attack…,’ he began muttering under his breath, struggling to find suitable words. ‘Oh blast it! It’s not a storm, so that won’t work. There must be something I can use to destroy this deadly flower plague, whatever it may be.’

  The poor wizard fumbled at his fluttering beard, at a complete loss for words. He had absolutely no idea what to do or say next. It was as if his brain had suddenly turned to cotton.

  ‘They’re almost here master! They’re almost here!’ Zip shrieked, her squeaky voice nearly breaking wi
th panic, while she watched the buzzing rose-violators approach without fear.

  ‘Ah-ha! That’s it!’ Chimzen exclaimed, snapping onto a brilliant idea at the very last second.

  ‘My aura encompasses like a mighty shield!

  Protection of truth, great light force field!

  No harm may come from the slashing thorn!

  Pulsating white light of destruction born!’

  With the voice of authority he chanted the powerful spell of protection, waving his magical staff assertively towards the buzzing onslaught. A great white light emanated from his powerful being, surrounding the Malco board and himself with a dazzling shield of truth energy. The onslaught of vicious rose-violators was suddenly upon them, propelling up and over the wizard to avoid the brilliant light. The energy shield immediately responded to the swarming attack, producing thousands of tiny strands of electrical light energy. They launched towards the unsuspecting rose-violators like miniature heat-seeking missiles, shredding them into useless garden refuse. Thousands of singed rose petals, thorny stems and violet propellers fluttered down from the sky and disappeared into the flaming aura below, leaving behind nothing but small insignificant trails of smoke.

  What Chimzen never realized was that the spinning violet flowers were releasing volumes of sweet-scented marijuana smoke into the atmosphere directly above. Looking somewhat puzzled, he sniffed at the air, and noticed the dense green smoke surrounding him.

  ‘No it can’t be,’ he muttered, ‘I haven’t smelt anything like this for years.’

  He forced his sleeve up against his mouth in a hopeless attempt to save himself from being drugged, but it was unfortunately too late for that. He started feeling strange, as though time was standing still, like he had been taken off to another planet, far, far, from Floran. He blinked his eyes rapidly, looking down at his legs to make sure that he was standing firmly on the Malco board. His magical aura began to dissipate as if the energy had been drawn from his radiant being. A drug like this, even though completely natural, has the ability to completely drain a wizard of power and sharp awareness very much like it would any normal person. He stared down at his ivy green robe in a trance, for what seemed like hours, and only a moment , all at the same time.