My place in the life

by Quelli di ZEd

ditch eyes and the trembling hands. I had never made a dream so coinvolgente and scary and I slightly remained impresses of it, because it came me to mind that someone said that the dreams are forecasts of events or simple warnings.

  It was not my case, I thought, therefore I went me toward the kitchen to drink an abundant glass of fresh water and to return in bed later immediately.

  Three months passed, before receiving a letter from America.

  I always felt the same emotion but I noticed that anymore every day I didn't spend thinking that, perhaps, to the next day you/he/she would have been set for me there.

  Mark was always thoughtful, kind, but I warned as one note of separation in his/her words, as him same writing more to a sister that to his/her girl.

  Read that you/he/she was studying a lot because it had to get ready himself/herself/themselves to face the maturity but you/he/she had also succeeded in inserting well him in the «turn» of the new friends. You/he/she had started to play to baseball, even though it kept on cultivating the passion for the kick, and it assiduously frequented a swimming pool. I already imagined as his/her physicist had to have become: graven, linear, irresistible.

  It was this that frightened me. Mark was a stupendous boy and surely you/he/she had already been adocchiato from some girl. To the only thought I felt an anger and a jealousy appalling, I would have liked to shout to all the Americans to hold the eyes and above all the hands to their place. But as I was able me, from the other head of the world, to succeed in preventing a thing of the kind?

  I resigned me to the idea that Mark could have other histories and perhaps you/he/she was already happened. Of however could also happen to me.

  Definite, therefore, to answer that same day to the letter and I intended me to write all of this that I tried and I thought. I wanted that he knew that I kept on suffering for him, that I could not forget him/it, but that unfortunately our lives they had to follow their course. Unfortunately each of us is marked by the destiny and it is not possible to change what you/he/she has been definite for us.

  The photo had succeeded very well.

  Me, Laura and Stephen we smiled the more possible and we wanted Mark to understand our feelings looking at our faces. We had asked to Patrick to make a photo that withdrew together all and three, as Mark had always seen us and as, we hoped, he remembered us. We desired, however, that succeeded to understand as we were in that precise instant, how much it missed us, as it was physically away from us but always present in our hearts.

  Stephen, as soon as he/she saw the photo it said:

  «He will surely like and I believe that it will be moved when he/she will see her/it. We love him and he wants to us some.»

  Laura, to those words, been moved and as his usual began to whine as a child.

  «What sadness! Because him so distant dev'essere, everything only and without us?»

  «It is not alone, Laura, and then it will return. Of the new friends you/he/she is done that will want well surely him how much us. It is to want effortless him of it.»

  I wrote a long letter in which I told all of this that I had done and I did. I wrote that I looked for a summer occupation, together with Laura, for racimolare two money, but it was not easy. To every application they answered us that they didn't have need or that we were too much young people. I wrote to Mark that probably in America it was easier to find a job while from us it was practically impossible.

  We had always believed that it was a cinch, instead we now saw us beat in face all the doors that we tried to open.

  Stephen had been more fortunate than us; you/he/she had gotten a lavoretto in a cafe and then you/he/she had to also graduate himself/herself/themselves him, therefore the as problem was not set.

  Laura and I, were abandoning unfortunately the idea, and we would perhaps have spent the summer as every year.

  I very in a friendly way concluded the letter without smancerie and excessive regrets.

  Sooner or later Mark would have returned and if the destiny had been from our part you/he/she would have made us rincontrare and to love as once, perhaps more before and with more conviction, because, after all, ours had been a history among little boys.

  Reflecting then with the sense of I wondered me if you/he/she would have lasted with Mark if you/he/she had not been forced to depart.

  We had decidedly become two beautiful girls.

  Laura had the long hair and blonds, slightly I moved on the points. It was tall and slender, with a model physicist, but more prosperous.

  It had a sweet face that incuriosiva for the grimaces that it did in continuation. It was not at all a calm type that worried him about to show only because you/he/she could afford him/it.

  My hair was slightly shorter than his, chestnut dark color and smooth, so much that I didn't succeed in making me a hair style because they even were not together with the glue.

  I had the most marked features in comparison to Laura, that made to jump the depths green eyes. I was not tall but I had an enviable physicist. I was thin of constitution but busty in the correct points.

  I had slightly inherited from my mother the wide sides but overall I was not able certain to complain me.

  We had become two beautiful girls and above all Stephen if aware n'era. When we went out it didn't release an instant Laura because, besides him to be very jealous realized that the boys always looked us with insistence and some times they didn't hesitate to launch compliments and invitations.

  Fortunately Laura and I didn't give weight to certain things and, even though aware of our aspect, not" we threw her/it", as they said some envious girls instead.

  We started to attend the discos, the pubs, the more meetings to the fashion, thanks also to Stephen that there scorrazzava from all the parts. You/he/she would not have allowed to go alone around his/her girl for any reason to the world, so, for the most greater part of the times, we went out in three and, I sincerely felt me some an intruder. The fact was that Stephen a sister almost considered me and we had become after the departure of Mark very united. He had lost the best friend, me the first great love.

  We were very in harmony and we were together always. Perhaps they also did them him not to make to think too much me about the" boy of America" but some times I found me to envy them. They exchanged kisses, tenderness but reproaches, howl also. Everything belonged to their love and it was beautiful to see how much they were loved and how much they held the one to the other.

  Even though their history was practically been born when they were little boys, according to me you/he/she was destined to last forever.

  I had already collected quite a lot albums of photos, raffiguranti the nature, the animals, but above all my parents and the friends.

  I loved immortalizing the expressions and the states of mind of whoever I met; I often wandered me for house with the photographic car and it was inevitable for me to go off photo on photo. What had taught me Patrick you/he/she had become for me a demand, a source of life. I felt me to revive whenever every I developed my photos and I succeeded in again seeing what you/he/she had impressed me in the moment of the release. They were of the magic moments for me because I felt me long live and really happy.

  I always used me the consultation of Patrick, also because I was still after all a beginner, and it was really during a cold autumn day that took me with the strong hands and he/she kissed me.

  We were in the darkroom to bring defeasible mine last «job», an entirely rolls devoted to the phenomenons of the nature. I was always generally with Laura but that time she was due to stay home because of an ugly influence.

  I had just hung to dry the last image, raffigurante the rays of the sun that filtered through the clouds after a temporal violent, when Patrick did very nearby him.

  «You have an innate talent. You could become indeed good and to make of this passion a real job.»

  «I thank you Patrick, but it is everything your worth. As teacher you are go
od.»

  I felt me some nervous every time that Patrick was found next to me, perhaps because it had a wild and irresistible charm and it was almost impossible to succeed in looking at him/it in the eyes for more than three seconds.

  «Looks that marvelous sceneries, that particular subjects go to seek! All of your photos are very beautiful and seductive, as you.»

  It fixed me in the eyes and I was forced to lower the look.

  «Not to exaggerate! I don't believe to deserve similar compliments.»

  I had the trembling voice and I felt a lot me to uneasiness.

  It supported the hands on my shoulders. It threw me verse of itself and me I was not able to react.

  It gave me a very impassioned kiss, almost violent, while with the hands it crossed the lines of my back as it looked for something.

  I was rigid, incredulous and I didn't understand what was happening.

  Probably he warned this state of mine of mind and it detached him from me.

  «I apologize you, I would not have owed.»

  I stared at him/it in the eyes but I didn't succeed in telling him nothing.

  «I try a strange attraction for you. It will be your beauty, your way of doing, your photos.»

  I kept on staring at him/it. It perhaps realized something, because he/she embraced again me and he/she kissed me.

  Also I was picked up by the passion and I started to caress his neck, then the soft hair. I was going crazy because I