My place in the life
Page 15
You have been the only one that has succeeded in reacting. Laura and I didn't know and didn't succeed in understanding what was happening but you have maintained the cold blood and you have assisted her» he/she specified Stephen.
«Not to exaggerate! However I was very worried and I didn't know what you/he/she was happening. Has thing told you the physician?»
«He/she wants to hold here me for a couple of days, then it will submit me to some examinations to understand what has happened me. I am some worried.»
«Because it Feels happy? Has you/he/she told you something the doctor?» he/she asked Laura.
«Nothing of specific but I have to prepare me to anything. You/he/she could treat him of a simple headache, or of something more serious.»
Patrick drew near to the bed, it bent him on me and it gave me a tender kiss on the forehead.
«Not to worry you. We will be you to us near.»
«Thanks of heart.»
«Oh Feels happy! I don't succeed in thinking that you can have some ugly illness!» it said Laura with the eyes full of tears.
«Stop her/it Laura! Nobody has said that it Feels happy it is sick. It is only a hypothesis, we hope remote» Stephen hissed her/it.
They stayed in my company for about a hour, until when doctor Smith recommended them to go home, so I would have been able to rest some.
My friends were hardly gone out of the room they made their entry my parents. They seemed me sad, tired. I asked them thing they had and, considering that my mother didn't do anything else other than to whine, was my father to answer me.
«Some are alone worried and then know your mother: enough a foolishness and her bursts in tears immediately! However we have already taken all the appointments for the specialistic sights together with doctor Smith. It is a good person, I believe, and surely we are in good hands.»
«I also believe him/it me.»
They were still some with me, then I was me to send them home, begging them, however, not to abandon me in that hospital and to do visits later me the day.
I don't know how much time I remained to fix the ceiling with thousand thoughts that wandered me for the head.
For the first time I became me account than life is fragile.
The two past days in the hospital had emotionally destroyed me; I had not gotten used to be firm in a bed for the most greater part of the time without doing nothing and then I had assumed a waxen complexion, typical of the people that are dams in dark and unhealthy places.
You/they were already spent some days from when I had been low but I didn't feel like going out. Did I always have a fixed thought that flashed me in the mind, that it tormented me, that he/she left me perplexed: thing would have happened me?
Did I see the most important scenes of my brief existence again continually, as for fear to forget her and did I always set me the same question: thing I would have been able to do in the life if I/you had not had to meet me with an ugly illness?
I didn't become me account that, however, I didn't have anything, nobody had been diagnosed me with serious illness, but I already thought about the worse.
Fortunately I was always surrounded by my friends that practically they were almost established in my house. My parents were very happy of this, because they made him account than I was down and than ditches, worried above all.
An evening Laura, while we were speaking of the school that turned by now at the end, it told me:
«I have decided to follow the road chosen by Stephen; I will enroll me in the institute of physical education and I want to become a good teacher of gymnastics.»
«Compliment Laura! At least you you have the clear ideas. I don't even know if I will succeed in arriving at the end of the year.»
«Cries Feels happy her/it! I am fed up with to feel to speak to you as a poor martyr. You are not sick, you don't have anything, they are all your ideas and it is now that take back yourself and you restart to conduct a normal life. I cannot see you this way. A vegetable seems me!»
I stayed without words. I had never seen become rabid Laura so, even on the occasion of a quarrel with Stephen. It had the blocked eyes, it tightened the fists and I feared you/he/she could slap me from a moment to the other. After all it didn't have all the blames. I had to return to live, to make my choices, any pits my destiny.
I got up me standing and I embraced him.
«Thanks Laura. I don't know what I would do without you.»
«The friends serve for this.»
I felt better already me and I proposed to Laura to go to take a walk, despite pits already dark. It accepted with a lot of enthusiasm, I/you had not even promised her a meeting with his/her preferred actor.
After so many sleepless nights, that evening I almost immediately fell asleep me, without nightmares and ugly dreams to persecute me.
It was a splendid day, the sun was a lot of heat and after a fresh shower I had an abundant breakfast.
My parents were already gone out, therefore definite that would have chosen alone the university faculty that I would have frequented.
The discourses of Laura had made me come the desire to study, to do something of concrete in the life, to become someone.
I started to skim through a volume that listed all the faculties of this world but I didn't succeed in detaining me on none of them; I looked for something that attracted me particularly but it seemed I didn't have to find her/it. I thought about the suggestions of my parents but their ideas they didn't thrill me a lot of; for them I would have had to choose jurisprudence or letters but also medicine. I didn't see us nothing interesting, or better, anybody they didn't give me stimulus.
That day, however, my attention was really captured by the faculty of medicine; I started to read the presentation, the subjects and I felt me almost involved in first person. Did I warn the impulse to immediately enroll me but because?
I reflected an instant and the answer it came unwillingly some.
Simple: I was too worried for my health and at that time I would also have given anything to know how I was really.
Did I remain for quite a lot time to fix out of the window, did I think about the advantages and the against that faculty, did I wonder me then: I will make her/it?
It is not simple and I cannot afford to take the lightly thing.
More they flowed the minutes and more I was convinced.
I had decided, the faculty of medicine I would have enrolled to, so I would have made immensely happy also my parents.
I would have studied very hard and I would have given all myself in every thing that I would have done, whatever pits my destiny.
The odor of the hospitals had always given me bother but that day I didn't even take care of for an instant of it; my parents and I attended to be received by doctor Smith to know the results of the examinations that had been done me.
I was rather nervous and in fact I didn't succeed in being session on that chair for more than three minutes; I had gotten ready to the worse and, when the first evening I had told him/it my parents, my mother you/he/she had bursted in tears and you/he/she had embraced me strong, while my father, worried more perhaps about me, you/he/she had simply said that you/they would always have been me near and that also they was to prepare to feel you any diagnoses.
A woman fondly held in arm his/her child, you/he/she swung him/it and you/he/she gave tender kisses on his forehead; you/he/she was reassuring him/it in sight of a medical visit and his/her child you/he/she appeared very calm among the maternal braccias. You felt to the sure one and it didn't fear anything because it was with his/her mother.
At that time also I would have liked to be serene, calm, as among the braccias of a mother, but unfortunately, unlike that child, I perfectly understood thing happened around me and the embrace of a dear person would not have been enough for to frighten the give me.
Doctor Smith was writing on some sheets but, not as soon as the nurse made us arrange in his/her s
tudy and saw us enter, you/he/she immediately got up from his/her armchair and you/he/she came us meeting, reaching out for everybody and three.
«Well arrived. Hi it Feels happy, as are you?»
«There is not badly, thanks.»
We sat there on comfortable black armchairs, similar to that of Ivan but slightly smaller. The study was very comforting, it gave a sense of heat and calm; you/he/she was furnished with a lot of taste, in ancient style, and to my opinion it perfectly mirrored the personality of the physician.
On a wall it was suspended a press raffigurante" The sunflowers" of Van Gogh, while on that opposite it fixed us a self-portrait of the painter.
There was an instant of silence among us, then Ivan lifted the eyes from my clinical briefcase and aimed them at mine.
Its look was serious and penetrating and didn't promise anything of good person.
«I have here all the results of the examinations. Considering that by now I believe to have become your friend I hold necessary not to make so many turns of words and to directly go to the firm ground.»
It looked me with tenderness, then he turned toward my parents, then again toward me.
«I regret it Feels happy, but we have individualized a dark stain in your head, in the right part above the temple.»
The breath died me in throat.
My mother threw out of the bag the handkerchief and started to sob; my father shook me the hand to make to understand me that they were present also them and that you/they would always have been him/it, then that