Finding the Green Room (The Sutter Family Book 3)

by Heather D'Agostino

  “He’s working today,” my dad murmured as he came up behind me. “You don’t have to see him.”

  “I know, Daddy.” I sighed as I continued to stare. How could something that’s held so many happy moments hold the sad ones too?

  “Your mom and I were planning to meet some friends for dinner. I was wondering if you wanted to join us, or not?” He placed his hand on my shoulder.

  I glanced back and stared at my father, a man who was always a hero to me. In this moment, he looked so unsure of himself. It was like he could tell how unhappy I was, but didn’t know how to fix it. He wanted me home because he missed me, but he also knew how much it hurt for me to be here. “I think I’m just going to hang out on the beach if that’s ok?”

  “Sure.” He nodded. “If you change your mind, we’ll be at the Greenway Pub.”

  I smiled in acknowledgement before looking back to the water. I didn’t want to go anywhere where I might run into Ryan. Despite the time we’d been apart, the wounds were still fresh. It still hurt to remember the things he said, and knowing he’d moved on made the pain so much worse.

  ooooooooo

  As my parents’ car pulled out of the driveway, I grabbed my board and began walking toward the water. The sun was sitting lower now, almost kissing the horizon. I smiled as I watched the children who had been building a sandcastle for most of the day scatter when their mother shouted for them. I remember being those kids. I’d stay out on the beach or in the water until I was forced to come in and eat. I didn’t know back then how lucky I was.

  The beach was empty as I padded toward the shallow waves, the water a bit rougher than I remember. Cali’s coast was more reliable than the Carolinas. I grew up here, so I was used to the unpredictability, but when I moved west, it was eye-opening. It was easier to pick the good days, and the wipeouts were a little less. My skill level was elevated now, so the challenge that these waters offered excited me.

  I ran down, splashing through the surf as I waded out to the deeper water. When I got deep enough, I duck dived to get past the breakers. When I surfaced, I climbed up and just sat on my board. It was quiet, and the water was comforting. I hadn’t gone surfing for fun in months. Every outing was spent trying to land a new trick. I was right on the cusp of greatness, as my agent put it. I needed a little edge to take it all the way.

  I shook my head as Phillip’s words rang through it. I was out here for me today. It wasn’t about the next trick, it was about healing. Getting past the hurt that was still settled in my heart from Ryan. I knew that my head wasn’t truly in the game these last few years, and if I could get him to understand why I left, maybe he’d give me the closure I needed.

  I stayed out there bobbing in the deep, just staring at the sky as it darkened. I’d caught a few rides, but nothing significant. I wasn’t really trying though. It was more about clearing my head, and getting myself prepared for what would come tomorrow night. I knew I’d probably find myself out here again, but I was hoping that I wouldn’t need to.

  oooooooo

  Ryan

  I love my job. I don’t think I say it enough, but I do love it. I spend my days sitting in the sun, staring at chicks, and my nights getting sweaty with one of them. I’ve learned over the last few years how to stealthily get in and out of my parents’ house. I’ve also learned a few lines that the women tend to believe to get me into their place. I have roommates, it’s not clean, it’s too far away and I want to fuck them right then… they all work, and we both get what we want. If they’re a clingy one, I escape in the night, if not we have a little morning sex before I make an excuse to leave. I don’t date anymore, it’s not worth it. I spent years cultivating my relationship with Jess. Even though we were kids, I worked hard to be what she wanted. I gave up the advances that came from my classmates, turned down offers only to have her leave me.

  It stung for a while, but I got over it. Now, I don’t waste my time. Brinley’s been coming to my tower after work a few days a week, and there have been a few others. I don’t remember some of their names, I remember faces though. I call them by ‘pet names’, it’s easier and they don’t know that I’ve forgotten.

  Today has been a great day though. I’m meeting Brinley as soon as I get out of work, and we’re going to heat up the sheets at her place. We’ve never been out together anywhere, so I wanted to talk to her about my expectations for the rehearsal dinner tomorrow night. I want to lay down some ground rules. I like her, but I don’t want to date her, and I don’t want her to think that this is the beginning of any kind of relationship.

  “Hey Stud,” I hear from behind me. “Speak of the devil,” I grinned as I glanced back. “I’ve still got to pack up my stuff and close down my tower.” I scanned the water one last time before I hung the ‘off duty’ sign on my tower. The sky is a deep red and the wind has been picking up all day. All the signs of a storm, and I’m wondering if my mom is freaking out right now because she’s set everything up for tomorrow already.

  “You were thinking about me, huh?” Her nails scraped along my pec as she leaned into my side.

  “Nah.” I shrugged as a wicked grin spread across my lips.

  “That bulge in your trunks says otherwise.” She giggled as her chin tipped down. I could feel her eyes burning a trail down my body, and my dick took notice. Brinley was always a good lay, even when we were young. It was like her body just knew how to bend just right, and she knew it. “Wanna get something to eat first?” She pressed a kiss to my neck right along my jaw, and food was the last thing I was thinking about.

  “Not really hungry right now,” I mumbled as I tried to keep my composure.

  “Ok.” She shrugged as she stepped back, leaving my body heated up and primed for the taking.

  I grabbed my belongings off my tower with one hand, and Brinley’s hand in the other as I stalked up to where she usually parked. “What’s the rush?” She giggled. She fucking laughed at me, and that made me want to fuck her even more. “Little excited?”

  “Get in!” I pointed to the passenger seat of her car as I flung my things in the backseat. “I’m driving.”

  “Why?” She smiled as she licked her lips and tried to pull off the innocent look. This girl was never innocent. She’d tried before, but she knew I didn’t go for that type. The only innocent girl I’d ever wanted didn’t want me anymore. I’d been burned by the innocent, so now I went for the serpent. I fucked the girls who knew what they were getting at the beginning, no promises of anything. If we had a good time and they weren’t clingy, they might get a call back for a repeat performance. If they sucked or decided that they wanted more, I sent them packing.

  “You’ve got better things to do with those hands.” I smirked as I climbed in behind the wheel.

  “Oooohhhh, I see.” She licked her lips and batted her eyes. Smart girl. As I cranked the car and backed out of her space, she went to work untying my trunks. “No one’s at my place,” she mumbled. “You can go there. I’m alone tonight.” She sighed as she pulled my dick out of my trunks.

  “You trying to flash my junk to the whole world?” I snickered as she ran her fingers up my length. Fuck, she was going to be the end of me.

  “You seemed pretty insistent that I take care of this.” She leaned down and swiped her tongue over the tip before blowing on it.

  “Fuuuuuck!” I hissed. “You’re going to kill us, babe.”

  “Watch the road,” she barked before leaning down farther and taking me all the way into her mouth. Now, Brinley has always been good at giving head. She was the first to blow me, but shit, it never gets old.

  My knuckles turned white I was gripping the wheel so tight as she bobbed and swirled in my lap. My eyes closed once or twice, but I kept reminding myself that I was driving. I almost pulled over at one point, but I needed to fuck her and in order to do that, we needed to get to her place and fast.

  “Slow down. Shit. Brin. I’m gonna fucking come if you don’t slow down.” I rocked my hips a
s she reached into my trunks and cupped my balls. That was it. A few light squeezes and a rake of the teeth across my dick, and I fucking lost it. My head slammed back on the seat as I blew my load right down her throat.

  She smiled as she licked me clean before slipping my trunks back in place. She leaned back into her seat as I pulled into the parking lot of her apartment. “Better?” She grinned in satisfaction while wiping her thumb across her lower lip.

  “Not even close.” I cut the engine. “That was just a warm up.” I shoved the door open and climbed out. “Inside, now!” I pointed at the door and tried to keep the wicked grin off my face. “You’ve got ten seconds to get naked.”

  “Aren’t we pushy today,” she teased. “You’d think you hadn’t gotten laid recently.” She laughed as I stalked toward her.

  “I’m warning you, Brin. If you like that top, you better get it off in ten seconds before I rip it off.” I shoved through the door as soon as she opened it. “Ten, nine.” I followed right behind her as she rushed toward her room.

  When she stepped through the door, she yanked at her clothes like they were on fire. A shirt went one way, bra the other, the tiny little shorts she was wearing ended up behind us. By the time she got down to her panties, I’d reached one in my countdown. I gripped her hip and gave them a yank as I pushed her onto the bed.

  “I liked those.” She fake pouted as my mouth descended onto hers.

  “I’ll get you more,” I mumbled against her lips as I fumbled with my trucks. As they hit the floor, I rolled on a condom, took a few breaths to get control of myself before sinking into her.

  We both groaned in pleasure as her legs lifted to wrap around my hips and I slipped deeper into her. “I needed this,” I muttered as I began to move.

  “Then take it,” she moaned. “Fuck me, Ryan. Fuck me hard!” Her nails scored down my back, stopping right at my ass as she pulled me in closer. We’d always been wild when it came to sex, but tonight she seemed different. It was almost like she was trying to prove something to me, and in that moment, I wondered if she knew. Did she know who was going to be at the party tomorrow? Was she trying to secure her spot in my life? Was she threatened? She shouldn’t be. No one should. Only one person ever found their way inside my heart, and that person threw away the key. That part of me is locked up so tight that I don’t think it’ll ever open again, and at the moment I don’t care if it ever does. Right now, Brinley is what I want. Brinley is what I need, and Brinley is the one who’s been here giving it to me.

  “Fuuuccccck!” I roared as I began pounding harder and harder into her. The bed shook as sweat dripped off our bodies. As soon as I felt her tightening on me, I let go and came harder than I have in a long time. My body shook with pleasure as we both attempted to control our breathing.

  “Feel better?” She smiled up at me as she pushed me off her and began waltzing toward the bathroom. “I’m gonna shower, and then we can order a pizza or something.” She flipped her hand in the air before stepping into the bathroom and closing the door behind her. I smiled as I heard the shower roar to life and remembered this was why I liked her. She knew what I needed, and at the moment it wasn’t a girlfriend. It was a good fuck and someone to talk to, and that’s what she was.

  Chapter 8

  Jessica

  I’ve spent most of the day telling myself that tonight will be fine. I don’t have to talk to him. I can pretend he’s not even there, but I know that’s not true. When we were teenagers I couldn’t even be in the same room as Ryan Sutter, and not be completely aware of where he was and what he was doing. I just wasn’t wired that way. I knew the minute I got to the rehearsal dinner tonight, my body would go into overdrive. I could pretend I didn’t care, but I was a terrible liar.

  “We’re leaving in five minutes,” my dad called down the hallway. I’d been locked in my room for the last hour as I stared at my reflection. I’d changed clothes three times. I don’t really know why. I didn’t need to impress him, but a small part of me wondered how he would react when he saw me. It’s been three years; does he even know what I look like now?

  “Be out in a minute,” I called back as I smoothed the bottom of my peach colored sundress down. My skin was a deep bronze from so much time on the beach, and the sun had bleached my hair even more than usual. When I was younger, the kids at school called me Malibu Barbie. It wasn’t meant to be a compliment, and Ryan spent many afternoons in detention when we were younger for defending me. When I moved to California and met Griffin, he started calling me Barbie. We were friends, so I let it slide. Now, standing here I can see what they saw. I’m built like Barbie, tall and thin. The body they all knew has changed and molded into that of a woman. Aside from a small scar on my hip from a bad wipeout last year, my skin is still flawless. My hair has grown out to where the tips touch my lower back and if I turn my head just right it brushes the top of my butt. I haven’t worn heels much, only to events Phillip has dragged me to. Tonight though I think I want to.

  “Jess!” It was Mom calling now. I could tell she was getting impatient with me. I was never late anywhere and I was pushing the limits today.

  “Coming Mom!” I yelled as I took one last look in the mirror. “You can do this,” I whispered to my reflection as I turned toward the door.

  ooooooooo

  The drive to the Sutters was quick. They only live four houses down the street. We could have walked, but I’m glad we didn’t. Heels weren’t really conducive to walking on the beach. I didn’t really understand why we were even going tonight. No one was in the wedding party and we weren’t out of town guests, but Nick and Leah had insisted. They said we were like family, and Emma would want us there.

  The storm that had been brewing the night before had thankfully blown over so the preparations they’d made the day before weren’t thwarted. When the house came into view I took a few deep breaths. I’d watched it from the water yesterday, but it was different actually being this close. I’d spent most of the childhood here. I knew every room, and had eaten many meals with this family. At one point, I thought I’d be part of it one day. Ryan and I had been joined at the hip, and when we finally started dating it seemed like my dreams had come true. I had countless notebooks with ‘Mrs. Sutter’ written on them. When my dream of surfing came true, all of this other stuff crashed around me like a breaking wave only instead of pulling away the wreckage, it pulled me away instead.

  There were signs along the driveway directing guests to the backyard where I knew there was a deck surrounding their pool. I looked away as we passed the storage shed. I’d made out countless times with him in there. We climbed the steps to the back deck to be met by Leah, Ryan and Emma’s mom.

  “So glad you guys could make it.” She grinned as she shook Dad’s hand. “We just finished up on the beach. Food will be served soon. Drinks over there, and help yourselves to some appetizers.”

  “Thanks.” Mom smiled as she and Dad began to say hello to the other guests.

  I stood there awkwardly, as I carefully looked around. I didn’t want to see him, but I knew it was inevitable. I wanted to make sure I saw him before he saw me so I could be prepared. “We’re so glad you came home for this, Jess. You’ve always been like a daughter to us.”

  I gritted my teeth as I let the version of me that goes to PR events come to life, “It’s good to be back. I’m so happy for Emma.”

  Leah leaned in and hugged me as she whispered in my ear, “You don’t have to pretend with me. I know this is hard for you. It’ll get better. I promise.” She pulled back and gave me a reassuring smile, “I’ve been you. If you ever want to talk or use the pool,” she shrugged, “I’m here.”

  “Thanks.” I nodded as I sucked in an unsteady breath. “I think I’m gonna get some water.”

  “Go get a glass of wine. Avery will help ya. I think you might need it tonight.” She patted my shoulder before walking away to greet more guests.

  I wasn’t big on drinking. My agent didn’t let me
at events since I wasn’t twenty-one yet. Sometimes my parents let me, and tonight I think will be one of those.

  ooooooooo

  Ryan

  The rehearsal took forever. It was a warm day, and standing on the beach in khakis was rough to say the least. Brinley came early, and sat through the rehearsal too, so that helped, but after staring at her legs in the short little dress she was wearing all I wanted to do was escape. Knowing that Jess was going to be here tonight didn’t even phase me anymore. I was too engrossed in finding out if Brin had panties on or not.

  When the rehearsal ended, more guests arrived and soon our entire deck was covered in people. The pool wasn’t going to get used tonight, so Dad had put some fancy covers on the lights. It made the water glow a light shade of purple. Em had wanted everything to match her wedding colors which were purple and silver, so purple water it was. There were small candles floating on the surface, and all the tables were adorned with purple and silver linens. She’d even requested that all of us guys wear purple shirts tonight. I was already wearing one tomorrow under duress, I might add, so tonight I decided to be the brother that I am and wear blue.

  Brinley had worn a blue dress that matched me, so you could tell we came together. It was all part of the plan to make Jess jealous. She hated Brin with a passion when we were younger, and if she thought that Brin had replaced her, she might feel a small amount of the hurt that she’d inflicted on me. Was I being petty? You bet your ass I was, but I never claimed to be an adult here.

  When the rehearsal ended, Brinley and I slipped into the storage shed for a little makeout session. I wanted to remind her of her role tonight, and I needed something to calm the nerves. I knew she was here. I could feel it, and Brinley was the distraction I needed to keep my head in the game.