Love Me, Lauren

by Elle Linder

  Julia’s face fell slack. All her zeal turned to vapor. “And?”

  “And?” he repeated, confused by her question.

  “Yes, and. And you’re going to Alaska, aren’t you?”

  He rubbed his beard. “What else am I supposed to do? She’s the kids’ mother.”

  “I know that!” She forced his hands off her, leaping off his lap. “I know! You don’t have to tell me that every damn time Renee calls you back to Alaska!”

  “I’ve spoken to Rick about going with me.”

  “Rick? For what?”

  “To search for her.”

  “Search for her? Can’t the police or sheriff do that? The wedding is in four weeks. Four. Weeks.” She spun around, her hands over her face. Luke walked up behind her, wrapping his arms around her. He buried his face in her hair. “I don’t want you to go,” she whispered into her hands.

  “Julia, what if she tries to kill herself? I have to find her for the kids’ sake.”

  She turned to face him, her eyes wild with fear as she pulled out of his arms. “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!” she cried out, opening a draw in her desk and then an envelope. She looked up at him, tears pooling in her eyes. “This came several weeks ago. Maybe a month ago.” She handed him the letter, then sat in her chair.

  He read the letter slowly, taking in every word, trying to read between the lines. It sounded like a suicide letter. Julia kept her head down, stricken with remorse. “Why didn’t you tell me about this?”

  “Because I forgot.” A tear streaked her face, falling on the desk. “Mom arrived with her sisters the day it came. Then there was wedding stuff. You took the kids to Alaska. All the plans for buying the property and building the house. Fast forward a week from there, Lauren was here, you returned from helping Rick move, and then Lauren left brokenhearted.” Luke stared at her, stunned. “Stop looking at me like that. I forgot! It happens. The craziness with the wedding, the kids starting school, running the resort. Dammit, I forgot!”

  “But, baby, this sounds like a suicide letter.” His voice softened. He didn’t want her to think he was angry with her, but he was disappointed.

  “Luke, how do you know that? This could be one of her manipulative games. Just Renee trying to ruin our happiness…my happiness.”

  He didn’t know what to say. He scanned the letter again.

  Julia rose for her chair, tears now streaming down her cheeks as she neared him. “You believe me, don’t you?”

  He looked up at her, his mind going a million miles a minute. “Of course I do. I know you’ve had a lot on your plate with the kids in school and planning the wedding.” Her lip quivered. “But this”—he lifted the letter—“it might have been a cry for help.”

  “You can’t be serious. The awful things she said about me were a cry for help? Her hateful words, putting the blame on me, was a cry for fucking help?” she yelled.

  “She obviously needs more than drug rehab. She’s a danger to herself.”

  “I can’t believe what I’m hearing. You’re angry with me because I forgot about the letter.” She shook her head. “Unbelievable. Well, be angry all you want. Go to Alaska, lead a search party for your ex-wife, and I’ll…”

  “You’ll what?” His heart galloped, waiting for her to finish her thought.

  Julia grabbed her handbag and went to the door. As she put her hand on the doorknob, Luke gripped her wrist. “And you’ll what?”

  She jerked her hand away, then opened the door. Erika stood staring, wide eyed. Neither of them cared that they had an audience.

  “You’ll what?” Luke’s voice echoed in the lobby as Julia walked toward the exit.

  “Call off the wedding!”

  “Son of a bitch!” He stormed after her. “You are not doing this! Do you hear me?” he yelled as she quickly jumped into her car.

  She slammed the door shut, locking it before he got to her.

  “Open the door.” He tapped on the window.

  She shook her head as tears rained down her cheeks. The car roared to life. Julia secured her hands on the steering wheel, her head falling forward. He watched her body shake, overcome by grief.

  “Baby… Open. The. Door.” He gasped, feeling his heart ready to burst.

  She shook her head and put the car in reverse, but he wouldn’t let go of the door handle.

  “Open the goddamn door!” He sucked in a breath, trying to calm himself. “Stay with me, Julia. Let’s talk about this…” She inched forward until he finally let go.

  His hands went to his head as he let out a loud growl.

  A storm rolled into The Peak as Julia’s heels clicked on the wooden floors. Bruce looked up from his post. He had been talking with Tiffani about Luke and Julia’s wedding, but by the look on Julia’s face, he was willing to bet his right hand that there was trouble in paradise.

  He reached for a wine glass, filling it half full and waiting for her to pick a stool. “Hey, sweetheart, what brings you in?” He smiled, placing the glass in front of her.

  “This is a bar, isn’t it? The booze brought me in,” she scoffed, putting the glass to her lips.

  He watched her drink down three large gulps. “Where’s—”

  “Stop! Don’t even ask.” She raised her hand at him. “And don’t ask me about food. I’m here for the wine. Just wine.”

  Bruce nodded, glancing at Tiffani. She stared at Julia sans her typical smirk. Instead, she appeared concerned.

  “I don’t get it,” Julia announced to no one in particular. “Every damn time I’m happy, thinking life is beautiful, that woman ruins it. Every time! What have I done to deserve this? What?”

  “I’ve asked myself that a million times since I was a little girl,” Tiffani murmured from the end of the bar.

  Julia looked at her perplexed, then to Bruce, then back to Tiffani. “You have? Have you ever figured it out?”

  “No, sorry.” Tiffani guzzled her beer. A glossy sheen covered her eyes. It made Bruce suck in a breath. He stepped back, giving the women a bit of space but keeping them within earshot. “So, what did Luke do?” Tiffani turned toward Julia.

  “It’s always Alaska.” She sipped her wine.

  Bruce shook his head, slicing lemons. If it was Alaska, that meant Renee. No doubt Luke’s honor to his kids would force him to react, but even if the kids weren’t in the middle, he had a feeling Luke would help his ex regardless. That was the kind of man he had known Luke to be, always willing to help the downtrodden.

  “So, what does Alaska mean?” Tiffani bravely asked.

  “That I’m calling off the wedding.”

  Bruce shot a glance at Julia. Instantly, he pulled out his phone as Tiffani blinked, gaping. He’d just stepped away from the bar to call Luke when Julia eyed him.

  “Nope. Put that phone back in your pocket, big guy. If you call Luke and tell him I’m here, you and I are going to be on the outs.”

  This was a moral dilemma for Bruce. Luke was his closest friend, but Julia was also his friend, a woman he respected and felt protective of. He slipped the phone back into his pocket and resumed his task of slicing lemons. It was better to wait, maybe learn more about what had happened before picking a side. He shook his head; he’d probably side with Julia anyway. She was like the little sister he’d never had but had always wanted. And Luke, well, he was a grown man. He could take care of himself.

  “Thank you.” Julia lifted her glass to him in a cheers to you motion.

  “Do you really want to call off the wedding? I mean, it’s Luke,” Tiffani prodded. “Any woman that lets him go is a fool.”

  “Seriously? You have no idea what comes along with him. His ex-wife is maddening, dreadful…a total bitch.”

  “She sounds like me.” Tiffani shrugged.

  Julia stared at her. “Yeah, I guess she does.” She snorted. “Except, you weren’t married to Luke.”

  “No, I wasn’t. And I wouldn’t want to be.” Tiffani’s bright blue eyes darted to Bruce, almost lik
e she was checking to see if he was listening. Indeed, he was, and he had been listening to her a lot the last couple of weeks. His feelings for her were growing, changing, and he wasn’t sure what to make of it.

  Julia nursed her drink in silence for a while. Seeing her so sad angered Bruce. But what was he to say to Luke on the issue? Talking sense into Luke after his mind was made up was nearly impossible. Nobody, not even Julia it seemed, could change his mind. Poor Julia.

  Bruce’s phone vibrated, and his gut told him it would be Luke, so he let it ring without answering. Moments later, the bar phone rang, which he had to answer.

  “The Peak, Bruce speaking.”

  “Hey, is Julia there?” Luke asked. He sounded worried. Bruce looked sidelong at her and Tiffani chatting. “Bruce?”

  “Why?”

  “Why? What the hell kind of question is that? Because I’m looking for her!”

  “She didn’t tell you where she’d be?”

  “Oh, I get it, she’s there. Have your loyalties shifted, friend?”

  “Maybe.” Bruce listened to Luke breathe, his eyes on Julia. If his stupid-ass buddy ruined the best thing he’d ever had, Bruce would always come to Julia’s defense.

  “Good. It’s better that you’re on her side.”

  “Is it? Why’s that?”

  “Because I’m the asshole who keeps hurting her. I hate myself for it.”

  “Stop being an asshole before you lose her.”

  “She threatened to call off the wedding.”

  “I know. Because of Alaska,” he said, lowering his voice. “What’s Renee done now?”

  “She’s missing.”

  “Missing, as in disappeared?”

  “Yes. I’m going to Alaska to search for her. Rick’s coming with me. I have to go, for the kids’ sake.”

  “Jesus, I wouldn’t want to be in your boots.”

  “How many glasses of wine has she had?”

  “One. She’s been talking to Tiffani.”

  “Oh, shit! It’s worse than I thought.”

  Bruce chuckled. “Don’t be a dick. Tiff’s not so bad.”

  He looked over at the blonde bombshell he’d admired from afar for ten years. She really wasn’t so bad, despite her slutty reputation. Down deep, he was certain she had a heart of gold, and if given the chance, he’d polish the tarnish right off it with his tender love.

  “Come again? Tiff?” Luke’s voice pierced his ears.

  “What do you want me to do about your lady?” Bruce dodged. That damn Luke. Nothing got past him. The last thing Bruce wanted was Luke poking around in his…his what? Affairs? Love life? Did he want a love life with Tiffani? He’d asked himself that question several times over the last couple of weeks. And each time his answer was maybe.

  “Don’t let her leave tipsy. I won’t come barreling in there like Tarzan, claiming my woman. That would just piss her off even more.”

  “I’d never let her drive home intoxicated, Tarzan.” Bruce smirked.

  “Fuck, I hope she comes home.”

  “She will, but you better be prepared. She’s sure a spitfire when she wants to be…or more like needs to be.”

  “Yeah she is. She’s a fighter. Call me if…well, you know.”

  “I will. I’d never let anything happen to her.”

  “I know. Thanks.”

  Bruce hung the phone up, then resumed his mundane task of slicing lemons. No sense in interrupting the women as they talked amicably. He held Tiffani in his sights, feeling all sorts of emotions as she smiled with Julia.

  He might like to call her his lady if the changes he’d seen in her during the last month were permanent.

  Shortly after eight o’clock, Julia pulled up to the house. The warm lights inside comforted her. The kids would be settled in the loft by now, Luke in the bedroom, sitting by the fire with a glass of bourbon in his hand.

  From the outside looking in, they had the perfect life. A home filled with an infinite amount of love. Love for him, love for her, love for the children…and their future children. She rested her hand on her stomach; it ached.

  Her period was due to start tomorrow, which explained her emotional and unreasonable reaction earlier with Luke.

  Well played, PMS.

  She exited the car, inhaling the pine and smoke in the air while she walked to the door. She would miss the little lake house once they moved into the new house. It was hard to believe it would be ready in eight weeks, and in time for their first Thanksgiving as a family. Might she be pregnant by then? She shook her head at the fleeting thought. Not with Renee and all her drama.

  It all stressed Julia out too much.

  At her annual physical two weeks ago, Julia had talked to her doctor about the stress she’d been having with Renee, the kids, the wedding, and the resort. They were all things she felt she had been handling well but worried they might interfere with getting pregnant. Dr. Wilson had suggested getting through the wedding and moving into the new house before worrying about having a baby.

  Logically it made sense, but the planner in Julia needed to have control of when she conceived—for planning purposes, naturally. She had a list detailing everything she would want to accomplish before the birth of their first baby. She was eager to begin, but there was a whisper in her ear that kept her from moving forward: “Renee will ruin everything.”

  Julia reached for the knob as the door opened. She stared up into the dark, loving eyes of the man she adored. He took her hand, helping her through the door. He took her handbag off her shoulder, placing it on the coat rack, then squatted and removed her pumps, putting them on the shoe rack. Julia slipped off her coat, and Luke took it, hanging it in the coat closet.

  They stared at each other, neither speaking a word as he touched her cheek. He leaned toward her, pressing his lips to hers. They entwined their fingers, both squeezing tightly. He led her to the bedroom, where he continued to remove her clothes. Still not a word was spoken.

  Once Julia was undressed, Luke covered her with one of his T-shirts. He guided her to the chair by the fireplace and sat down, and she took her place on his lap.

  She tucked her legs up into his side, snuggling against him as his arms reached around her body, holding her close. With her head resting in the crook of his neck, she let out a relaxed sigh.

  She was home in his arms.

  “I’m sorry for wigging out.” Her embrace tightened.

  “So am I. I hate hurting you.” He kissed the side of her head. “Is the wedding called off?” She shrugged. “I won’t be gone long. The wedding will commence on October nineteenth. I won’t let her ruin that day for us.”

  “And how do you plan to stop her? Thus far, you haven’t succeeded.”

  “Ouch.”

  “It’s the truth and you know it.”

  “I do.”

  “Then how?”

  “I don’t know. But I am going to marry you.”

  “What if I’m unsure?”

  “Are you?” She shrugged again. “You’ve changed your mind?” She shook her head, wrapping her arms around his neck. “You want to postpone the wedding?” His body tensed as the question left his lips.

  “No, I don’t, but—”

  “No buts, baby.” He lifted her chin, lips hovering over hers, and the scent of bourbon tickled her nose. “The wedding will happen on time. Rick and I won’t be gone long.”

  “You don’t know that. Have you even talked to him?”

  “Yes, I have. He’s in L.A. with Lauren right now.” Her eyes bulged in surprise at that news—it hadn’t even been that long since she’d talked to Lauren. “While we’re gone, you girls can talk baby stuff and business stuff. Sounds like she might be moving up to the woods.”

  “Wow… I don’t mind talking business stuff, but baby stuff…” Her gaze fell to her lap.

  “Did you start?”

  “After my reaction earlier today, it’s coming.” She sighed, keeping her eyes downcast.

  He drew
her in closer. “It’ll happen, baby. And when it does, the timing will be perfect.” She nodded against his shoulder.

  “When will you leave?”

  “As soon as Rick returns. I promise this trip will not interfere with our wedding. Nothing and no one will keep me from marrying the woman who has completed me, body and soul.”

  She looked up into his eyes. The adoration and determination in them calmed her anxious heart. Luke had never hidden his feelings for her, and she trusted him with her life. If anything were to happen to him, she couldn’t imagine her life without his fierce love and warm, flannel embrace.

  “Okay,” she whispered.

  thirty-two

  Mission Impossible

  Rick held Lauren tightly while she cried, their time together coming to an end. Pregnancy hormones had run amuck the last eighteen hours, and he loved ever happy tear she had shed. He hated leaving her, but he had to get back to Idaho so he and Luke could fly out to Alaska that evening. It all sucked. Like Luke, he didn’t want anything bad to happen to Renee. If she were really missing, he wanted to find her too.

  “Will you be all right?” He stroked Lauren’s back as she clung to him with a death grip.

  “Mm-hmm. I think so.” She sniffled. “Julia and Luke’s wedding is fast approaching. Will you be my plus one?”

  He chuckled. “I’d be thrilled. When I come out next weekend, you can help me buy a wedding gift for the happy couple.”

  Her head lifted and her lip trembled. “You’re coming out next weekend?”

  “Yeah, babe. You think I’d go three weeks before seeing you again?”

  “But I thought… Well, what about the brewery?”

  “Sweetheart, nothing means more to me than you.” He pressed his hand to her stomach. “And this little one. You both, along with Izzy, are my life.” Tears rolled three at a time down her face as a full grin stretched across her face.

  “Dammit to hell, I don’t want you to leave me! Is this how you felt in my suite that day?”

  “No, not even close. You at least know you’ll be seeing me again. When I walked out of the room, my heart wilted onto the ground. You probably stomped on it afterwards.” She socked him in the gut playfully. “Admit it, you did!” He chortled.