Sophie's Heart

by Lori Wick

  "It's going to be all right. Enjoy this time with your grandparents. You probably won't see them again until Thanksgiving, and when they leave we'll get back to our old schedule."

  The girls gently disengaged themselves, and Alec told them he would walk them upstairs. They waited while he double- checked the doors, turned off all the downstairs lights, and then climbed the stairs together. He walked them to their beds, kissed them, told them he would pray for them, and then went to his own room. He didn't go to bed, but took a chair in the dark and stared out the window that looked over their quiet street.

  I miss her so much, Lord, and I'm still trying to find my way. No one ever told me about the loneliness, the ache for personal contact. I'm trying to be the man in this, but I feel like a lost little boy. Please touch the girls. Comfort them to sleep this night, and help Sophie as well. I've got to be here more, but Ijust don't know how. It's easier to work.

  With that admission, Alec realized just how true it was. His eyes slid shut in pain. He loved his children, but on further thought he realized that he must love himself more, because he continued to work outrageously long hours. Sophie softened the

  73

  guilt he felt about leaving the children alone, but he was still gone far too often. Feeling very selfish and unworthy at that point and also very tired, he sought his bed.

  ***

  The next morning Sophie was at the end of the street when Alec came up in his truck. She woke early and decided to go for a quick walk. She was headed to Mrs. Nickelberry's that day, but knew it wasn't very far. She had done so little the day before that she felt in need of some brisk exercise. She never saw Alec until he swung the truck over and climbed out. Sophie waited patiently on the sidewalk for him to approach.

  "Hello, Sophie. You're out early."

  "It is nice time to walk."

  "Yes, I imagine it is. I usually run, but I go after dark when the kids are in bed."

  Sophie nodded, uncertain how to reply. Alec rescued her.

  "Are you doing all right?"

  "I am fine," she told him, and then forced herself to ask, "Do I need to move out of apartment, Mr. Riley, and look for other job?"

  "No, Sophie. My in-laws are leaving on Thursday and the kids are looking forward to you being back. Um, the girls told me about what happened. I'm sorry."

  "Is all right, Mr. Riley. I understand. She is upset."

  Alec nodded. That was very true. "Well, I need to get to work. I'll tell the kids you'll be back down on Thursday."

  "Yes."

  "Good-bye."

  "Good-bye, Mr. Riley."

  Sophie watched him swing away and then continued down the road. She thought about how wonderful it was that she still had a job and remembered to thank God for His goodness and provision. However, she frowned at her next thought, but then realized there was little she could do about it. She would have to be blind not to notice how very attractive the Riley children's father was.

  ***

  Sophie's palms were only slightly damp when she rang the bell at Mrs. Nickelberry's front door, but there was no need to be anxious. She was as easy to be with on Tuesday as she had been on Sunday.

  74

  "Sophie," she began, "I'm so glad you came. Where's your car?" Sophie had come inside, but Gladys had poked her head out the door to check the driveway.

  "I do not have car. I walked."

  "Oh, of course. It wasn't far, was it?"

  "No, much closer than church."

  "Did you walk to church, Sophie?"

  "Yes."

  "I could have given you a ride home. In fact, I could take you except that I usually go to the early service-the one that starts at 8:30."

  Sophie didn't know what to say to this, so she remained quiet. She would have enjoyed attending the early service, but she couldn't tell if Gladys really wanted to give her a ride or not.

  "I have lunch all ready, so please come in and sit down."

  "Thank you," Sophie spoke quietly as she followed her hostess. "You have a wonderful home, Mrs. Nickelberry."

  "Oh, Sophie, please call me Gladys, and thank you. Dell and I built this house in 1957. I can't imagine living anywhere else. We raised five kids here, and it's full of so many memories."

  "Does your family live close?"

  "Here and there. I talk to them all the time, if not in person then on the phone. I worked as a nurse when Dell and I were first married, and they still call here and describe their symptoms before they ring their doctor. I always tell them to call the doctor, but they still come to me first."

  Sophie laughed at the description. "It was that way with my grandmother. If I was at all upset or hurt, she was the first person I wanted to see."

  "Is she dead now?"

  "No. She should be. She has had cancer twice and almost died, but she is still living in Prague."

  "And you miss her."

  "More than I can speak," Sophie admitted softly.

  Gladys nodded and asked, "Are your parents still alive?"

  "No. My mother died when I was three, and then in 1968 when Russia invaded Czechoslovakia to stop the reformers, both my father and grandfather died."

  "Politics, right?"

  "Yes. The Czech leaders were making laws to give us more freedom, but other Communist countries feared their people would follow us and ask for reform, so they attacked. My family

  75

  stood up, and it cost them their lives. My father died immediately, but my grandfather suffered with his injuries for several months."

  "So what brought you to America, Sophie?"

  Sophie looked off into space with a dreamy expression on her face. "We heard so much. We heard there was such freedom and opportunity and that it was a land of untold hope. My grandmother and I, we plan and pray and then we decide to sign our names, but before we can do this, the doctors say her cancer is back for second time.

  "It does not look good this time, so with much tears my grandmother say, 'Go, Sophie, sign up. I will be gone before they call your name, and I can die knowing you will live our dream.' So I sign and then we are all involvement with cancer and I forget about America, until one day I come home from work and there is letter and Grandmother with big smile saying I am to go. I wanted to die with the pain."

  "But you came anyway?"

  "Yes. It was her wish, and I tell her I will not go unless she sign her name on the current list. She says she will be gone before it can happen, but still she signs and still I save my money for such a time and pray every day that she will join me."

  "Oh, Sophie," Gladys wanted to cry. "I'm so glad you told me. Now I can pray, too."

  "Thank you."

  "Shall we eat?" Gladys asked then, and Sophie nodded her head. They had been sitting at the table, but now they prayed together for the meal and began. A few phone calls interrupted them, but for the most part they had the afternoon to themselves. Gladys talked about herself and her husband, and Sophie wished she had known him.

  "He hasn't been gone that long, and I still pick up the phone to call his office before I remember he's not there."

  "He was not retired then?"

  "No, he wasn't working as many hours, but he still went in every day."

  "What did he do?"

  "He was an ophthalmologist-an eye doctor. A number of years ago he joined his practice with another man's and gave up surgery, so that took some of the burden off, but he still worked a few hours a day because he loved it so.

  76

  "One of our sons has followed in his footsteps and practices right here in Middleton at Dell's office, and one of our daughters is a nurse, so that's been rather special."

  "I can see that it would be."

  "Do you like your job with the Rileys?"

  "Oh yes. I love the children. I have had some days off this week because their grandparents are visiting, but I look forward to getting back."

  "Were you a housekeeper in Czechoslovakia?"

  "No."
<
br />   "Then what did you do?"

  "I worked at the Federal Assembly as a translator."

  Gladys blinked. "You mean a translator of foreign languages?"

  "That is right."

  "Oh, how interesting. What language did you translate?"

  "Italian, Russian, German, and Polish."

  Gladys could only stare at her. "You actually speak all those languages?"

  "Yes," Sophie answered, but she was becoming uncomfortable over her friend's reaction.

  Gladys then surprised her by asking a question in very clean German. Sophie's face lit up, and she began to rattle off in German without a trace of accent or hesitation. They conversed this way for several minutes, during which time Gladys learned more about this fascinating woman. It was clear that English was Sophie's stumbling block, since the switch to German was like someone had uncorked a bottle. All Gladys could do was sit very still and try to take it in.

  "In Chicago I was invisible. If you don't speak the language up to their standards, you're not worth their regard. At times it was so frustrating that I wanted to scream."

  "Did you?"

  "Only once, but it didn't do any good. Instead, I learned to pray and believe that the Lord knew I was important. I tried not to worry about the opinion of others.

  "When I quit my job to come up here, my boss said that I couldn't. He said I was the best bus girl he'd ever had. I asked him why he'd never told me this, and he said it was because I might ask for a raise. I left with him yelling behind me that he would give me a raise if I would stay."

  "Obviously, you didn't take him up on it."

  "No," she stated emphatically. "They all thought I was stupid. I wanted to tell him that he could give me the whole place and I

  77

  wouldn't work for him, but the Lord reminded me of my need to be thankful that I'd had a job at all."

  The women then ate for a time, but the conversation was far from over. They had coffee in Gladys' bright, spacious living room, and Sophie saw all the pictures of her friend's family- from the Nickelberrys' wedding photo to the picture of the latest grandchild.

  "How old are you, Gladys?" Sophie felt emboldened to ask.

  "Sixty-nine. Seventy in January."

  Sophie's mouth came open in an unfeminine way, and Gladys laughed in delight. She didn't look or act anywhere near that old. They had gone back to English by the time Sophie left, and at the front door the younger woman took Gladys' hand.

  "It has been so long, Gladys, since I have had intermission."

  "I think the word you want isinteraction."

  "Interaction! Yes, this is word," Sophie said triumphantly. "I have not had interaction with someone who cared for me for too long. Thank you for this day."

  "Oh, Sophie," Gladys told her sincerely, "the pleasure was all mine. We'll have to do it again sometime. Do you always have Tuesdays off?"

  "No, I am not sure what day I have."

  Gladys looked thoughtful. "Would you mind going to the early service, Sophie?"

  "Oh, I would really enjoy that. I am what you call early chicken."

  Gladys hooted with laughter before she explained the reason. She ended with, "I'll pick you up at about 8:15, and then after Sunday school you can come for lunch."

  Sophie accepted without hesitation, and in her excitement she almost forgot to say good-bye. She was nearly back to the Rileys' before she felt her feet on the pavement.

  78

  IT WAS JUST AFTER 6:30 ON Thursday MORNING when Sophie stood at her living room window and watched the Fraziers back out of the driveway. She pushed the curtain aside as the car moved away and saw Mr. Frazier looking up. Sophie was able to smile her thanks to him, and he answered with a slight nod of his head. Sophie knew it was ungracious, but she was glad to see them go. An hour or so later, when the kids left in the van, Sophie took her key and went down to get back to work.

  The first order of the day was her own laundry. She'd been washing things out in her bathroom sink, but knew that couldn't last forever; she hadn't felt clean for almost a week. It was after she had finished loading the machine that she spotted them: two very large boxes were stacked in the corner with an old sheet thrown over them. They hadn't been there before, so Sophie moved the sheet to investigate. As she suspected, they were addressed to Sophia Velikonja c/o Mr. Alec Riley.

  Sophie had known that Mrs. Frazier did not like her, but this was a little bit frightening. She knew that no one else could have done this. Again, she was glad the grandparents were gone and then prayed and tried to surrender her fear of this woman.

  You have brought me this far, Lord. Help me to keep on believing.It took a little more than one sentence, but after her prayer the day was off to a much better start. Mrs. Frazier had left the house in great shape, but Sophie found a huge pile of laundry in Mr. Riley's room. She washed and dried clothes, ironed, organized the linen closets, vacuumed under all the furniture in the living room, then started supper.

  The kids came in the door at the regular time, and even Craig seemed glad to see her. They talked about some things that went on at school and, after having a snack, disappeared to do their homework.

  Mr. Riley did not make an appearance near dinnertime, so Sophie set the table, adding a fourth place setting for herself.

  79

  She had come to realize that Mr. Riley was either on time or not in attendance at all. She ate with the children, and for the first time someone asked Sophie a little about herself.

  "Sophie," Tory wished to know, "did you like working at the restaurant more than here?"

  "No," Sophie shook her head. "I like it here."

  "What about in Czechoslovakia?" Unbelievably, this came from Craig. "Did you like your job there?"

  "Yes, I did."

  "What was it?" Rita pressed.

  Remembering Gladys' response, Sophie answered carefully. "I worked for the government."

  "My dad says their benefits are the best, but that's not always a good thing. People become dependent on them."

  Sophie had to agree. She, too, had heard about the benefits of American governmental jobs. "I can see how that could happen, but I think that it is different with the Federal Assembly."

  "The Federal Assembly? What's that?" Tory asked.

  "That is our governing body."

  She could see that they had more questions, but Alec chose that moment to come in the back door. Sophie swiftly stood to clear her place, but he waved her back down.

  "I'll just sit in the other chair, Sophie. I should have let you know I'd be a little late."

  Sophie still rose to lay a place for him, and then made sure all the food was within his reach. She did this silently and efficiently while the Rileys talked around her.

  "Craig, we're going to get to the lawn tractor this weekend. You'll have to remind me."

  "All right. Are we going to play basketball tonight?"

  "I don't know."

  "I have to go to Tina's to study," Rita put in.

  "Well, that answers your question," Alec told his son.

  "Couldn't Sophie stay with me?" Tory asked, and suddenly all eyes were on their housekeeper. Sophie couldn't know that Craig was holding his breath. Their Thursday night basketball games had been the highlight of their week until their mother died. Craig hadn't mentioned going to play in the games in ages, and now he was so filled with hope that he could barely take a breath.

  "We could watch a tape, Sophie," Tory said to her before Sophie really knew what was going on. She looked to Mr. Riley for answers.

  80

  "Men from the church get together on Thursday nights for basketball," Alec explained. "Craig and I like to play. Rita is usually here for Tory, but tonight she's tied up. If you would rather not stay, that will be fine. It's awfully late notice."

  "I can stay with Tory," Sophie told her employer and was pleased that she got the words right.

  "We'll watch a tape," Tory told her, her young face filled with exciteme
nt.

  "All right, it's all settled," Alec interjected. "But I want everyone to pitch in with cleanup."

  There were no arguments about this plan. Less than an hour later, with the kitchen spotless, Sophie found herself planted next to Tory on the sofa of the family room while a movie came to life on the large screen of the set. Tory manned the remote control, and Sophie thought she handled it like a pro. Tory must have noticed the way she watched her since she said, "Did you want to do it, Sophie?"

  "Oh, no, Tory. You do such a fine job."

  "Thank you. If Craig's here, he always holds it."

  Sophie smiled since this did not surprise her in the least. They had a snack about halfway through the film, and since it was 8:30 by the time it was over, Tory took herself straight to bed.

  Sophie was a little disappointed that Tory didn't ask to be tucked in or kissed good night, but the evening had been so pleasant that it was easy to let it go. Sophie cleaned up the popcorn bowls and cans of pop and then went back to the TV. She was having a great time with the remote when Rita came in the door.

  "How did it go?" Sophie asked her.

  Rita plopped down in a chair. "All right. We were at Tina's, and Tina's older brother was there." She didn't elaborate, so Sophie pressed her.

  "This is bad thing?"

  "It is if you're trying to get something done and Angie can't keep her eyes off him."

  "Is he interested in her?"

  "No." Rita's voice now became soft. "Tina says he's interested in me."

  "This does not please you? Maybe you cannot date boys yet?"

  "I can date. I've been able to for a whole year, but I just don't want to."

  "Can you tell me why?" Sophie asked gently.

  81

  "I would if I knew myself, but I don't," Rita admitted. "Since my mom died, Ijust haven't felt right about it. I'm not sure I ever want to marry."

  Sophie could easily see how she would feel this way. Was marriage worth the pain of separation they were all feeling now?

  "I think maybe you are rush yourself," Sophie finally said.

  "What do you mean?"

  "I mean that why must you date now? Maybe you are not date for many years, and I think that will be good. If your friends pressure you other way, then maybe you should find other friends."