Plenty Proud

by Jeanie P Johnson

  Her screams were a mixture of fear and pain. She barely had the strength to scream, and wondered if it was even worth it. Her brother and father were most likely both dead. She didn’t know how much damage was done to her foot, and it was so numb, she could barely feel the pain any longer. Her tears were freezing to her face, and she kept swiping them away with her mitted hand as her voice squeaked out in terror now barely audible. Her throat tightened, and she realized she was losing her voice. Mackenzie hugged herself with her arms to try and keep warm as she crumpled to the ground in anguish.

  I’ll just sleep for a while, she thought, feeling all her strength drain from her body. When I wake up, maybe my voice will be back, she assured herself, and then I’ll try again. She closed her eyes, feeling her tears were causing her lids to freeze shut, but she didn’t care any longer. Her desire to fight had finally deserted her. She didn’t even have the will to live any longer.

  “Holy Moses, what have we here?” She could barely hear the voice and thought she was dreaming. “Come on, missy, don’t ya fall asleep. Ya want ta freeze ta death? Wake up!”

  Mackenzie could feel someone slapping her face, but her cheeks were so numb, it didn’t even sting.

  “Hang in there missy. I gota get this trap off’en ya.”

  A moment later, her foot was free, and she could feel herself being lifted into someone’s arms. The person seemed to be dressed in fur, and it felt warm against her cheek, as the feeling started to return to her skin.

  A rush of warm air hit her as the man stumbled into the cabin with her, and then closed the door.

  “Your dress is about frozen solid,” the rough voice was saying. “Ya need ta get out o yer clothes.” He was starting to pull the wool dress from her body. It seemed to be frozen to her arms, and he worked the sleeves with his warm hands to loosen them. Her tears melted and she slowly opened her eyes.

  The cabin was warm and welcoming, yet much smaller than the cabin that had just been tumbled down the mountain, which she had considered home. She was sitting on a bed, and she watched as the man hung her dress on a hook in front of the fire, his back to her. He no longer wore the fur coat. He was dressed in the typical fringed, buckskin clothes of most trappers. When he turned, she saw his bearded face, his squinty eyes gazing at her. He was about the same age as her father, she assumed, by the looks of him.

  “How ya feeling?” he asked when he saw her looking at him.

  “All cold and tingly,” she barely muttered. It hurt to speak, and her voice squeaked out at him.

  “What happened to ya? Ya look terrible!”

  “Our cabin got caught in the avalanche and I was buried.” Saying that much made her feel out of breath, and her throat hurt even more as she forced the words out slowly.

  “You James Hutchinson’s daughter? I heard he was bringing his family out to be with him. His cabin is up higher on the mountain, right?”

  Mackenzie nodded. “It was me, my brother, and Pa. Only I couldn’t find them, once I dug out.”

  “I think I remember where yer cabin was. I’ll go up in the morning and check ta see ifen I can find anyone. Fer now, though, ya need ta get warm. Take those cold things off. I’ll peel yer boots off and see what damage was done by my trap.”

  He threw her a nightshirt, which she placed over her head and clumsily worked at removing her underclothes, as he looked at her foot.

  “It does look a bit mangled,” he mumbled under his breath. “Probably won’t be able to walk on it for a bit. Give me the rest of yer things and I’ll hang ‘em on the mantle.”

  Mackenzie managed to pull her damp underclothes off from under the large nightshirt, letting them fall to the floor. Then she pushed her arms through the sleeves of the nightshirt, as she watched him hanging the rest of her clothes on a hook.

  “What’s yer name?” he asked, as he turned back to look at her.

  “Mackenzie,” she murmured.

  “People call me Griz. They claim I look like a big Grizzly bear, cause I wear that fur coat most the time during the winter.” He pointed to the coat which he had removed and hung on a peg on the wall by the door, after he had placed her on the bed. “Go ahead and lay down. Ya look tuckered out. I’m just gonna work on warming ya up,” he stated. “How old are ya anyway?”

  “Sixteen,” Mackenzie mumbled as she lowered herself on the bed, and then felt Griz’s hands rubbing her cold feet. She had to admit it felt relaxing and was helping her frozen limbs to thaw out. Even though he seemed to be careful with her sore foot, now that the feeling was coming back, she flinched in pain.

  “Just relax, now,” he encouraged, as his hands started working themselves up each leg.

  Mackenzie stiffened a little, feeling she should not allow him to place his hands on her in such a manner, but she felt it would show lack of appreciation for his efforts to warm her chilled body, so she tried to relax, like he was insisting she do.

  Griz’s rough, weathered, hands continued manipulating her skin, and now that sensation was starting to return to her body, she was feeling more alarmed at the way the old man’s hands were exploring her body. She wasn’t sure it was proper, yet at the same time, she didn’t want to complain. His hands seemed to have no bounds as his fingers worked over her in a way she was sure he shouldn’t be touching her. Mackenzie gave a little whimper of concern, but he wouldn’t let her pull away.

  “Now ya just lay still, missy,” he breathed, seeming to forget her name. “What I’m doing is called fer, ta warm ya up proper. Nothin’ ta get upset about,” he soothed, only it wasn’t soothing her, except for the fact that she was getting warmer.

  It seemed she was feeling too warm as her heart started to speed in apprehension, when he boldly continued to examine her body further, under the guise of thawing her out.

  “It’s been a might too long since I touched a woman,” she could hear him mumble.

  She wanted to pull away, but realized he could force her to comply if she tried to fight him off, and there was no place to go. She was stuck here whether she liked it or not. She stiffly forced herself to endure his hands as he continued to take advantage of the situation, causing her to tremble in fright, now, as his fingers sought more territory.

  “Now, this won’t hurt ya none,” he assured her, when she weakly tried to push his hands away. “Don’t ya be figittin’. I’m only meaning to make ya get warmer, you’ll see.”

  Mackenzie closed her eyes tightly, as he proceeded to show her his intent. She tried hard to relax and allowed him to continue, thinking that maybe he had some insight on how to thaw out a half-frozen body. After a bit she stopped trying to fight against what he was doing. She was too tired and he was too determined. Besides, his hands were starting to warm her in a way she hadn’t expected. Even though it embarrassed her, she told herself she would just have to get over it, and let him finish what he was doing. Her body quaked, in response to his unabashed trespass upon her person, and she caught her breath, trying to hide her confusion and uncertainty concerning his insistence on handling her so.

  “There, now,” he whispered, “that’s startin’ ta make ya feel warmer, ain’t it? You’ll be better, in no time.”

  She had to agree with him, as his hands moved onward, working over other parts of her body, while she tried to gain her composure at his gaining familiarity with her. His palms found the softness of her taking his time to savor the texture of her body under his fingers as they played over her, then they wandered on to repeat his previous administrations, as though to rediscover her all over again, and this time, she knew what to expect, accepting his method of tending to her situation, and assuming it was innocent enough, even though it didn’t feel that way.

  Makenzie found herself falling asleep, after several rounds of working his hands over her entire body. She felt completely thawed out, and his hand had a way of making her relax completely. She was too tired to even think or resist. She only woke periodically, discovering that Griz was now in the bed beside her,
as his hands continued to trace over her body, never seeming to tire of his focused attention on her, making her feel he was truly concerned with her welfare.

  In the morning, she woke to his snoring, but couldn’t get out of the bed because she was up against the wall, and her foot hurt too much to try and climb over him. She saw he was dressed in his long-johns. Her throat was so sore she could barely swallow, and every muscle ached from her over exertion from the day before when she tried to dig herself out and then wade through the deep snow.

  Griz opened his eyes and leaned up on his elbow. “Ya don’t look so good,” he noticed.

  “I ache all over,” she barely mumbled.

  “Well, I ken take care of that fer ya,” he told her, pushing her onto her stomach and starting to kneed her muscles.

  She had to admit it did feel good, and was helping to relax her tight muscles, but as he continued, he turned her onto her back again, and this time, he looked down on what he was doing, as he pushed the nightshirt up so he could view her body.

  “Yer a mighty pretty, young thing,” he mumbled as his fingers traced over her, seeming to enjoy touching her the way he was.

  Mackenzie was feeling too weak to complain, and so when he introduced her to more of his method of ‘warming’ her, she made no resistance, and he took it as willingness on her part, as he violated her innocence further. At length, he seemed to have gotten his fill of the touch of her, and got up and got dressed.

  “Now ya just lay there and rest,” he told her. “I’ll fix ya some broth, and ifen ya need the bedpan, let me know. After ya eat, I’ll need ta go out and check my traps, and then I’ll go up and see if there are any signs of ye father or brother escapin’ the snow. It may take me some time before I can get back here, so ya just sit tight and get better. In a few days, you should be as good as new.”

  Mackenzie had a hard time swallowing the broth, but it did warm her inside, and she felt a little better after eating it. She took in a sigh of relief when the door closed and Griz walked away from the cabin. At last she could relax, knowing he would be gone most of the day and she could rest in peace. Only her mind couldn’t shut out the things he had been doing to her as he touched her body, and it troubled her because she was afraid he would eventually force her to submit to him in a more intimate way. However, there was nothing she could do until her foot healed and the snow melted. Then she would leave and head back to Missouri.

  Makenzie was woken by the slamming of the front door. She opened her eyes just enough to see Griz, entering the room, with a few lifeless animals slung over his shoulder. At first, her heart quickened, because it reminded her of her father, coming in after checking his traps. Only it wasn’t her father, and neither he nor her brother was there to protect her from Griz, despite his insistence that he only wanted to make her feel better.

  “Sorry, missy, I couldn’t find hide nor hair of yer menfolk. Ifen they got out, they certainly weren’t in the area any longer. We’ll have ta wait till the thaw and check fer their bodies. If we don’t find ‘em we can ask around ta see if anyone has seen ‘em.”

  Mackenzie’s face fell, and she closed her eyes again.

  “I gotta clean these critters and put the pelts on boards. Later on, when yer feeling better, ya ken help me. Yer Pa being a trapper, I’m sure ya know something about it.” He gave her a wink, and she shrugged.

  Mackenzie fell asleep again, and when she woke up, Griz had fixed some stew with one of the animals he had skinned, and handed her a bowl. She ate it thankfully, but it hurt to swallow, and when she was finished, she laid back down again.

  “Well, it’s been a long day,” Griz said as he started taking his clothes off, leaving his long-johns on. Didn’t get much sleep last night, but it were worth it ta nurse ya back ta health. I won’t mind givin’ yer back a rub tonight, as well,” he assured her, pulling the covers back, and rolling her over on her stomach.

  Griz pushed the nightshirt up, and laid his hands on her bare skin, working over her body, as he had done that morning, when she complained of aching all over.

  “We gotta get ya ta feeling better,” he told her as his hands started working over her bottom and then wandering to what he considered more fruitful territory.

  His desire to have his fingers there upon her, deepened, drawing his interest and prodding him on in his quest to enjoy his good fortune of Mackenzie stumbling onto his cabin in the woods. The experience was making him feel young again as his hands danced eagerly over her, craving even more discovery with each advanced touch. He tried to ignore Makenzie’s whimpers, believing them to be whimpers of pleasure as he prodded her into accepting each method he chose to bring what he considered healing sensations to the surface. He wanted so much more, only he felt there was a line he could not cross. However, everything else, to him, was fair game, as far as he was concerned. He was lucky to be able to touch her at all, he told himself working hard at holding his baser nature at bay.

  Turning her over so he could look upon her body, excited him more than he expected, and his mouth watered at the thought of knowing he had her there at his mercy, innocent and too weak to put up any resistance. He was priding himself on the self-indulgent belief that she didn’t want to put up any resistance. Therefore, he felt no guilt at what he was doing. This was a good education for her, and since she needed warming, he was just the person who could accomplish it for her.

  Griz proceeded in his uncontrollable need to use her as he pleased, once again finding that each new touch, made him crave even more touching. He wanted to continue to experience this moment of innocence lost to prove to himself he was experienced in the mysteries of a woman’s body. He was certain she also needed the experience as well. His wildest dreams had fallen into his lap, because of nature’s destruction. He was thanking nature at the moment as the smell and the feel of her took over his senses unrelentingly taking pleasure at the very texture of her skin beneath his fingers. Griz pretended she craved it as much as he did, wanting to create that need in her through finding what caused her to shiver involuntarily beneath his touch, and using it to his advantage.

  When he finally rested from his new-found delight, it was late into the night. Mackenzie had whimpered more than once during the course of the evening, whether out of fear or pleasure, he wasn’t sure, nor did he care. Just the sound of that whimper made him tighten and crave release. He would have to take care of that need himself, though, later. He knew better than risking putting the girl in a mothering way. This kind of life was not meant for youngens, and his life would always be the life of a trapper. He secretly hoped that neither her father nor brother would ever turn up. Maybe come spring, they would find them dead and he would have the girl at his mercy indefinitely.

  CHAPTER TWO

  Makenzie was quickly discovering that her presumed savior was turning out to be more of a master than a friend. In the beginning, when she could barely hobble across his small, disheveled cabin, she had no choice in the way he insisted on ‘nursing’ her back to health. He convinced her that what he was doing was for her own good and would make her stronger as he proceeded to handle her however he pleased. At first, he was gentle and caring, but if she complained, insisting she was feeling much better now, he became demanding. He told her if he stopped giving her the required treatment, her cough would come back, and it would help her foot to heal if he continued to make sure her body stayed limber through his administrations. She didn’t believe him, but she could not argue with him, because he told her if she didn’t obey, he would have to tie her down, for her own good. She didn’t want that, so she cooperated without complaint.

  Eventually, Griz wrapped Mackenzie’s foot and gave her a cane to help her limp around the cabin, telling her she could occupy her time while he was away, by tidying up the place. Soon she was cooking the meals, and eventually, fleshing out the hides for him. She realized she was no more than a slave, and someone for him to touch at night. She thought if she ever found her father or brother,
she vowed she would tell them to make him pay for his treatment of her.

  The winter nights were filled with Griz pawing her, and her days were filled with constant chores she was expected to accomplish. Most of the time he never let her wear anything but the nightshirt, ‘so if he had a mind to…he could tend to her.’

  The days somehow merged into nightly demands, and then back to days again. Sometimes, in between her trying to accomplish her chores, and he happened to be in the cabin, he would lift the nightshirt while she stood washing the dishes, and put his hands on her, not finding satisfaction until she confessed to him that she enjoyed it and it made her feel better. In truth, it only made her feel worse. The only saving grace was that he never tried to go beyond his touching her, and she had to give thanks for small blessings.

  Eventually, the snow began to melt. Mackenzie was able to put more weight on her foot, even though she limped slightly and could only walk for a short period of time, before she needed to rest. Griz was secretly happy she was having a hard time walking because he was sure it was a way to keep her there with him since, even if she did try to escape, it wouldn’t take much to catch up to her and drag her back.

  He never called her by her name. She was always Missy to him. Perhaps it made her feel less of an individual to him by not allowing himself to use her real name. There was always that slight twinge of guilt, which he had to work hard on trying to tamp down when she glared at him with a mixture of hatred and fear in her eyes.

  “I’m goin’ up the mountain taday ta see ifen I ken find any signs of what happened ta yer family,” Griz informed Mackenzie, about a week after the last of the snow had melted, when they finished eating the breakfast she had cooked them. “If ya want ta come, yer welcome, but it might be taxing on yer foot,” he added,