What's Real

by Daaimah S. Poole

  Natalie called me. I couldn’t wait to hear how she got Anthony to come home. I know it had to be drama-filled. “What’s up, Nat? Hold up, there is someone at the door. Hold on.”

  “Go ahead,” she said. I went to the door and peeped out. There was a delivery guy with flowers. He brought in all different kinds of bouquets with sunflowers in them. The delivery guy asked if it was my birthday. I said no, then he asked did my husband do something wrong. I told him no again. Then he said I must be a lucky girl and asked me to sign for the flowers. I thanked him again and let him out of the house.

  I picked up the phone again and Natalie said, “You have a good man. He brought you flowers?”

  “Yes, a lot of them. Oh my God. Dame is so thoughtful.” I read the card to Natalie. It said Janelle, you have brought sunshine into my life when it was cloudy, and love into my heart when there was hate. I love you, girl. Damon. P.S., Look in the refrigerator. I went into the refrigerator and saw a large black jewelry box. I opened it and it was a watch.

  “What kind of watch did he give you?” Natalie asked.

  “A Franck Mueller watch. It’s pink with diamonds all around the wrist.” I tried it on.

  “I never heard of that. It must be real expensive. That girl Kelly that you hang out with will know.”

  “She probably will. She prices everything. So, what’s up with Tanya?”

  “Her usual partying.”

  “When is she going to grow up?”

  “Um, I don’t know.”

  “I got to go, Janelle. Anthony is on his way home.”

  I called Damon to thank him for my flowers and watch.

  “Dame, I called to say thank you for the flower and watch.”

  “No problem, baby, just wanted to thank you for being my sunshine. I know I have been out of it lately. I wanted you to know it wasn’t you. I just got a lot going on, okay?”

  “Yes.”

  “We got to go to Lisa and Stephen’s tonight.”

  “Why?”

  “Amber and James got married over the weekend in Vegas,” Damon said.

  “Aw, that is so nice.”

  “They are having a get-together today at Lisa and Stephen’s to celebrate.”

  “When?”

  “At five.”

  “Do they live far?”

  “No, right over in Coral Gables.”

  I didn’t know what to wear. I had a lot of clothes, but nothing that matched. I had cute sandals that matched with a shirt, but no pants. Or really nice accessories that didn’t go with anything. I decided on a salmon-pink dress.

  You couldn’t even walk up to Lisa and Stephen’s house if you wanted to. You had to drive. I’ve seen nice houses before, but I didn’t know people really live like this. Damon’s house was my apartment compared to this. Lisa welcomed us into her home. She had a lilac orchid in her hair and a white dress on. Damon gave her a hug, and I said hello. They had a gigantic Olympic-size pool, winding stairs, a view of the ocean, and high ceilings. She told me to feel free to look around. She must have known I was amazed. I saw Kelly talking to Amber. I walked over and congratulated Amber.

  “Nice rock, huh? And to think nobody thought he was going to marry her,” Kelly mumbled after Amber left. With her champagne flute in her hand, Kelly ranted on, “Well, he had better give her something after all those kids.”

  Changing the subject I asked, “How many bedrooms in this place?”

  “Seven bedrooms and six and a half baths. I told you this house was breathtaking.”

  Lisa walked over and said, “Are you okay?” I told her I was. “Did you eat?” Lisa asked.

  “No, not yet, but I will,” I said.

  “You have to try my pollo agridulce. You’ll love it, Janelle,” she said as she offered me some from off her plate. I took a little and asked what type of meat it was.

  “It is a Cuban-style chicken.”

  “It’s good but very spicy.”

  “So you’re the next one that better hear wedding bells, Kelly,” Lisa said.

  “Yeah, then maybe Janelle,” Kelly responded.

  “I’m not in a rush. We just met,” I said as I walked away and located Damon.

  We ate, mingled, said our goodbyes and then headed towards home. The sky was becoming dark and the palm trees were swaying from the blowing wind. It was about to rain. I could smell it. As soon as we drove in the driveway the rain began to pour. We didn’t have an umbrella so we had to run in the house. Damon locked the door and came and sat on the sofa with me. I thanked him again for the watch as I held my wrist out to look at it. He said anything for my lady. I kissed him and sat on his lap. I pressed my body against his and began to slowly gyrate. He then glided his hands across my breasts. I took my pants and underwear off. He unbuttoned his pants and slid his underwear down. I sat on his laps my back to him and inserted his hard dick into me. I began bouncing up and down, twisting my hips around and around in a wave motion. He was loving it. He moaned my name and said I was the best thing that ever happened to him. I told him I loved everything about him. We rested a moment then we ordered a sausage pizza and stayed in the bed snuggling the rest of the night.

  Chapter Thirty-four

  Natalie

  “Anthony, what’s in that case?”

  “It’s a gun.”

  “What are you doing with a gun?”

  “I got it for protection. I started going to the gun range when we were apart.”

  “Well, I don’t like guns and I don’t want it around the baby.”

  “Shut up. The baby is not even old enough to reach the gun, and by the time he is, I will talk to him about it.”

  “Get it out of my house. Take it back to your mother’s. I don’t like guns. They are dangerous. My dad’s partner’s son found his gun when we were younger and accidentally shot himself in the neck. He is paralyzed now.”

  “I’ll take it to my mother’s.”

  Anthony paid for the baby to go back to day care. I could look for a job for real now or go back to school. And in the meantime continue to help my mom with the shop.

  I want to look good for my man. I was still maintaining my weight by going to my aerobics class. I was down eleven pounds now. I could see it in my face and even my neck looked thin. I was on my way. I put on my 14 jeans and they were loose. All I want to do is lose like fifteen more pounds and skip over a size 12 and go right into a 10.

  When I go to the market I have two lists. My diet food list and Anthony and the baby’s list. When Anthony was not there, I didn’t have to cook. I could eat healthy all I wanted to. Now that he is home, I got to make these big starchy dinners because that’s what he likes. I make chicken breast, buttery garlic noodles, spinach, and rolls. I just eat chicken and spinach. I gave Anthony his plate in the living room and sat down with mine. We were watching videos on 106 & Park.

  “Why don’t you have any noodles on your plate?” Anthony asked.

  “Because I’m on a diet.”

  “What diet you on that you can eat meat and no noodles?”

  “Low carb, Anthony,” I said as I changed the station.

  “You know you hungry. Won’t you eat some?” he said as he offered me some of his garlic noodles.

  “No, thanks,” I said.

  “Why are you working out so much? You already look good, baby,” he said.

  I thanked him and gave him a kiss.

  Chapter Thirty-five

  Tanya

  I went and signed Davon up for summer school. I was so mad it had to come out of my pocket for this shit. But I wasn’t going to let him get left down.

  “Listen, Davon, you are going to go here and you are going to listen and learn. If I get one phone call I’m going to fuck you up.”

  “Yes,” he said.

  “All you got to do is shut up and pay attention and you will pass. It is not that difficult. Don’t make me waste my money on this if you’re not going to do the right thing. Do you want to be in the same grade again?”


  “No,” he answered.

  “Then go to class. You better fucking pass.”

  I had another dream about Barry. I was talking to him, telling him I loved him and wanted to be his wife. Then I asked him for some money and he pulled it out and this girl walked up and said, “How you going to give her money, Barry? I need that money to buy our baby stuff.”

  I turned around and looked at Barry. He said he didn’t have no baby by her and he ain’t buying her baby shit. “Is that your baby, Barry?” He didn’t say anything and just as he was about to answer me I bashed the girl in the head with my fist, but only I couldn’t hit her hard enough. My punches were weak. She kept laughing at me and when I looked up, Barry was gone. I got out of bed, turned on the light, went in my closet, and pulled out my photo album. I flipped through the pages and found the pictures of me and Barry. Sometimes I think I’m going to forget what Barry looks like. One picture we were at Davon’s first birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese. Another was a Polaroid picture from the arcade when I was pregnant with Deja. I miss Barry so much. Why was he taken away from me? I think sometimes about the what-ifs. What if I was there and I could have made him duck the bullet or warned him? Or if we would have been out somewhere instead of him being with Moe? Then none of this would have happened and everything would be okay. He would be here and I wouldn’t have to do nothing. I heard a knock on the door. I went downstairs and peeked out the window to see who it was. It was Ms. Tee for Mom-Mom.

  Ms. Tee was my grandmom’s best friend; she lived across the street. Ms. Tee was a light pecan color with jet-black, wavy hair. She had a solid thick build and a slight limp. Ever since I could remember she always wore a lot of jewelry. I thought she was rich when I was younger. She had a bunch of golden bracelets that sang a tune every time she walked. Gold hoop earrings and five necklaces that went from smaller to larger around her neck. I opened the door and said, “Ms. Tee, my grandmother’s not here.”

  “Do you know where she went?”

  “No, she didn’t tell me.”

  “Well, tell her I stopped by. You know Nene just had her baby? That makes five.”

  “Five.”

  “Yup, I told her she can’t come back and stay with me. She better try to make it work with this one’s dad.”

  “Okay, Ms. Tee,” I said as I closed the door. I don’t know why she sat up here and told me about Nene. She knows we can’t stand each other. I hated her granddaughter Nene. Me and Nene used to get into fights all the time when we were young. She used to dress and act like an old-fashioned grandmom was raising her. My grandmom kept my clothes up to date and in style because she was a little fly herself.

  That little bitch gave me the roughest time when I first moved in with my grandmother. She kept bothering me all day at school. She kept telling people I started school in the middle of the year because my mom was on the pipe. She was so jealous of me because I had nice clothes and pretty hair. I kept telling that girl to mind her business, but she kept running her big mouth. She knew my business because of her grandmom. Next thing I remember I was at lunch and a boy name Jermaine said there was going to be a fight after school. I asked him who was fighting and that’s when he said, “Nene and you, dummy.” The time was 2:49. I was about to piss on myself. School was out and everybody was gathering to see the fight. I started walking and everybody started following me. The crowd got larger and larger. Kids that didn’t even go to our school joined the fifty or more students in the crowd. Someone yelled, “Who’s fighting?”

  “Nene and some new girl,” yelled another back in the crowd.

  I was the one fighting and somehow had made my way to the back of the fight procession. I was ready to sneak off and run the other way. Before I had the chance the swarm of kids who needed to go home and do some homework, instead of watching a fight, parted. And from the other side came Nene punching her fist into the palm of her other hand. In fear, I dropped my book bag, just looked Nene in her face, and was trying to think of a plan. I didn’t get a chance though. Someone pushed me into Nene. Then I recall closing my eyes and swinging really hard. I didn’t feel or hear anything. Then I noticed I was getting help, but where was it coming from? I didn’t know anyone, that is, except for this other girl from our neighborhood named Shaylene. She was like two grades ahead of us. I fell to the ground, opened my eyes, and saw Shaylene beating Nene in her head and pulling all her hair out.

  The only thing that saved that girl was the whistling of the lunch aides’ whistles. I located my bag and was out and so was everybody else. Wasn’t nobody trying to get caught by those Lunch Aides so they could get suspended.

  Somehow me and Shaylene made it to my house at the same time. We were both out of breath. We sat on the steps and caught our breath. I was huffing and puffing. Then that’s when Shaylene said, “You was kicking Nene’s ass.”

  “So, why you jumped in it?” I asked as I punched her in her arm. “Now everybody going to say I can’t fight,” I said.

  “Nobody ain’t going to say that.”

  “Yes, they is,” I said. I didn’t know a lot about fighting, but I did know you shouldn’t get help, especially when you were winning.

  “Girl, don’t worry about me jumping in your fight. Be concerned about her telling your grandmother on you.”

  “How she gonna find out?”

  “I don’t know, but if she do, the lie is that she was getting the best of you. If you need me to tell your grandmother, I will tell her what happened. Just knock on my door.”

  “Okay, thanks.”

  I never thought twice about Nene telling, ’cause she was tough and the Lunch Aides didn’t catch up with us, so we were cool. At least that’s what I thought.

  As soon as Mom-Mom got off work, Ms. Tee was at the door with Nene. And she had a black eye. I wondered who did that, me or Shaylene? Either way it didn’t matter. She got her ass whooped. I ran into my room. Then I came out into the hallway so I could hear what was going on. Peeping downstairs, I heard Nene lying, saying I said her grandmother was fat, and she was defending herself when I punched her in the eye. Mom-Mom looked up the steps and saw me and said, “Tanya Lewis, get your ass down here.”

  I came down the steps.

  “Now what happened? Why is this girl’s eye black?” my grandmother asked as she held her hand in my face.

  I was shaking, I thought Mom-Mom was going to hit me. She said get over here, right here. I came a little closer, but jumped back when I reached her. Then I told her the truth. “Mom-Mom, she’s lying. She was at school all day saying my mom was a piper and smoker on drugs and that’s why I started school in the middle of the year. Then she asked to fight me after school. Shaylene saw it and she broke it up.”

  Ms. Tee looked over at Nene and smacked her right in her lip. She had a red swollen lip to match her black eye.

  “Why you do that, Grandma?” Nene cried.

  “’Cause you don’t be talking about nobody’s mom when your mom is on drugs too! You want to make fun of someone, make fun of the way your ass is on punishment for the next week.

  “Sorry about that Henrietta. I’ll call you later after the numbers go off.” Ms. Tee walked across the street with her slight limp. I couldn’t believe Nene’s mom was doing drugs too!

  After that day, I tried to be Nene’s friend, but she was too mean. I asked her to play double Dutch with me and this other fat girl named Ieasha, who always had candy. Nene played with us. That is, until it was her time to jump. She didn’t even get to “Big Mac Filet a Fish jumping.” She couldn’t jump, so she got mad at us. She snatched the rope and it almost smacked me in my face. She said, “This is my rope and I don’t want to play anymore.”

  By then I would tell her, why don’t she go across the street, her and her dumb rope? That’s when me and Ieasha would start playing by ourselves. I would bring out my Barbies. I had the Barbie pool and dollhouse; my grandmom bought me whatever I wanted. Nene would usually just look at us from across the street wi
th her lips poked out, looking mad. Then she would be back across the street about a half hour later and apologize and we’d play like nothing ever happened. Until she got in my face again.

  And now, to think she has five kids and still managed to get her shit right to be trying to go to school. And I thought I had too many kids. Well if she can do it I know I can. She is not as smart as me. Maybe one day I’ll go to one of them schools.

  Chapter Thirty-six

  Janelle

  I called home. My little brother Taron answered. “Where’s Mommy? She didn’t get home from work yet?”

  “No, she’s not here. I’m home by myself.”

  “Where’s Jamal?”

  “He went to his friend’s house to do a project.”

  “You get the jerseys I sent y’all?”

  “Oh yeah, I wanted to ask you, can you ask Damon if he can get Ricky Williams to sign my jersey? Because it will be worth a lot of money on eBay.”

  “No, I can’t do that. Just be happy with what I sent you.”

  “Man, you make me sick. Don’t nobody want no stupid jersey without an autograph on it.”

  “You are so ungrateful. Bye, Taron.” I was looking for Kelly. I called her voice mail and I got this weird message. “Hello, you have reached Solel Flowers. Thank you for calling. Please leave your name and number and we will contact you as soon as we can.” I called Kelly at home.

  “Why do you have that flower message on your answering machine?”

  “Oh, Janelle, I can’t go to the mall with you. I’m doing an investigation right now.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “I found Carl’s cell phone bill and I’m calling every number and girl on there.”