Broken and Beautiful

by Ryan, Kendall

  The fact that I want to be around Cami says a whole lot, and that scares the shit out of me. I know I shouldn’t let her get too close, knowing I could break her, but when it comes to Cami, I’m a selfish prick.

  I don’t think I could stay away at this point even if I wanted to. I know I should. But that isn’t stopping me anytime soon, and that’s enough to make me hate myself.

  * * *

  It’s past six by the time I make it to the rental property, due to being held up at the office. Cami’s car isn’t parked next door, so I grab Peter’s attention when I see him step outside with the trash.

  “Where’s Cami?” I stop beside him and he looks surprised for a moment, before he shakes his head.

  “Her and Veronica went to The Home Barn to look at furniture.” He tosses the bag into the trashcan and narrows his eyes at me. “What’s the deal with you and Cami anyway? I hope you don’t plan to come along and hurt her. She’s already been through enough with Douglas. You may be the guy I pay rent to each month, and I respect that, but that won’t stop me from protecting family.”

  “Hopefully you won’t have to.” I flex my jaw and run a hand through my hair, just the thought of hurting Cami angering me. “I have to go.”

  Rushing to my truck, I hop in and head to the furniture store, hoping to catch Cami there. When I pull up, though, her vehicle is already gone. I run inside anyway to get details of her order.

  Ryan Hannington is at the desk when I walk in and offers me a nod and a forced smile. “Hey, Jensen. Can I help you with something?”

  “I need some info on an order someone possibly just placed. I want all the details.”

  He gives me a questioning look, but starts typing something on the computer. “You know I could get in trouble for this, right?”

  I lean over the desk and look him square in the eyes. “And you know you still owe me from three years ago when you skipped out on two months’ worth of rent, right?” He nods. “Good. Her name is Camille Reynolds. Tell me what she ordered.”

  It takes him a few minutes to pull up her info. “Looks like she bought a queen bedroom set and two lamps.” He scrolls down some more, squinting his eyes to see the details on the computer. “And she put a couch and a chair on a six-month payment plan.”

  My stomach knots up at the idea of Cami not having any damn furniture in her house. I’m tempted to find Douglas in his home and kick the shit out of him. This isn’t her problem. She shouldn’t be the one struggling to start over.

  “Cancel the payment plan.” I toss a handful of cash onto the desk. “How much?”

  Twenty minutes later, I’m loading my truck up with the items she couldn’t afford and heading back to the rental property. Cami’s vehicle is still gone when I get back and I’m glad.

  She’d probably kick my ass for going behind her back and paying for her furniture, but I don’t give a shit. I’d let her do anything she wants to me. There’s no way in hell I’m letting her sit on the floor while Douglas is all cozy in their old home.

  Not happening.

  After setting up Cami’s furniture, I kick back with a beer and look the house over to see if I missed replacing anything on the list. I’m in the master bedroom looking at the blue fucking walls when I hear Cami’s little car pull up next door.

  I go to the porch and light up a smoke, watching as Cami steps out of her vehicle, her eyes landing directly on mine. She looks stressed, and I hate that look on her.

  Moments later, Veronica steps out of the passenger side and they both walk to the trunk as it opens. I notice Cami pull out a box and I immediately toss my half-smoked cigarette and rush over to her before she can make it to Veronica’s porch.

  “That’s not going in there.” She gives me a surprised look when I grab the box from her hand. “It’s going in your house where it goes.”

  She flashes me a tired smile, before yawning. “Are you sure? It’s not moving day yet and I’m too tired to have to move these boxes more than once. If you’re going to give me trouble, I’d rather wait.”

  “I said they’re going to your house, Cami. Don’t question me.” I flex my jaw and exhale, hating that she thinks I’m here to fuck with her. “And don’t touch any more boxes. Get some food and let me handle this.”

  “Jensen—”

  “Dammit, Cami.” I grab her chin and force her to look up at me. “Let me take care of this. This isn’t the time to fight me.”

  She stares at me in silence for a moment, before nodding her head. “Okay. Thank you.”

  “And tell Veronica not to touch any of the boxes either.” With that, I make my way across the yard to drop off the first box. It takes me a good thirty minutes to unpack all of the boxes from the trunk, and since I want to give Cami time to eat and relax, I spend the next hour giving the house a final cleaning.

  I’m in the middle of drying my hands and look over when I hear the front door open, followed by Cami’s light footsteps as she steps into the living room, her mouth hanging open in surprise.

  “Wait? What?” She walks around the couch, running her hand over the soft fabric. “How did this get here? I didn’t… Did these get delivered by accident?”

  I shake my head and wrap an arm around Cami’s waist to pull her against my front. “These aren’t here by accident, Cami. I delivered them.”

  “What?” She spins around in my arms, her eyes moving up to meet mine. “I don’t understand. How did you—”

  “I have my ways. All you need to know is that you’re taken care of, Cami. Fuck sitting on the floor because you can’t afford furniture.”

  Her face hardens, as if she’s embarrassed that I found out. “It’s not that I… You know what, never mind. Take it back. I can figure it out myself, Jensen. I’m not a fucking charity case that you need to feel sorry for. I will never be that. I…” She points to her chest. “Can take care of myself. Take it with you when you leave tonight. I mean it.”

  She goes to walk away, but I grip her arm and yank her to my chest, hard. “I didn’t fucking say that and that’s not what I meant. I don’t expect you to be able to afford everything at once after just moving into a damn house. So stop arguing and fucking accept the furniture, because it’s not leaving this house.”

  “You’re an asshole,” she whispers.

  I smile and run my thumb over her bottom lip. “Yeah, but you like it. Admit it.” I move in closer and hover my lips over hers. “And you’ve been thinking about me since I left the school this afternoon. Say it.”

  “Maybe I haven’t.” She tries to lie, but her voice shakes, giving her away. “Maybe I haven’t thought about you at all today.”

  Growling, I grab the back of her hair and move my lips over hers. “We both know that’s a fucking lie. You’ve been thinking about me just as much as I’ve been thinking about you.”

  Her eyes soften as they study mine. “You’ve been thinking about me?” She looks completely surprised that I’d be thinking about her when she’s not around.

  Hell, I am too.

  I nod and kiss her bottom lip. “So fucking much, Cami. You’re all I’ve been thinking about, and it’s driving me fucking mad. Why do you think your living room is furnished? I’m losing my fucking mind.”

  Her eyes scan mine for a moment, before she yanks me to her and kisses me hard on the lips. When she goes to pull away, I grab the back of her head before she can get too far. “How much is left at Douglas’? I want to be there for the next trip.”

  She shakes her head. “None. I don’t want anything that was ours. I want a fresh start that doesn’t remind me of the five-year mistake I made. I have my clothes and everything that is important to me and that’s all I need. Veronica has already offered to give me some things she doesn’t need for the kitchen. Everything else I can just buy along the way.”

  “Are those things packed?”

  She nods. “The box is sitting in her kitchen.”

  After pressing my lips to hers, I walk away to get the t
hings she needs from next door. I want to help her get as settled in as we can right now, and since her bedroom set doesn’t arrive until tomorrow, unpacking the kitchen is a start.

  “I hate that you did this, Jensen. But…” Cami smiles at me from her new couch when I walk inside holding the box of kitchen utensils. “This couch is incredibly comfortable. Wow. It truly is amazing.” She runs her hands over the dark fabric as if she can’t get enough. “I’ll pay you back every cent. Even if you have to charge me extra for rent. I promise.”

  “You paying me back is the last thing I’m worried about, Cami. That shit isn’t happening until you’re all settled in and this house is completely furnished.” I set the box down on the kitchen island, before ripping the tape off. “Then we’ll discuss it.”

  She joins me in the kitchen and we both dig into the box to start putting things away. It feels natural to do this with her, and I’m not sure how to feel about that. It’s not like we’re going to live here together, but maybe in some fucked-up way I know I’ll be spending a lot of time here.

  “How was work?” she questions from the silverware drawer. “Busy day?”

  “Every day is a busy day. I can’t remember a day that I’ve been able to relax and just say fuck everything. But I wouldn’t have it any other way. Guys like me need the distraction.”

  “What do you mean guys like you? Good guys that go out of their way to help people? Because that’s what you did today.”

  My chest tightens. It’s been a long time since I’ve been referred to as a ‘good guy’. “I’m not all good, Cami.”

  “You’re not all bad, either.” She grabs the plate I’m about to put away from my hand, grabs my shirt, and pulls me to her. “Even if you want me to believe that. I can’t. It’s bullshit, Jensen. And you know it.”

  “Is it?” I ask stiffly. “What makes you so sure?”

  “I can feel it,” she whispers against my lips. “I feel it in my heart and soul every time you kiss me. Stop hiding from me, Jensen. Stop being afraid to break me. You’re not a monster.”

  My heart races from the way she’s looking at me, and before I stop myself, I’m yanking her to me so I can kiss her long and hard and claim her as mine.

  Fuck, I love kissing her.

  Cami

  Going to Douglas’ house to grab the rest of my things yesterday was harder than expected. Not because I miss Douglas. That’s definitely not it. There’s not one thing I miss about that jerk.

  It just felt weird knowing that after living there with him for five years I’ll no longer be going back to that place. Not even to visit. It became familiar to me. It was my place of comfort, and now I have to start all over again somewhere new.

  If it wasn’t for Veronica being right next door, I’m not sure how long it would take me to get used to living in a new place, and alone on top of that. It’s going to be lonely at first, but I know with the help of my best friend and her husband I’ll get over it pretty quickly. She even offered to stay with me for the first few nights, but I told her no, because I don’t want to take her away from Peter. They’ve both done more than enough for me already.

  I owe them both so much. Even if it means cooking tacos for them every day for a whole year, I’ll do it.

  Stepping out back, I hurry toward my car, anxious to get to my new place and wait for my bedroom furniture to arrive. I know it won’t be there for a few more hours, but that doesn’t stop the excitement I feel at knowing that today is officially moving day. Jensen promised to be there with the contract, and even offered to help put the bedroom set together since the furniture store doesn’t offer assembly.

  “How about some ice cream?”

  My heart jumps when Jensen’s deep voice comes from out of nowhere. It’s not until I turn around that I realize while lost in thought, I walked right by Jensen’s truck. He’s standing there with his arms crossed and Benny at his side. They’re both looking at me as if they’re up to no good.

  “Ice cream?” I ask with a smile.

  “Yeah, Miss Reynolds. This new ice cream place is the best! Jensen took me there when it first opened. You have to come. You won’t regret it.”

  I cross my arms and focus my attention on Jensen, who now has a full-on grin on his face. “Is that right? I won’t regret it?”

  “You definitely won’t regret it. Especially since you get to go with us. We’ll make sure you pick out the right stuff.” He messes up Benny’s hair.

  “Hey!” Benny laughs and fixes his hair. “I worked hard on this style today. Just like how you taught me.”

  Jensen laughs and opens the backdoor of the truck for Benny to jump in, before opening the front door and nodding for me to join them. “Get in.”

  I uncross my arms and narrow my eyes at him. “Okay. But only because Benny asked,” I tease. “He’s too cute to refuse.”

  “Cuter than me?” Jensen questions, brow raised.

  “Yes. Even cuter than you.” I give his chest a light push and prepare to climb into the truck, but he grabs my waist and pulls me in for a kiss. My heart soars the moment his lips capture mine, and when he pulls away my legs feel shaky.

  “I’ve been waiting all day to do that. Now you can get in.”

  I can’t stop the smile on my face as I climb into the truck, and Jensen closes the door behind me. Things have changed between the two of us, and the more time we spend together, the more it starts to feel like we’re a real couple. I should be scared of getting my heart broken by him. Especially with the way he keeps saying he’s going to. Terrified in fact, but it’s not enough to keep me away. I’m drawn to Jensen unlike I’ve ever been to anyone else in the past. He somehow found a way to have me thinking about him from the very first day we met to now, no matter how hard I tried not to. And boy did I try.

  The ice cream place is only a few blocks away, so within minutes we pull up and Benny jumps out in a rush, yelling for us to hurry as he runs toward the door. With a carefree smile, Jensen grabs my hand and guides me across the lot with him.

  “About time. Jeez! All the good stuff is going to be gone soon.” Benny uncrosses his arms when we finally make it to him, which is only seconds later, but he makes it seem like it’s minutes. “Come on. Let’s go!”

  Jensen shakes his head and opens the door for us. “You better save me some brownies this time, Benny. Don’t be stingy this time.”

  “Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.” Benny is at the counter ordering his ice cream before the door even has a chance to close behind us.

  We all order the same thing and spend the next twenty minutes or so laughing and joking around while we eat it. Seeing the way Jensen is with Benny only has me falling deeper for him. Seeing this side of him is truly a beautiful thing, and the fact he is letting me see the two of them together is huge for both of us.

  “…heck yeah. I kick butt at that game,” Benny brags with excitement when Jensen mentions a videogame he bought for Benny a while back. “Grams let me play it the other night and I won three out of four times. You should’ve been there to see it.”

  “I’ll see what I can do next week. Maybe Grams will let you come to my place for the weekend and you can teach me how to play. How does that sound?”

  “That would be so awesome!” Benny high fives Jensen from across the table before turning to me. “Are you good at basketball, Miss Reynolds? I don’t know if girls are any good or not. I’ve never seen one play before.”

  I laugh and shake my head. “I can’t say that I am. But maybe I’ll have to learn someday. Some girls are good at it, though.”

  “I can teach you like Jensen taught me!” Benny jumps up and starts pretending like he’s dribbling a basketball before throwing it into an invisible hoop. “Nothing but net.”

  “Don’t be a show off,” Jensen teases. “Or I’ll eat the rest of your ice cream.”

  Benny quickly sits down and grabs his bowl, pulling it to him. “I don’t think so. I’ve been waiting all week for ice cream. I’ll show off some ot
her time.”

  I can’t help but smile at Benny and Jensen as they continue to joke with each other. A smile hasn’t left Benny’s face the entire time, until Jensen pulls up to his Grams’ house to drop him off. It’s easy to see the disappointment on both of their faces when Benny climbs out and walks to meet his Grams in the driveway.

  Jensen is silent for a while after dropping Benny off, so I don’t question him when he heads to the house instead of back to the school where my car is.

  “Benny is a great kid,” I say when we get to the porch. “You’re good with him. Really good, in fact.”

  He nods and pulls a key from his pocket, handing it to me. “This is yours. I have duplicates inside on the kitchen island.” He crosses his arms and smiles when I do. “Congratulations. You’re officially fucking your landlord. How does it feel?”

  His words cause a surge of heat through my body, but I do my best to play it off. The thought may have me wet, but he doesn’t need to know. “Not as hot as I thought it would, to be honest.”

  “Fuck that.” He pushes me through the door and slams it shut behind us. “Don’t make me have to remind you just how fucking hot it is, Cami. I don’t give two shits that your bedroom furniture is arriving any minute now. I’ll remind you right here against this fucking door if I have to.”

  My face breaks into a smile and he flexes his jaw, clearly annoyed that I’m pretending sex with him isn’t the hottest thing I’ve done in my entire existence. “You’re not officially my landlord until I sign the contract. Maybe it’ll be hotter once that happens.”

  “Fuck, Cami. Sign it and let’s find out.” He grunts and heads to the kitchen as if he’s in a hurry to test the theory. Right when he grabs the pen to hand it to me, the doorbell rings. “Son of a bitch.” He pushes down on his erection, before adjusting it and gripping the counter in annoyance. “Answer the door.”

  With a laugh, I answer the door and stand back as Jensen shows them where everything goes, as if he’s going to be living here too. It makes me feel safer for a moment, until I realize that tonight will be my first night alone in this big house.