Loving Liberty

by Belinda Boring

  Thankfully, there weren’t many people waiting for the elevators to the observation deck. We stood in the short line, Oliver standing behind with his arms wrapped loosely around me. I could’ve remained like that forever. The gesture may have been a natural one to others; but to me, it represented the security I’d always craved. These were the moments I’d daydream about—simple ones that meant everything.

  “I can’t believe you haven’t grilled me about why I brought you here.” Oliver chuckled. The elevator doors closed and there was that brief, funny sensation as the carriage began to rise.

  “I didn’t think it would help,” I admitted, leaning my head back against his chest.

  “That’s the best part of surprises . . . trying to convince the other person to tell you,” he whispered in my ear. Having his mouth so close, I wanted to turn around and kiss him. Maybe that was part of the process he talked about.

  “Like this?” With nothing stopping me from acting on my thoughts, I faced him and rose up on my tiptoes, my lips hovering over his.

  He cocked his eyebrow, approvingly. “Imagine that. Looks like you’re going to be a quick study.” His gaze dropped to my mouth and his dimples surfaced when he grinned. “Unfortunately, there won’t be any need to convince me.”

  “Why?” I really wanted to kiss him.

  “Because we’re here.” He leaned forward suddenly and brushed his lips over mine. The elevator doors slid open and happily I followed him out onto the floor. It was mostly enclosed, aside from the open observation deck outside the glass doors. Placing his hand on my lower back, he guided me toward them. “After you, Liberty.”

  I wasn’t expecting the strong breeze when I stepped outside, and part of me worried about how high up we were; wondering just how solid the walkway was. My first few steps were halted and tentative, much to Oliver’s amusement.

  “You’re safe. The Space Needle is structurally sound. See?” When he jumped up and down, my heart instantly rose to my throat. I slapped him gently for teasing me and opened my mouth to say something when the view grabbed my full attention.

  It was breathtaking. Forgetting my fear and leaving the doorway, it was difficult to take it all in. Everything was lit up—buildings, traffic, streetlights, and piers. I’d never seen anything like this. Even from this height everything bustled with activity, the city was alive.

  “This is incredible,” I said, awestruck. My eyes widened the more I looked. The platform went around in a circle, giving me a bird’s eye view of Seattle. It was a beautiful city and it reaffirmed my determination to explore it at ground level. “I’ve lived here all my life and I’ve never it seen it like this.”

  “Most don’t. I try to come up here every now and then. It’s a great place to think.” Taking my hand, we walked around slowly, stopping whenever something caught my eye. Eventually, Oliver brought us back to where we could best see Pier 57. The Ferris Wheel was making its round, the bright lights capturing my attention. I remembered that day when we’d gone on the ride—how happy I’d been and our “almost” kiss. So much had happened since then.

  “I can see why you would.” Peering over the railing, the ground seemed so far away. Oliver was once again behind me, holding me in his arms, our bodies touching. Neither of us wanted to be out of arms reach—seeming to need that contact. It was one of the first things I noticed after he arrived at my apartment. It was comforting, perfect.

  “It’s also a great place to gain perspective,” he added. He tightened his embrace as the cool wind picked up, causing me to smile again. It was these thoughtful considerations that made me love him more. He didn’t have to be asked or coerced; Oliver saw a need and took care of it.

  “Is that why we’re here?” I asked. Something told me it was. After today’s revelations and decision, this would be the ideal place to reaffirm it, with the whole city laid out before us.

  “Yes. Tell me what you see when you look out.”

  My hands gripped the railing as I leaned forward. “I see a world I don’t know a lot about.” There was sadness in my voice.

  “You’ll work on that, sweetheart. We all feel that way, at times. What else?”

  “Seattle is so full of life. So many people, each of them going about their business.” My eyes followed the different cars and I let out a heavy sigh. “They all seem to have purpose. Unlike me.” Suddenly I didn’t feel so exited anymore. “I feel lost, Oliver. Being up here reminds me that making this decision has changed everything.”

  “Are you starting to regret it?” There was no mistaking his concern.

  “Never. But I need to be realistic. Deciding to live my life was only the first step. I’d be a fool to think it was that easy. There will be consequences. I don’t even have a plan.” There was no holding the anxiety back.

  “Sssh,” Oliver soothed, kissing the side of my head. “I didn’t bring you up here to make you panic. One thing I know is that when things appear scary, studying it from a different perspective can help it become manageable. Yes, your life changed tonight; but you do have purpose. Just like everyone down there.”

  “How? Everything I’ve done up to this point has been decided by my parents.”

  “What do you think they’re thinking? I can almost guarantee they don’t have their whole lives mapped out, either. Some may have a rough idea, but most of us live in the moment. We’re just trying to figure it out day to day, doing the best we can to live our dreams.”

  “We?” I turned around to face him.

  “We all feel lost. Especially when life throws us a curveball and leaves us scrambling to figure out what our next move is. That’s part of being alive. No one’s future is set in stone—it’s built from our choices and actions. Every day we take risks, we follow our instincts, and most of us make mistakes. Don’t ever be afraid of failure. That’s where miracles happen.”

  “When you say things like that, it makes me believe you.” I wanted to, his earnest expression tugging at my heart. “Is this how you felt when you made your decision?”

  “I was terrified when I told my father. In fact, I almost threw up the second the words came out. He’d had me so beat down that walking out his front door for the last time, I almost turned back. I had no clue what my next move was, only that it was the right thing.” Oliver rested his hands on either side of me, his weight held by the railing. “And yes, I felt incredibly lost.”

  “But look at you now,” I whispered.

  “Yes. I survived. That’s why I know you’ll be okay, too.”

  A tear fell, tracing the curve of my cheek. “How can you be sure?”

  Oliver took my hand and placed it over my chest. “What does your heart tell you?”

  “That I’m scared,” I confessed.

  “Beneath that, though. Don’t just see the surface. Beyond the fear and uncertainty, what do you feel?”

  I pushed past the panic and distress and was surprised what I found. “Wow.”

  “Tell me,” Oliver gently urged.

  “I feel hope and excitement for my future.” I pushed a little deeper and gasped. “And strength that no matter what, I’ll be okay. How did you know?”

  “Because I see it every time I look at you.” Oliver captured strands of my hair from the wind and tucked them behind my ear. “That’s why I brought you up here to celebrate. Yes, you feel overwhelmed right now and it all seems daunting, but everything you need to get through it is inside you.” He cocked his head slightly, smiling at me again. “Plus, you’re not alone. You have me.”

  “Thank you,” I murmured against his chest, my arms now around his waist. Hearing his heartbeat helped soothe my worry, giving me something else to focus on instead of the “what ifs” stirring in my head. Everything he said made sense. I simply needed to believe it enough that the doubts couldn’t take root again.

  “Now, tell me what you see when you look out across Seattle this time.” Oliver gently spun my body around, embracing me with his warmth.

 
“Some of the same things, but I’m more curious. I want to know what my purpose is, find out who I am.”

  “It’ll come. You’ve already begun the journey.”

  “So, what do you see?” I couldn’t help from asking.

  “Possibility. Potential. Growth.” He sounded somewhat wistful in my ear. “It’s been a few years for me since I made my stand to my father. I’ve accomplished a lot, but there’s always more to learn.”

  “You came up here, didn’t you?” He didn’t have to reply, I’d already suspected the answer.

  “I did and I keep coming back whenever I need to remember my reasons for leaving.”

  “Thank you for bringing me here, too.” An employee came out onto the deck, letting us, and the few others, know it was almost time to close. “Wow, we’ve been here for a while.”

  “I knew it helped me, so I thought it was important.” Oliver smiled. “Let me get you home.”

  Merely mentioning the word made me frown. “What am I going to do?”

  “Worry about it tomorrow. For right now; get a good night’s rest, so you can start making plans. And stop frowning.” Dragging his thumb over my forehead, he chuckled softly. “Remember, you’re not alone. I’m sure we can get Molly and Blake to help with this. Four heads are always better than one.”

  Nodding, we walked back inside and stood by the elevator doors. “You’re right. This was the best place to celebrate.”

  “It can be one of ‘our places’.” He winked, lifting my hand to kiss the back of it.

  Entering the compartment, we travelled down to the ground level, exiting at the gift store. There was hardly one about, another sign that it was beyond late. Stifling a yawn, I was content being with Oliver again and wasn’t looking forward to saying goodnight when he dropped me off.

  We were almost outside when Oliver stopped in his tracks, his foot keeping the door open. “Wait right here, Liberty. I forgot something.” He didn’t say another word and, instead, left me alone while he returned from where we’d come.

  Five minutes later, he emerged from the building with a mischievous grin on his face. “Close your eyes for me and hold your hand out.” When I didn’t do it fast enough, he asked again. “And no peeking, either.”

  Laughing, I obeyed. Whatever the surprise was, it didn’t weigh much, fitting nicely in my palm. “Can I look now?”

  “Yes, you can.”

  It was a miniature statue of the Space Needle and I instantly knew I’d be adding it to my treasure box. “I love it!” Throwing my arms around his neck, I kissed his cheek, my fist tightly gripping my new keepsake. “It’s the perfect way to remember tonight!”

  “That’s why I got it for you. This way, if you ever doubt, it can remind you.”

  “I love you, Oliver. Thank you so much.” Letting him go, I didn’t take my gaze away from the sexy smile he was wearing.

  “Say that again.” There was a heated spark in his eyes.

  “I love you,” I repeated, my face flushing.

  “I love you, too.” He tugged on my arm, pulling me into his body. “Seeing you smile and laugh again . . . being able to do this . . .” He cupped the back of my head. “I’m never going to let you go.”

  “I’m not going anywhere. I know what I want.”

  “And what’s that?” The way he was staring at me turned my insides upside down. Anticipation built between us. Something magical was about to happen.

  “You.” It was all I could say as I struggled to catch my breath. I’d never get tired of the way I reacted to him.

  “Good answer.” He licked his lips, his other hand in my hair.

  “Can you please kiss me, Oliver?”

  “You don’t ever have to ask.”

  Standing under the light from the Space Needle, he gave me the most memorable of kisses to date. Even with the traffic sounds around us, evidence we weren’t the only people in the world, it was just him and me.

  In that moment, I knew with all my heart.

  The risk had definitely been worth it.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  I decided to not go into school, choosing to relax instead. After Oliver had dropped me home last night, it was difficult to sleep because my mind refused to switch off. Everything he’d said churned over and over, mixing with all the thoughts I’d suppressed over the years. I’d expected to be more freaked out, but since uncovering my inner source of strength, things didn’t seem so out of control. If anything, it was little exhilarating.

  I also spent most of the morning staring at the text message Oliver sent, grinning from ear to ear.

  Morning, beautiful. I’ll be over this afternoon.

  There was so much to talk about and plan. As the hours crept slowly by, I thought I’d jump out of my skin by the time I finally heard a knock at the door. I was eager to see him and more than ready to get out of the apartment. It had stopped feeling like my safe haven. Looking around, it resembled the prison that it really was.

  “Coming,” I called out happily. Skipping over to the door, I didn’t bother peeking through the peephole. The sooner Oliver was inside, the sooner I could kiss and tell him all my thoughts. “I’ve missed . . .”

  My sentence stopped short. It wasn’t Oliver. Slamming the door in Andrew’s face, it bounced of his foot, preventing me from closing it.

  “Missed me, huh? Good thing I stopped by, then.” He smirked, pushing on the surface to let himself in. “Where are your manners, Liberty?”

  There was no way I wanted him in the apartment. “I’m busy, Andrew. This isn’t a good time.” I shoved back, but he’d managed to get part way in, blocking my attempts. Judging by the determined scowl on his face, this wasn’t a social call.

  “Let me in.”

  I shook my head, almost buckling when he applied more force. I was no match for him, however. With one good shove, the door flew open, and I stumbled backward. Andrew chuckled low, quietly closing my only way out before facing me again.

  “Now, that was disappointing. I thought you’d be more grateful after everything I’ve done for you. Your mother would be horrified hearing how you treat honored guests in your home.” Andrew took a step toward me, shaking his head. “Shame on you.”

  “What do you want?” Not wanting him anywhere near me, I crossed over to the fireplace, keeping the sofa couch between us.

  “Why are you all the way over there? Don’t tell me you’re scared of me?” He had the audacity to sound surprised.

  “Stay where you are!” My arm shot out when he began walking toward me. “You need to leave. My parents will be here any second, and it won’t look good for them to find you here.” It was a lie, and he knew it.

  “Sweet, Liberty, such a lying tongue you have. I know for a fact they’re not. Your mother is shopping with Erica and I left your father at his office. I’m afraid it’s just you and me, my dear.” He started around the couch and I moved, not wanting to become trapped.

  “This isn’t appropriate. Please. You need to leave.” Panic filled my voice.

  “You’re hurting my feelings. All those times you flirted with me, acting like you wanted me . . . were you just pretending? Leading me on?” He was becoming angry, his voice becoming louder, more dynamic.

  “I never led you on!”

  “There’s a name for girls like you. Do you know what it is? A cock tease.” His lips curled into a menacing grimace as he paused mid-step. “You think you can toy with me and get away with it?”

  “I swear I didn’t. Please leave before I call the police.” Inching toward my bedroom door, my plan was to slip inside and barricade him out while calling for help. He must’ve realized it though, because he changed directions, forcing me the other way.

  “Quit playing games with me. We both know you want me. Is it because of Erica? I swear she doesn’t ever have to know. Now, come over here so we can finish what you started.” He pointed to the spot in front of him, demanding my obedience. “Don’t make me repeat myself. If I have to co
me to you, you’ll regret it.”

  I had no doubt. All pleasantries had fallen away, his disguise as the concerned future brother-in-law long gone. If Andrew managed to get his hands on me, it was all over. Fighting with everything in me, I hoped it would be enough.

  “You don’t want to do this. Think about it,” I reasoned. My back bumped into the corner wall. Triumph flashed in his eyes. He’d purposely been maneuvering me. The only way to escape him was to rush at him.

  “Don’t even think about it,” he warned.

  “You expect me to just let you rape me? I’ve never slept with anyone!” My body shook as adrenaline coursed through my veins. It was either fight or flight, and escaping wasn’t an option.

  “Rape is such an ugly word. Treat me with more respect and I’ll make this feel so good. I promise not to hurt you . . . much.” Andrew’s hand went to his belt buckle, pulling it undone. This was really going to happen. He was going to attack.

  I clenched my fists and started to scream.

  “No, you don’t,” he crooned, covering my mouth. “We’ll have none of that.”

  Biting on whatever flesh I could get between my teeth, he cussed loudly, releasing me.

  “You stupid bitch! I tried to be nice, but rough it is.” He slapped me hard across the face, toppling me backward. My head banged against the wall, temporarily dazing me, and I slid to the floor.

  “Please,” I pleaded, trying to ward him off.

  “Begging’s a nice touch, but not necessary.” Andrew reached down and grabbed at my leg. I kicked out, not wanting his filthy hands on me, and this time it was his fist that connected with my face. “You’ll like this and thank me afterward.”

  Pain exploded in my head. Before I could recover, he pummeled me again, causing me to slump to the side weakened. I’d never been struck before. My parents may have been controlling, but they’d drawn a line at being physically abusive. I wanted to curl up in a ball and protect myself, but I knew it wouldn’t help.

  Fight, my inner voice screamed. Fight, Liberty.

  Lashing out with my own fists, Andrew’s surprised grunts told me some had found their target. Screaming, I began scrambling toward the door and freedom. For a second, it seemed to work until I felt him flip me onto my back and cover me with his body. Pinning my arms above my head so I couldn’t strike him, Andrew began tearing at my clothes.