Yours and Mine

by Debbie Macomber

  Tanner’s brows drew together, forming a ledge over his narrowed eyes. “I’m not sure I do, either, but it seemed right. I don’t know what’s happening between us, Joanna, and it’s confusing the hell out of me.”

  “You? I’m the one who made it abundantly clear from the outset that I wasn’t looking for a romantic involvement.”

  “I know, and I agree, but—”

  “I’m more than pleased Kristen and Nicole are good friends, but I happen to like my life the way it is, thank you.”

  Tanner’s frown grew darker, his expression both baffled and annoyed. “I feel the same way. It was a kiss, not a suggestion we live in sin.”

  “I…really wish you hadn’t done that, Tanner.”

  “I apologise. Trust me, it won’t happen again,” he muttered, and buried his hands deep inside his pockets. “In fact it would probably be best if we forgot the entire incident.”

  “I agree totally.”

  “Fine then.” He stalked out of the kitchen, but not before Joanna found herself wondering if she could forget it.

  Six

  A kiss was really such a minor thing, Joanna mused, slowly rotating her pencil between her palms. She’d made a criminal case out of nothing, and embarrassed both Tanner and herself.

  “Joanna, have you had time to read over the Osborne loan application yet?” her boss, Robin Simpson asked, strolling up to her desk.

  “Ah, no, not yet,” Joanna said, her face flushing with guilt.

  Robin frowned as he studied her. “What’s been with you today? Every time I see you, you’re gazing at the wall with a faraway look in your eye.”

  “Nothing’s wrong.” Blindly she reached toward her In basket and grabbed a file, although she hadn’t a clue which one it was.

  “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were daydreaming about a man.”

  Joanna managed a short, sarcastic laugh meant to deny everything. “Men are the last thing on my mind,” she said flippantly. It was a half-truth. Men in the plural didn’t interest her, but man, as in Tanner Lund, well, that was another matter.

  Over the years Joanna had gone out of her way to avoid men she was attracted to—it was safer. She dated occasionally, but usually men who might be classified as pleasant, men for whom she could never feel anything beyond a mild friendship. Magnetism, charm and sex appeal were lost on her, thanks to a husband who’d possessed all three and systematically destroyed her faith in the possibility of a lasting relationship. At least, those qualities hadn’t piqued her interest again, until she met Tanner. Okay, so her dating habits for the past few years had been a bit premeditated, but everyone deserved a night out now and again. It didn’t seem fair to be denied the pleasure of a fun evening simply because she wasn’t in the market for another husband. So she’d dated, not a lot, but some and nothing in the past six years had affected her as much as those few short hours with Nicole’s father.

  “Joanna!”

  She jerked her head up to discover her boss still standing beside her desk. “Yes?”

  “The Osborne file.”

  She briefly closed her eyes in a futile effort to clear her thoughts. “What about it?”

  Robin glared at the ceiling and paused, as though pleading with the light fixture for patience. “Read it and get back to me before the end of the day—if that isn’t too much to ask?”

  “Sure,” she grumbled, wondering what had put Robin in such a foul mood. She picked up the loan application and was halfway through it before she realised the name on it wasn’t Osborne. Great! If her day continued like this, she could blame Tanner Lund for getting her fired.

  When Joanna arrived home three hours later she was exhausted and short-tempered. She hadn’t been herself all day, mainly because she’d been so preoccupied with thoughts of Tanner Lund and the way he’d kissed her. She was overreacting—she’d certainly been kissed before, so it shouldn’t be such a big deal. But it was. Her behaviour demonstrated all the maturity of someone Kristen’s age, she chided herself. She’d simply forgotten how to act with men; it was too long since she’d been involved with one. The day wasn’t a complete waste, however. She’d made a couple of important decisions in the last few hours, and she wanted to clear the air with her daughter before matters got completely out of hand.

  “Hi, honey.”

  “Hi.”

  Kristen’s gaze didn’t waver from the television screen where a talk-show host was interviewing a man—at least Joanna thought it was a man—whose brilliant red hair was so short on top it stuck straight up and so long in front it fell over his face, obliterating his left eye and part of his nose.

  “Who’s that?”

  Kristen gave a deep sigh of wonder and adolescent love. “You mean you don’t know? I’ve been in love with Simply Red for a whole year and you don’t even know the lead singer when you see him?”

  “No, I can’t say that I do.”

  “Oh, Mom, honestly, get with it.”

  There it was again. First she was losing it and now she was supposed to get with it. Joanna wished her daughter would decide which she wanted.

  “We need to talk.”

  Kristen reluctantly dragged her eyes away from her idol. “Mom, this is important. Can’t it wait?”

  Frustrated, Joanna sighed and muttered, “I suppose.”

  “Good.”

  Kristen had already tuned her out. Joanna strolled into the kitchen and realised she hadn’t taken the hamburger out of the freezer to thaw. Great. So much for the tacos she’d planned to make for dinner. She opened and closed cupboard doors, rummaging around for something interesting. A can of tuna fish wasn’t likely to meet with Kristen’s approval. One thing about her daughter that the approach of the teen years hadn’t disrupted was her healthy appetite.

  Joanna stuck her head around the corner. “How does tuna casserole sound for dinner?”

  Kristen didn’t even look in her direction, just held out her arm and jerked her thumb toward the carpet.

  “Soup and sandwiches?”

  Once more Kristen’s thumb headed downward, and Joanna groaned.

  “Bacon, lettuce and tomato on toast with chicken noodle soup,” she tried. “And that’s the best I can do. Take it or leave it.”

  Kristen sighed. “If that’s the final offer, I’ll take it. But I thought we were having tacos.”

  “We were. I forgot to take out the hamburger.”

  “All right, BLTs,” Kristen muttered, reversing the direction of her thumb.

  Joanna was frying the bacon when Kristen joined her, sitting on a stool while her mother worked. “You wanted to talk to me about something?”

  “Yes.” Joanna concentrated on spreading mayonnaise over slices of whole-wheat toast, as she made an effort to gather her scattered thoughts. She cast about for several moments, trying to come up with a way of saying what needed to be said without making more of it than necessary.

  “It must be something big,” Kristen commented. “Did my teacher phone you at work or something?”

  “No, should she have?” She raised her eyes and scrutinised Kristen’s face closely.

  Kristen gave a quick denial with a shake of her head. “No way. I’m a star pupil this year. Nicole and I are both doing great. Just wait until report-card time, then you’ll see.”

  “I believe you.” Kristen had been getting top marks all year, and Joanna was proud of how well her daughter was doing. “What I have to say concerns Nicole and—” she hesitated, swallowing tightly “—her father.”

  “Mr. Lund sure is good-looking, isn’t he?” Kristen said enthusiastically, watching for Joanna’s reaction.

  Reluctantly Joanna nodded, hoping to sound casual. “I suppose.”

  “Oh, come on, Mom, he’s a hunk.”

  “All right,” Joanna admitted slowly. “I’ll grant you that Tanner has a certain amount of…appeal.”

  Kristen grinned, looking pleased with herself.

  “Actually it was Mr. Lund I wanted
to talk to you about,” Joanna continued, placing a layer of tomato slices on the toast.

  “Really?” The brown eyes opened even wider.

  “Yes, well, I wanted to tell you that I…I don’t think it would be a good idea for the four of us to go on doing things together.”

  Abruptly Kristen’s face fell with surprise and disappointment. “Why not?”

  “Well…because he and I are both really busy.” Even to her own ears, the statement sounded illogical, but it was difficult to tell her own daughter that she was frightened of her attraction to the man. Difficult to explain why nothing could come of it.

  “Because you’re both busy? Come on, Mom, that doesn’t make any sense.”

  “All right, I’ll be honest.” She wondered whether an eleven-year-old could grasp the complexities of adult relationships. “I don’t want to give Nicole’s dad the wrong idea,” she said carefully.

  Kristen leaned forward, setting her elbows on the kitchen counter and resting her face in both hands. Her gaze looked sharp enough to shatter diamonds. “The wrong idea about what?” she asked.

  “Me,” Joanna said, swallowing uncomfortably.

  “You?” Kristen repeated thoughtfully, a frown creasing her smooth brow. She relaxed then and released a huge sigh. “Oh, I see. You think Mr. Lund might think you’re in the marriage market.”

  Joanna pointed a fork at her daughter. “Bingo!”

  “But, Mom, I think it would be great if you and Nicole’s dad got together. In fact, Nicole and I were talking about it just today. Think about all the advantages. We could all be a real family, and you could have more babies…I don’t know if I ever told you this, but I’d really like a baby brother, and so would Nicole. And if you married Mr. Lund we could take family vacations together. You wouldn’t have to work, because…I don’t know if you realise this, but Mr. Lund is pretty rich. You could stay home and bake cookies and sew and stuff.”

  Joanna was so surprised that it took her a minute to find her voice. Openmouthed, she waved the fork jerkily around. “No way, Kristen.” Joanna’s knees felt rubbery, and before she could slip to the floor, she slumped into a chair. All this time she’d assumed she was a good mother, giving her daughter everything she needed physically and emotionally, making up to Kristen as much as she could for her father’s absence. But she apparently hadn’t done enough. And Kristen and Nicole were scheming to get Joanna and Tanner together. As in married!

  Something had to be done.

  She decided to talk to Tanner, but an opportunity didn’t present itself until much later that evening when Kristen was in bed, asleep. At least Joanna hoped her daughter was asleep. She dialled his number and prayed Nicole wouldn’t answer.

  Thankfully she didn’t.

  “Tanner, it’s Joanna,” she whispered, cupping her hand over the mouthpiece, taking no chance that Kristen could overhear their conversation.

  “What’s the matter? Have you got laryngitis?”

  “No,” she returned hoarsely, straining her voice. “I don’t want Kristen to hear me talking to you.”

  “I see. Should I pretend you’re someone else so Nicole won’t tell on you?” he whispered back.

  “Please.” She didn’t appreciate the humor in his voice. Obviously he had yet to realise the seriousness of the situation. “We need to talk.”

  “We do?”

  “Trust me, Tanner. You have no idea what I just learned. The girls are planning on us getting married.”

  “Married?” he shouted.

  That, Joanna had known, would get a reaction out of him.

  “When do you want to meet?”

  “As soon as possible.” He still seemed to think she was joking, but she couldn’t blame him. If the situation were reversed, no doubt she would react the same way. “Kristen said something about the two of them swimming Wednesday night at the community pool. What if we meet at Denny’s for coffee after you drop Nicole off?”

  “What time?” He said it as though they were planning a reconnaissance mission deep into enemy territory.

  “Seven-ten.” That would give them both a few extra minutes to make it to the restaurant.

  “Shall we synchronise our watches?”

  “This isn’t funny, Tanner.”

  “I’m not laughing.”

  But he was, and Joanna was furious with him. “I’ll see you then.”

  “Seven-ten, Wednesday night at Denny’s,” he repeated. “I’ll be there.”

  * * *

  ON THE EVENING of their scheduled meeting, Joanna arrived at the restaurant before Tanner. She already regretted suggesting they meet at Denny’s, but it was too late to change that now. There were bound to be other customers who would recognise either Tanner or her, and Joanna feared that word of their meeting could somehow filter back to the girls. She’d been guilty of underestimating them before; she wouldn’t make the same mistake a second time. If Kristen and Nicole did hear about this private meeting, they’d consider it justification for further interference.

  Tanner strolled into the restaurant and glanced around. He didn’t seem to recognise Joanna, and she moved her sunglasses down her nose and gave him an abrupt wave.

  He took one look at her, and even from the other side of the room she could see he was struggling to hold in his laughter.

  “What’s with the scarf and sunglasses?”

  “I’m afraid someone might recognise us and tell the girls.” It made perfect sense to her, but obviously not to him. Joanna forgave him since he didn’t know the extent of the difficulties facing them.

  But all he said was, “I see.” He inserted his hands in the pockets of his overcoat and walked lazily past her, whistling. “Should I sit here or would you prefer the next booth?”

  “Don’t be silly.”

  “I’m not going to comment on that.”

  “For heaven’s sake,” Joanna hissed, “sit down before someone notices you.”

  “Someone notices me? Lady, you’re wearing sunglasses at night, in the dead of winter, and with that scarf tied around your chin you look like an immigrant fresh off the boat.”

  “Tanner,” she said, “this is not the time to crack jokes.”

  A smile lifted his features as he slid into the booth opposite her. He reached for a menu. “Are you hungry?”

  “No.” His attitude was beginning to annoy her. “I’m just having coffee.”

  “Nicole cooked dinner tonight, and frankly I’m starving.”

  When the waitress appeared he ordered a complete dinner. Joanna asked for coffee.

  “Okay, what’s up, Sherlock?” he asked, once the coffee had been poured.

  “To begin with I…I think Kristen and Nicole saw you kiss me the other night.”

  He made no comment, but his brow puckered slightly.

  “It seems the two of them have been talking, and from what I gather they’re interested in getting us, er, together.”

  “I see.”

  To Joanna’s dismay, Tanner didn’t seem to be the slightest bit concerned by her revelation.

  “That troubles you?”

  “Tanner,” she said, leaning toward him, “to quote my daughter, ‘Nicole and I have been talking and we thought it would be great if you and Mr. Lund got together. You could have more babies and we could go on vacations and be a real family and you could stay home and bake cookies and stuff.’” She waited for his reaction, but his face remained completely impassive.

  “What kind of cookies?” he asked finally.

  “Tanner, if you’re going to turn this into a joke, I’m leaving.” As far as Joanna was concerned, he deserved to be tormented by two dedicated eleven-year-old matchmakers! She started to slide out of the booth, but he stopped her with an upraised hand.

  “All right, I’m sorry.”

  He didn’t sound too contrite, and she gave a weak sigh of disgust. “You may consider this a joking matter, but I don’t.”

  “Joanna, we’re both mature adults,” he stat
ed calmly. “We aren’t going to let a couple of eleven-year-old girls manipulate us!”

  “Yes, but—”

  “From the first, we’ve been honest with each other. That isn’t going to change. You have no interest in remarriage—to me or anyone else—and I feel the same way. As long as we continue as we are now, the girls don’t have a prayer.”

  “It’s more than that,” Joanna said vehemently. “We need to look past their schemes to the root of the problem.”

  “Which is?”

  “Tanner, obviously we’re doing something wrong as single parents.”

  He frowned. “What makes you say that?”

  “Isn’t it obvious? Kristen, and it seems equally true for Nicole, wants a complete family. What Kristen is really saying is that she longs for a father. Nicole is telling you she’d like a mother.”

  The humour drained out of Tanner’s eyes, replaced with a look of real concern. “I see. And you think this all started because Kristen and Nicole saw us kissing?”

  “I don’t know,” she murmured, shaking her head. “But I do know my daughter, and when she wants something, she goes after it with the force of a bulldog and won’t let up. Once she’s got it in her head that you and I are destined for each other, it’s going to be pretty difficult for her to accept that all we’ll ever be is friends.”

  “Nicole can get that way about certain things,” he said thoughtfully.

  The waitress delivered his roast beef sandwich and refilled Joanna’s coffee cup.

  Maybe she’d overreacted to the situation, but she couldn’t help being worried. “I suppose you think I’m making more of a fuss about this than necessary,” she said, flustered and a little embarrassed.

  “About the girls manipulating us?”

  “No, about the fact that we’ve both tried so hard to be good single parents, and obviously we’re doing something wrong.”

  “I will admit that part concerns me.”

  “I don’t mind telling you, Tanner, I’ve been in a panic all week, wondering where I’ve failed. We’ve got to come to terms with this. Make some important decisions.”

  “What do you suggest?”