Shattered

by T. L. Reeve

  “Hey, Dad,” Riley called out from the staircase. “We’re starving. Can Abby and I have a snack before dinner?”

  He held up his finger and stood. “Sure, there’s still some of those cookies you and Charisma made the other night. Get you and Abby some and a glass of milk.”

  “Thank you, Daddy,” Riley answered as she ambled down the stairs.

  Aurora bit her bottom lip as she waited for the girl to go back up to her room. It shouldn’t have been this hard to tell him the truth. He deserved it, like she deserved an explanation on why he’d left so suddenly. When she spied Riley heading back toward her room, Mackenzie joined her again.

  “You were saying,” he said, sitting beside her.

  She took a deep breath and let it out. Rip the bandage off. It would have come out sooner or later. “Mac, I-I was a virgin. I-I tried to tell you when we were, you know, but it was happening so fast, and it felt so good I couldn’t-I didn’t-tell you the truth.”

  He frowned. “You’ve lost me here, Aurora. What’s going on?”

  She wanted to kick herself for being a bumbling fool. “I was a virgin, Mac.”

  He sat back, shock registering on his features then confusion. “I’m sorry. What?”

  “This is a long story.”

  “I’m all ears.” His gaze locked with hers. His irises were the cobalt blue she’d associated with the Raferty family, not the ice blue of his wolf. At least if she told him now, he’d remember.

  Aurora explained everything from the beginning. She told him about her sister, Abby’s mother, and she told him about her never finding the right moment to do the deed. “So, you see, you’re my first.”

  He sat there for a long time and didn’t say anything. She feared what he might say when he did find his voice. He glanced at her and ran his tongue over his bottom lip. “You’re telling me, I took your virginity, can’t remember it, and you’re also Abby’s aunt, not her mother?”

  “Yes. I know how this looks or-or sounds.”

  “You don’t know anything.” He chuckled; the sound filled with disbelief. “I don’t know if I should kick you out or hug you tight. I don’t know if I should hate you or love you.” He shook his head as he stood up. “It’s one thing to protect a little girl. It’s another thing to lie.”

  “I didn’t have a choice. When her sperm donor started acting like he’d take Abby away from me, even after he signed over his rights, I did what I had to do.”

  Mackenzie scrubbed his face, half pissed at himself and half angry at Aurora, even though he didn’t have a reason to be. However, the bite of deceit at the back of his mind, coupled with the images of Holly standing in his kitchen, crying about Hayden, being afraid of what might happen next... Then, the ten years he covered Holly while she plotted and schemed. How Holly wormed her way into his family to eventually try to rip it apart. “What do you get out of this little ‘arrangement?’”

  “Huh?” She stared up at him with a perplexed gaze. “Nothing, except for being poor, not having a life, and living for Abby. I came here because it was small. I could hide here. I came here because it’s dry and hot, something Abby needs with her condition. I came here because I couldn’t stand Washington anymore. I couldn’t stand being alone.” She stood then and got into his face, the best she could since she only came to his chest. “If I wanted you only for a soft bed and a hot-blooded wolf, I would’ve taken you up on your offer to move in with you. But, you, you stubborn, hardheaded, old man, I turned you down because I won’t be someone’s charity project.”

  “I didn’t ask you to move in with me.” Surely, he would have remembered if he had. Since he’d woken up naked in his bed while Royce pounded on his door, he’d been trying to put his day together. He recalled leaving the house, going to see Danielle, meeting the newest Raferty, and getting a call from Charles Franks. He recalled going to the county courthouse for a brief meeting where they’d been given new information about Nico and Hayden then, when he should have gone straight home because he had shit to take care of there, he started driving toward Aurora’s apartment. He snarled in frustration because the moment she opened the door wearing a sleep shirt and nothing else, he’d gone insane. The wolf sat up inside of him, nudging him to continue to remember what happened next. “We got into an argument.”

  “We did,” she answered. “About the shit quality of my place. You yelled at me about my mate not taking care of me.”

  He spied the fading mark at her neck. “You have a mate. What we did shouldn’t have happened.”

  “Shut up, Mackenzie Raferty.” She snorted shaking her head. “You marked me, Halloween night. You shifted into your wolf. You prowled toward me. You knocked me down and you licked me. L-licked the crotch of my jeans then you-you buried your snout in the crook of my neck and nipped me. Then for the past three weeks, you’ve come to my house on my nights off and stalked the place. If I didn’t know any better, which I don’t, I’d swear you were marking your damn territory.” She pointed at him, waggling her finger. “Did you know I lied to Logan to cover your ass, because he thought you were a stray, or worse, a rogue wolf? If I hadn’t been there, he’d have shot your ass.”

  “Might have been for the best,” he muttered.

  “Maybe,” she snapped. “For you.”

  “I still don’t understand what all this has to do with me?”

  “You’re my mate, dumbass!” she said in a biting tone.

  Shock jolted him. He’d shifted. Danielle had told him such. He’d even told her to burn the clothes he’d been wearing. A fear reaction, of sorts or at least what he’d been willing to admit. His wolf had been dormant for more years than he could count. A phenomenon that happened usually with a wolf who didn’t know what he was. The only difference between him and them, was the fact those wolves never birthed wolves or shifters of any type. If they did, it was genetically rare. So, for Mackenzie to go dormant for so many years was unheard of, yet, he was.

  “Fuck.” He sat down on the couch hard. “Does anyone know?” Stupid question of course, everyone knew, and they were trying to push Aurora and him together.

  “Which part? The part where I’m a virgin or the part where I’m your mate?” She narrowed her eyes at him and crossed her arms.

  “Me being your mate,” he answered. If he felt anything, he couldn’t describe it. Mostly, he was neutral.

  “No. I slept up until it was time to go get Abby,” she answered.

  “Then you haven’t.” He sighed. “Aurora, I can’t be a mate. I...” He shook his head. “I’m not good at this.”

  “‘Not good at this?’” She snorted. “I’m not even sure what ‘this’ is. I don’t even get the shifter lingo, other than mates are a thing.”

  “Shit. We’re messed up.” He gave a self-deprecated chuckle.

  “You more than me,” she snarked.

  “I can’t disagree with you.” Mackenzie stared at her for a moment. “What do you say to something between friendship and mating?”

  She stared at him. “I’m not sure.” She rubbed her arms and tucked her bottom lip between her teeth. “I feel like I’m forcing a situation. I don’t think you want this. Am I wrong?”

  No, she wasn’t. He couldn’t think clearly. Between the trial and his wolf and now this? His life was a steaming pile of shit, but at least if they were friends with benefits, or whatever the younger generation called it, he could have her in his life and still not have to fully claim her. With his reputation, she should have been happy with that agreement. Yet, as he sat there with her, it didn’t feel right. His wolf once more turned his back on him, blocking all of Mackenzie’s senses. He couldn’t smell her. He couldn’t scent her truths and lies.

  He was flying solo.

  “There are some things an old wolf like me doesn’t get a third chance at. Strike that, I shouldn’t be able to have another chance to make this type of relationship a go. I’ve failed at everything. The paths I’ve taken have led to ruin and, this last time, it too
k more of my family with it.” Not to mention involved two innocent pups.

  “So, are you saying you’d ruin me or vice versa?” She tilted her head to the side. “Because, I’ve got to tell you, you already have.”

  He grunted. “Sex doesn’t ruin anyone. It’s what comes afterwards that can.”

  “Give me until the weekend then,” she said. “I have to think about all of this and weigh my options, especially if someone else wants to take their chances with me.”

  The beast inside Mackenzie roared to life, snarling and spitting as he lunged, pushing against the surface of his skin. His flesh rippled, and the short hairs on his arms stood on end.

  No.

  The wolf didn’t like the idea of her finding anyone else. She belonged to him and come hell or high water; the wolf would have her. “Sounds like a plan.”

  “Fine, then I should go,” she murmured. “Thanks for clearing some things up. Also, I’m not on birth control—no reason to be. I’ll keep you posted, should I end up, you know. Pregnant.”

  Again, another bolt of regret and shock shot through him. “If it’s all the same, you should be fine. I wouldn’t worry too much about it.”

  “You’re not the one who carries a baby for nine months. I would be. I’ll tell you when I’m concerned.” Anger burned in her blue eyes. He’d rather her be pissed at him than crying, he supposed.

  “You’re absolutely right.” Mackenzie held up his hands. “If you’re worried, Danielle will help you.”

  “I’m not. But still, if I was, I would have gone straight to her. Not come here with Abby.” She stood then. “We should go.”

  “Stay,” he said. “Charisma made dinner. Abby enjoys being here. No reason pulling the girls apart now. After dinner, you can go if you want, or—” he closed his eyes. “Or, you can stay here with us for the evening.”

  “Mac, I—”

  “I swear, no hanky-panky. Honest. You can sleep with Abby in her room. Or, I can have Abby bunk down with Riley, and you can have Abby’s room. It’s up to you.”

  She blew out a breath. “Now I understand why Keeley and Danielle say Raferty men are so exhausting. Your highs and lows are more like tsunamis than ebbs and flows.”

  He gave a weak laugh. “Yeah, we run hot and cold.”

  “It’s not a good thing, Mackenzie Raferty.”

  “Wasn’t saying it was,” he replied.

  Aurora sat on the couch and closed her eyes. “I can’t believe how my day has gone.”

  Neither could he. “If you need a nap or anything, you can rest in Abby’s room.”

  She shook her head. “Can’t sleep. If I nap now, I won’t sleep later. My body was prepared for work tonight. Not the day off.”

  Mackenzie nodded. “Fine, I’ll—”

  A knock at the door drew his attention. No one came to his house, especially at that time of the day. If anyone needed him, they knew to come in the morning or later in the evening after the kids had settled in for the night. He went to the door and opened it, taking a step back. Hayden stood on his porch with Emmeline in her arms.

  “Hi,” Hayden said. “I’m the rally person for tonight.”

  Mackenzie stepped to the side to allow them entrance. “‘Rally person’?”

  His niece nodded. “Yep. It’s time for dinner at Kalkin’s, then we’re headed to the school for the Thanksgiving play.”

  “Shit, that’s today?” Aurora groaned. “I totally spaced out. No wonder why Kalkin gave me the night off.”

  Hayden laughed. “Yep. All of us got the day off.”

  “I’ll gather up the kids,” Mackenzie said. “Does Abby need her costume or anything?”

  Aurora shook her head. “No, it’s at the schoolhouse.”

  “I should also tell you, we have a couple of late arrivals,” Hayden added. “Kalkin was on his way to the airport when caught me with Emmeline. He should be back within the hour.”

  “Couple of late arrivals?” Mackenzie cocked a brow. “Who?”

  “Charisma and Penny Ann’s dad and a guest. He wouldn’t say who it is or anything. Just a plus-one type deal.”

  “Huh, interesting,” Mackenzie muttered.

  “You’re acting like her father doesn’t see her very often,” Aurora said.

  “He doesn’t,” Mackenzie answered. “I’ve only met the guy twice. Once when Charisma’s home was firebombed and once when Charisma gave birth to the twins. He’s a senator, so he spends most of his time in Washington D.C.”

  “Whoa. Where’s their mother?” she hedged.

  “She passed away a long time ago,” Hayden replied. “She had cancer. It’s not something Charisma or Penny Ann talk about, and I can’t blame them.”

  “I’m so sorry,” Aurora murmured. “I understand how it feels to lose a parent.”

  Hayden joined Aurora on the couch, allowing Mackenzie a quick escape to gather the kids. “Would you like to meet my—our, mine and Nico’s new daughter? This is Emmeline.”

  “It’s lovely to meet you, Emmeline.”

  Mackenzie crested the stairs as Aurora greeted the young mountain lion. He went to Liam’s room first and knocked. When the boy answered, he appeared flustered and out of sorts. The top button on his jeans was open and his cheeks were red. “Bad timing.” Mackenzie tried to play it off. “I understand, son. This is also my fault. I forgot about tonight. Kalkin sent Hayden over to retrieve us, it’s family dinner night before the play.”

  Liam snarled. “Damn it.”

  “It’s a pain in the ass, but it’s for a good cause. Your little cousin is in the play. So is Abby. It would be rude of us to miss it.”

  Liam frowned. “Fine. Give me five minutes.”

  “Five it is. I’m going to get Riley and Abby ready. Meet us downstairs when you’ve taken care of your issues.”

  “Dad,” Liam whined.

  “What? I didn’t say it. I told you, I’ll give you all the space you need. You know where I keep everything in my room should you need it. This is my way of saying, you’re safe here.” He scrubbed his son’s head. “Five minutes.”

  “I’ll be ready.” His son dropped his head as he trudged back into his room, closing the door behind him.

  In a few days, Liam would be making his first trip of many to the orphanage for the full moon. Mackenzie had thought he had time to prepare his son for what was about to come, it appeared he was out of time. This, this right here is why you don’t need a mate at the moment. Your children need you more than ever, Liam especially.

  He knocked on the door to Riley’s room, and her giggle of happiness pushed back the despair. His daughter opened the door with a flourish and waved him inside. “Welcome to the royal castle. Are you here to see the princess?”

  “I am,” he answered, stepping into her room. Abby sat on Riley’s bed, wearing a crown and dress from Riley’s old dress-up chest he’d bought her several Christmases before. “Ah, Princess Abigail. It’s good to see you again.”

  The little girl giggled and held out her hand. Mackenzie knelt before her, and he brushed his lips over her knuckles. “It’s good to see you, too, knight.”

  “We have been requested for dinner. You have a play in which you must attend m’lady.”

  “Oh!” Abby gasped. “I love plays. Will Mumsy be joining us?”

  “Yes. We should hurry. Can’t keep your royal subjects waiting.” He stood then. “I gave Liam five minutes, and I’ll give you the same. Hayden’s here with a new family member, so I want you on your best behaviors.”

  Abby and Riley nodded. “We will be dad. Come on, Abby, let’s get you ready to go.”

  “Okay.” The little girl hopped off the bed with a laugh as she pulled off her crown. “Being a princess is fun.”

  Mackenzie continued on to his room. He could wear his grubby jeans and t-shirts around the house all he wanted, but going to an event, he should at least look presentable. Once he was in his room, he grabbed his best pair of pants out of the closet along with a button-d
own shirt he reserved for when he went on bids with Rapier. When he was dressed, he went back downstairs and found all of the children along with Hayden, Emmeline, and Aurora waiting on him.

  “We’ll take my truck since it has more room,” Mackenzie said. “It might be time for you to upgrade vehicles.”

  Hayden laughed. “We’re already in the process. We’ll see you at the property.”

  On the drive over, he thought about everything Aurora and he had discussed. It still blew his mind, and it also worried him even more. The gaps in time was his wolf, he didn’t doubt it for a second, however the fear of going feral still sat at the back of him mind. The ‘what if,’ was a constant niggle of contention for him. It was why he couldn’t give her what Aurora deserved, yet he also couldn’t say no to her, either.

  “Like I said before, you should stay with us tonight. Between the dinner and the play, you’re going to be exhausted.”

  Aurora cut her gaze to him. “I think Abby and I should go home. I’m tired as it is, and staying might lead to other things.”

  Other things meant one of two possible scenarios. Either they’d end up having sex again, which his wolf was onboard with, or he’d end up losing time. “True. Or we could both crash, wake up the next morning, and act normal.”

  She laughed. “Something tells me, we’ll never be normal.”

  No, they wouldn’t. “I’d very much like you to stay and to join us for Thanksgiving dinner, too.”

  “Mac—”

  “Listen, it’s always a huge thing my brother does for our joined families,” he said. “I am sure he’ll invite you, anyway. It’ll give us time to figure out how this is going to work. Plus, you and Abby can be with us instead of being alone.”

  She stared at him for longer than he expected her to. “Fine. We’ll go. But, if anything like Halloween happens, I’m locking myself in a room, and you won’t find me.”

  Mackenzie laughed. “I’d always find you, Aurora. Even if I’m not sure I should be a mate or have the chance to be one, you’re mine. We’ll just have to figure this out together.”