Gabriel

by Melissa Meintjes

  As Gabriel Hatfield arrived home after sitting in traffic for forty minutes, he felt relieved to be safe from public accusations. He took off his scrubs and looked at his nude body in the mirror, and as he analyzed his slender chest, and the tiny amount of hair on it, he felt in love and happy. He put on some black pants and a purple t shirt. He then went to his kitchen and made some vegan Asian stir-fry. As he ate dinner, he thought about how he did not want to watch television because it numbed the brain to thought, and so he thought about Facebook and how eager he felt to experience it. On Facebook he could look at all the men he secretly coveted. He could look at all the photos of homosexuals who celebrated themselves and sex online. With a click of a button he could talk to everyone he loved, and enter groups that inspired him; made him feel like he belonged despite all the years of abuse. Facebook in a way had made him feel more normal, and therefore with great enthusiasm after dinner and cleaning the kitchen, he switched on his computer and went to Facebook.

  Gabriel Hatfield’s Facebook account consisted of countless photos of himself. Some were partially nude, some were disfigured, some were of his hair only, some of his face from above, some of just his eyes, some of his silhouette, some of his buttocks, and a few of him with friends. He loved Facebook for allowing his artistic qualities to shine. He clicked through all his photos and felt enamored with the beauty they possessed. Whether, partially nude, shadowy, up-close, or of different body parts; his photos spoke of perfection and as he watched himself on the little screen in front of him, he felt all his pride from the day become restored. He felt whole again, but the word “faggot” still seemed to reverberate in his mind and therefore he decided to make fun of his enemies by embracing it. How could anyone think that a word that means him, to be synonymous with low and wrong. So he decided to show the world through his photos, how glorious the word “faggot” really was. So he stripped nude, and wrapped a white cloth around his private regions, fastened them with golden tassels, an outfit he had ordered online from a gay pornography store. Then he began to photograph himself. He did not like the way the photos came out, and so he called Carl to help him, by photographing him. Carl came over in half an hour and photographed Gabriel various times, using a digital camera. Through the photographs, Gabriel, noticed a beam of light coming in through the window, and so he decided to play around with it by posing under it. He opened up his big mouth a little bit and pretended to drink the light, and Carl snapped the photo. He then looked in to the light and Carl snapped another photo. Eventually Carl snapped several photos, because he could not control the impulse. So even when there was no pose, a photo was snapped. Although some looked lower quality, Gabriel put them all up on Facebook. With his nude chest exposed, the light infiltrated in to his mouth, as if he were on Mount Olympus drinking from a special light fountain. In another photo, his eyes looked illuminated even more by the ray of light. In all the photos, Gabriel appeared incredible for his beauty seemed to love the camera. The light had emphasized ever so beautifully the different features of Gabriel, that Carl became filled with awe and then kissed him.

  Once the photos had been placed up, Gabriel wrote “faggot” next to one of them.

  Then Carl asked, “why are you humiliating yourself?”

  To which Gabriel responded “I am not humiliating myself. If you think so get out.”

  Then Carl apologized by saying “I am sorry. I guess you have masochistic urges.”

  Then Gabriel slapped Carl, and yelled “how could you think that?” As Carl got up to walk out the door, Gabriel yelled “stop! I am sorry! I just had a rough day and I wanted to celebrate myself.”

  “You are not a faggot.” Carl replied.

  “We are both faggots, but we should both be proud.” Gabriel responded.

  Then Carl walked back and hugged him. Gabriel then offered him something to eat, and as Carl ate they watched television together. So they decided to watch a movie about a woman that steals a couple’s baby. After the movie ended, they went to bed together, gave each other oral sex and fell asleep knowing that they loved the taste of cum even though it tasted bitter.

  Chapter 9

  After Dorothy Clever got off the phone with her employer she repeated the name, Celia Rose and loved the way it rolled off her tongue. So she decided to call herself Celia all the time. She imagined the things she would do and grew excited with the concept of being nude and displayed. She then investigated the Dungeon pornography site, and realized she might feel very humiliated after the shots. She then calmed herself down with the thought of buying new heels and having money. She loved money. Since she was a small child she had been very poor. Sleeping on dirty mattresses on the floor, and living in trailer parks. She often felt very low because of her poverty, knowing that others could buy everything while she could buy nothing other than the essentials for survival. She had often cried because of her poverty and felt jealous of girls who could wear expensive clothes. Her mother Meredith would say “materials are not what matter, for the heart is eternal while materials fade.” Although she appreciated the sentiment, she did not believe her mother, and believed no god would be so unjust as to make her poor. Therefore she did not believe in eternal hearts. So she would respond to her mother by saying “I do not believe you.” Then her mother would respond “why?” Then Celia responded I just do not think that God is fair. Then her mother would say:

  there is an old story that goes as follows: there once was a girl without a lot of shoes who wanted the most expensive shoes, and so she would stand outside a shop window staring at what she could not have. Then came another girl without any shoes who stared at the girl with shoes and wanted those. Then came a girl who could not walk and instead of walking, rolled by in a wheel chair. The girl then stopped and began to stare at the girl without any shoes, for her feet were the most precious feet in the universe to the girl in the wheel chair for they worked so well, even without shoes. You see daughter, god knows what we need. People always want more, forgetting, to be thankful for what they have.”

  Celia felt terrible, about her exuberant desires at the time and grew humble of heart the way her mother had desired. Then when she was in high school, her mother became ill from lung cancer and no doctor helped her for their poverty could not afford them. They had no medical insurance, and as a result, her mother died. No country singer who sang about pride and country would help, no Christian preacher did anything. Celia had to move in with her grandmother and everyday thought about the value of money, learning from her tragedy to place it above anything else.

  After high school she could not serve in the army because she was diabetic, and required insulin to live. She then decided to try to become a model, and realized that the sadistic culture of ultra-thinness and height, made her feel too inadequate and likely to fail. So she accepted her role as a stripper, and coffee girl at a local Starbucks. She prayed every day that something better would happen. That unlike her mother she would have medical insurance. Then Maria, a friend stripper, one day, gave her the name of the Dungeon, and although it went against her beliefs about morality, Celia saw another morality; the morality of survival and therefore submitted to whatever her bosses wanted. So that night she shaved her vagina more the way her bosses had ordered her to.

  In a week from Celia’s initial interview, she received a call to come in and pose naked, for a pornography shot, at seven pm before she had to go to the strip club. They did not tell her what it would be about, and so she asked. They then responded “why? Do you have a problem doing something?” “No.” She said. “I was just wondering” she continued. Then they responded “be here at seven or else. We should not have to explain everything to you.” They then hung up. She felt very chastised and degraded but happy about her employment. So she went to work at Starbucks as usual, and then at seven pm, went to the Dungeon in down town Los Angeles. When she arrived the security guard asked her for identification and when she did not have any, said “you cannot enter.” She then said
“I have an appointment, and I am new.” Then the big black security guard escorted her in to the building and to the little office at the end of the corridor. The same man as before greeted her, and shook her hand. He then gave her an identification card and said she needed it to enter. Then she asked “where do I have to go. I don’t want to be late.” Then he took her up to the third floor, and showed her in to a big room with ropes and metal devices. The bald man from the previous photo shoot presented himself and told her to get undressed after greeting her. She undressed and placed her clothes in the corner of the room. Then another man dressed in black, wearing a black mask, tied her up in such a manner that she stood with her rear and chest pushed out, and her arms extended out, and her legs slightly apart. He then stood behind her with a big dildo on a stick and stuck it up her anus on the command of the photographer. Celia screamed several times, and waited for them to photograph her. The photos came focusing in on her face, her buttocks, her shaved vagina, and her anus, as the dildo went inside. She started getting excited and therefore her vagina became moist. Then the dildo penetrated her vagina and rubbed her clitoris gently. Her body began to quiver from the excitement and the joy and then she moaned and screamed as she came to orgasm. Then the man in the mask gave her light frisky slaps on the buttocks and hit her with a light whip, and then a paddle. He then placed a ball gag in her mouth. Then they took several photos. After she had come to orgasm they released her from her bonds, and allowed her to get dressed. They then wrote a note, on yellow colored paper about how much to pay her. The bald man then said “give this to Ralph, and he will pay you. He is the man who brought you here.” Then she got dressed, and walked to the little office where she had met Ralph and showed him the paper. They then paid her fourteen thousand dollars, as Maria had told her they would. Then she walked home and felt happy to be wealthier.

  That night after dancing nude most of the evening, Celia lay in bed wondering who the masked man had been. The intrigue made her want him more. She imagined a beautiful gentleman with big blue green eyes, a gently arched nose, and dark hair. She imagined her prince charming and then grew excited again. She imagined herself nude in front of him and rubbed herself until she came to orgasm and then fell asleep.

  A week later, Celia, again received a phone call, asking her to come in for a shoot. She arrived as usual, on time, and this time walked in with her identification card. Ralph escorted her to a little room on the second floor. Once in the room she realized it looked like a doctor’s office. Ralph told her to get undressed and wait until the bald man arrived. Once he arrived Ralph left. The photographer waited until another woman arrived and then he told them to stand talking to one another, nude. Clint then told Celia to bend over the table and wait for a rectal exam. Then Clint told the other woman to put on a nurse’s outfit and examine Celia’s anus and vaginal canal. Celia felt mortified by the stranger investigating her up close and so intimately. Then the nurse woman with her long black hair and glasses on, walked to a cabinet and took out a thermometer, and stuck it in to the anus of Celia. She then waited to measure her temperature. Clint snapped shots. The brunette then applied cream to the back and buttocks of Celia, and Celia greatly enjoyed the deep tissue massage. Clint then told Celia to get on the table, on her back, and spread her legs. The woman wearing the nurse outfit then began to rub the ointment on Celia’s vagina. Her vagina began to release white fluid and then she began to feel the waves of pleasure throughout her body. The nurse then began to strip naked, and got completely nude, only wearing her heels. She then placed a dildo on, and stuck it in to Celia. Then Celia was told by Clint to turn around and bend over and get spanked by the nurse in front of the camera. During all the events, Clint took photographs from every angle. After the spanking, they gave her a yellow paper and told her to get dressed. The yellow paper, had written on it: ten thousand dollars. Celia left sexually excited and happy.

  Two weeks later, Celia again received a phone call telling her to come at seven pm to the studio called the Dungeon. Once she arrived they escorted her to a little room with buckets of water and a dildo sticking out of the wall. They then told her to get on the dildo, and she felt a bed of tiny prickles, prickle her buttocks. They were blunt needles, so they did not penetrate her skin, but rather only gave her mild discomfort and a sense of severe punishment. They then attached a big collar to her neck and linked it to the wall. Clint and the masked man, then attached restraints to her wrists and hooked them to the wall; spread apart and downwards. They then snapped photos of her and then preceded to put a fishnet stocking over her head and wrap her face in it. The masked man then began to hit her with a small whip as the photographs flashed. The whips did not hurt Celia, as much as the public humiliation of having her body exposed and her face covered. She had always felt her face to be superior to that of others. So when they covered it up, she felt the humiliation much more profoundly. The dildo began to move, and as she came to orgasm the camera captured her body tense up, held up mostly by a dildo.

  Chapter 10

  After having posted a variety of pictures on his Facebook account, Gabriel Strife decided to read and then go to sleep.

  As he read, he found out that he greatly enjoyed reading about sex in books, and as he read the romance novel, that he had bought, he remembered Joseline Cake, and how much he had enjoyed her. He thought how silly he had been for having been angry with Sarah, but felt grateful for his silliness. He wondered what the life of Joseline Cake must be like and felt sorry for her ability to not care about her public exposure. He thought she must have been through a lot of bad experiences in life that allowed her to do what she did. He wondered if she had been raped as a child, or had become a drug addict who desperately needed more money to feed her drug addiction. He wondered if in the pornography industry there were pimps, and then became slightly aroused over the imagination of being her pimp. As his body craved her, he decided to look at her online. So he decided to look her up in the index of the Dungeon site. As he looked, he noticed Celia Rose, the fairest woman he had ever seen, and found her tied up nude. He admired her rounded butt cheeks and the way he could see every detail of her vagina and anus. Then he went on to the next picture in which a man started whipping her with a little whip. As the pictures continued, her buttocks became redder and redder like the inside of watermelons; and although his erection grew, he felt sorry for her. So he decided to close his eyes, and lie down on his bed so that he could imagine fornicating with her.

  He unbuttoned his pants and rolled them down. As he felt the cold sheet against his rear, he rubbed his long love stem, and imagined her sitting on top of it instead of on the floor. He imagined her beautiful face, with its slender pixie nose, green eyes, and pale complexion. Her rose like lips and hair complimented each other naturally; and as he came to orgasm he imagined her lose it on top of him and also come to orgasm. He then felt satisfied and filled with sleep. He would have slept, but the guilt and excitement of feeling like he had cheated on Sarah, made him have energy to call his girlfriend.

  Gabriel called Sarah as she was busy painting her nails a light pink. She had her feet up on her bed painting them. He then asked her if she had gone on Facebook, and waited for her response full of anticipation for her jealousy. She then replied “no.” He then said “You should go. I changed some things.” Then she asked “what things?” “I just put some more pictures up,” he responded. “What pictures?” She asked. “Pictures of some of my favorite actresses.” Then she giggled and asked “trying to make me jealous are you?” Then he responded “no! Are you?” Then she said “No, liking the opposite sex is natural. What do you think?” Then he responded “yes. I especially love you.” She did not say anything back and then began to discuss her school work. He did not suspect jealousy, the way he had hoped. She seemed always very busy with school and believed, as a result, she felt a lot of stress. After a few minutes they said goodnight, and hung up.

  Although Gabriel seemed satisfied and happy, he fel
t bothered by Sarah’s lack of jealousy and his ever increasing agony over it. So he decided to try and feel ok about her feelings of admiring other men, and so put on the television and tried to pretend that everything was ok. Although he watched the television and watched an old episode of “Friends,” he could not forget Sarah’s coldness over the phone, and imagined her liking some boy in the dormitory instead of him. He felt terrible. He imagined the boy taller, better looking and perhaps more successful. As a result, he became depressed and decided to drink some wine, and eat something to take his mind off the sadness. He felt tempted to hate her, but could not, for he felt equally guilty for having been a bad boyfriend, through his lust and liking of Celia Rose, and his desire for vengeance. So instead of feeling special in his relationship to Sarah he felt ordinary, and as a result wished he had another woman. After having eaten something he lay in bed, and as he lay in bed, he imagined, Sarah’s beautiful face, flawless skin, and perfect smile. He imagined the round curves of her soft shape, and realized he could never be with another woman, but felt too foolish to take off the photos of the other women from his website. So instead, he accepted life as the ordinariness it made him feel and felt relieved to possess such a beautiful girl friend as Sarah.

  Chapter 11

  Although, Natasha, had not dated much because of her massive load of school work, she felt happy because she often thought about a man she had dated in Italy. His name had been Massimiliano Ferrone and he had been part owner and waiter in a restaurant called the Caravaggio. Caravaggio had been called so after the famous artist, who had lived in Italy during the late fifteen hundreds and had painted various life like paintings. One of his paintings, which depicted a woman caressing a man’s hand, hung in the restaurant, so all could watch while they ate. The restaurant served traditional Southern Italian food, and embodied beauty and elegance.