Cross My Heart

by Jaime Russell

  “Hi. Karen said that you were off today, so I was just stopping in to drop off some of the garden veggies that I picked to make for your dinner tonight.”

  “I thought we were having dinner tonight,” Rhett says, seeming as confused as am I.

  “I didn’t know because you seemed busy with your phone call.” He quickly has a guilty look on his face.

  “Oh, how about this weekend? I’ll take you on a proper date. When are you moving stuff in?”

  “We’re starting tonight, and then leaving the moving truck here to make it easier to unload. That way it won’t take up space at the hotel because we’re still paying for the truck.” I try to sound hopeful, but my heart and words don’t match up.

  “Sounds good, baby. I’ll call you later, okay?” he says, looking at me, so I nod but not feeling like I believe he’s really going to be calling me. Something has shifted.

  I start to walk out to the mess hall, and I feel a hand on my elbow. I turn around, and I’m met with his lips. He kisses me with the same tenderness he did last night, and I melt into his arms. I know I should, but I don’t make him stop. I actually want him to take me to his room, so we can spend the rest of the day making love. What in the hell is wrong with me? I know deep in my heart that something is up.

  “I know that we’re learning about each other, but please just trust me. There isn’t a girlfriend or a wife I’m hiding. There’s just some personal shit that I need to figure out, before I can talk to you about it.”

  “Okay,” I try to sound believable, but I don’t even believe myself.

  “Besides, you’re my girl and I don’t want anyone else.” I smile a little at his words. Looking into his eyes, I feel it in my heart that what he’s saying is true, but my head is another story. He kisses me one more time before walking away.

  I try to throw myself into cooking lunch and talking with the workers, but my mind is somewhere else. After I’m finished up, I head to my office for a while. I’m staring off into space, when my phone rings and I see Marcy flashing on my screen.

  “Hey. What time are you done?”

  “I’m done about five.” I give her the address, as I tell her that I’m exhausted, so no trying to mess around with the guys tonight. She starts to question me, but I tell her that I have to go.

  “Karen, are you staying for dinner?” I ask over the walkie.

  “Yes, I will be. What are we having that’s good?” she asks.

  “It’s a surprise.” I laugh, as I head into the house to start cooking lasagna. I finish making dinner, and Tucker and Wes come in looking completely exhausted.

  “Oh, that smells amazing, Charlie.”

  “Thanks, Tuck. There is fresh salad in the fridge, an apple pie on the counter, and the lasagna is sitting in the oven already cut,” I say, starting to gather up my stuff.

  “You’re not staying?” I shake my head no. “You okay?” I go to open my mouth, as Rhett comes in the house, slamming the door.

  “It was great meeting you too, Emma. I can’t wait to see you again.” He laughs. “Tomorrow, it’s a date.” He comes to stand in the doorway to the kitchen, and our eyes connect, but neither of us move from where we are standing. There is just an awkward silence. After a bit, he goes upstairs still talking to this Emma woman.

  “Marcy’s out front. I’ll see you guys tomorrow. Enjoy the food,” I say, as I hug them both, and race out of the house with tears rolling down my face.

  Stupid me. I should’ve known better about Rhett.

  Rhett

  I can’t believe Katy told me not to tell anyone, but she has already run her fucking mouth to her dad. He just had to be at that meeting. I sit on my bed, as my finger hovers over Quinn’s name. I hit the green call button, and she answers on the third ring.

  “Hey, Rhett. What’s up?”

  “Are you still able to practice law in Texas?” I ask her, as I pace my bedroom.

  “Yeah, why? What did Tucker do now?” She laughs.

  “It’s for me.” I sigh. “I ran into an old friend last night, and I’m a father.”

  “I’m sorry, you’re what?” I tell her the story of Katy and Emma, plus the role her father played in all of it. “Quinnie, she told me not to tell anyone, and I really hate lying to Charlie.”

  “Charlie, the girl from here?” I start laughing. I forgot it’s been a little bit, since we talked to each other. “Wow, your dream girl is your new chef. Don’t keep her in the dark too long.”

  “If I want to get to know Emma, it’s all on her terms, because of her father. He’s still pulling the strings, so I need some legal advice. Do you have someone here that can help with the filing and the paperwork until we get a court date?” I ask.

  “Let me check to see if a friend of mine is available. I can’t believe she lied to you all these years about having a kid. They shouldn’t be pulling the damn strings. You need to tell your brothers and your girlfriend.”

  “Yeah but what do I do?” I look out the window, seeing Charlie getting into the car with one of the girls, but I’m not sure who it is, because at this angle I can’t see. “Until we can get into court, you’re going to have to follow her rules. This not telling Charlie though is kind of bullshit. I understand her not wanting you to introduce her to Emma, because she isn’t your wife, but you need to establish a relationship first, before anyone meets her, including tweedle dee and tweedle dumb.”

  “Okay. I’m going to go talk to Charlie about it. I don’t want her to think that there’s someone else. I didn’t realize that she was still at the house, and I came inside, talking to Emma.”

  “Fix it, before it festers.” Quinn and I talk for a couple more minutes, before hanging up. I get out of the stupid dress clothes that I wore- the black dress pants, blue dress shirt, and even the tie I thought would impress her.

  Katy: Emma is looking forward to spending time with you, but I’ll be in the restaurant.

  Me: Don’t trust me?

  Katy: I don’t trust anyone, when it comes to my daughter.

  Me: OUR daughter.

  Me: Oh, and next time we discuss Emma, your father won’t be present. It’s between you and me.

  Katy: I can’t do that. I don’t know how your temper is these days.

  Me: Katy, I want to do what’s right for Emma. You and I are never going to be anything more than co-parents.

  I put on basketball shorts and a t-shirt, and then jog down the stairs, as I hear Tucker talking to someone on speakerphone.

  “I don’t give a fuck. Charlie isn’t working tomorrow.” Maddie’s voice is loud and pissed off.

  “Hey, don’t get pissy with me, but she needs to be here. I’ll keep my dipshit of a brother away from her.”

  “I can’t believe that he’s dating Charlie and some Emma and Katy. I have a sister who won’t stop crying.”

  I made her cry? Tucker apologizes to Maddie and tells her to give his love to Charlie.

  “What was that fucker thinking? Who the hell is Emma? And Katy?” Wes says, as he starts to dish out food.

  I walk around the corner, letting the bomb drop, “Emma is my daughter with Katy.” I don’t care what Katy says. I can’t let people think that I would cheat on Charlie, or that I’d lead her on to hurt her.

  I tell them about last night, and once we all sit down at the dining room table, I start telling them about my meeting with Katy this morning.

  “I lie in bed, watching Charlie sleep. She’s laying on her stomach, and her hair is covering her face. I play with her hair, trying not to wake her. My heart is full, and now, I finally understand all of the stories Quinn and Savannah talked about with our parents love, but I never thought I could comprehend it, until now. My phone starts to buzz and an unknown number flashes across it.

  “Hello,” I whisper, as I quietly get out of the bed, trying not to stir Charlie.

  “Rhett?” Katy’s voice is louder than normal, so I head into the bathroom. “Why are you whispering?”

  �
��What do you want at four-thirty in the morning?”

  “I thought you were always up at this time, or you used to be when we dated. Anyway, if you’re available about nine, we can meet to talk about Emma. Do you remember the country club where we had the debutante ball?” I roll my eyes. She likes to show off her money. “Emma has a golf lesson there, so I’m going to be there anyway, and you get to meet her afterward.”

  “Yeah, I can be there. I’ll talk to the manager of the ranch and let her know since I had some business meetings today with her. No lawyers, right?”

  “Right.” She quickly hangs up the phone, and I sigh. I’m never going to get back to bed, and I know that Charlie’s alarm will go off soon.

  I pause for a bit, before telling them about the awkward silence on the way to the ranch, and then continuing with the story.

  I drop her off, and we go our separate ways. I run into Karen as she’s getting out of her car.

  “Hey, just the lady I needed to see. Can I reschedule our meetings today? Something came up, and it’s a time sensitive meeting.” She agrees to it, and I quickly shower and look into my closet. I grab my black dress pants and light blue button-down dress shirt. I roll up the sleeves, because it’s still Texas, and it’s hot. My tattoos are showing, but I don’t give a fuck. I look for my dress shoes, and I sit down on the chair next to the window, looking out to the mountains.

  It’s so surreal, and my mind is going a million different ways. I went from being single to finding my soulmate to becoming a dad all within a week.

  I’m finally done getting dressed, finished checking myself over, and making sure I smell good, look good, and don’t look too much like a hoodlum that doesn’t belong at the country club.

  I walk down the stairs and head out to my F350. Fuck, the pictures. I wanted to show Emma some family photos, but of course, Katy has to start calling and being a bitch about things.

  “Where are you?”

  “Katy, I had to run back to my house to get some pictures. I’ll be there soon. You said that her golf lessons started at nine, and we weren’t meeting until after, so I didn’t want to get there at exactly then, so she’s not asking a lot of questions.”

  “Just get over here. I don’t have all day. You promised and don’t fuck this up.”

  “I know. I promised I’d be there, and I don’t break my promises. Just breathe. I’m not going to fuck it up.”

  I still have a half an hour. Shit! Charlie. I make some small talk with her, but it’s breaking my heart to look into her eyes, knowing that I’m causing her so much pain. After I leave her, standing in the kitchen, I head over to the country club. I’ve already decided I’m going to tell Charlie, when I leave. I need her to know.

  I pull up to the valet, and I hand over the keys to the guy. I walk into the dining room, looking for Katy. I spot her standing by the bar, talking to some blonde woman. I walk through the dining room, and she catches me out of the corner of her eye.

  “Rhett, I didn’t think you owned anything but jeans.” Katy snickers, and I look to her friend, who I remember as her bitchy, best friend from high school. She’s been in love with Tucker, since they came to the ranch for a swim party.

  “Darlene, never a pleasure. How are you? Tucker doesn’t send his regards.”

  “Oh, I see you’ve grown up. Let me know when you’re done with this loser, and we can leave,” Darlene says, taking her drink and walking away.

  “Shall we sit down?” I ask her, and she nods. We walk over to a table and sit down. The waiter hands us a menu, and I order a coffee. “Where do you want to begin?” I ask her.

  “How about we start with how you bullied my daughter into this meeting?” I take a deep breath. Of course, Daddy War Bucks is here.

  “Mr. Stillman, how are you doing, sir?” I stand and extend my hand to him, but he refuses it, so I sit back down. “I didn’t bully your daughter, sir. I'm not the bad guy in this situation. If anything, it’s you two. You two lied to me all these years about my daughter. You kept me from her, and you denied me a chance to be in her life.”

  “Like you would’ve been there for Katy and Emma.” Mr. Stillman scoffs, as I make fists under the table.

  “You took that decision away from me, and now, we will never know, but I’m here now. I’m not going anywhere either. I want to get to know my daughter, and I want a relationship with her.”

  “Over my dead body.” Mr. Stillman clenches his teeth, and I sigh.

  “With all due respect, sir, you’re not one of her parents. I’m her father, and Katy’s her mother. If you push the issue to keep me from her, then I’m sure that the papers would love the story of how the big, bad business man kept the daughter of the orphaned boy from her. I can see the headlines now. I’m not taking her from Katy. I’m just asking to get to know her and for her to be a part of my family.”

  “Daddy, that doesn’t sound unreasonable,” Katy finally says, after sitting there for ten minutes smirking, as her dad stared me down and berated me.

  “We can get lawyers to get everything in writing, so there is no miscommunication.” I put my hands on his table because I’m trying to remain calm.

  “Lawyers? So, you can drag the Stillman name through the mud?” I refrain from rolling my eyes at him.

  “No, so it doesn’t get to the point where someone is slinging mud at the other person. I’ve learned that it’s better to have an agreement than to just deal with text messages, emails, and phone conversations. There’s a lot of miscommunication there.”

  “Rhett.” Katy’s mom, who was always nice to me, stands next to me. “You’re looking well dear.” I stand up to hug her. “I’ve heard remarkable things about the ranch.”

  “Mrs. Stillman, hello. You look amazing as ever. Yes, the ranch is thriving, and thank you for the gardening tips. I have a new chef that loves to use fresh veggies. Plus, the kids start coming in a few weeks, and they love playing in the garden.”

  “Oh, good. I might have to stop over sometime and get my hands dirty.” Mrs. Stillman sits down, and Katy and her husband both groan. “What? Did you really think that I’d let you railroad him? I didn’t know until last night. These two kept it from me, too. What are they doing to make it up to you?” I look to Katy, who looks to her dad.

  “I want to get lawyers involved to make sure everything is on the up and up, so there’s no miscommunication, when it comes to Emma’s care. I don’t think your husband and daughter want that.”

  “I didn’t say that.” I love watching this man cower, when his wife is around.

  “Here comes Emma. Can we please be adults? I want her to know Rhett. She knows of him already, but she doesn’t realize that she’s going to meet him.” I look behind Katy and see her running towards us. She has this big smile on her face, but when she sees her grandfather, she stops running and smiling. “Mom, Grandfather, Grandma.” She finally notices me, as her smile begins to return.

  “Emma, this is Rhett.”

  “You’re my dad,” Emma states, walking over to me and hugging me. She seems more put together than all four of the adults here at this table. “Are you hungry? I’m starving,” she asks, and I smile and nod. “Mom, can we go to another table, so we can talk and get to know each other?”

  “I’d like to be there,” Katy states, still having her control.

  “Dear, why don’t you take me over to the tennis court. I heard there’s a new doubles team thinking they can beat us,” Mrs. Stillman asks her husband, and he begrudgingly agrees to it. “Goodbye, my loves. Rhett, it’s always a pleasure. Please, tell Quinn congratulations on the wedding and making partner. Katy, leave them alone.”

  “I will, ma’am. Sir.” I nod to him, as he ignores me. Katy’s dad whispers something in her ear, and she nods. I’m pretty sure she’s meant to stay here with us the whole time.

  “Grandfather doesn’t like you. He’s been telling me stories about how you left Mom pregnant and alone, but Grandmother said that was a lie.”

/>   “I didn’t know about you, until last night.”

  “Oh, you bought those pretty flowers. Were they for your girlfriend?” She smiles, and it goes straight to my heart.

  “Yes, they were. She loved them, too. I know nothing about flowers, except I just sneezed almost the whole time I was in the shop.” We laugh, as Katy texts on her phone, and I see that Darlene is glaring at me. “So, tell me about you.” Emma spends the next two hours talking about school, her best friend, riding horses, and how much she hates golf, but she loves swimming. When she’s done, I start showing her pictures of my parents, my brothers, and my sisters.

  “Can I come visit you?” Emma asks me, and I want to say yes, but Katy looks shocked.

  “Why don’t we spend the next week talking on the phone, getting to know each other, and then you can meet your uncles. Then if your mom allows, you can visit the ranch, and we can go from there.”

  “Okay. I have a cell phone. Can we take a picture together, so when we call each other, our picture comes up?” I smile, as she sits on my lap. We take a few pictures together, and she text messages me. Then she sets up my phone with her picture. “Who is this? She’s very pretty.” I look at my phone, seeing the picture of Charlie and I from the night at Cougars. We are smiling and hugging each other.

  “This is my girlfriend, Charlotte, but she prefers to be called Charlie.” Emma shows the phone to Katy. “No secrets, okay?” She nods, but I can tell that she’s not happy that Emma has taken up so well with me.

  “Em, we need to get going. You have horseback riding lessons.” Emma starts to whine, but Katy looks at her with the same look that Mr. Stillman has always looked to her with. I wonder if Emma is being raised the same as Katy, and this concerns me a lot.

  “Call me later, okay?” I say, hugging Emma and kissing her on the top of her head. “Thank you, Katy. This means a lot to me.” I quickly hug her, too, as I watch Emma walk away, and I wipe my sweaty palms on my dress pants. I pay my bill, and then thank the waiter, before walking out to the valet. As I’m waiting for my truck, Mr. Stillman stands next to me.