Can't Walk Away

by Molly McLain

  “Yeah, well, I had things to say too. And right now I’m really glad I didn’t.”

  ***

  Things like what? Like she cared about him, too?

  Dammit! She wasn’t going to make this easy on him, was she? Couldn’t say he blamed her, but if they could just talk this out. If she would give him a chance to explain.

  “I’m sorry about last night,” he said instead of begging like he wanted. She was working and he was on duty and falling on his knees in the middle of the coffee shop wasn’t likely to put to rest the tongues that already wagged about them.

  “Which part?” She picked at something on her sweater and sniffed.

  “I, uh....” He scratched at his head and grimaced. “I was rougher than usual. But I want you to know that I haven’t been with anyone else. So no worries on my end about...you know.”

  She glared at him for five long beats. “On your end? As if things might not be clear on my end? Wow, Mark, thanks for the vote of confidence.”

  “That’s not what I meant...” Shit. Why was he such an epic fucking failure when it came to saying what he needed to say to her?

  “I have work to do, Sheriff, and you should probably move along before you dig yourself any deeper into this hole.”

  “Ally, come on...” He reached out for her arm, but she turned her back on him and went into the kitchen, the saloon-style doors swinging in her wake. “Motherfu—”

  “Mark Dunn, don’t you dare finish that word.”

  He clenched his eyes shut for a moment, then turned and came face to face with Pam Fletcher, his friend Reed’s mom. Pam was also one of his mother’s best friends and, when his folks packed up and moved to Hastings during his senior year of high school, Pam let him move in with her and Reed. That way he could graduate with his class. She’d become like a second mom over the years and to know she’d overheard him talking like a moron... Fuck.

  “Ma’am,” he greeted her as Mark, the cop, hoping she’d let Mark, the punk kid, skate by without a lecture.

  She narrowed her eyes. “Talked to your mother lately?”

  “Just the other day. She’s doing well.” He nodded, trying on a smile that took too much energy to actually pull off.

  “Are you going to Hastings for Thanksgiving this year or are you sticking around home?”

  “Uh...” Turkey Day was six weeks away. He barely knew what he was doing tomorrow. “Haven’t thought about it yet.”

  “Well, you should. Specifically that you’ll visit your mother this year. With Ally.”

  Yeah, that sounded great. Only Ally would have to agree to see him again for that to happen. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  Pam gave him the disapproving mom eye as he headed for the door. “I saw you, you know.”

  He stopped in his tracks, because that statement could mean any number of things. Most of which weren’t good. His bare ass in the moonlight, for example. “Pardon?”

  She smiled. “I know, Mark. And she should know too.”

  Oh. That. “Yeah.” He rubbed a hand around the back of his suddenly burning neck.

  Pam reached out and squeezed his arm. “You’re a natural problem solver, sweetie. You’ll figure this out.”

  He sure as hell hoped so.

  ***

  “It’s perfect. I’ll take it.” Grinning, Ally extended her hand to Ruby, her future landlord and a little old woman who’d recently been banned from bingo night at the convalescent home. Turns out slipping the elderly men Viagra in exchange for extra bingo cards was illegal.

  The devious white-haired woman gave a laugh. “You don’t waste time, do you, girlie?”

  There weren’t many apartments in River Bend to begin with, let alone apartments that were available to rent. This building was cozy, too. Two uppers, two lowers, and a shared laundry room on each floor. Plenty of privacy.

  “I think you’ll get along great with Velma downstairs. She bakes every day, so don’t be surprised when you see cookies outside your door.”

  “Maybe she can share some recipes with me. I’m always looking for new things to try at the coffee shop.” She glanced around the one-bedroom space again. The kitchen was tiny, but the living room and bathroom were decent-sized. She’d have to find furniture to fill that space, but it was just her. She could live like a peasant for a while, no problem.

  “There’s a new tenant moving in across the hall next week, too. A relative of Jose and Stella from the diner. Cutie pie of a guy. Shouldn’t give you any trouble. And since he’s a man, he’ll never fight you for the utility room.”

  Ally chuckled. “Good to know.”

  “Okay then, chickie-poo. Let’s get the paperwork signed so I can give you the key.” Ruby patted her hand and started for the door.

  “The key? I didn’t think I could move in until the first part of November?”

  The older lady tugged at her Caution: Zombies t-shirt and shrugged. “Eh. You’re a good kid. And I hear you’ve had some drama in your love life lately.”

  For real? Even the little old lady landlord knew about her crappy love life? Maybe she should move to the next town over. Or the next state.

  “Come along, cookie. I’ve got a game of Internet poker to play before I take my nap.”

  With a snort, Ally followed.

  Chapter Three

  Ally had gotten herself an apartment.

  Mark sat in his police SUV, watching her and her brother unload boxes from the back of his truck. The longer he watched, the tighter he gripped the steering wheel, because, dammit, she should’ve been moving in with him. Or, if that was too much, too soon, he should have at least been the one helping her get settled.

  It had been a week and a half since she’d told him she needed time. Much as it killed him, he’d backed off, save his daily drop-in at Cedar Street, which they managed to handle like adults. Ally gave him her customary smile when she handed him his change and he left a nice tip in the jar. He hated it, but at least he got to see her pretty face in person. Beat out staring at the pictures he had of her on his phone. And then jerking off like a horny teenager when he looked too long.

  His radio squawked on his shoulder and he answered Rob, grateful for the distraction.

  “Rollins and Parker are headed over to the meet and greet for the new chief. I asked them to bring me back a burger, but you know those assholes.” Rob grumbled. “So I’m hoping you’ll do it. With cheese, please. Hold the ketchup. Extra mustard and pickles.”

  “What the hell do you think I am? Your waitress?” Mark snapped.

  “Hey, no need to get sexist.”

  What? “I am not bringing you food.” Hell, he didn’t even wanna go to the damn fire department shindig, but it was his civic duty to show up and support his fellow community servants.

  “Come on, man. I’m starv—”

  He clicked off the call and cast another glance toward the parking lot where Ally paused on her way to the apartment building. She turned around and looked in his direction. He’d been sitting at the end of the block for close to ten minutes, part of him hoping she’d feel his presence. They had a connection—he knew they did. But instead of waving or smiling, she shook her head and continued inside.

  He let his head fall back against the seat, his eyes closed. She had to come around eventually, didn’t she? He didn’t mind waiting her out if it meant she’d come back. Hopefully sooner than later. But what if he was holding out hope on something that might not happen?

  No. His focus snapped to the building again, just as Ally disappeared beyond the front door. There was no alternative in this situation. He and Ally belonged together. Plain and simple. He’d get her back.

  He put the vehicle into gear and drove across town to the fire station. A small crowd had already gathered and dread settled into his bones. He normally didn’t mind doing the publicity thing, but lately it felt like all eyes were on him. Just waiting for him to do something stupid again. He’d lived in the public eye for the three-plus ye
ars he’d been sheriff and at the beginning, it had been because of his age. It wasn’t every day a twenty-nine year old guy was chosen for such a prestigious position in a small town. Of course, everyone wanted to follow his love life like it was some sort of soap opera. There wasn’t much else going on in River Bend. He’d accepted that as his new reality and took care to keep his nose clean.

  Then came Ally. A woman different than the others. A woman he wanted to shield and protect and share with absolutely no one. Not even the town they’d both grown up in.

  Pushing his pissy mood aside, he ambled up to the station, where he spent a solid twenty minutes shaking hands with community members and accepting kisses from elderly women. At least this time, he’d only had his ass pinched once. Either he was losing his touch or there was something new to distract the old biddies.

  As he pulled back from Ruby Parker’s hug, he caught a glimpse of what that something might be.

  Nick Caliendo had spent a few summers with his Aunt Stella and Uncle Jose from the diner when he was a kid. He was a city brat. Honed on the streets of Newark and full of nerve-grating attitude. The summer between fifth and sixth grades, Mark had given him a fat lip and, a week later, a shiner.

  Hopefully the twenty years between then and now had toned the guy down, because Mark didn’t want to follow up his smashed glass incident with a dislike for the new fire chief. He was up for re-election next year, after all.

  “Hey, Dunn!” Josh Hudson, owner of Hudson Contracting, and one of his best friends, waved him over with a shit-eating grin. “You remember Nick, right?”

  Fucking Josh.

  He sidled over and stuck his hand out to the new guy. “Long time, no see, Caliendo.”

  Nick grinned and hesitated at the handshake. “Is this one of those famous fake-outs of yours? Where you pretend we’re going to be friends and then you pop me in the jaw instead?”

  At least the guy had a sense of humor. “Can’t hit you. I’m on duty.”

  Josh snorted and the volunteer firefighters lurking on the outskirts of the conversation laughed, too.

  Nick shook his head and slid his hand into Mark’s. “In that case, good to see you again. I’ll be sure to avoid you when you’re not wearing the badge. How’s that?”

  Shit, maybe this guy wasn’t so bad after all. Mark smiled. “Congrats on the new job, man. I’m sure Jose and Stella are happy to have you back in town.”

  “I’ve always loved it here. Looking forward to putting down some roots.”

  “Yeah?”

  Nick nodded. “City life isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Glad for a fresh start.”

  Mark pushed the thought to run a background check on the guy out of his mind as quickly as it formed. Of course, he had a clean record. The town wouldn’t have hired him if he didn’t. Paranoid much, Sheriff?

  “In that case, glad to have you back. You’ve got a good crew behind you. Just be leery when they suggest a fire department car wash. Always ends up with a line-up of women in white t-shirts. Fun to look at, but not so fun when I have to ticket them for public indecency.”

  Nick blinked and muttered to his new employees, “We need a fundraiser ASAP. Before the weather turns too cold.”

  Mark laughed and eventually wandered over to the food table for a burger and a Coke. He chatted with a couple preschool kids about trick or treating the upcoming weekend and gave them his usual spiel on checking the candy over with Mom or Dad. Kids were easily the best part of his job. He loved the invitations to participate in the school safety programs, but ever more so when those same kids came up to him on- and off-duty just to say hello. Most just wanted a closer look at his Glock. Some tried to swipe his cuffs. It was always entertaining.

  He’d just stuffed the last bite of burger into his mouth when his radio chirped in his ear. Car versus deer on the outskirts of town. Driver was shaken up, but not injured. He called in his response and hurried back to his SUV.

  Duty called. At least it distracted him from thinking about Ally again. Much.

  ***

  Her first night in her new apartment. Totally awesome.

  Ally threw herself onto the bed and grinned. After living with her parents the past two years, it was better than nice to finally have her own space again. Where she could wander around in her underwear if she wanted to. Stay up late watching Food Network and making her own crazy creations in the kitchen. Heck, she could even have a guy over if she wanted to. She’d never had a problem spending the night at Mark’s, but waking up in her own bed with him beside her? Him smelling up her sheets with all his yummy manliness? Mmm, delicious.

  Too bad she was still mad at him or she might be tempted to invite him over and start this new adventure on a high note. Even if they didn’t end up in bed, they could hang out and catch up, because, God, she missed him. When she’d finally nailed that new chocolate cake recipe, he was the first person she’d wanted to try it. She’d ended up eating half of it herself and then dropping the rest by her brother’s auto shop.

  Sigh.

  Why’d Mark have to be such an idiot? At the root of it all, he was a good guy. A good guy who was really bad at relationships. More than that, he lived for his job. She didn’t want to change who he was, but she hoped he’d realize that, in order to keep a woman in his life, he’d have to compromise a little. No woman in her right mind would willingly play second fiddle to his badge. Not when Mark had so much good stuff to offer.

  But how much longer could she wait for him to figure that out? How much longer could she go on loving him, not knowing if he’d ever feel the same about her?

  It was time to get on with her life. For herself.

  Rolling over, she dug her cell from her pocket and dialed her best friend.

  “All settled, chica?” Jenny Riley answered on the second ring. It was just after eight o’clock and Wednesday night—Jenn’s late night at the salon—so she was probably cleaning up.

  “For tonight, yes. Luke put together my new bed frame so I have a place to sleep. I just need to wash the new bedding I bought.” A pretty silver-blue set of hundred dollar sheets and a fluffy white comforter that would hopefully fit in the washing machine in the utility room.

  “I’m sorry I couldn’t help you move. I took off all that time when Mom had her heart attack and...ugh. Let’s just say that the full schedule and the generous tips have been nice this past week.”

  Ally smiled and tugged a lock of hair up before her eyes. “I have a crap-ton of split ends. You think you have time to squeeze me in sometime soon?”

  “I always have time for you. Especially if you bring wine.”

  Wine, a movie, and a bitch session about how the men in their lives were allergic to commitment. Jenny definitely had it worse though. Her on-again-off-again boy toy, Reed Fletcher, had played head games with her for years. Jenny claimed to not want anything serious with Reed either, but Ally couldn’t figure any other reason why the woman put up with so much of his crap. Or more to the point—his other women. That kind of guy wasn’t for Ally, but who was she to judge if he was right for Jenny?

  “There’s a surprise birthday party for Tony on Friday at the pub, but we could do something Saturday night. Your place or mine?”

  “Yours. I wanna check it out. I also hear your new neighbor is hot.”

  “Nick? Haven’t met him yet.” Their paths hadn’t crossed in the past week since he’d moved in and she’d started bringing over boxes.

  Jenny gave a low, feline laugh. “There are so many firefighter hose jokes I could make right now, but I’m too tired.”

  “Aw. Well, keep them in mind for Saturday night. I’ll get a couple bottles of wine just in case.”

  “In case what?”

  “We decide to invite him over.”

  Jenny sighed. “I’m sorry, honey, but I’m not into three-ways anymore. Too messy. I love you and all, but...”

  Ally snorted so hard, her nose hurt. “That’s...yeah, I’m not touching that one. I’l
l just say goodnight instead.”

  “Probably for the best.” Jenny blew a kiss through the phone and they hung up.

  Ally rolled off the bed and pulled the new sheets from the shopping bag, tearing open the package and running her fingers over the soft fabric. Sliding into bed tonight would be like an orgasm all by itself.

  Grabbing a basket with the detergent, fabric softener, and other laundry items, she padded into the hall in her bare feet. The utility room was dark and she smiled when she flipped on the lights and found a line-up of similar products already on the shelf. Ruby was wrong—Nick did do his laundry.

  She threw in the load of sheets and pillow cases and went back to her apartment to unpack a few boxes. Forty minutes later, she was back in the utility room to transfer things to the dryer when she heard Nick’s door open.

  “So I really do have a neighbor,” he said behind her and she held her breath, because, holy crap, did he have a sexy voice. An accent. East coast maybe.

  “You do.” She closed the dryer, started it, and turned. Wow. Tall, dark, and, if she had to guess, Italian. He was almost pretty, like a male underwear model, and the vision of him posing for one of those sexy firemen calendars came easily to mind. “I’m Ally Barrett,” she said, sticking out her hand.

  “Nick Caliendo. I met your brother Luke earlier when he dropped some things by. You were working?” His eyes were so brown, they were almost black. Jenny would love him. Hell, every woman in River Bend would love him. Fires would start breaking out in wastebaskets all over town.

  “Yes, I’m a barista and baker at the local coffee shop.”

  “Ah.” He leaned his shoulder into the door frame and crossed his arms over his chest. He had tattoos on both biceps. Mark didn’t have any ink his body and—

  Stop thinking about Mark!

  Nick grinned. “What’s that look for?”

  Crap. “Nothing. Just...nothing.” She pushed a hand into her hair and gave a light laugh. “I should tell you that I like to cook. I don’t typically burn things, but it’s happened on occasion. Don’t be surprised if you hear my smoke alarms going off. It’s usually nothing to worry about.”