Incineration (Heart of Stone)

by Sidebottom, D H

  Mason halted and paused before he turned to me. He didn’t say anything but cocked his head. I looked at him sadly, my heart breaking and I tried to swallow the lump that was wedged in my throat. My eyes filled with tears as I shook my head slowly “No Mason” I said softly. I could feel everybody’s eyes on me, confusion written all over them.

  Mason pulled in a large breath and stalked towards me, gripping me harshly again by the upper arms and pulling me “We need to fucking talk” he hissed and I cringed. Sam stepped forward again “Fucks sake Mase, let go of her, you’re hurting her” he demanded. He shot a glare at Sam but released my arms “You’re coming with me Ava” he ordered and I shook my head “No Mason, not when you’re like this” I said quietly, aware that everybody was watching us.

  I could see his chest heaving in anger “Yes. You. Are. You are fucking mine! I need to fuck him out of you!!” he snarled viciously and I heard Sam hiss between his teeth.

  My fist slammed into his cheekbone, snapping his head backwards forcefully. Sam and Nate moved forwards and grabbed Mason’s arms as Brian stepped forwards “Get him fucking out of here!!” he bellowed as he slipped an arm around my shoulders, pulling me close.

  Masons eyes landed on mine. The hurt, pain and disgust in them brought my tears and I shook my head at him as he reached out to me, his own tears now falling “Ava” he choked “I’m so sorry Mason. I’m so sorry” I sobbed, and turned.

  Brian and Brenda huddled me into their car and took me back to their house. They didn’t ask, they didn’t pity me and they didn’t say anything about the night events and for that I loved them even more.

  Brenda quietly led me to their guest room and placed out a pair of her pyjamas, a spare toothbrush and a towel. She kissed my forehead and quietly closed the door behind her and I sat in the dark silence for a long time.

  Around 2 O’clock my phone alerted me to a text

  KADE

  You okay? What’s happening?

  ME

  I’m okay. I’m at Brians. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. I’ll be at yours around 12:30

  KADE

  Are you sure you’re okay? I’m worried about you sweetheart. I swear to god if he hurts you….

  ME

  I promise I’m fine; it’s you I’m worried about. Don’t let him in!!! He’s not coping well with the news

  KADE

  Can I ring you? I need to hear your voice

  ME

  No Kade, I’m tired. We’ll talk tomorrow

  KADE

  Okay. Sweet dreams xxx

  I took a quick shower and climbed into the too long PJ’s, rolling up the legs and as I climbed in bed my phone rang.

  “Hey Babe” Courtney said softly when I answered “Hey” I breathed in relief to hear her voice “Where are you?” she asked hesitantly “Brians and Brenda’s. Thank you for getting Kade out of there” I whispered, not wanting to disturb my hosts “No problem babe. He didn’t wanna go though. He kept trying to get back in to protect you. Which I thought was quite sweet” she said and I closed my eyes “Mason would have killed him, the mood he was in. I ended up punching him” I declared and I heard her gasp as I told her what had occurred

  “I hate myself for what I’ve done to him Courtney” I admitted. She was silent for a while “Ava, there is nothing I can say that will make you feel any better but you have to work out what you want now” she said and I nodded to the darkness “I want Mason, I always have but I don’t think…He’s so angry at me…I’m so damn angry at me and I’ve broken his heart. We always seem to be hurting each other. We’re killing each other slowly and painfully” I told her “Oh Babe” she breathed “Can I stop at yours for a while? I don’t wanna go back to the cottage” I asked “Of course”

  I smiled gratefully “Okay; I’ll be round after work tomorrow. Love you” I ended the call and curled up in bed, visions of Masons broken face filled my head as I drifted into a restless and fretful sleep.

  CHAPTER 49

  I managed to squeeze my breasts into one of Brenda’s silk grey shirts and my ass into one of her skirts and I was surprised how good I looked with a hangover from hell and an arm covered in bruises and a neck full of bites. I had stood in front of the mirror naked this morning and regarded all the love bites Mason had given me in France and now I understood why, he had wanted to mark me as his possession because of Kade.

  I still couldn’t understand why he had waited until the dinner last night to confront me but I had a feeling it was the fact that Kade had been there and the amount of alcohol and coke he had consumed.

  I managed to drag myself through the morning and at 12:30 I was climbing out of a taxi outside Kades apartment with my stomach in knots, my head pounding and my heart clenched in a tight hold at what I had to do. The apartment concierge told me Kade was expecting me and to take the elevator to the 11th floor.

  On exiting the lift Kade was already waiting for me with a huge grin on his face. I smiled timidly and he held the door open for me. I entered slowly, taking in my surroundings as I walked into his large lounge.

  “Drink?” he asked and I smiled and nodded. He disappeared into a kitchen and came back with two glasses and a bottle of wine and gestured to the sofa. “You okay?” he asked softly and I nodded again. His eyes lowered to the patch of neck skin peeking out from behind my open shirt, and his eyes darkened but he didn’t say anything

  “You heard from him?” he asked quietly “No, have you?” he shook his head and I frowned “I can’t understand. He’s known for a while and he didn’t say anything until last night in the restaurant” I took a sip of the wine and it sang in my mouth, its crisp fruitiness stroking my taste buds

  “How did he find out?” he asked “My wonderful neighbourhood stalker sent him photos of us in your pool house” I whispered and Kade closed his eyes and groaned “It must have killed him Kade” His eyes shot to mine at the sadness in my voice and he searched my eyes and then sighed and looked away “You’re not here to make love to me are you?” he said softly and I closed my eyes “No” I whispered and he didn’t look at me but I heard the intake of breath and the harsh swallow.

  We were both silent for a while and he eventually looked at me and smiled sadly “I only hope he can make you happy Ava. I’m going to let you go because I want you to be happy and I know you love him entirely” his voice broke a little and I could see the struggle on his face as he set me free.

  A tear broke free at the pain I felt for him “I am so sorry Kade; I care so much for you but…” I didn’t finish as he placed a finger against my lips “Shush, I know. Don’t let him hurt you Ava, don’t ever let him hurt you” he beseeched and paused before taking a long breath “I’ve been offered a job in Italy Ava” he said on a whisper and held my eyes, wanting me to understand why he was leaving.

  My heart clenched at the thought of never seeing him again but I had to let him go, I needed to let him go for his sake. I nodded slowly and his sad eyes filled with wetness.

  Framing his face in my hands I leant over and kissed him tenderly and gently one last time. His hands slid into my hair and he held me against him, my forehead against his for several minutes until I pulled away, stood and left and as I softly shut the door behind me, my heart broke as I heard his sob break free and I wept all the way down in the elevator and all the way back to the NSC building.

  A part of my heart would always belong to Kade and I knew I would never forget him or the way he had made me come alive and feel.

  Just as I was leaving work my phone rang and I fished it out of my bag and saw Sam’s’ name on the display “Hi” I said timidly, waiting for twenty questions

  “Ava” he breathed and I stuttered to a halt, the hairs on the back of my neck stood to attention “Sam?”

  “We’ve got him Ava” he said and I grabbed onto the doorframe to hold myself up “Really?” I could sense his grin “Oh Yeah. I have some software that traces all his bank activity and I narrowed him down this morning when h
e tried to draw out some cash” he chuckled.

  I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, trying to rein in each of my many emotions “Ava” He said hesitantly “Mason wants you to deal with him” he said quietly and slowly and I swallowed heavily.

  “Okay” I whispered “I’m coming to fetch you, stay at work until I get there” he said and I agreed and ended the call. Holy shit!!!

  I sat on the steps of the building and waited. Could I do this? It had been easy with Dean because the need for revenge had eaten away at me for five long years and every time I had pictured Katie’s face it had fed my rage but Lee was different. Yes I hated him for what he did to me but did I hate him enough to help me finish him?

  Sam arrived fifteen minutes later and drove me out somewhere deserted and derelict. I exited the car and looked around at what looked like an old factory of some sorts and followed him through a series of floors and doorways, his hand in mine to support me as we climbed across some dodgy flooring and over some rubble.

  We eventually entered a room where Greg, Mark, Simon and a couple of other guys waited for me.

  Greg smiled and walked over to me “You ready Ava?” he asked calmly and I nodded. I was saddened that Mason wasn’t there and I wasn’t sure if I could do this without him but I didn’t blame him, the hurt and pain I had caused him had severed his feelings for me, destroyed his love and I couldn’t blame him for not wanting to see me. Even though I expected it I couldn’t say it didn’t hurt, my heart ached for him; to see his beautiful grey eyes, his gaze upon me and the way he smiled at me, the smile he had just for me.

  Sam held out his hand to me and I stared at it, took a deep breath and placed my hand in his. His fingers curled around mine immediately and strongly as if he knew I needed his strength and reassurance.

  He nodded once and then we walked over to another door and he looked at me as he opened the door and then led me through.

  The room was dark apart from a small bulb that dimly lit the middle of the room, right above a chair in which Lee was secured with some rope. He was bloody and already half dead. His head hung low and his breathing was laboured.

  My stomach lurched at the sight of him, the memories surfacing of the way he had held the pillow over my face as he brutally raped me night after night, the feeling of his tongue in my mouth and the way he had clawed and pawed at my body and the recollection of the time he had held his fingers round my throat, squeezing the life of me but I still wasn’t sure it was enough to help me do this.

  I realised why I hadn’t fully recognised him in the NSC car park and the pub; he had been built heavily when we were in care and he was now a lot thinner, he had worn glasses as a teenager and he had now dyed his hair.

  When I took a step closer to him, he lifted his head at the sound of my heels on the hard concrete floor. His eyes were bruised and half closed, his nose was already broken and his mouth looked like it was missing a few teeth behind his split lip. His t-shirt was ripped revealing numerous bruises, cuts and what looked like slash marks. His hair was mangy and stuck out in clumps, knotted together in the dried clusters of blood.

  Somebody had really worked him over, trying to tear him apart whilst still keeping him alive for my benefit.

  He strived to open his eyes as I took a step closer and they widened a little when he saw me. His lip curled and he winced at the pain in the simple action. His head tipped to the side as he gazed at me with hatred and repulsion. My face was completely impassive, not showing one ounce of emotion or feeling towards him. I knew for some reason he would love to stir a reaction out of me, watch me crumble under his abhorrence for me

  “Well well well, if it aint the whore” he sniggered and then winced at the pain of talking. I noticed he was struggling to pronounce some words now that he was missing a few teeth and his mouth and jaw was swollen.

  I remained silent with a vacant expression. “You miss me Ava?” he laughed bitterly and then cringed again “I must say, I miss fucking your lovely cunt” he sneered and I took another step towards him. Keep going Lee!! “You were always good for a fuck, even with a pillow over your face” he scoffed and he shut his eyes for a moment as though it was painful to keep them open for too long.

  Sam’s hand was still gripped tightly in mine and I felt him squeeze it reassuringly as I took another step towards Lee and I was now stood directly in front of him “although I do regret never screwing your arse. I would love to rip your arse to fucking shreds and hear you scream whilst I do it”

  A small snarl at the back of the room snapped my head round towards it. My heart lurched and my blood rushed through my veins as I could make out Masons silhouette in the darkness, leaning against the wall.

  My breathing steadied and my courage surged, my inner self was cheering at his presence and I knew there and then he was here for me, to help me through what had to be done.

  “I loved watching your bastard of a boyfriend screw you roughly. You deserve to be fucked savagely like an animal” he snarled.

  I dropped Sam’s hand and grasped the material of my skirt at my thighs and hitched my skirt up fractionally but slowly “Oh and let’s not forget your other lover. You really are the ultimate whore Ava” he sneered and I noticed Sam glance at me with confusion etched on his face.

  I was so pleased I was wearing my 4 inch spiked heeled boots when I smashed my foot into his face.

  His cheek bone exploded under the collision and he let out a high pitched squeal. I stood looking at him, still expressionless before I shattered his face with my fist.

  He was hanging limply now, not able to talk anymore and I tipped my head at him. Sam reached out to me, a gun in his hand and I glanced up at him. He nodded encouragingly and I took it from him, gripping it tightly in my fingers. I swallowed harshly, my dry throat scratching at the effort. My palms were sweating and I kept licking my dry cracked lips.

  I placed the muzzle against his forehead and he whimpered but he didn’t move.

  I’ll admit I was struggling. Fighting with my inner self to do this, to do what was needed and expected of me. My breathing was heavily and laboured and I was striving to support my legs, my nerves making them tremble violently. I wasn’t sure I could do it and I remained still and quiet for a couple of minutes, panting and sweating heavily.

  A movement in the corner of my eye ordered my attention and Mason came into view. He stood beside me, his eyes were soft but his face was hard and unreadable and he took my hand, grasped it firmly and the feel of it, securely held in mine damn near broke my heart.

  My body came alive with the feel of him, my senses were now on high alert and the hairs on my body stood, as though reaching out to him; my soul mate was close and my body reacted instinctively to him.

  I knew I had to do this for Mason, for the pain and devastation Lee had drilled through Mason when he sent him the photos, when he broke both our hearts.

  He nodded once and I closed my eyes, took a deep steadying breath and pulled the trigger.

  My stomach heaved as I felt his blood splatter my face and I turned quickly and vomited on the cold concrete.

  Hands came around my hair, pulling it back from my face as a hand settled on my back. I retched again and again until I had nothing left to give.

  I refused to look at Lee; I didn’t need that image in my head so I turned towards the door and stood.

  My heart ached as I realised it was Sam who held my hair; Mason was nowhere to be seen. He had helped me through what was needed and then left. His obvious repulsion and loathing of me ripped me open.

  I had lost the man that had given me his love so freely and unconditionally. I had hurt him so much that he couldn’t see a way back but I understood him completely and totally.

  Sam took my hand and we exited the room “Clear up” he said bluntly to the other men and escorted me back to his car. He placed me in the front seat next to him and he crouched down in the door frame “You okay?” he asked compassionately and I just nodded “He loves
you Ava” he said simply and I looked into his sad eyes

  “I hurt him so much Sam”. He nodded and squeezed my hand and then drove me to Courtney’s.

  She was stood in the doorway waiting for me after Mason had rung and told her to expect me. She took me in, bathed me and curled up behind me in bed and held me all night long.

  CHAPTER 50

  I returned to my little cottage the next day and was thrilled when I found it redecorated and furnished with brand new furniture and I couldn’t hold back the huge smile when I saw a large flat screen TV fixed to the wall above the fireplace.

  I was tempted to text Mason to thank him but refrained, knowing he wouldn’t want to hear from me.

  My bedroom exhibited a brand new king sized white iron bed with crisp white linen embroidered with soft blue orchids that reminded me of France and I loved it immediately.

  I received a delivery of pink and white roses in the afternoon and my heart soared when I thought they were from Mason and I opened the attached card

  Thank you for sharing a part of you with me

  I will always love you

  Goodbye Ava

  Be happy

  Kade xxx

  I finally cried then; loudly, gut-wrenchingly and painfully until my head and throat hurt. I had not only destroyed myself but the man I loved with all my soul and heart and another man who would sell his soul to have me.

  The next several weeks dragged by and I wasn’t eating properly or sleeping. My body was screaming at me for relief to my punishment and I was constantly ill from the effect of not enough food, too much coffee and self-loathing and I was permanently tired.