Find Me Series (Book 4): Where Hope is Lost

by Dawson, Trish Marie

  When a strange male voice screeched through the radio from the open cabin, the plane went silent. My mouth parted from Connor’s and our hands fell into our laps, and all of us listened to Lou talk to the low voice. They exchanged information, strange words that could have been code talk and quick banter, before the plane tilted and Lou turned us toward the ocean. Shortly after, it was there, surrounded by a blinding sea of twinkling yellow lights from the burning colors of sunset. The island started out as a simple dark dot against an amber glow, the backdrop of day quickly fading away, and those of us near a window pressed our noses to the glass as the dark spot took on the definite shape of land.

  “It’s beautiful,” I said, fogging up the window with my breath.

  During the plane’s descent, Connor pulled my hand into his lap and curled his fingers around my neck. Into my ear, so no one else would hear, he whispered, “No matter what happens next, I’ll love you forever.”

  “What happens next?” I whispered back, feeling the hot air of his breath hit my cheek.

  The sad smile he gave me in return was haunting, and I reached for his face to ask what it meant, but Zoey scrambled to her feet, trying to jump into my lap. Her nose bumped into my stomach, sending a sharp jolt of pain around my midsection. Connor spent the next two minutes trying to keep her calm as the plane touched down on the short landing strip with a slight shudder.

  The baby began to cry, Keel started to complain about being hungry, and Lou came out of the cockpit, stretching and giving us disembarking orders, which included waiting for the tower operator to board the plane.

  Connor moved into the aisle, and the nagging feeling that something was wrong with him was temporarily forgotten as everyone began to bustle about, grabbing their things and pressing forward to take a seat closer to the exit. After Connor was inadvertently pushed to the front by Cole passing by, it was Kris who helped me stand and move up the aisle, closer to Drake, who had yet to rise from his seat.

  Lou was the first to step out onto the runway, telling us to stay put before he wandered toward the control tower. A man wearing a backwards baseball cap waited for him with his hands on his hips, and a broad smile on his face. After a bear hug, the two chatted, and Lou gestured at our group more than once during the conversation.

  “What do you think they’re talking about?” I asked Drake, as his knees swung out into the aisle. In one hand he held onto his winter coat, something I didn’t think he’d need once on the island, and in the other, the strap of his backpack.

  “I guess we’ll find out soon enough.” He stood in the narrow space between us, swung his pack over one shoulder and stared down at the top of my head. “How was your flight?”

  Part of me wanted to tell him everything, lay it all out in a brutally honest way, but another part of me, the selfish part, wanted to keep the entire flight to myself. Before I could say anything, Lou stepped back onto the plane with the tower operator.

  He waited for us to settle down, and then cleared his throat. “Ladies and gents, this quiet fellow here is Wade Gibbs, and don’t let that baby face fool you. He runs the tower, and oversees communications on the island. Wade,” Lou said with a smile, stepping back so that Wade could address our group. “They’re all yours.”

  The bulky man scratched at the inside collar of his sweatshirt. His head appeared to be shaved under the cap, and his skin, the rich color of Brazilian coffee, was almost wrinkle-free. It was hard to pinpoint his age, but it had to be close to Lou’s, based on the tenor of his gravelly voice. When he spoke, we all listened.

  “Welcome to the Airport in the Sky,” he said with a curt nod. “I’m Wade, as you already know. I run this hill, despite the lack of regular visitors. Mayor Goodman’s on his way, but I’m afraid he wasn’t expecting so many of you. We’ll hash out details later. For now, if you could wait on board for a bit, we’ll start putting some things in motion to make tonight a bit more comfortable for you all.” He paused and glanced toward the back of the plane and I looked over my shoulder at the middle-aged nurse with dark blonde hair pulled back away from her face. She adjusted the weight of the baby in her arms, as if it had suddenly become heavy. Wade waved at her. “Ma’am, you can come with me.”

  There wasn’t much room to move aside for her, so I ended up bumping into Drake, who put an arm around me carefully and pulled us out of the aisle. As the mother passed by, she took extra care to make sure she didn’t jostle the baby. When the diaper bag strap slid off her shoulder and dropped to the ground, Kris squatted to help her pick it up, and both Drake and myself stiffened when the woman bent forward. As her shirt lifted, a large handgun that was tucked into the waistband of her jeans was clearly visible. She straightened, fixed her clothing, and then left the plane without a word. I watched her walk across the runway, vanishing under the tiled awning of the tower building.

  In the fading light, cacti that were dotted around the dry landscape in clumps stood out like tiny sentries, and I tried to search through the brush to find the source of a soft humming. When a golf cart popped into view a few seconds later, and then a second right behind it, we all moved closer to a window and watched a thin man climb out of the first cart. In slacks that were a bit too tight, and a crisp work shirt, the Hispanic man that stood before us had an almost retro look about him. His dark hair was cut short, parted on the side and slicked back. His eyebrows, though trimmed, were crooked in size due to one being split down the length by a thick scar. And he had a handlebar mustache that belonged in a black and white film. After briefly sending the young and nervous looking couple from the second golf cart into the nearby building, he smoothed the lines out of his pants and approached the plane.

  With a warm smile, he boarded and greeted those who had moved to the front of the plane with a strong handshake, and even took a moment to waggle his fingers at Lily.

  “Welcome, welcome,” he said over and over with just a hint of a Spanish accent. “My name is Domingo Goodman, Mayor of this splendid rock.” He paused to suck in a deep breath and then patted Lou on the shoulder. “It’s a big night,” Domingo said, bouncing on his feet. “We didn’t have much time to prepare for your arrival, but considering how special this delivery is, I’m sure we can make room for a few more.”

  “Special?” Drake said, glancing sideways at me.

  The Mayor clapped his hands together. “Ah, yes, very special indeed.” He glanced at Jacks, who was holding a squirming Lily. “Lou…the baby’s just lovely. Well done.” Confused, Jacks pulled her closer to his chest.

  “Oh, sorry, Mayor…” Wade said from the open door, gesturing behind him at the building. “The delivery’s inside. I’ll start the transfer.”

  While our group sent furtive looks back and forth to each other, Keel’s eyes found mine and held them. He shook his head with a subtle urgency, as if warning me to keep quiet. We watched as Wade crossed the tarmac and entered the tower building while listening to the Mayor go over a handful of rules, which basically consisted of not killing anyone, not taking anything without permission, not setting fires in enclosed areas, and being considerate of the environment at all times.

  “It’s like sixth grade camp,” Drake complained, kicking at the seat in front of us.

  “Funny you should mention that,” Mayor Goodman laughed. “Because the closest lodging we have available for you is down in the cove where the island used to host educational camping trips. There are plenty of cabins, but no food. We’ll send something over before lights out.” When Drake opened his mouth to object to the proposed curfew, the Mayor smiled. “Don’t worry, you can stay up all night if you choose, but the island has to conserve energy. We ask all non-essential electricity be off by 10:00 p.m. in this region. If you’re scared of the dark, we’ll provide you with flashlights,” he said with a wink.

  “Riley,” Drake said. “Really?”

  “If you’re going to complain about sleeping in a cabin on the beach, there’s no hope for you,” I lectured him under my breath
. He half-hugged me, pulling me tightly into the scratchy fabric of his dirty flannel shirt. His deodorant, if he’d even put any on at the beginning of the day, had faded to only a whisper of fragrance, but I didn’t mind the natural smell of his body. It wasn’t overpowering, it was cathartic in a way.

  When the Mayor spoke again, I swayed out of Drake’s trance and straightened my shoulders. “If you’re ready to turn in, there’s a tour bus just around the corner there. You can follow me down to the cove and I’ll leave you to settle in,” the Mayor said. “Lou, will you be staying tonight?”

  “Yep. Leaving at dawn.”

  “Well, you can ride with me then, and keep me company. Oh, I was told one of you is recovering from an injury?” His dark, but inviting eyes scanned the group. When they landed on mine, they hovered.

  “Is it that obvious?” I grumbled, embarrassed.

  Mayor Goodman laughed. “We have a clinic on the island, but the services are basic. The worst we’ve had to treat here were some broken bones. Usually it’s minor cuts, burns, things of that nature. But we have medicine, should you need it, though Lou said you came with a few things.”

  With a grunt, Drake said under his breath, “He obviously doesn’t realize how much trouble we are.”

  “Shush,” I told him, staring at the back of Connor’s head. During the flight, he couldn’t get enough of my attention, but that changed the moment we touched down. Since landing, he refused to make eye contact.

  The sky had fallen into night as we talked, and as the first visible stars twinkled above us, we walked off the plane and crossed the smooth surface of the runway, following the Mayor to an empty tour bus. We climbed into it quietly, each of us silently wondering about what was in store for us on the island. Without being told, Keel slipped behind the wheel and yawned as we waited for the Mayor and Lou to lead the way. But just before he climbed into his own vehicle, the young couple who had followed him to the airport came out of the building. After the Mayor gave them an emotional hug, they climbed into their own golf cart and turned up the road, back the way they had come. Even though the light was gone from the day, there was enough to see that the woman was holding something in her arms.

  “Was that the baby from the plane?” I asked, squinting out my dirty window.

  Keel made a sound from his seat, but didn’t turn around.

  “Where’s the mother?”

  Again, no answer from Keel. I watched them pull away from the airport, and vanish into the shadows of the winding road, and then the Mayor’s golf cart was on the move too, and the strange family was forgotten as I struggled to not cry out during the turns and dips in the road. Even though the ride itself was bumpy and loud, it was oddly still outside. There was wildlife on the island, but we saw none on the entire drive down to the dark cove. When the dirt road ended, we stared into the darkness of early evening until we spotted a handful of buildings that dotted the hill. Cabins, plenty of them.

  Goodman promised food, and bid us a good night. When Jin commented about being in the camp on our own, armed and unsupervised, the Mayor laughed and said, “You can’t steal an island overnight, now can you?” We watched the lights from his golf cart go back up the winding road until there was no sign left of the beams.

  As a group, we agreed to stay together for the night, and set up temporarily in one of the hillside cabins. All that was inside were bunks and a few shelves, but plenty of room for everyone. While the navy sky deepened in color, more stars came out, and slowly our eyes adjusted to the dim light. No one bothered to unpack; we dumped our belongings on our bed of choice and then returned outside into the pin-pricked night, where the air was cool, but not freezing. Standing below the thick blanket of stars, we tasted the salty air on our tongues, and listened to the roar of waves rolling in and out of the small bay, like the rush of wind we’d grown accustomed to hearing through the woods of Arizona. The baby squirmed in her dad’s arms, fascinated by the sounds of the ocean, and we sat down in the wet grass and listened to the water come and go.

  It hurt to stay upright, so I stretched out on my back, holding onto my sutures, and hoping that the jostling about hadn’t torn any. Zoey circled the group with excitement, jumping and rolling through the sandy grass, and though she needed a bath before we’d been there a whole five minutes, I let her enjoy being a happy dog. She had earned it.

  “Stay close,” I told her, as she went from person to person, sniffing knees and hands and licking faces.

  “Don’t worry, she won’t get more than five feet away from you,” Drake said. “Not any time soon.”

  Zoey needed a break from life just as much as the rest of us. As I breathed in the familiar salt-soaked smell of the Pacific Ocean, my tight lungs relaxed. Nothing came close to the calming feel of the coast. Drake tapped my arm with his water bottle and waited for me to take a long sip. When I handed it back, our fingers brushed together, and he let his hand linger.

  “Someone’s coming,” Cole said. “See…headlights.” Twenty minutes had passed since the Mayor left us on our own.

  I didn’t bother to get up until I heard the soft sputtering of the engine come to a stop. The heavy moisture in the air twisted the ends of my hair into curls and I wrapped the mess into a loose braid to keep the gentle breeze from repeatedly making me eat my own hair.

  “Is it Wade?” I asked, watching a large man hop out of a golf cart, the go-to vehicle for the island. He pulled a box off the passenger seat and crossed the grassy slope to where we waited, partially invisible in the dark.

  As the men rose to meet him, I stayed on the grass with Kris, Lily, and the dog, fantasizing about how much easier life on the island must be compared to the snow-covered mountains we just left.

  “We could stay here forever,” Kris said, plucking at the grass. “I mean, if there’s fresh water. We could fish, I guess, and stay here in the cove a long time, couldn’t we?”

  “These are temporary digs, kiddo,” I reminded her. “If things work out, who knows where they’ll put us.”

  Her face fell. “But it’s so pretty here.”

  “This whole place is pretty, you’ll see.”

  “I wouldn’t mind us being alone down here. Just for a little while, I mean. Not forever or anything.”

  Lily rolled onto her side and squawked. When Zoey crawled up next to her and let the baby yank on her ear, I scratched her back and watched Wade unload his cart. He left several boxes with us, and when the guys brought them over, they were full of hot food, water, a bag of dog chow and a can of baby formula.

  “Wow,” I mumbled, sifting through the box with one of the several flashlights I found inside. “They thought of everything, didn’t they?”

  “We can make a fire,” Connor said. “But it needs to stay small, and away from the buildings.”

  It was the first time I’d heard him talk since we stepped off the plane. “I’m up for a fire.”

  The darker the sky got, the colder the air became. While Drake and Jin set off to search the other buildings for wood, the rest of us moved the food to a table. As we picked at it, the soft glow of flames began to flicker over the sand, and I dumped a heaping serving of spaghetti into a bowl to take to Drake, who had stayed on the shore.

  “Aren’t you hungry?” I asked him, lowering the bowl into his hand. He didn’t get up, but took the food with a smile.

  “This beats the view I had over the last month.”

  “Yeah, hard to top the ocean.”

  “Riley…this place, it won’t be paradise. You know that, right?”

  I nodded. “I guess I do. But for tonight, let’s just pretend.”

  He took my hand, and stared at it in the firelight. “I’m tired of doing that,” he said.

  My laugh was so quiet, I doubted that he heard it over the waves. “Since when do you pretend to do anything?”

  He squeezed my hand and rotated it, examining my palm. “I do it every time he looks at you. Every time he touches you. I pretend that I can handl
e it. I can’t, Riley.”

  We stared over the fire, through the white smoke that drifted out of the cove and to the west, holding hands, unable to speak our thoughts. Drake picked at his food, and I picked at the edge of my bandage through my shirt. Eventually, one by one, the others came to join us at the fire, and Drake reluctantly released my hand. When Connor sat on the other side of me, Drake shifted, putting at least a foot of space between us.

  “What do you think will happen tomorrow?” Kris asked, balancing Lily in her lap with a bottle.

  “This place is already way different from the Ark,” Cole said, watching her closely. His eyes softened every time they fell on the girl.

  “Doesn’t seem smart, just letting us camp out down here,” Drake said. “They didn’t even take our guns, or search us.”

  Lou circled the group, reaching into a box and handing out a Corona to those interested. By the time he got to me, I took the beer bottle with reverence, and turned it around in my hand.

  “It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you, my friend,” I said with a smile.

  Connor laughed, taking one for himself. When Lou reached Cole, the group all turned to look at me, waiting for my approval. With an indifferent shrug, I said nothing. Cole beamed and reached into the box, pulling out two of the longnecks and handing one to Kris. Keel was the last to grab a drink, which still left a few in the box.

  As each of us sipped on the semi-cool beer, listening to the bonfire pop and sizzle, we waved the smoke out of our faces when the wind shifted. We engaged in small talk with the people next to us, and shared funny stories over the last year of our lives, which quickly turned into somber moments when Jacks brought up Win, and Kris brought up Skip. When the group fell silent, I rose with Connor’s help and asked Lou for two more beers. As everyone watched, I slowly poured them out beside the base of the fire, saying their names just loud enough to be carried off by the wind.