"She wants Kalen and me to hasten our union." I say the words quietly for I know they will upset him and I am not mistaken.
They do.
"Does she suspect you specifically?"
I shrug my shoulders because honestly, I do not know. I cannot tell. She is playing some sort of game but I am unclear as to what kind. "She is power hungry right now. This may be nothing more than a whim of hers."
He kisses the tip of my nose and I cannot help but smile. When I am with him nothing else matters. There is nothing more important than his arms wrapped around me.
Ryland is deep in thought so we simply sit enveloped in one another's arms. It seems as if only a handful of moments have ticked by when the shadows begin to stretch and lengthen across the stone pathway before us. Finally he clears his throat. "I think we must leave as soon as possible."
It is more of a relief than anything else to hear him give voice to the words. The longer we live this falsehood the more we continue lying to those around us. We also run the risk of being caught. But it is the lies that are eating gleefully away at my innards. I cannot bear to keep telling them. At this point I would rather take my chances and run away with Ryland than continue with this charade for I am nothing more than an anxious bundle of nerves.
"When?"
One side of his mouth quirks upward. "And here I thought you would need convincing."
Morosely I shake my head. "No. I cannot live without you. Every day that slowly slides by, my love for you only grows stronger. My feelings are not going to change." I search his eyes unhappily knowing that in order to choose him I must destroy my sister's future. It is a terrible choice. But, in the end, there isn't a choice to be made for I cannot live without him.
My heart will cease to beat without him.
I will cease to be without him.
"No," he says softly, "they will not." He kisses my forehead lovingly before adding, "I am relieved you are in agreement."
"What do we do now?"
"Two days should give me enough time to gather the necessary provisions." He holds my eyes. His gaze searches mine carefully for any hint of doubt. "Are you certain, Lili? Are you absolutely certain?"
My hands go to his face. "I could not be more certain of my love for you." I glance away knowing that this is the ultimate betrayal of my sister for she will be the one most hurt by what transpires. I think of Kalen as well but it is Shaylee who will suffer most. And yet, I still do not feel there is another choice to be made. This love that courses rampantly through me only deepens and strengthens with the passing of each day. I say firmly, "I cannot live without you. I will risk everything for the chance to be together."
He sighs in relief as if he were truly afraid I might say otherwise. As if I could possibly say otherwise. Then he is serious once more before adding, "If you do not show up at sunrise two days hence, if you decide to change your-"
I start to object when he lays a finger across my protesting lips.
Solemnly his eyes hold mine. There is such seriousness within them that I do not even try to object. "If you change your mind, I will understand and forgive you. I know how much you love your sister and do not wish to hurt her. I could not be more humbled by your sacrifice."
"You sacrifice much as well, Ryland. Let us not forget that." I add fervently, "This will cost you the Faerie Realm."
He shakes his head slowly. "The realm means nothing if it is not you who stands beside me." He searches my eyes, his expression suddenly quizzical. "Do you not understand that none of this means anything without you? The moment I laid eyes upon you, I was struck by this feeling that we were meant for one another. It was a feeling of rightness that I have never experienced before. It does not matter if we have to defy everyone and everything to be together. I cannot live without you. I cannot. And I won't. I swear to you, we will find a way, Lili." He seals his vow with a kiss. It is a promise of a future shared. "I swear it upon my life."
I am both awed and humbled by the depth of his emotion. Until today, at this very moment, I knew not what it felt like to have just such a love.
A love worth defying everything for.
A love worth dying for.
I see it blaze brilliantly from his eyes. I know we will indeed defy everything and everyone for the chance to be together.
Or we will die trying.
"I love you, Ryland." I hold his eyes needing him to see that I return every drop of emotion that shimmers within his dark depths. My love for him is just as strong, just as true. It runs just as deeply as his does for me. "No matter what happens, I will always love you."
He leans down, capturing my mouth one last time and I feel the love between us as if it is a living breathing entity with a life force all its own. I am amazed by just how all-encompassing it has become. And like the air which is so vital for breath, that is exactly how necessary Ryland has become to me.
"I love you too, Lili." He holds my gaze. "No matter what happens, we will find a way to be together. For me, there is only you."
Chapter Thirteen
The next two days pass tortuously slow. Now that a decision has finally been made and plans set in motion, it is even more difficult to be around Shaylee. Once she realizes what I have done, what I have stolen from her, she will be absolutely devastated.
By choosing Ryland, who I can no longer imagine living without, I ruin my sister. She has always been my confidante just as I have been hers. This love affair is the first secret I have ever kept from her. There are times when I am absolutely certain she must sense that all is not as it should be between us. Whether she realizes it or not, my love for Ryland now stands firmly between us. Just as I am thinking this, Shaylee sweeps into my rooms. The dinner hour is fast approaching and we cannot be late.
I glance at Shaylee from where I stand in front of the looking glass. She is utterly luminous this evening. She shimmers and shines with every graceful step she takes. Her heavy black locks are piled high on top her head. A crown of silver roses is woven within her perfectly coiffed hair.
Since our arrival at the palace, Shaylee's metamorphosis has truly been completed. She is confident in her growing power. Poised and elegant. Already her bearing is that of a young queen. She has truly grown into the faerie who will one day rule the Realm.
She was born and raised for this and it does not escape me that I shall be the one who carelessly plucks her rightful future from her nimble little fingers. It was never my intention to betray Shaylee but that does not excuse what I am set upon doing. Nor does it change the course of action that has been set into motion.
She is in unusually high spirits this evening. Her eyes are dancing and there is a smug little smile playing around the corners of her full pink lips. My heart stills. I am instantly on high alert. No good can come from just such a look.
So it is carefully that I say, "You are in a good mood this evening, sister."
Her smile lifts even more before she twirls away so that her back is to me. She says absolutely nothing in response to my probing comment.
My nerves dance and skitter as the ensuing silence stretches uncomfortably between us. My eyes narrow. "What are you up to?"
She throws a coy look over her shoulder. Her eyes are alive with a delicious secret. "Oh, you shall see."
I gulp no longer wanting to attend dinner. I have desperately missed seeing Ryland these past two days and was quite looking forward to being near him before everything unfolds tomorrow morning but no longer do I wish to do so. I am fearful of what my sister has up her sleeve for clearly there is some mischief afoot. I glance in the looking glass one last time before straightening my shoulders resolutely.
Better to get this over with.
No matter what she is planning, there is not much that can transpire in the short amount of time I have remaining at this court. I hug that knowledge close to my breast before turning towards her.
She looks me over carefully before looping her arm through mine. "I have a surprise
for you."
Anxiety creeps into my voice. "Oh?" My heart picks up its tempo until I suspect it might burst from my chest.
"I think you will be most pleased."
It is highly doubtful that I will be pleased with any of Shaylee's machinations. "And you will not tell me what you have arranged?"
The smile is slow in spreading across her face. It holds a certain slyness that makes my heart skip a beat. "No, that is the one key element that makes it a surprise."
We begin walking down the long pink and black marble corridor to the formally appointed dining room where our evening meal is being held. Already faeries are loitering about. My nerves jump again as I see the Queen sweep regally into the magnificent room. Ryland lounges casually at the opposite end of the cavernous crystal room. He is surrounded by guards and attendants. Our eyes touch briefly, just one quick glance to make certain all is well before he turns back to those he is conversing with. The moment we step over the threshold into the large double story candle lit room, Kalen immediately flanks my side.
His dimples flash charmingly as he smiles. He bows formally to my sister before leaning over to kiss my cheek softly. "Greetings."
Smiling, I meet his eyes. I am past the point of wishing that I could have fallen in love with him. It is much too late for such foolish yearnings. After tonight it will no longer matter and for that I am thankful. The continual pretense is exhausting.
"You both look exceptionally lovely this evening."
My sister smiles coquettishly as her eyes sweep the room for her betrothed. I know the instant they settle upon him for her bright smile dims in wattage. In no way does he acknowledge her presence. All at once, I see how his indifference crushes her and part of me wishes he would simply walk over and, at the very least, attempt to engage her in polite conversation but at this point, does it really matter? After this evening, they will never see one another again.
After this night, Ryland will truly be mine.
Shaylee waits a heartbeat then two. Once she realizes that Ryland is not going to acknowledge her, she turns her bruised attention towards Kalen. Her eyes instantly warm and the smile returns to her face. She loops her arm through his before gazing coyly up at him.
Perhaps, had I any real tender feelings for Kalen, this flirtatious behavior would upset me but it does not. With the pair of them occupied, I allow my gaze to stray towards Ryland. Every time it does, he seems to sense it before capturing my eyes with his own. I instantly lower them before turning my attention elsewhere but I cannot keep from watching him.
Dinner is a long tortuous affair that feels as if it will never draw to a close. Being that this is a formal dinner, a seating arrangement has been carefully planned. I am seated directly across from Ryland. Kalen is to my left. Shaylee is next to Ryland on the right. The Queen presides at the head of the table. All other faeries are seated according to their rank and regard. The more important one is to the court, the closer one is seated to the Queen.
Seven courses are served. Each more decadent, more scrumptious than the previous. Conversation flows easily and merrily around the table but I do not participate. There are tiny little butterflies dancing in my belly making it all but impossible to partake in this meal. I avoid Ryland's gaze for both Shaylee and the Queen have an excellent view of us from their seats. I do not want anyone to notice the manner in which we watch one another.
All I can do is sit there, silently counting down the hours until this deception is firmly behind us.
Towards the end of the dessert course, I notice the Queen raise her brow ever so slightly to Shaylee as if giving her some sort of private communication. The nerves in my belly stretch and lengthen knowing that whatever surprise Shaylee has up her sleeve will soon be unveiled in front of everyone who is present. Shaylee smiles before her eyes spear mine. For just a moment I think I see a hard edged glint in them before it disappears making me wonder if I saw it at all.
Holding my gaze, she speaks to the table at large. Private conversations are immediately curtailed as everyone waits in anticipation for what the future queen will say. Because Ryland is seated next to her and I am keenly aware of his every movement, I see the way his jaw tightens. His whole body stiffens as he awaits her words. He, too, realizes that whatever she has planned will somehow involve me.
Out of the corner of my eye I watch as the Queen takes a small sip from her golden goblet. Her amethyst eyes sparkle just as my sister's do. In that suspended moment of dreaded anticipation, I feel like a frightened rabbit caught in a snare. Schooling my features, I do not allow any sign of trepidation to show upon my face as I continue holding her eyes.
"My dearest sister, Lilianna, you have been invaluable to my smooth transition here at the palace. Without you, I do not believe I would be as fully prepared as I am to take my rightful place as the future faerie queen. I will forever be indebted for all you have so selflessly given. Your service and dedication to this court can never truly be paid in full. But still, I have spent much time debating just how I can repay such loyal service-"
I gulp knowing full well that I have been nothing of the sort.
Has she somehow ferreted out the truth?
I search her eyes carefully and still, I do not know. I cannot tell what is transpiring within her head.
The nerves in my belly constrict painfully and I wonder once more where all this will lead to. I can barely stand it. The drawn out tension has me feeling as if I will jump right out of my skin.
"-it has taken a great deal of consideration, but I have finally come up with the perfect gift." Only then does her gaze travel leisurely around the immense table before finally resting upon Kalen. "My devoted sister has fallen hopelessly, madly, passionately in love with the most wonderful faerie." Kalen's cheeks redden as he grins happily. His dimples flash engagingly as she continues. "At dawn tomorrow morning, just as the sun kisses the realm, my sister and her betrothed shall be united."
Gasps of pleasure ring throughout the vast two story crystal room. Cheers and then applause break out around the table. Congratulations are immediately given. Feeling sick, I smile thinly accepting them. A loud buzzing starts in my head drowning out almost everything else.
Tomorrow morn.
Dawn.
She intends to make me someone else's. That is precisely when Ryland and I are supposed to meet at the oak tree by the stream. Has she uncovered our plan?
My gaze flickers to Ryland.
For one brief moment, his eyes fasten onto mine before sliding quickly away. He lays his napkin down before slowly rising. I track his every movement as does the entire table. With a few long legged strides, he closes the distance separating us until he is at my side, staring down at me. My eyes are wide as he fills my entire line of vision. My heart beats painfully against my breast.
I cannot imagine what he will do next.
I am terrified of what he will do next.
I gulp, as our eyes cling openly in front of the entire faerie court as we have never allowed them to before.
He touches my hand and the instantaneous spark of recognition that is always present pulses between us before he slowly pulls me to my feet. He takes both my hands as we continue staring at one another.
But it is his expression that arrests my attention for it is casual as if we are barely acquainted with one another. It is as if I am nothing more than what I was always meant to be.
His intended's sister.
Someone whom he barely knows. "I ask that everyone raise a glass to Lilianna and Kalen and the union that will join them together for eternity."
The entire room erupts into thunderous applause as they collectively raise their crystal glasses, toasting us with hundreds of well wishes. With the jubilant chatter surrounding us, Ryland leans over to lay a chaste kiss upon my cheek. Just as he is about to pull away, he murmurs so that only I can hear his words. "We meet tonight at midnight."
My smile never falters. I dip my head as if accepting the well wishes
of the Faerie Prince himself. He steps away just as Kalen engulfs my icy cold hand in his warm one. He squeezes it cheerfully. He is delighted with my sister's sudden announcement and I begin to realize that he does not seem nearly as surprised as I am. I cannot help but wonder if he was apprised beforehand of the events that would unfold this night.
It seems as if only Ryland and I have been ambushed by my sister's good will.
Shaylee is suddenly at Ryland's side looping her arm through his before gazing happily up at him. "Are you not pleased that my sister will unite with one of your most trusted advisers?" She stares adoringly up at him with wide gray eyes and I cannot tell if she is being manipulative or if she truly thinks to appease him with this impromptu union. "I hope you are as delighted as I am. Lilianna will forever remain close to me at the palace."
He eyes hold hers. It is one of the few times I have seen him do so. His jaw, so taunt, relaxes marginally before he actually smiles down at her as if she truly matters to him. As if he is indeed pleased by her sly machinations. Never have I seen him give her such a tender look and instantly I see how affected she is by it. Her eyes glaze over just a bit as her smile deepens. She raises herself up onto the toes of her slippers and very gently kisses him on the lips. I glance quickly away not wanting to witness their intimacy even though I know it is fraudulent. In fact, it is for that very reason I can no longer bear to watch. For Shaylee, this is the beginning of something wonderful with the faerie she will one day be united with.
But I know the truth.
This is nothing more than a self-serving deception to lull Shaylee into a false sense of contentment. Remorse tugs at my heartstrings and all at once I feel terribly for her. I detest that I am the one who will steal what she longs for most. After this night she will despise me. She will cease to call me sister.
There is a thin reedy voice inside my head telling me that it is not too late to turn away from Ryland and what I feel for him. I can do what is right instead of inflicting anymore harm onto her. I force myself to watch as she kisses him once more.
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