The Lost Voice

by V. St. Clair

  “Were you followed?” Jessamine asked immediately.

  “No.”

  “I don’t suppose you want to tell me who has been watching you for the last few days?”

  “A few of my peers.” He shrugged as though this was a matter of no consequence. “It’s not unusual. We’re a nosy group and we like to know what confidential assignments others are on. I’ve always been a subject of interest due to my close ties with your father—and now with you.” He explained all of this very matter-of-factly, stepping further into the room and sitting on the couch.

  “Who has been watching you recently?”

  “I have no idea. The ones I know about are Dred, Andro, and Zenaya. Andro and Dred have become very interested in where we go when we leave the Augenspire unannounced. I asked Ana to tell my mother it isn’t safe for me to return there for a little while so she doesn’t find it odd when we are out of touch.”

  “You don’t think they know where we’ve been going, do you?”

  “No, but I need to be more careful than ever or they’ll manage to tail us one of these nights. Anyway, I’ve planted enough clues to hopefully convince them that I’ve been escorting you to private meetings with Darius’ father to work out some last-minute bonuses to your shipping deal.”

  “Oh—good.” She nodded. “Now we can—”

  “Did you hear there was a third Gifted found murdered downtown?” Topher interrupted, and Jessamine’s eyebrows raised in shock.

  “So soon? And no, I hadn’t heard.” And why wasn’t I the first to know?

  “Assemblyman Howard was going to tell you as soon as he could find you, but he didn’t want to interrupt your dress fitting—I think Shellina threatened murder on anyone who got in the way—and he’s always hated using the comms for important news. I only know because I happened to be standing there when he returned from downtown in a scandalized fluster.”

  Jessamine relaxed slightly, then added, “Wait, why was he the first one to find out about a murder? He’s the Assemblyman of Infrastructure.”

  “I believe he was downtown overseeing a major road repair when the body was found.”

  “Ah, that makes more sense. Has the body been brought back to the Augenspire for autopsy?”

  “Yes, though I don’t know if results are in yet.”

  Jessamine frowned at this disturbing turn of events. Three murders in the span of two weeks was unacceptable, especially since it was being done by a member of her own government in defiance of her policies. After interviewing Risa, she had to agree it sounded like a Major had been after her that night, but she was still no closer to knowing who was behind the attacks and her interview sessions with Parl were not helping.

  “We’ll address that soon enough. First I want to know the real story of what happened the other night at Hera’s when you took ten years off my life by making me think you were dying.”

  Topher stared pensively at his hands for a moment before saying, “I think the voice in my head is connected to the Gifted in some way—to their emblems, at least.”

  “What?” Jessamine asked in shock.

  “The voice—the one that’s been plaguing me for years now—I heard it more clearly than ever when I touched the emblem. It wasn’t just fragments of words and thoughts; it actually used complete sentences.”

  Jessamine’s lips parted in surprise.

  “You said you’ve never touched an emblem directly before, that you’ve always handled them by the chain. Do you think the same thing would happen to any of the Provo-Major who touched an emblem? Is it something to do with the enhancers you have in your brain reacting with the imbued elarium in the emblem?” Her thoughts raced ahead of her and she had to force herself to stop and allow him to answer.

  “I don’t think anyone else would have my problem, unless they heard the voice in the first place. Or—” he suddenly looked uncertain, “—maybe the voice is present in all of our minds but it’s too quiet for anyone else to hear it. Perhaps the emblem acted as an amplifier of some sort and it would allow others to hear it as well.”

  “We can test it easily enough,” Jessamine assured him. “We’ve got a third body to analyze now, and I can easily arrange for one of my other Majors to lift the emblem and check it for signs of tampering. If they collapse on the floor, we’ll know it’s not just you.”

  Topher nodded.

  “When I touched the emblem, it took my mind to another place. It felt like I was falling a long way, and voices were screaming, but then a new world appeared around me. It looked like a primitive version of Elaria—there was ore heaped around everywhere, and I think I saw the Silver River at one point.”

  Jessamine sat across from him, leaning forward in fascination.

  “You think you were seeing…the past?”

  “I don’t know. That’s what it looked like, but I don’t see how it’s possible, and it still doesn’t explain the voice in my head.”

  “You said it talked to you. What did it say?”

  “Something about how it didn’t speak our language very well. It said my mind was more fragile than it expected, and that I wasn’t supposed to forget something but it pushed too hard.”

  Jessamine was staring at him, transfixed.

  “I don’t suppose you remember what you’ve forgotten?”

  “Sadly, no.” Topher sighed and ran a hand through his hair, causing a few strands to stick out at odd angles. “There were spaceships in the visions, though. They were hovering overhead, and in one of the visions they dropped something into the Silver River and it splashed mercury all over everything. Then the vision ended and another replaced it, but it was just me standing in an empty field full of elarium ore with a spaceship overhead, until eventually a man in a strange biohazard suit walked up with a briefcase.”

  “There was someone else there? Why were they in a containment suit? Did the spaceship bring them? Did it actually seem like it could leave the atmosphere?”

  “Well, if it was more than a few hundred years ago then it would have been able to leave the atmosphere, since the Isolation came later. I assume he came from the ship, though I have no idea why he was wearing a biohazard suit. It wasn’t a style of suit I’d ever seen before, but if it was hundreds of years old then it makes sense.”

  “Maybe it was from the very first discovery of Elaria,” Jessamine posited excitedly. “If that was the first person from Earth to touch down, then of course he’d be wearing a suit until he was sure the air was safe to breathe.”

  “True. But then why did he open his briefcase and release a canister?”

  “A canister? What did it do?”

  “Nothing much. It let out a mist, and then the vision ended and I woke up on the floor of my mother’s living room.”

  “This is utterly fascinating, but why in the world are you seeing the past? And what is the voice in your head coming from?”

  “I would love to know. To be honest, I’m a little surprised that you believe me so readily. It sounds completely ridiculous.”

  Jessamine frowned and said, “I was there when you collapsed. You’re not the type to play games with people just to get a laugh, and I trust you not to lie to me.”

  Topher nodded and said, “I was actually hoping you would allow me to try again, since you have an emblem you can loan me.”

  Though she had been half-expecting it, Jessamine still gasped at the idea of handing her most hidden, private possession to Topher and waiting to see if it gave him another seizure.

  “I—do you think it’s safe? I don’t know what it’s doing to your head to pull you out of the present, and I don’t want to cause any long-term damage just for the sake of curiosity.”

  Topher shook his head and said, “I don’t think it’s dangerous, but either way, I need to know. I’ve had this voice in my head for eight years, so whatever was wrong with me has been wrong for a long time now.”

  “Are you saying you’ll do this with or without me?”

  Topher
hesitated for a fraction of a second before saying, “Yes. Though I’d rather have you with me. You’re the only one I can explain all of this to in full, and if I seem like I’m in trouble you can take the emblem away and bring me back.”

  She knew what an enormous display of trust he was putting in her, because Topher absolutely hated looking weak in front of others. Jessamine could tell how badly it rankled to wake up on the floor of his mother’s house with everyone worrying over him. Now he was willing to let her—of all people—see him vulnerable.

  “Alright, but if I think you’re being injured then I’m taking back my emblem and forbidding you from ever venturing into the past again.”

  Topher nodded after a few seconds.

  “Wait here and I’ll get my emblem.” Jessamine stood up and went to her bedroom alone, trying ignore the pounding of her heart as she unlocked and opened the plain wooden box with shaking hands. It felt strangely intimate to carry her emblem out to Topher, as though she was letting him see her naked. She clutched the heart-shaped elarium for strength and returned to the sitting room.

  He eyed the emblem speculatively.

  “Are you using your Gift?”

  Startled, Jessamine said, “No—I don’t think so. Or not intentionally, at least. Why, do I look different?”

  Topher pursed his lips and said, “No, just intense. I thought you might be trying to use your Gift for some reason.”

  Jessamine tried not to flush when she recalled the one time she had used her Gift around Topher, and how he had only seen her.

  “Sorry, it just feels strange to show this to someone after so many years of hiding it in shame.”

  She held it out to him by the chain, watching the heart-shaped emblem swing like a pendulum between them. Topher stared at it for a long moment.

  “Perhaps I’d better lie down this time, so I don’t fall over.” He reclined on the couch, fidgeting uncomfortably in his light armor and trying to get comfortable. After another moment of hesitation, he took the emblem.

  The effect was almost instantaneous. One moment he was speaking normally, and the next he looked to be completely absent from his body, eyes wide and staring at something only he could see. His body was tense and rigid, the muscles in his neck straining and coloring his face red with exertion.

  Jessamine had no idea how she was supposed to know whether he was in trouble or not. She knew he would be upset if she pulled him out of his visions too early, but she was also determined not to sit here and watch him die just because she didn’t want to irritate him.

  She heard his breath catch and hold, like he was struggling to exhale, and Jessamine ripped the emblem away from him and let it fall to the floor beside her, kneeling on the floor beside the couch and resting her hands on his light armor to try and wake him.

  “Topher—are you alright?” She shook him gently.

  He blinked several times before his eyes focused on her face.

  “Jessa—yes, I’m fine.” He pushed himself forward to sit up straight.

  “It looked like you were having a hard time breathing,” she explained. “Your muscles go all rigid when you’re in the visions, and it looked like you were going to suffocate.”

  He blinked and said, “I trust your judgment. It explains why I feel winded even though I’ve just been lying here.”

  “What did you see?” Jessamine asked, still kneeling on the floor beside the couch. She was in no hurry to move away from him.

  “The field full of elarium, like before.” He sighed. “There were all these mounds in the grass, but I couldn’t tell what they were.”

  “Why didn’t you go look?” She couldn’t help but ask the question.

  “My movements aren’t completely free in the visions. I can wander a little within the immediate area, but if I stray too far or try to touch certain things I get locked in place.”

  Jessamine raised her eyebrows and said, “Why is that?”

  “No idea,” Topher shrugged. “I saw the person in the suit come back with the briefcase again. The voice must think this vision is particularly important, but I have no idea why. Like before, he just opened the canister, waited a second, and then left.”

  “Did the voice say anything?”

  “More of the same, mostly. It didn’t mean to make me forget, I have to remember…though there was something new.” Topher brightened suddenly. “I asked why I could hear it more clearly when I was in the visions, and it said I was in its place.”

  “Its place?” Jessamine asked, confused.

  “It’s the way she talks—she doesn’t know our language very well.”

  “It’s a she?”

  Topher’s cheeks reddened in embarrassment.

  “I guess from the way it sounds in my head I’ve always imagined it as female, though I have no idea why.” He shrugged. “Anyway, I think she was telling me I can hear her because I was seeing her thoughts—or her memory, maybe. She pulled me back to her time.”

  “Then she must have been one of the first colonists on Elaria!” Jessamine exclaimed, leaning forward in excitement. “Can you imagine how much there is to learn from one of the original settlers of the planet? I wonder how she found a way to record her memories, and how they got into your head.”

  Topher looked uneasy.

  “I don’t know. I don’t think I’m hearing a recording. She answers my questions sometimes, and how could she possibly know what I was going to ask if she was here hundreds of years before I was even born? It’s almost like she preserved herself somehow…”

  “In the elarium!” Jessamine exclaimed. “It makes sense. No one knows what’s so special about imbued elarium, other than it allows the Gifted to use their powers properly, but what if one of the original colonists found a way to transfer her consciousness into the imbued elarium in some way? Then she could talk to anyone in the future!”

  Topher looked impressed with her theory.

  “But why me? Of all people she could have chosen, she picked a random Provo-Major to talk to, so she could warn me of danger at the Augenspire? Is she a big fan of our current government, or does she just like me in particular?”

  Jessamine frowned pensively.

  “We don’t know that you’re the only person she’s talked to, or even the only one she’s communicating with now. You didn’t tell anyone about the voice in your head until you had to, so it makes sense that other people would keep their mouths shut so they didn’t sound crazy.”

  “But if it needs to be in contact with imbued elarium to work properly, then why pick a Major? I’m one of the people least-likely to come into casual contact with imbued elarium. Even when we’re killing Gifted, we don’t stop and clean up the scene or strip them of their emblems—the Minors and munis take care of it later.”

  Jessamine shrugged.

  “That is odd…”

  “I’ll have to keep trying. It’s the only way to get to the real answers. Whenever I can, I’ll need to go back into the visions until I’ve seen as much as she can show me, and maybe I’ll be able to question her enough to eventually piece together who she is and what she’s trying to tell me.”

  Jessamine nodded.

  “We might not have much time alone in the next couple of weeks, especially if we have to avoid Hera’s house. With my wedding so close, people are coming to the capital in droves and booking rooms, and the Augenspire is littered with more people than ever.”

  Topher grimaced briefly and said, “I know. We’ll find time, either before or after your nuptials have concluded.”

  Jessamine tried to imagine asking Darius to leave the room so she could invite Topher in for a private meeting at night, and how well that would likely go over.

  Hell, they’re my rooms, not his. He’ll be lucky if I even invite him into them.

  “Alright, well, I guess that’s enough for one day. I have an appointment with Harold, it seems, and you shouldn’t do this without a spotter.”

  Topher looked disappointed but d
idn’t argue the point, rising to his feet.

  “I’ve gotten more answers in the last week than I have in the last eight years. I suppose I can wait a while longer.”

  Jessamine smiled and said, “We’ll figure this all out sooner or later. At least you can rest easy knowing you definitely aren’t crazy.”

  Topher chuckled and said, “At least there’s that.” Then, becoming serious once more he added, “You leave first. If it looks clear, knock once and I’ll follow.”

  “And if it isn’t?”

  “I’ll call Hanna up here and have her ward off any spies.”

  Jessamine smiled at the thought of Hanna politely but sternly informing anyone watching her rooms that spying hours end abruptly after lunch and do not resume until six-thirty.

  “Alright then, I’m off.” She opened the door and stepped out into the hall. It was immediately apparent there was no one nearby, so she rapped once on the door and continued towards the elevators without looking back.

  Time to confront another dead man until he tells me who his conspirators are.

  She sighed and punched the ‘down’ button a little harder than necessary.

  15

  Risa Vorhees

  Risa stared at the half-solved equation listlessly, trying and failing to focus on the page in front of her. The Certified Accounting Exams were three weeks from now, and she had been steadily working through the practice exams for almost as long.

  In hindsight, it was a rash decision to sign up for the C.A.E.’s with so little preparation, and she cursed herself for being a fool. Driven by a desperate desire not to be left behind when all of her friends were clearly moving forward with their lives, she had enrolled just before the final deadline for this season’s exam. Now she couldn’t even focus on the practice tests properly.

  Carl is an officer of the Augenspire, Max and Ana are spending all their free time together and Hera is working with Topher and Jessamine on a complete overhaul of Gifted policy.

  And where was Risa in all of this? Still taking classes at the Academy. Still stuck in a mental fog while everyone around her was evolving into something new. Still alone.