Begin Again (Beautiful #2)

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Begin Again (Beautiful #2) Page 9

by Bester, Tamsyn


  “Brody took me to the storeroom and we…” I hesitated, fighting my urge to throw up.

  “You had sex,” Huntley said, finishing my sentence. I was glad that I didn’t have to say it but somehow hearing it from her made it so much worse.

  I nodded, mumbling, “I’m such a fool.”

  Huntley sighed and our eyes met in the mirror. Mine were red and puffy, while hers were clear and strong. I need that, more than anything.

  “No,” she replied, “you’re not. You have a history with him and considering everything you went through with the baby. I’m surprised you’ve managed to keep it together this long.”

  “I can’t go through this with him again,” I cried, “Losing him was hard enough the first time and now he has me tied up in knots. I don’t know whether I’m coming or going when I’m around him and I hate that he still has so much power over me.”

  “You love him,” Huntley stated, “and that will never change, especially after what you’ve lost in the process.”

  Before I could respond, the bathroom door opened and Sienna walked in. Her eyes darted between me and Huntley and her lips curled into a leer. I swallowed hard, feeling uncomfortable. The look in her eyes unsettled me.

  “Let’s go,” Huntley said. I nodded and walked out, hearing Sienna’s snicker disappear with the closing of the door.

  I stopped in my tracks and Huntley came to halt beside me.

  “Oh God,” I whispered, “Do you think she heard us?”

  “I doubt it, and if she did, she’d know better than to say anything to Brody.”

  As we headed back to rejoin the rest of our friends, I couldn’t help the worry that took root in my belly. If Sienna had heard us, it would mean I’d have to tell Brody what happened when he left much sooner than I’d expected. And I just wasn’t ready. I wasn’t sure I’d ever be ready.

  I walked back to our table as if I hadn’t just fucked Demi like a two-dollar hooker in the storeroom of Nicky’s Bar. I was agitated as fuck and now I felt like an absolute asshole. I shouldn’t have done that and somehow I’d managed to cheapen what Demi and I had and would always have. She was here with Jeff, but I couldn’t resist the animalistic urge deep inside me to claim her, mark her with my body and remind her that she would always belong to me. I’d left Sienna at our table, told her I had to take a piss, and grabbed Demi while she was the line for the restroom. She was surprised, and maybe even a little pissed with me, but she hadn’t stopped me. Not once. Instead, her tight little body welcomed me, reminding me just how tempestuous and combustible the chemistry was between us. She was still brewing after our argument last night, that much was obvious, but she did nothing to hide the desire her body felt for mine. It had been a year since we’d last had sex and it was still the most amazing sex I’d ever experienced. Only now I’d somehow tainted it by treating her like the trash I knew she wasn’t.

  It was supposed to be a fun night, a last hoorah for Grayson and Huntley before they got married in two days, but it had somehow turned into a wicked game between Demi and I. I was very aware that she’d been watching me all night and I did nothing to hide the fact that I was doing the same. It had soured my already bad mood, not only watching her with Jeff but also watching her attempt at getting drunk. My ogling caught Sienna’s attention more than once but I didn’t care. Only now, she was trying my patience and I hadn’t had very much to begin with.

  “I’m bored,” she whined when she arrived back at our table. “When can we ditch this shithole?”

  I glared at her and tried to get the tick in my jaw under control. “Feel free to leave, Sienna, but I’m not going anywhere. I’m here for my best friends, and if you’d rather not be selfless enough to suck it up for one night then call a cab.”

  She scowled at me. “I can’t believe you’d put your friends above your girlfriend. I’m miserable and you don’t seem to care at all.”

  I turned to face her and got in her personal space. “Let’s be clear,” I gritted my teeth, “you are not my girlfriend, and they’re not just my friends, they’re my family. If you can’t handle them being such a big part of my life and the maybe it’s time we re-evaluate this thing,” I gestured between us, “with you and me.”

  Sienna straightened her back and her eyes hardened before she replied, “I’d be careful if I were you, Brody. You can lose everything in Chicago with one phone call to my daddy, so choose your moves wisely. I say when we’re over, baby.”

  “Don’t threaten me,” I warned. “It won’t end well. You wouldn’t want your dear old ‘daddy’ to know you’ve fucked half of the board members and threatened them with that information. Extortion is a dangerous game, baby, especially when you have no fucking idea what you’re doing.”

  We stared at each other. It felt like I’d come face-to-face with my biggest mistake and the phrase “hindsight is 20/20” popped into my head. I should’ve seen this coming because I knew Sienna was a manipulative, vindictive bitch, but I was hurting so badly at the time that we’d met that I hadn’t stopped to think it through. Getting involved with my boss’s daughter was probably the second dumbest thing I’d ever done. The first was leaving.

  “I’m leaving,” Sienna bit out. “I hope you will have changed your mind by the time you get back to the hotel. I’ll be ready and waiting for you in bed.”

  She kissed me fast and hard but I held back. After what happened with Demi and I in the storeroom, it felt wrong to kiss Sienna back. I watched Sienna walk away and cursed under my breath. She thought I was going to have sex with her when I got back to the hotel. No way. For the first time the thought repulsed me. I didn’t want to lay a hand on her. I was ruined all over again after being inside Demi.

  Someone tapped me on the shoulder and I spun around. It was Grayson.

  “Everything okay?” he asked.

  “Yeah,” I lied, “all good. What’s up?”

  ‘Huntley isn’t feeling well, so I’m taking her home. Jeff is catching a ride home with us.”

  “What about Demi?” I asked, thinking about her immediately.

  Grayson sighed and brushed his fingers through his hair. “We’re having a slight,” he hesitated, “problem.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Demi is outside, but we can’t let her drive home. She’s had too much to drink. She’s not too happy with us.”

  I’d seen Demi a little over thirty minutes ago. How much more could she have possibly had to drink? I followed Grayson outside to the parking lot where Demi was stumbling all over the place trying to get her keys out of Huntley’s grasp. Jeff was leaning against Grayson’s truck and he looked completely dejected.

  “Shit!” Huntley cursed loudly.

  My head whipped around and I caught sight of Huntley bending down to help Demi off the ground. She’d fallen onto the gravel and scraped her knee. Something about it amused her though. The alcohol must’ve numbed any hurt she might’ve felt. Jesus, how much had she had to drink? I raced over, and took her from Huntley’s arms. I could feel Jeff’s eyes on the back of my head but I ignored it. I had more important shit to deal with.

  “Give me her keys,” I said to Huntley. “I’ll take her home and come fetch her car tomorrow.”

  Huntley looked worried but handed the keys to Demi’s Lexus to me. “Are you okay to drive?”

  “Yes,” I replied, “I haven’t had a drop of alcohol. I promise, nothing will happen to her. Don’t you trust me?”

  Huntley looked at a semi-conscious Demi tucked into my side and the back at me. The words that came next shouldn’t have surprised me, but they did. They knocked me off kilter. “No, Brody, I don’t.”

  Huntley kissed Demi’s forehead and made her way to Grayson’s truck. Grayson helped me get Demi into my truck and I watched the drive away before taking Demi home. It was silent in the cab of my truck. Demi was leaning against the window, her eyes closed.

  “Why are you helping me?” she mumbled.

  “Because you’re too dru
nk to help yourself,” I replied angrily. She had been completely irresponsible and it wasn’t like her to get drunk, let alone consider driving home in her condition. What was going on with her? Was it my fault she’d had the need to get drunk off her ass? She didn’t speak again until I stopped outside her house and walked around the passenger side to help her out.

  “Don’t touch me,” she slurred, barely making it out the truck on her own.

  “Stop being so Goddamn stubborn and let me help you,” I bit back. I shut the truck door and picked her up, cradling her against my chest. “Did you enjoy it?” Her words were muffled against my shirt and I wasn’t sure I’d heard her correctly. “Enjoy what?” I asked. I managed to unlock her front door without dropping her and walked inside. It was dark, save for the moonlight cascading through the glass doors that lead to her porch. A puppy started yapping, and Demi squirmed out of my arms. Her legs buckled beneath her but I grabbed her waist before she hit the floor. “Sshh, Coco,” she hushed, making a grab for the little ball moving around our feet. “Go sleep.” The puppy whined and traipsed off to its bed in the living room.

  “You can leave now,” Demi said, dismissing me. “I can manage without you.”

  Her words wounded me and I suspected that she’d meant them to, like what she really meant was that for the last year, she’d been managing just fine without me. I didn’t want that to be true, but it was unfair of me to expect her to have spent the time wishing I hadn’t left.

  “I’m taking you to bed,” I replied, helping her down the hallway to what I thought was her bedroom.

  She laughed, but the sound was empty and cruel. “You already did that once tonight, what makes you think I’ll let you fuck me like a whore again?”

  I winced. I couldn’t deny that I’d acted like a complete asshole and now hearing Demi say that I’d done that to her made it so much worse.

  “Do you fuck Sienna like that too? Or did you save it for me? Your piece of ass from home.” She laughed again as I sat her down on her bed and I hated myself more than I ever thought possible. I found the switch for the lamp next to Demi’s bed and turned it on just in time to see her fall backwards onto the bed. I bent down and slipped her heels off, trying not think about all the times we’d had sex while she was wearing nothing but those heels.

  “I miss you,” she whispered. My head shot up but her eyes were closed and I swore she’d fallen asleep. I stood up and helped her sit up right so that I could take off her dress. I unzipped it and slid it down over her shoulders to her waist. I laid her down again and continued sliding the dress down, over her hips and down her legs. She was wearing nothing but her bra, since I’d ripped off her underwear earlier, and I’m sure that if she weren’t drunk she would have tried to cover herself up. Instead of leaving her like that, I opened her drawers until I found her pajamas and dressed her in her favorite lime green sleep shorts and matching tank top. I shifted her so that her head rested on her pillow and just as I was about to pull her duvet over her, her eyes flew open. Their lucidity, despite her state of intoxication, pierced my soul and left me bare for the world to see.

  “I wish I could hate you,” she said quietly. “But even with a broken heart, I still love you.”

  She climbed under her duvet and turned away from me, her breathing evening out as she fell asleep. I bent down and kissed her head, whispering, “I love you. Always.”

  I stared at her for a few minutes, struck speechless by her words, and rubbed my face. She was a mess, that much was obvious, and it was my fault. I turned to switch the light off when my eyes fell to a folded piece of paper. I picked it up and opened it. It took me a minute to figure out what it was. An ultrasound. Of a baby. What the fuck? Was she pregnant? I swallowed hard, feeling my body stiffen in shock. It wasn’t mine so that meant it was…Jeff’s. Demi had lied to me. Not only was she seeing Jeff but she might have been carrying his child. I felt sick. I dropped the photo and left. Nothing hurt more than thinking about her having another man’s baby. It should be my baby she’s carrying.

  When I reached my truck, I took a few deep breaths but they didn’t alleviate the pain coursing through every fiber in my body. Instead, I reared my fist back and punched the driver’s side window of my truck. I watched the glass shatter and blood start running down my hand. It wasn’t enough though. I deserved much worse. Then again, it couldn’t get any worse than finding out the love of your life was expecting a child that wasn’t yours.

  I woke up when my head started pounding. My eyelids were too heavy and it felt like I’d swallowed a box of lit cigarettes. A throat cleared and my bed dipped. With great difficulty, I cracked an eye open and found Huntley sitting next to me.

  “What time is it?” I asked. I winced when my voice was unrecognizable, even to my own ears.

  “A little after eleven,” she replied. “How are you feeling?”

  I groaned and lifted up onto my elbows, my brows furrowing when I noticed my state of semi-undress. I was wearing my sleep shorts and tank top, and had no recollection of how I’d gotten that way. I started looking around frantically, wondering if I’d come home with someone last night. Huntley saw the horror in my eyes and calmed me with a hand on my shoulder.

  “Relax,” she said quietly, “No one else is here.” She leaned over and took a glass of orange juice and some Tylenol from the nightstand. “Drink this, you’ll feel better.”

  I murmured “thank you” and swallowed the orange juice and Tylenol in one gulp.

  Huntley watched me and I noticed her demeanor was more subdued than normal. I leaned back against my headboard. “Are you okay?” I asked.

  She hesitated and then replied, “I’ll run your shower, and then we’ll talk, okay?”

  She stood up but I grabbed her arm and stopped her. “What’s wrong? Is this about last night?” I remembered bits and pieces about the night before but the details were still a little fuzzy.

  Huntley sat back down next to me, and I saw her eyes had grown wet.

  “You’re starting to freak me out,” I said, my throat growing thick with concern.

  “I have something tell you.” She swiped a tear that fell down her cheek and looked up to meet my worried gaze.

  “Spit it out girly, I can’t read your mind.”

  “I… I…” she paused and took a moment to compose herself, “This is harder than I thought it would be.”

  She needed some time and I’d give it to her. So I waited, and when she was ready to tell me what made her heart so heavy, I’d listen.

  “I’m…I’m…I’m pregnant.” She burst into tears and I had no idea what to say. The feelings running through me were nothing short of a clusterfuck.

  “That’s amazing!” I said. My enthusiasm was fake and I prayed that she couldn’t hear it in my voice. I chalked it down to a killer hangover and nothing more, despite the menacing feeling unraveling in the pit of my heart and soul. I couldn’t fall apart over this. Not in front of Huntley. “Why are you crying? You’re supposed to be happy!”

  “I am,” she cried, her face red and puffy, “but I was so terrified to tell you.”

  “Why?”

  “B-because I don’t want you to hate me!”

  I stared at my best friend, watching the way her lip trembled. She had been too afraid to share her news with me out of fear that I’d hate her. I could never hate her. I loved her too much.

  I scooted closer and took hold of her shaking hand. “I could never hate you,” I swallowed the emotion in my throat, “and I’m sorry that you were too afraid to share this with me. I’m happy for you Huntley, I really am. Does Grayson know?”

  She shook her head. “No, I only saw the doctor yesterday to confirm it. I wanted you to be the first to know.”

  I squeezed her hand. “How far along are you?”

  She gave me a genuine half-smile. “Only ten weeks.”

  “I’m sure Grayson will be thrilled.”

  “I know he will,” she laughed lightly. “He wanted u
s to have another baby, little did we know I was already pregnant when we decided to start trying. I didn’t think it would be so easy to fall pregnant a second time.”

  “It was meant to be,” I whispered, feeling my own eyes burning. I wanted Huntley to think it was because I was happy for her, but it was really because a small part of me died inside. Did that make me a bad friend? Probably.

  Huntley wiped her face and gave me a hug. Keep it together, I told myself.

  “I love you, Demi, so much. You’re my best friend.”

  “I know,” I replied quietly, trying not to allow my emotions to get the better of me, “I love you too.”

  We pulled away and Huntley looked at me sheepishly. “Are you okay after last night?” she asked. It was my turn to look sheepish.

  “I don’t know,” I replied, “I don’t remember much. Care to fill me in?”

  “You had a little too much to drink,” she explained. “And Brody had to drive you home.”

  My brows furrowed in confusion. “Brody?”

  Huntley nodded and I saw the same question in her eyes that was burning itself into my mind: Why would he do that? Because he still cares.

  Thinking about him triggered memories about the night before and as they flashed in my mind, my body went rigid and my eyes widened. The night started off drama-free for the most part and ended with…Brody and I…having sex…in the storeroom.

  “What is it?” Huntley asked. I’d obviously done a bad job of hiding my shock.

  I shook my head, plastering on a fake smile. “It’s nothing. I’m fine.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes. It’s all fine.”

  I could tell she didn’t believe me but it wasn’t in her to push for information.

  “Okay,” she acquiesced, standing up with a heavy sigh. “I have to leave, but I’ll see you at the rehearsal dinner tonight?”

  I nodded. “Yeah, I’ll see you there.”

 

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