Finding You (Pack Bardot Book 1)

by M. K. Harper

  “I want you to forever be Linden Elodie Bardot. To have a name that will always be yours and to not have to change it ever again. I want to build a home with you. To have babies with you. I want the honor of protecting you for the rest of our lives. I know I’ll get all of that by bonding with you, but I’m a selfish bastard and I want you to be mine in every way possible, Linny. It doesn’t have to be next month, or even next year. Just as long as you’ll marry me. Please say you’ll marry me, baby?” Dax is looking at me with so much hope and just the smallest hint of fear. Like an old movie reel, I can see the life Dax has envisioned for us play out in my head. A house. Kids. Their Nona and Bear watching out for them so we can steal a few minutes away to be young and in love again. I want it. I want it so bad it’s a physical ache inside of me, begging to be filled with all those promises of a beautiful and happy life. Dax’s eyes flash with worry, his eyes darting back and forth between mine. I have no idea how long I’ve been quiet, lost in the daydream of what awaits us, but it’s obviously been too long. My poor Wolf-Man looks like he’s about to lose his shit.

  “Yes. Today, tomorrow...I’ll marry you anytime, anywhere Daxton Elias Bardot,” I kneel down with him, my hands clasping around his neck. “I love you. I’m yours Dax, now and forever.” A strangled sound comes out of him before he wraps a hand around the back of head and draws me in. His lips brush mine in the softest kiss, but it spreads through me like a shockwave. Every nerve ending in my body ignites from the small touch. My hands tighten in his hair as his lips move across mine, his tongue tracing the seam and seeking entrance. I part them on a gasp that Dax quickly swallows up. Our tongues meet and dance like they’ve done it a thousand times before, which seems impossible considering both of us are woefully incompetent in this department. My heart swells, my connection to Dax growing even stronger as we explore this new part of each other. He pulls back first, albeit reluctantly. Both of us are breathing raggedly. It’s good to know he’s just as effected as I am. Our foreheads meet, bearing each others weight as the world rights itself.

  “Best first kiss ever,” I whisper.

  “First and last, baby. No one else will ever have your kisses. I know I said I wouldn’t do that until your birthday, but a man only has so much restraint,” his voice vibrates with possession. That shouldn’t turn me on, but it really does. “Let me see your hand,” he instructs, opening the box that has somehow managed to stay in his hand. “It’s not anything fancy. I knew you’d lose your shit if I went out and spent thousands on a huge diamond, so I designed this instead.” His eyes hold that twinge of uncertainty that I hate. I finally look down at the ring he’s sliding on my finger and tears pool in my eyes instantly.

  “You designed this?” I’m floored. I knew I’d love it no matter what for the simple fact of what it stands for, but holy shit...it’s gorgeous. The ring itself is a gunmetal finish. The center is a round marble like stone that’s swirled with black, blues and deep purples. Little glitter flecks make it shine when twisted the right way. It’s obvious it’s the moon, and on both sides, two wolf heads are howling. The design is so detailed that its actually a very dainty ring. The best part though...the eyes of the wolves are our real eye colors. Tiny blue and green stones to signify each of us. The thought and time he put into this ring has my tears falling free and trickling down my cheeks.

  “You like it?” he questions shyly.

  “I love it,” I tell him. I frame his face with my hands and smack a big kiss on his lips. My tears and snot included. He laughs and pulls us both up.

  “Come on. I’ve got one more surprise,” he starts pulling me back down the hill.

  “Oh, hell no,” I grumble. “The only way I’m getting back down is if you plan to carry me, Dax. My feet hurt and I’m starving.” I poke out my bottom lip, hoping he’ll take pity on me.

  “You’re so cute when you’re dramatic,” he laughs when I swat at him. “Hop on.” He turns around and I climb on his back like I’m a fucking three year old, but my feet couldn’t be happier.

  “Love your shirt, by the way. Who the fuck would want someone who sparkles?!” I nearly fall off Dax, my laughter echoing through the trees as he makes his way down.

  Chapter 27

  Halfway down, Dax decides to test out his ability to carry me while also running. He even hopped over a tree that was down, causing me to squeal and pinch his sides.

  “You’re going to drop me you, thrill junkie!” I shriek through my laughter.

  “Never,” he declares. His feet hit the bottom of the cliff, but instead of stopping, he bolts across the field towards his parents house. I’m laughing so hard I can barely breathe.

  “Put me down before I start yelling ‘giddy up horsey’!” I lower my hand to give him an epic titty twister but he just groans huskily. Well, that backfired.

  “You’re definitely gonna be riding something...” he says under his breath but I hear him. The dirty innuendo nearly makes me fall to my death. Dax’s throaty laugh followed by his arm under my ass is what saves me. We round the back of the house and I’m suddenly accosted with screams and hollers.

  “Happy Birthday!” Dozens of people yell at once. I scream back, scared shitless by the sudden mob before me. Dax steadies me and slides me around his front, my legs still wrapped around him like a spider monkey.

  “Happy Birthday, baby,” his words cut through the noise and I lift my head from where I’ve buried it against his neck. I peek behind me and spot our families, but I have no clue who everyone else is.

  “Who are all these people?” I ask.

  “Pack members. They’ve been dying to meet you. It’s okay, I’ll be right here with you the entire time.” His hands squeeze my ass. I nod, still a little dazed.

  “Itty Bitty!” Carder roars over the crowd and makes his way towards us. Dax sits me down on solid ground as a hush falls over the crowd, every eye cast down as their Alpha moves through them.

  “Papa Wolf!” I squeal and throw myself in his arms, knowing damn well he’ll catch me. His laugh echoes around us as he scoops me up and spins us around. I catch the eyes of several shocked faces as they whirl by.

  “Pack Bardot!” he yells for everyone’s attention. “This beautiful little thing is my son’s mate. Tomorrow they’ll be bonded, but she’s been family since she walked into our lives and stole all of our hearts. Today, we celebrate her eighteenth birthday because tomorrow we’ll be celebrating the bonding of our your future pack leaders. Please join me in helpin’ our girl feel welcome!” He raises a beer to the crowd and they all join in, when a familiar tiny tornado comes surging through the mass of bodies.

  “Move you big oaf,” I hear his sweet voice just as he does his best to shove a giant ass man out of the way. The guy side steps Caulder, surprise etched on his face when he sees who the annoying little gnat is that’s been poking at him.

  “Lindy!” My Little Tyrant screeches as soon as a path opens up. I take off in a sprint, wrapping him in my arms and kissing him all over his sweet-as-pie face. He giggles and squirms but I don’t let up.

  “I could just eat you up, LT!” I blow a raspberry against his neck. It takes a second for me to realize that everyone has gone silent. I turn in a circle, taking in all the shocked faces. I look at Dax, then Carder and Beatrix, who are all looking back at me in wonder. I have no clue why everyone is staring at us like some freak show.

  “I never come out when the pack is here,” Caulder shrugs like it’s no big deal. “You were worth coming for, though.” My heart can’t take much more sweetness today, the damn thing might just give out. I snuggle him closer, loving the feel of his tiny hands squeezing me back.

  “Whatcha say we go raid the food table? Maybe swipe a cupcake or five?” I grin at him mischievously. He claps his hands together and throws his head back, doing his best villain laugh. With that, we set off on a mission. Five minutes later, we’re seated under a table with three plates stacked full of food. I could tell the crowd of people was starting to
get to Caulder, so thinking on my feet, I snagged a lantern that was hanging from a nearby tree and we climbed under one of the tables, the cloth covering it the perfect thing to hide us from all the curious eyes.

  “Alright, where should we start,” I eye the plates before us. “Hot dogs and hamburgers or cake and cookies?” I glance at my little dude, his careful gaze pinging back and forth.

  “We should probably eat real food first,” he decides.

  “But that cupcake is red velvet,” I whine.

  “You’ll get a tummy ache, Lindy,” he states firmly, shoving a hamburger in my face. This kid. I smile and accept the food, finishing it in just a few bites.

  “Now can I have my cupcake?” I say around a mouth full of hamburger. Caulder gags and I chuckle at his dramatics. I swipe some frosting from a cupcake and smear it all over his adorable face. Caulder gasps and stares at me in stunned outrage.

  “That is an act of war, Lindy,” the Little Tyrant declares smugly. A second later, he’s wiped buttercream all over me. I up the ante and smack and entire cupcake in his face. We’re peeled over, laughing hysterically when someone clears their throat. We both look up to see Beatrix, Carder, Mom and Dax looking at us from where the table cloth is being held up. Beatrix arches a brow at us, and we both crawl out of our hidey-hole to face the music. We stand, holding our heads high as if we don’t have cake and frosting smeared all over us. Beatrix folds her arms across her chest and stares, waiting for an explanation I assume.

  “He started it,” I deadpan at the same time Caulder says, “she started it,” pointing at me to further drive home him throwing me under the bus.

  “Snitch,” I mouth at him. Dax snorts somewhere off in the background. I watch Beatrix press her lips together repeatedly so I know she’s fighting hard not to laugh.

  “You just had a bath, Caulder James. I guess you’re going to bed a sticky mess,” she tries and fails to look stern. “It’s time to say goodnight, it’s past your bedtime.” He huffs, but doesn’t argue. He turns to me and yanks on my shirt so that he can pull me down and wrap his arms around me. I melt into a puddle when he kisses my cheek.

  “Love you, Lindy.” That sweet voice stabs my heart.

  “I love you too, Caulder,” my voice is strained with emotion. Everyone’s eyes tear up at the interaction between us.

  “Better watch your back, soulmate,” Caulder winks, or tries to wink but it’s more of a blink, as he walks to the house with Beatrix. We all just shake our heads. Dax snags my hand and brings a napkin up to clean my face off.

  “Honestly, how bad do I look?” I ask.

  “Good enough to eat,” his eyes darken with hunger. He dips his head and swipes his tongue across my bottom lip. I stand there, stunned into a statue. “Mmmm, delicious,” he licks his lips, savoring the frosting he just stole from me.

  “Good Lord, what’d I say about breakin’ her, Dax?” Carder snaps from behind me. I flinch, embarrassed that he’s once again witnessed his son turn me into a mute. Probably drooling a bit too. Carder’s arm slings over my shoulder, tucking me against his side.

  “Let’s go introduce you to some pack members, Itty Bitty.” He’s pulling me along before I can protest, Dax taking up my other side. We talk with a few people, all of them very nice, before we stop at a table with Chevy seated cozily next to some guy. His eyes connect with mine, trying to relay some sort of secret message. I hear it, loud and clear - don’t embarrass me - and I give zero fucks. I smile, a wicked, calculated smile, before pulling out the chair across from them and taking a seat.

  “Hi, I’m Linden. You are?” I extend my hand towards the new guy. He looks at it warily, then looks at Dax. I roll my eyes and drop my hand.

  “I’m Finn?” he answers like it’s a question.

  “And what, Dear Finneaus, are your intentions with my friend here,” I wave a hand at Chev. His face blanches and he curses.

  “Um...,” Finn looks around, slightly freaked out. Dax and Carder just look amused, watching with rapt attention.

  “I could tell you a few stories about Chevy? Maybe that one time when....” Chev cuts me off. I was just winging it anyway, I don’t really know any embarrassing stories but I sure as shit was willing to make one up. Tit-for-Tat and stuff.

  “That’ll be enough out of you, Lucifer,” he growls, almost sounding right at home with our current company. “Oh Daxton,” he purrs, a sickly sweet smile on his lips that screams of retaliation. “I feel it’s only right to tell you that there’s something you don’t know about your sweet little Linny.” Dax steps forward, suddenly a lot more interested but also looking slightly alarmed. Oh, fuckity fuck. I have no earthly idea what’s going to fly out of Chevy’s mouth, so I do the only thing I can. Brace for impact.

  “Your girl was actually Team Edward,” he delivers the blow with a huge grin splitting his face. Dax whirls on me, bone deep betrayal marring his handsome face.

  “Linny!” he gasps. “How could you?” I can tell he’s doing his damndest not to crack up.

  “It wasn’t about Edward, I just loved glitter!” I wail, tossing back that bit Dax said earlier. Carder is rolling, causing both of us to break and join him. Several people stare at us like we’ve lost a few nuts and bolts from our hardware store. Unfortunately, our raucous laughter has garnered the attention of the last person I want to see, and at my birthday party no less. Allana is flanked by a man and woman, who I’m guessing are her parents, traipsing our way. I steel my spine, not willing to let her ruin what has probably been the best day of my life. Dax notices the shift immediately, his eyes following mine to see what has me on edge. He pulls me against him right as they stop in front of us and Carder’s imposing form takes up my other side.

  “Alpha,” the man greets, all three of them baring their necks to the side. I have no idea what that’s all about, but I’ve noticed people doing it all night. “We thought we’d come meet the girl who stole away our daughter’s first and only love.” He says it in a polite voice, but you can’t miss the undertone. Or the way he emphasizes girl.

  “Such is the way of mates, Barron,” Carder smiles back. “That’s why you shouldn’t fall for someone outside of your mate bond, I know my son didn’t.” Shots fucking fired. I want to grin so bad my face hurts from restraining it. The ticking of Barron’s jaw doesn’t go unnoticed, the underhanded comment clearly pissing him off. Allana looks like she wants to murder me where I stand.

  “Now, Carder,” he lays back on the niceness. “We both know our children are well matched to produce a strong bloodline. The same cannot be said for her.” He glances in my direction, his distaste for me a little more evident.

  “Since when do we care about strong bloodlines and the ratio of Lycanthropy someone holds?” Carder takes a menacing step forward. “Never. Pack Bardot does not and will not ever forsake mate bonds in order to produce some ill perceived idea of a stronger wolf. We respect what fate chooses for us. You understand?” The two stare each other down before Barron finally yields and bares his neck once again.

  “Of course, Alpha,” he laughs the whole thing off. I don’t miss the way his eyes spark with envy and hatred when he addresses Carder as Alpha.

  “Can I speak with you, Dax? In private? It’s really important and it’ll just take a minute,” Allana turns into that sweet and broken-hearted little girl once more. I can see right through it. My hand tightens around Dax’s but I loosen it immediately, wanting him to make his own decision.

  “Please,” she whispers, tears building in her eyes. For fucks sake. Someone get this girl an Emmy. I can tell the second Dax relents to her wishes. His body deflates, and as much as I want to feel upset from his choice, I can’t. He’s too good of a person to watch someone hurt, especially because of him. He turns to me, pleading with me to understand.

  “I’ll be right back, I promise,” he kisses the tip of my nose. I nod, not trusting my voice. While I understand, it doesn’t mean I have to be happy about it. I watch, with grim satisfaction
, as Allana tries to link her arm with Dax’s and he pushes it away. My eyes follow them until they fade into the shadows of the tree line and I can no longer see them.

  “Well, this certainly has been an underwhelming party. Maybe it’ll liven up soon,” Barron grins behind the mouth of his beer as he takes a sip. Every warning signal I have flares to life. And that’s saying something because I don’t have many. I’m usually not even aware that I’m in danger until it’s too late. See Poor Choices, Section-2319: Linden walks into the woods alone to search for friend and gets impaled by wolf claws, for reference. My stomach drops, an eery since of foreboding blanketing the suddenly thick air. As if sensing the same thing, Carder stiffens beside me. His hand reaches out, pulling me behind him.

  “Is that so?” Carder asks in a quiet, deadly voice. Dumbass Barron just continues to smile.

  “Where ever is that wife of yours, Carder,” Allana’s mom purrs. Ah...Tits McGee Senior. The bitch is flirting so hard even I’m offended. The urge to punch her in the face on behalf of Beatrix is strong. Before Carder can reply, a roar of engines can be heard. Everyone turns to see what’s happening when spotlights flare to life, momentarily blinding us all. It’s that small advantage that sends everything into utter chaos. By the time I’ve blinked through the brightness and can make out my own hand, masked men are running through the crowd. Women and children start to scream, wolves shift, and all I can do is stand there, panic freezing me. The noise around me dulls and all I can hear is the sound of my own heart racing and my erratic breathing. All around me, people are fighting. Where is Dax? That’s all I can think about. Something hard slams into my side, bringing me up close and personal with the ground. The air leaves me in a whoosh. On the bright side, I’m fucking alert now. A guy wearing a Donald Trump mask looks over me, ropes dangling from his hand. Oh, fuck that. Without giving it much thought, I bring my leg bag and kick his knee as hard as I can. The sickening crunch of bone is followed by a shrill scream. I gag. His kneecap is literally inverted.