Nobody's Perfect

by Steve Kirby

  “He’s not been out tonight or this week so I don’t know what the complaint is but I do know it’s got nothing to do with Jack.”

  “No but his mates Scott and Brandon from the council estate have been down here causing their trouble.”

  “So what’s that got to do with Jack?”

  ”Guilty by association, they are his friends they come down to see him Jack is seen as the leader of this group of people so he is just as guilty as if he was with them.”

  “That’s not right.”

  “Right or not that’s the way it is. Anyway we haven’t time to spend coming down here every day we have better things to do with our police officers.”

  Sam’s anger was beginning to grow, his frustration boiled over, he rounded on the Sergeant.

  “So go round next door and tell him to stop wasting police time on stupid things.”

  “That’s it; to you it may seem like stupid things but to Mr and Mrs Wilson your son’s behaviour is making their lives a misery, Mrs Wilson hasn’t slept in weeks terrified that your son and his mates are going to do something to their house or property.”

  “That’s stupid.” Sam said.

  ” He’s in bed every night for 9-30, look the guy is not right in the head, I don’t know what his problem is with Jack but I’m willing to sit down with them both and sort it out.”

  ”You mean you are prepared to go to mediation to try and sort this out?”

  “Defiantly.”

  “That’s good well I will pass your request for mediation on, you see we have spent enough time and resources on this matter so it there is no improvement in your sons behaviour we will have no alternative than to pass the matter on to the Kirklees Anti-Social Behaviour Unit.

  As for you young man the next time you do anything to cause trouble for any of your neighbours you will be arrested and believe me you won’t like being in my cells, do you hear me!” Sergeant Walker walked forward and loomed over Jack who looked up at him his eyes wide like a rabbits caught in the headlights of the car about to squash him.

  Sam showed Sergeant Walker out, when he got back to the kitchen Jack had disappeared upstairs.

  “Where is he?”He said turning to go back out of the door.

  Rebecca blocked his path.

  “Leave it for tonight Sam I don’t know about him but I have had enough of all this crap every day we don’t need it.”

  “I know Becks I’m not as angry with him as much as the way it seems that that poor little sod can get reported even when he’s not out. I don’t agree with that guilty by association rubbish, him next doors just being a bully and a prat.”

  “Yes but what are we going to do Sam?”

  “Just ignore him he’ll get fed up ringing the police or they will see he’s just victimising Jack and stop him, or what I’d really like to do is go round there and smack the bastard.”

  “Well that’ll help wont it you getting arrested don’t talk stupid Sam.”

  “Your right as always but we need to do something to keep Jack out of trouble.”

  “Like what?” Rebecca asked looking out of the window.

  “How about getting him a puppy to look after, you know give him some responsibility for something.”

  Rebecca called Jack down, five minutes later jack slunk into the kitchen.

  “If you’ve called me down to have another go at me I’m not interested.”

  “No, we’re not going to have a go at you, no me and your mother have been talking, we wondered if you would like a puppy to look after, he would be your responsibility, you know to take for walks and things, eh? What do think?” Jacks face lit up both Sam and Rebecca hadn’t seen Jack this happy in weeks.

  “Oh wow yes! I would love that, when are we getting it, ho wow my own puppy.” Jack ran and jumped into his mother’s arms.

  “My very own puppy thanks Mum oh! And Dad I promise I’ll be good.” Rebecca looked at Sam.

  “I’ve thought about it for a bit and I think an older dog would be better you know one that is house trained and has got out of the chewing the furniture stage, you know something about a year old how’s that sound Jack?”

  “A year? Ok then but no more I don’t want an old dog that just wants to lay in front of the fire all day and sleep.”

  Sam laughed shaking his head.

  “Ha Ha no Jack no more than a year old I promise, right we’ll go to the Dogs trust in Leeds on Saturday alright?” Jack looked a bit dejected.

  “It’s only Wednesday. Can’t we go tomorrow?”

  Sam shook his head laughing.

  “Saturday will come soon enough Jack but tomorrow you can come shopping with us and get a bowl a lead and other bits and pieces for it if you want?”

  “Cool yah, can I go and tell Lizzie?” Rebecca gave him a peck on the cheek and rubbed his head.

  “Sure. Don’t forget we are having a barbecue on Saturday afternoon for Stuart’s birthday, you and your sister need to get him a card.”

  Jack shot off upstairs singing at the top of his voice.

  “I’m getting a puppy! I’m getting a puppy! And you’re not Lizzy ha ha ha.”

  Rebecca sat down at the table and put her head in her hands.

  “I’m fed up with this Sam he’s ruining everything with his petty stupid ways, I’m going to have a word with him we can’t go on like this.” Sam walked over to her and put his arm around her shoulder.

  “Do you want me to come with you?”

  “Better not Sam I know what you’re like we don’t want you arresting do we?”Rebecca went out of the front door just as Colin was coming out of his garage.

  “Colin can I have a word please?”

  “If you’ve come to have a go at me the police have told me to ring them if I get any trouble or threats from you or your husband.”

  “I’m not here to threaten you or cause trouble, I just want to say this is silly now, cant we sort this out like adults, I don’t know what the problem is with you and Jack but it’s doing none of us any good so cant we get together and sort it once and for all please?”

  Colin rubbed his chin a sickly smile on his face.

  “Well Rachel’s going to her mothers with Sally and George this weekend.”

  Rebecca nodded and held up her hand in acknowledgement.

  “Well if this weekend’s not convenient...” Colin held up his hand to stop her.

  “No, No What I meant was Rachel is going to her mothers with the children, so, if you want to bob around I can open a bottle of wine and if you’re nice to me... Well I may stop ringing the police.”

  Rebecca stood frozen to the spot; she couldn’t believe what she had just heard.

  “What! I don’t believe you, you slimy dirty bastard! I’ve a good mind to go and tell Sam what you’ve just said and let him kick your arse.”

  “Yes but you won’t will you.” Colin said smirking.

  “Because if he lay’s one finger on me I’ll have him arrested. Anyway you think about it.” Colin went in his house laughing.

  Rebecca turned and marched into her house her eyes filling with tears; she started to go upstairs Sam came out of the kitchen in time to see his wife’s face.

  “Becky? What’s the matter love? Has that little shit upset you? Because I swear to God I’ll kill that bastard if he has.”

  “No Sam forget it, look let’s just get on with our lives and forget them next door they are not worth it.”

  Rebecca held out her arms Sam walked forwards and gave her a hug.

  “Ok babes well forget them, for now.”

  Chapter 12

  The dog trust is a clinical sterile smelling place the dogs are all behind glass windows looking sad and dejected.

  “Eight Weeks!” Sam said slamming his car door.

  “Eight weeks to get a dog, are they having a laugh? You could adopt a child in less time than that.”

  Rebecca closed her door and put her seatbelt on.

  “As the girl explained Sam they
have to do checks first.”

  “Yah checks right, you mean they come around our house checking under our beds and rooting through our cupboards, wouldn’t surprise me if they didn’t check my computer to make sure I haven’t been downloading any doggie pictures.

  They go on television asking us to” adopt a rescue dog” then they have you jumping through hoops to get one, well they have just wasted three hours of my life.” Rebecca looked at Sam and cocked her head to one side nodding knowingly.

  “Well we won’t be getting one from here now will we thanks to you telling her you could breed a dog faster than get one from here, That went down well I DONT think.” Sam looked in the rear view mirror.

  “Sorry Jack mate looks like we aren’t getting you a dog this week.” Jack smiled and nodded his head.

  “Tell you what you two, how about we call at Asda and get you some sweets on the way home?” The cheer from the back seat said yes.

  When they got to Asda Sam parked next to a familiar looking 4x4 the owner was loading his shopping into the boot when Sam got out of the car.

  “Hey up Jonny lad how’s it going?” Jonny looked up a bit startled at hearing his name.

  “Sam well what do you know, I haven’t seen you since yesterday at work, how you been?”

  “Ha Ha a bit peed off to tell you the truth, we’ve just been to that dogs trust place.”

  “The one near Leeds?” Jonny asked.

  “Yah that’s the one well I promised Jack a dog but do you know how long it takes to get one from there?” Rebecca came round from her side of the car.

  “Whoa Sam I’m not living through you going off on one again, I’m taking these two for some sweets, I’ll see you in there, OK?” Sam waved his hand towards her.

  “Yah right you go on then, Eight weeks! Jonny. Eight bloody weeks to get a dog, can you believe that?”Jonny shut his boot and turned nodding his head a thoughtful look on his face.

  “Well if you don’t want a puppy, my mate’s getting rid of his dog, his wife’s just discovered she’s allergic to dog hair’s, told him he should get rid of her, It’s a lovely dog black Labrador about a year old I think. Are you interested?”

  Sam’s face lit up like a child at Christmas.

  “Yes! Please Jonny mate, you couldn’t give him a ring to see if he’s still got it could you?”

  Half an hour later Jack was the proud owner of an eight month old black Labrador bitch called Roxy.

  ***

  Sam was looking out of the upstairs lounge window; he began to laugh as he turned to Rebecca who was sat reading.

  ” Just look at Jack he’s having the time of his life with that dog, He’s on his skateboard and Roxy is pulling him up and down the millennium way, listen to him laughing.

  Getting him that dog was the best idea I’ve had in a long time.”

  “Yah if you say so Sam.” Rebecca says not looking up from her book.

  “At least he’s keeping out of trouble.”

  The following day Sam came home first, Sam noticed the card on the mat as he opened the door he picked it up and read it as he walked into the kitchen. The front door opened and Rebecca came in.

  “Hi darling, what have you got there then?” Sam waved the card in front of him.

  ”I don’t believe it!” Sam said out loud shaking his head.

  “Not even a week! Not even a bloody week have we had that dog and he’s reported us to the dog warden, says he’s had a report of our dog fouling on the millennium way.”

  Rebecca took the card off him.

  “Calm down Sam, you don’t know it’s him it doesn’t say who’s reported it.”

  “It’s him alright I tell you something he’s really starting to piss me off now big time. I’ve a good mind to go round there and shit in his garden then rub his fat fucking face in it.”

  “Yah like that’ll help wont it? Look you’ve been warned if you touch him you’ll be arrested, do you want that Sam?” Sam let out a deep sigh and shook his head.

  “Right there’s a phone number give him a ring and sort it out, I know whoever takes her out always cleans up after her we’ll check with Jack when he comes home see if he forgot any time. Where is Jack by the way? He and Lizzy should have been home before us.”

  Ten minutes later the front door opened Jack and Lizzy came in, Jack ran straight upstairs, Lizzy came in the kitchen looking flushed and upset.

  “What’s the matter sweetheart?” Becky asked putting her arm around Lizzy’s shoulders.

  “Him next door has just had a right go at Jack, He’s told him he’s reported Roxy and he’s going to get him put down.” Lizzy began to cry, he can’t do that can he Mum.

  Sam turned to Rebecca his face set with anger.

  “Well that answers the question of who reported us then doesn’t it? Right that’s it I’ve had enough of that bastard! I’m going to sort this out once and for all.” Sam marched out of the kitchen, Becky didn’t try to stop him she was just as angry.

  Sam wrenched open the front door, Colin was sweeping his drive when he saw Sam, his eyes widened with fear, he dropped the brush and half walked half ran to his door.

  Sam tried to grab him as he came close to the fence, Colin screamed like a little girl.

  “Get away from me! I’ll phone the police if you touch me.” Sam’s face was ashen his eyes were blazing

  . “Touch you! Touch you, come here you spineless bastard and I’ll rip your fucking head off!” Colin ran in and slammed and locked the door.

  Sam stood there for a few seconds to calm down, he looked around and noticed he had drawn a bit of a crowd, John and Diane Boothroyd from number 8, Charlotte from number 6 and Lisa Talbot from number 15 had been talking in the park when Sam had had a go at Colin.

  Sam looked across and gave them a sickly smile, then he kicked the fence turned and walked back inside, Becky was there waiting for him.

  “Well did you sort it?”

  “No he ran away just like the coward he is.”

  Rebecca went to the bottom of the stairs and shouted Jack, after a few minutes Jack came down.

  “Yeh what do you want?”

  “Jack!” Sam shouted his voice still full of anger.

  “Don’t take it out of your Mother just because that idiot next door has upset you.” Jack put his head down.

  “Sorry Mum.”

  “Ok Jack, Will you take Roxy out for a run before tea please?”

  “Aw Mum do I have to, cant Lizzy take her?”

  “No Jack!” His father said.

  “He’s your dog, you have to take her out.”

  From that moment on Jack would never take Roxy out willingly again Sam and Rebecca had to threaten him with bed or losing his spend every time, Colin had killed any love Jack had had for Roxy.

  Eventually they all sat down together for tea, Sam had just sat down when there was a knock on the door, he went to answer.

  He opened the door and was confronted by three police officers a Sergeant and two constables.

  “Mr Hawksworth?” The sergeant asked.

  “Yes that’s me, Look Jacks been grounded for three weeks, so whatever him next door has said he’s done is not true, ok?”The sergeant stepped forward and took his notebook from his left breast pocket.

  “It’s not your son we’re here about Mr Hawksworth, a serious complaint has been made against you, Mr Wilson, your next door neighbour said you threatened to kill him, is that true?”

  “No I never threatened to kill him I went to ask him why he told my son he was going to have his dog put down, he’s already reported it to the dog warden, look he’s a crackpot and a bully he’s always reporting Jack for something or another he seems to have a problem with him all he ever does is bully and victimize him, well today I had had enough so I went to have a word with him.”

  “Well Mr Wilson say’s you threatened him and he has a witness to that, a Mrs Winsor, she also says she heard you threaten Mr Wilson.”

  “Look there w
ere other people there with Charlotte, I mean Mrs Winsor, What did they say?”

  “We have spoken to the other people there and apparently Mrs Winsor was the only one who heard you. In light of that I am just cautioning you at this moment, that if you do threaten Mr Wilson in any way you will be arrested and face charges.