The Astronomer

by Charmaine Pauls

  She touched his hand. “Emilio, can I see you in private for a moment?”

  He lifted an eyebrow.

  She quickly shook her head. “No, it’s not what you think.”

  He grinned. “What a disappointment.” But he took her hand and led her to his study. When he had closed the door, he took her in his arms. “Do you remember the first time I brought you here?”

  Fraya flushed again. Of course she remembered. “You were a dominant, arrogant, selfish man.”

  He caressed her cheek and said in a seductive voice, “We can have a replay of the event, and I’ll try to rectify where I have erred.”

  It was tempting, she had to admit, but she needed to talk to him before the evening’s event and they had precious little time. She wanted to get the issue burdening her out of the way. She pulled back, but Emilio’s arms tightened around her waist.

  “Emilio, I need to talk to you about work.”

  He kissed her ear. “You’ve achieved your target, so now you’re back on your old job.” He lifted his head, a look of expectation lightening his eyes. “Or you’re taking up a position here at head office?”

  His mistaken assumption made what she needed to say all the more harder. Fraya swallowed. “I’ve been offered another project.”

  She felt him freeze. A small frown creased his brow. “Another exploration project?”

  “In Zone 78.”

  Emilio let go of her abruptly. He stared at her for a moment, looking confused as he assumingly digested the information. He turned his back on her and walked to the window, staring at the garden.

  All he finally said, still not facing her, was, “When?”

  “They gave me two weeks to decide.”

  She saw him rub his forehead in the reflection of the glass.

  “And?” he said tightly.

  “It’s the opportunity of a lifetime.”

  “Is there an alternative?”

  Fraya wrought her hands together. “The alternative would be to go back to the way it was before, taking up my old position in Paranal.”

  “What do you want?” he asked softly.

  Fraya hesitated. “I don’t know.”

  She wanted the job, but not if it meant walking away from her mate, unless her mate had already decided to walk away from her when the year was over.

  Emilio pulled his hands through his hair and then rested them on his hips, his shoulders hunched. He turned back slowly to face her again.

  “I suppose it depends on what you want from us, Fraya.”

  “You mean choose between you and the job?”

  His expression became pained. “This is not a position I would have ever wanted to put you in.” He sighed. A long silence followed.

  “I can’t go to Peru, Fraya, not to live. They’ll never approve a change of zones,” he finally said by means of explaining himself.

  She looked at her hands. “I know that.”

  “So, if you decide to go, it will be because our year is coming to an end, and you truly don’t see yourself living with me for the rest of your life. If you stay, you’ll have to give up the job.”

  If she wanted to stay? Was he saying he didn’t want her to go when their deadline came up?

  “What do you want, Emilio?”

  He shook his head. “This is not about what I want, Fraya. This is about you. You have to decide, all by yourself, what’ll best for you.” He paused. His following words were uttered with much difficulty, but with sincerity. “I want what’ll make you happy.”

  “But I can’t decide if I don’t know how you feel.”

  “You don’t know how I feel?” He sounded surprised.

  “Sometimes I think I do, but honestly, mostly I don’t. You’re not an easy man to read, Emilio.”

  He crossed the floor slowly and took both her hands. “Haven’t my actions told you by now how I feel?”

  “Your actions are sometimes conflicting.”

  “Fraya, I have always loved you. I have loved you from the minute I first saw you.” She blinked in shock. It wasn’t what she had expected, but he bulldozed ahead. “I’m obsessed with you. All I’ve ever wanted was you. You’re the perfect woman for me. I’ll never be happy without you.” She opened her mouth, but he placed his finger over her lips. “I need you physically. But I want you much, much more. I want to spend each minute of every day of the rest of my life with you, but not if you’re unhappy.”

  Fraya’s heart stopped and started beating again, a thunderous rhythm that echoed in her ears. Her lips moved but he held up his hand.

  “Please. Don’t say anything now. I don’t want you to say something you don’t mean because you feel you ought to return my affections out of a sense of duty. I want you to think about what I’ve said. But most of all, think about you, and what you want from life. Today is not the day to discuss this. Today is a joyous day of celebration. Take the time you were offered. Take the two weeks and decide what you want to do with your life, and give me an answer then.”

  Fraya covered her hand with her mouth. Emilio’s consideration was as powerful as his declaration of love. She was overwhelmed, shocked into a happy silence. She said his name as he made for the door, but this time it didn’t stop him. He left her alone to ponder his words, and she suddenly realized that Emilio had never believed that she was capable of loving him. The statement he had made, was one coming from a person who believed that the battle was lost.

  * * * *

  Fraya wanted to run to her mate and tell him he was wrong. She wanted to say that she’d give up everything in the blink of an eye just to be with him, if he only wanted her. And he did. But she also realized that Emilio felt like a man defeated, a man who harbored unrequited love, and to convince him of her feelings, she’d have to relay them in a rational, calm manner, and not in the turmoil of an overemotional evening. If she went to him now, he’d mistrust her answer, thinking it to have been caused by his confession of love. If she came to him two weeks later and told him how she truly felt, he would be more convinced of the sincerity of her feelings. It was a painful and difficult decision to make, but Fraya had learned to be patient, and knew instinctively that this situation called for a lot of tolerance.

  She dressed in a long, black robe and slipped on her silver heels. Ana did her hair and Isabella and Ofelia swirled around like mother hens, Ofelia dabbing more lipstick on and Isabella wiping it off again. When it was time for their guests to arrive, Fraya made her way downstairs. Emilio stood in the entrance conversing with Romero and when he saw her coming down the stairs, he stepped forward to offer her his arm.

  “You look ravishing, Dr. Riber,” he said, and there was nothing in his voice or face to give away any of their previous exchange.

  “Perhaps you could show me how ravishing later,” she said low enough only for him to hear.

  She was rewarded with his seductive smile before it turned reassuring and gentle, loving, as he escorted her to take her place next to him by the door, to welcome their guests.

  People arrived in a steady flow, quickly filling the house and the garden in an array of colors and perfumes. Fraya got separated from Emilio when they started mingling and she looked around for her husband with a feeling of growing panic. Big parties were still not her thing. Fraya was relieved when Dr. Lavigne rescued her from a laborious conversion with a senator.

  Lavigne kissed Fraya’s cheek and braced her shoulder on the wall. “Congratulations, Fraya. You’ve done well.”

  “Thank you. I’m glad you could join us.”

  Lavigne sipped her champagne, studying Fraya over the rim of her glass. “You’ve missed your last appointment. Shall I take it that you and Emilio have come to a decision regarding starting a family?”

  “I missed it?”

  “My office called yours and left a message.”

  “I would have been in the field. I’m guilty of not always checking my messages.”

  “I was rather hoping that you changed your mind.�
��

  “No, Emilio and I haven’t discussed that yet. We still have ... other issues to deal with.”

  “I understand. Until when are you in Santiago?”

  “I’m here for two weeks.”

  “Call me.” Lavigne straightened. “We can set up an appointment before you have to go, unless you want an unplanned pregnancy.”

  Lavigne smiled, making her way back into the crowded room. Fraya wasn’t sure she heard her mumbled expression of thanks.

  It felt like the evening would never end when all Fraya wanted was to be alone with her mate, and she was glad when Emilio finally mounted a small podium that had been set up at the end of the garden to make the toast.

  His eyes locked onto hers as he lifted his glass. “In honor of my brilliant, beautiful mate–”

  He didn’t get any further. Out of nowhere a fist shot out and collided with the side of Emilio’s face, making his glass fly from his hand and his body stumble sideways. There was an uproar in the crowd. Fraya called out. Several people rushed forward, blocking her way, preventing her from getting to Emilio. She saw her mate finding his balance, straightening, and then all eyes turned to the owner of the hand that had dealt the unexpected blow.

  “I said to watch out for her, not to mate her,” Gene hissed.

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Fraya had to blink several times. Emilio straightened his tie. People who didn’t know Gene looked at each other, asking hushed questions, while the ones who knew him, stood speechless.

  “What do you have to say for yourself, traitor?” Gene said.

  “Traitor?” Emilio’s body went rigid, his fists curled into balls. “I’m not the one who walked out on my fiancée. On her fucking mating day.”

  Gene took a step forward. “But that’s what you wanted, isn’t it? You couldn’t wait for me to disappear so that you could steal my mate!”

  The muscles in Emilio’s jaw bunched. “That’s a lie. If anything, I tried to convince you to stay, not to humiliate her. You’re the one who abandoned her when you ran away with Zita!”

  Gene’s head flew toward Fraya. The crowd had moved away from her, leaving her standing alone in a small, vacated circle. She may as well have been standing under a bright spotlight.

  Gene held up his hands. “Fraya, I can explain. It’s not what it sounds like.” He looked back at Emilio. “But you stole my woman and mated her behind my back and hid it from me. You’re a lying, cheating, bag of shit who was never my friend. My so-called best friend.” Gene sneered. “You don’t know the meaning of the word ‘friend’. You–”

  Emilio jumped. He grabbed Gene by his shirt lapels, putting his face inches away from Gene’s. “I’ll kill you for what you did to her. You’re not worth the dirt under her shoes.”

  Fraya watched in stunned horror as the two men confronted each other.

  “You seduced her. You stole her,” Gene shouted.

  “Stole her?”

  “You waited until I was gone and then took her–”

  Emilio’s fist cut Gene short. It landed hard on his chin, lifting Gene from his feet, and it was only Emilio’s hand in his shirt that kept Gene upright.

  When Emilio’s fist lifted again, Fraya stepped forward.

  “Stop! Please, Emilio, stop,” she said, her voice firm, not portraying how badly she was shaking.

  Emilio lowered his arm, but Gene took the opportunity to sneak in another shiner that was going to leave an ugly bruise on Emilio’s left cheek.

  Fraya gasped. “Stop it! It’s not Emilio’s fault,” she called out. “It’s mine! It’s all mine. I’m the lying, cheating coward, not him.”

  Silence fell over the two men. They both turned their heads to look at her.

  “Emilio didn’t steal me,” Fraya said in a softer voice. “He didn’t seduce me. I cheated on you with him, Gene, on our engagement holiday. And I mated him for a year because we have a rare hormone dependency. Our marriage is a contract. I’m the one you should despise, not him. I sold him sex so I could keep my job.”

  The garden and the house went quiet. It was as if Fraya had pressed a pause button on a remote and had stilled a scene from a movie. Fraya looked around. Gene’s face was red, his eyes round and his mouth pulled into a circle. Fraya saw pity and contempt in the sea of eyes surrounding her. Isabella fainted. Ana’s hand was clasped to her mouth. Ofelia downed a glass of wine. Slowly, Fraya turned back to Emilio. He watched her with regret.

  Fraya straightened her shoulders. “It’s time you all learn the truth,” she said, focusing on Gene.

  All the fight had left Gene. He stumbled backward and fell down onto a garden bench. Romero was the only one who seemed capable of taking action. He ordered the waiters to serve brandy. Fraya saw him shoot back a double.

  * * * *

  The party had gone cold without the toast ever made. After the shocking revelation, the guests left quickly and quietly. Gene had been the first one to storm off, not looking left or right, his eyes glazed and his expression tortured. Fraya stood in the middle of the abandoned garden, feeling lost amidst the spoiled chaos. She felt Emilio’s hand on her shoulder, a firm, reassuring touch.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, but she wasn’t. The truth had been eating at her conscience. Even if she was ruined, as far as her reputation was concerned, she would be able to live with herself once more.

  “You needn’t have told the whole world,” Emilio said.

  She wasn’t sure if his voice carried a reprimand or sympathy. She was too embarrassed to face him. Emilio was wrong. She had been hiding behind him, expecting him to carry her sin quietly for too long. Fraya waited for him to tell her that it was alright, to make her feel better, but the silence stretched, until he finally said, “I think it’ll better if we put this mating on hold, until you’ve made your decision.”

  Her heart contracted painfully. Was Emilio sending her away, asking her to leave him when he had only just confessed his love? Had she gone and ruined it all? She spun around, her eyes filled with tears.

  “What about the mating? The hormone? We haven’t even made love since I got back and...” Her voice trailed off when she realized how pathetic she sounded. Now, it was her who was trying to hold him with the bonds of their bodies.

  His words were a punch in the stomach. “We’ve managed before.”

  Emilio turned his back on her and walked to the house.

  * * * *

  How could things have gone so wrong so fast, Emilio wondered the following morning as he looked from his bedroom window to the untidy garden below. One minute he was excited about welcoming his wife home with a party to celebrate her mind-blowing achievement, and the next she was telling him she wanted to go to Peru. And as if a bad joke, just when he had managed to pull himself together, to put on a straight face for the celebration, his long-lost, best friend gate-crashed the party, took a swing at him, and his wife confessed to the world that their marriage was a farce. He couldn’t say he didn’t deserve any of it. Mating Fraya had always been a gamble, but one he was prepared to take. And he had lost. There was no doubt in his mind what her decision was going to be. She would leave him. She would take the job. Why else would she have told the world that she had mated him for only a year? She hadn’t slept in his bed last night. She had packed her bags, kissed him passionately, and left. He hadn’t tried to stop her. Not anymore. In a month their year together was up. She had promised to call him in two weeks, as agreed, and he was a fool for still holding any hope.

  * * * *

  Fraya fell down on the chair facing Lavigne’s desk and pressed the cotton swab onto her skin where the needle had punctured it.

  “Are you sure all these tests are necessary?” Fraya said. “Can’t you just give me the shot and get it over with?”

  “I have to measure the level of hormones in your blood first, and I want to be certain the birth control shot I gave you six months ago has been effective before we repeat it.”

  Fraya placed a hand
over her eyes.

  “You’re not looking very fresh,” Lavigne said.

  “After last night’s fiasco? I feel like death warmed over.”

  “Quite the gossip.”

  Fraya groaned. “I didn’t mean for it to come out like that. I just wanted to...”

  “Defend Emilio?”

  Fraya lowered her hand and let it drop into her lap. “Exactly.”

  “What now?”

  “I don’t know. He sent me away.” She stared at the window. “I think he hates me.”

  “He loves you. It’s obvious.”

  “I humiliated him.”

  “You defended his honor. You told the truth. I wouldn’t worry about it. The story is already being romanticized all over town.”

  Fraya sighed. “He gave me two weeks to give him my answer, to decide if I’m taking the job in Peru, or if I’m staying.”

  “And?”

  “I know what I want to do.”

  “Then tell him.”

  “I will. But not like this. I’ll wait the two weeks. I want him to know that, when I do give him my answer, it was both a rational and emotional decision. I don’t want him to think that I made up my mind on the spur of the moment, influenced by last night’s ordeal.”

  “You’ll know the best way of handling the situation.”

  Fraya rubbed her eyes. “Anyway, I left the house yesterday. I’d rather go back to Antofagasta earlier than planned. I think Emilio could do with some space, right now.”

  “And the mating?”

  Fraya thought about it. She had posed the exact same question to Emilio the night before.

  “It’s odd,” Fraya said, “but I don’t feel anything.”

  Marguerite’s eyebrows lifted.

  “Maybe it’s the emotional stress,” Fraya said.

  “Maybe,” Marguerite echoed.

  “When will you have the test results?”

  “By tomorrow.”

  “I’ll be gone by then.”

  “I can prepare a birth control shot and courier it to the doctor on duty in Antofagasta.”

  “That’ll be great.”

  “Where can I reach you?”