Finding Solace

by C. J. Allison

  “Missed you, too, sweet girl,” I say, pressing her hand against my lips.

  We get to my condo and I look for her reaction as we enter.

  “This is nice, but Zeke, I expected a bachelor’s pad, but where is your furniture?” she says looking around at the mostly empty space.

  “Part of the surprise. Let’s say I’m renovating,” I respond. “I still have obligations at the resort tonight. I hope you don’t mind. I want you to be prepared. I’m not sure if you have been told about this resort, but just about everything goes. It’s really refreshing actually and has been my connection to my family over the years.”

  “I’ve been told a little, and I am intrigued. I think it will be fun. Can I get freshened up and changed before we go?” she asks.

  I walk her to my bedroom and show her the bathroom, pulling her luggage as we go. Having her in my personal space is doing something to me.

  She walks out in a little sundress and sweater. She’s wearing a cute pair of cowboy boots causing dirty images to go through my head.

  It’s still pretty warm here. So, I’m in a pair of cargo shorts and my standard issue resort polo. I grab my ID card and my rubber bracelet. Gracie glances at the bracelet with a questionable look.

  You see, different colors mean different things at this resort. Green means that pretty much anything goes. Yellow is that you are curious and open, and red means you are in a committed and closed relationship.

  Putting it on my wrist, I smirk.

  “Yeah, well, we’ll get you one when we get there. Let’s just say it’s a requirement even as an employee,” I say.

  “I’ve been clued in on those, so I guess I’m going to say…should I be surprised it’s yellow?” she says, shifting on her feet.

  She looks a little upset. I walk up to her and lift her chin, looking into her eyes.

  “I’m required to wear one. That does not mean I’m required to do anything. I haven’t had a chance to exchange it for a red one. I haven’t played there in a while. Also, I haven’t been with anyone since before I was back home,” I say, searching her eyes.

  “It’s not really any of my business, Zeke,” she whispers.

  Taking a step back, I’m trying to respond calmly. “It definitely is your business, Gracie. I’m not sure what you think this is between us, but I’m pretty fucking serious about you.”

  Gracie steps back into my space and places her hand on my chest. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I guess I didn’t want to assume what this is, but I feel the same. Honestly, I guess I was just shocked and jealous when I saw the color of your bracelet and didn’t know how to react. Poorly, obviously”

  “Jealous, huh?” I say, giving her a soft kiss on the lips. “Nothing to be jealous of, sweet girl. I never want to upset you, and I’m sorry that I did.”

  “It’s alright, I’m alright,” she says with a smile. “Just a misunderstanding.”

  “You look adorable, by the way. I’m definitely putting a red bracelet on you the minute we walk through that door,” I say, grabbing her hand and spinning her around.

  “Now who’s acting jealous?” she says, laughing.

  Gracie

  I’m so nervous about seeing Zeke again. I went out and bought new bras and underwear for the trip. I could be wrong, but I’m pretty sure we are going to have sex. I tend to overanalyze things and have been stressing out the past few days to prepare. The intimate grooming was my least favorite. I had let that go for a while and it needed some work.

  The plane trip was faster than I thought. It didn’t leave me much time to mentally prepare. All thoughts of worry left me the moment I saw him standing by the baggage carousel. I took off running and jumped into his arms. It still surprises me that he doesn’t struggle to hold me. Any doubt I had left me on how I feel about this man. My only doubt is how he feels.

  When we stepped into his condo, I was shocked at how barren it was. He made some cryptic remark about renovations.

  I’m excited to see the resort. I’ve heard plenty of stories, mostly all hearsay, so seeing if those stories have any truth to them is exciting.

  After getting changed, I exit the bathroom to see Zeke slipping on a yellow bracelet. I instantly bring attention to it since I’m pretty certain I know what the color means. I’m just not sure what it means to him or us.

  I don’t like to assume so I try to play it off. Zeke, however, calls me out and sets me straight. I need to stop with this self-doubt. It’s only going to cause problems if I continue.

  Walking to the resort was what I needed to clear my head. Zeke held my hand and pointed out things, seemingly just as excited to show them to me as I was seeing them.

  When we approached the grand entrance, I was in awe. This place is stunning. It was like we stepped into another world. I tried not to gawk, but it was exactly like the stories I heard. Seeing it in person though, I was lost for words.

  Zeke marched us straight to the front desk greeting the receptionist and asking for two red bracelets. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face.

  As we are heading to what I’m assuming is the lounge, we are greeted by the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. She pulls Zeke into an embrace that catches me off guard. It seems a little too friendly.

  “Hey there, handsome. We have it all set up for you. Oh, my lord. Would you just look at this beautiful specimen? You must be Gracie. I’ve heard so many things about you. Zeke said you were gorgeous, but his words do not give you justice at all. Those eyes, girl. I could get lost in those puppies.” I smile at her exaggerated comments.

  “She’s mine. Plus look at the red bracelet. Gracie, this is the resort’s General Manager, Rachel,” Zeke says tucking me under his arm.

  “I see you’ve switched to red too. Officially off the market, huh? You are one lucky girl, Gracie. It’s nice to finally meet you,” Rachel says, squeezing my hand.

  I notice she has unusually large hands. That’s when it hits me. “Oh…umm…nice to meet you, too?” I say more like a question.

  I’m not really sure how I should act. I feel stupid that I’m all of a sudden awkward. I look to Zeke for some guidance but end up getting it from Rachel.

  “Oh, I see the light bulb just went off. Damn hands always seem to give me away. That and the Adam’s Apple that I was blessed with. Believe me, I look much better like this than I ever did as a man. God at least provided me with dainty features in other regions,” she says, pointing to her high cheekbones.

  “I’m sorry and embarrassed that I don’t know how to act. You are very beautiful, Rachel,” I say.

  “Don’t be embarrassed or sorry, dear. It’s a natural reaction really. You should have seen Zeke the first time we met. He was basically babbling,” she responds laughing.

  Zeke nods his head and laughs along with her making me relax. I think I’m more jealous of how smooth her skin is and how great she looks in that tailored pant suit.

  Rachel leads me to a table in front of the stage as Zeke goes up and starts setting up. She tells me to order whatever I want, that it’s on the house.

  Before she leaves, she leans in and gives me a kiss on the cheek. “I said earlier that you were one lucky girl. He’s the lucky one. You truly are a vision. Take care of him.”

  I’m a little confused. She looks like she is ready to cry. Surely, they didn’t have a thing? I guess they may have? What is going on? This isn’t the first cryptic or mixed message I’ve gotten since I got here.

  A waitress comes to the table to take my order. I feel like I should drink wine or something classy, but I was never really good at picking out a wine I liked. So, I go for the beer I’m used to drinking. She quickly returns with my drink and a tray of crackers and assorted cheeses.

  I jump in my chair when Zeke’s voice comes over the microphone. I wasn’t prepared for it to be that loud. He glances around the room as he introduces himself.

  “For the new folks in the room, my name is Zeke Boyd, and I will be your en
tertainment for the evening. I see a few regulars have joined us as well, glad you could make it tonight. Welcome everyone,” he says.

  I sit in awe at listening to him sing. He’s entertaining as well, getting the folks in the crowd involved in singing along. After his first set, he comes down and sits next to me making a motion to the waitress.

  “Okay, I was going to let this be a surprise. The more I think about it, the more I think it may seem more like I’m blindsiding you,” Zeke says, taking my hands into his.

  I’m getting a little nervous now. He looks nervous and it’s not helping things. I just sit here looking at him with so many questions flooding my head.

  “I’m moving home,” he says, looking intently for my reaction.

  My heart starts pounding in my chest and I almost let out a squeal. “That’s why your condo is practically empty and Rachel looked like she was about to cry when she told me to take care of you,” I say, putting all the pieces together.

  “Not sure about Rachel, but you are correct on the condo part. My stuff is probably already in Maryland by now.” He pauses and takes in a deep breath, “The moment I got home after the wedding I felt off. Hell, I didn’t even want to leave and come back here in the first place. I already had conversations with my dad about it and got some sound advice. I’ve never once felt homesick in all the years I was gone. I felt it before I even left. I can do my job anywhere really, but I put in for a transfer and it was accepted. Between that and my parents’ help, things just started falling into place. I’ll be living at the apartment, much to Gram Pam’s insistence. I also want to be a part of your life. I want us to be able to explore this relationship without the distance. If you will have me that is.”

  I have a lump in my throat and can barely get the words out. “You are amazing. I…I can’t believe it.”

  “Believe it, sweet girl. Oh, and I got your return flight cancelled and refunded. William said to take your time coming back, he’s got things covered.”

  “Wait, what?” I say, wiping a happy tear from my face.

  “We are going back the way I came. I want to show you all the things I experienced when I drove here. It won’t be three months long, though. Just a week. You game?”

  I nod my head enthusiastically. I can’t believe he did all this. I know it’s not all for me, but it feels like I played a part.

  He kisses my temple and says he has to get back up on stage. I pull out my phone and send of a text to Akia.

  Me: Favorite status has been achieved.

  Akia: He finally told you! I’m so happy for you!

  Me: So you knew?

  Akia: Babe, everyone knew but you. He begged us not to tell you.

  I look from my phone to Zeke giving him a fake scowl and get a shoulder shrug in return.

  Zeke

  I got the reaction I had been praying for from Gracie. A look of utter joy came across her face and it made my heart smile. I was going to wait, but I kept thinking that blindsiding her was probably not the best way to go.

  I’m about to sing the last song. The last song I may ever sing here. I feel a bit of sorrow but then think about what lies ahead.

  I clear my throat. “I have a very special lady sitting in the audience. She took my breath away the first time I set eyes on her and she still does every time I look at her. I have some bad news, though. She’s from Maryland and it looks like in order to keep my heart intact, I need to leave this wonderful city and go back home. I can remember the day I walked in here at eighteen like it was yesterday. This gig helped with spending money through college, and even after I was lucky enough to get a job in my field, I couldn’t stop coming back to sing. This place has always been special to my family, and I’m honored that I was given the chance to make it special to me. Hopefully, this won’t be my last song here ever. I’ll be back to visit on vacation when I can. With that being said, this last song is dedicated to my sweet girl, Gracie.”

  I start the first part of Sunday Morning, by Parmalee as I see Gracie press her hands against her chest and smile. I see the glimmer of tears roll down her face as she listens closely to the words. I put my feelings into it trying to convey how much the words mean to me. There is truthfulness in the words and how they make me think of Gracie.

  There’s one line that goes, “Ain’t nothing like the way you bring the crazy down.” When I sing it, I look directly at her and she smiles. She knows that a simple touch of her hand has calmed me on a few occasions.

  When I finish, I bow my head and send up a prayer of thanks for all God has given me. Cheers and applause fill the lounge and I’m humbled. The stage lights dim as I pack up my guitar.

  Gracie comes up on stage and gives me a hug. “That song. Wow.”

  “I couldn’t have written it better for you if I tried,” I say, kissing her on the top of her head.

  I say my goodbye’s and try not to get emotional. This place has been a very important part of my life, of me growing up into a man. I’ve experienced some wonderful things here. A few kinky things as well.

  Rachel is the last person waiting for me right by the exit. She’s fanning her face wearing a wobbling smile.

  “Hey, none of that. This is merely a see you later, never a goodbye. I’ll be back on vacation, I promise,” I say, pulling her into my arms.

  “The only thing bad about being a woman…these pesky hormones,” she laughs. “Right then, see you later, Zeke. Good luck in your new ventures. Keep in touch.”

  “I promise I will,” I say, kissing her on the cheek.

  I watch as she engulfs Gracie in a bear hug, kisses her cheek, and rushes off still fanning her face.

  Once we exit, I stop and turn around taking a long look. Even though it makes me sad to leave, I feel a sense of closure on this chapter of my life. I’m ready to forge ahead and ready to get Gracie naked and into my bed.

  I move the strap of the guitar case so it’s at my back and swoop Gracie up into my arms. I take off running towards my condo. She lets out a squeal and we both start laughing.

  I get to my front door and adjust her so I can pull my keys out of my pocket. I finally get the door open and walk through before setting her down on her feet.

  I push the door closed with my foot and slip the guitar case off and to the floor. We are just standing there staring at each other, but I can see her chest rising with each quick breath.

  We both take a step towards each other at the same time. My hands go into her hair as she grabs my shirt into her fists. Our lips meet slowly at first. I’m savoring her taste, the feel of lips, and the nibbles of her teeth.

  There’s a slow burn making its way straight to my cock. I start backing her down the hallway until I have the back of her legs against my bed. I can’t hold back any longer as I take her mouth with more aggression. Her little sounds of pleasure have my heart racing. Taking off her sweater, I place a kiss on the side of her neck and down to her bare shoulders. I reach around and unzip the back of the dress as she moves the straps and the dress falls to the floor. Kissing the top of her ample breasts, I undo the clasp of her bra and watch in wonder as it also falls to the floor.

  She quickly reached for my shirt, pulling it from my shorts and over my head. I tangle my hands in her hair and bring her lips back to mine. The softness of her breasts against my bare chest has my cock jumping and straining in my pants.

  Gracie runs her hand down my chest and to my erection, cupping me through the material. I grind into her hand and throw my head back with a groan. Sitting on the bed, she releases the button and zipper slowly pulling both my shorts and my boxers down my legs until they meet her dress on the floor. I watch as she leans forward running the tip of her tongue over her lips. I pull her hair back so I can watch. The jolt of pleasure runs straight to my balls as she takes me into her hand, stroking me from base to tip.

  “I’ve wanted to taste you for forever,” she moans as she takes me into her mouth and looks up at me.

  There’s nothing sexier t
han having a beautiful woman look into your eyes as she sucks your cock. Having it be Gracie is even more incredible. Her eyes seem to bore straight to my soul.

  “Fuck that feels incredible. If you keep it up, this will be finished before it gets started,” I say, pulling her off me.

  She lays back on the bed, fanning her hair out. “You look like an angel, so beautiful,” I say, looking over her bare torso.

  I lift each leg and remove her boots tossing them to the other side of the room. Leaning over her, I kiss her belly and each hip as I glide her panties over her hips and down her legs.

  She scoots herself up the bed, and I can’t seem to stop staring. This amazing woman is finally in my bed. Not taking my eyes off her, I move to the nightstand and pull out some condoms.