Just an Illusion - The B Side

by D. Kelly

  Introductions are made, and Karen couldn’t look happier that Jordan brought a friend. Karen hugs Allie almost as ferociously as she did me at Thanksgiving. Sawyer brings his presents into the room and watches Jordan and Allie with an intense curiosity. If Jordan gets a girlfriend, Sawyer will be the only one of them without. The thought makes me sad, but then I remember our conversation a few weeks ago; he’ll settle down when he’s ready.

  Warren and Sam are next to arrive, followed by Anna and Wyatt. Their arms are filled with gifts, and they even have to make a second trip out to get the rest of them plus their bags. Noah and Sawyer are quick to help. I take the opportunity to talk to Allie as we both gingerly sip on Karen’s fuel-filled eggnog.

  “Have you known Jordan long?” I ask, trying to break the silence. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Rory and Diane covertly turning their attention toward us.

  “Actually, I started working at the bar the night of the show. I’m sorry for what happened to you guys. I’m glad you’re both healing well.”

  “It was scary, but we’re both perfectly fine now.”

  “So Jordan says you’re a writer. Anything I might have read?”

  Rory snickers and Rob tosses the couch pillow at her.

  “She wrote The O Factor,” Diane tells her with a hint of pride in her voice. I haven’t even spent much time with Diane, but I’m guessing she’s also read my book.

  “Get out! That was you? I loved that book!” The guys come back in on the heels of her words, and she turns her attention to Jordan. “Jordan, you didn’t tell me she wrote The O Factor!” The way she scolds him makes me think there’s something a little deeper going on between them other than boss and subordinate, but it’s not my place to ask.

  “Like I knew what Noah’s girlfriend wrote? I just knew it was some kind of sex book so it wouldn’t be anything I’d probably ever read. Now you know.”

  Allie rolls her eyes at him and takes a huge gulp of her drink. That’s gotta burn, but she seems to need it after Jordan sits next to her and places his hand on her thigh. She doesn’t move it away, either. Something is definitely brewing between these two.

  “So, Allie, does your family live close?” Karen asks, also noticing Jordan’s hand on her thigh.

  “No, it’s just me and my dad these days, but he lives in Washington D.C. and is working over the holidays. It’s the first Christmas I haven’t seen him, so Jordan took pity on me and brought me here. I hope you don’t mind.”

  “Doesn’t look like pity to me,” Sawyer pipes up, and Owen throws him a parental glare. “Just saying, they look cozy.”

  Karen also gives him a “shut up” look to which Sawyer actually pays attention. “Of course we don’t mind, the more the merrier. And don’t pay a lick of attention to Sawyer. You know these boys are brothers in every way it matters and it shows. You’ll see in the morning … I think the three of them get more excited for presents than my granddaughters do.”

  “Like Rory and Diane don’t get excited about gifts,” Noah adds, defending the brothers.

  “I’m pretty sure it was you and Sawyer who pushed so hard Jordan fell down and broke his arm one Christmas morning when you were about thirteen,” Owen says with a pointed gaze, and Allie and I bust up laughing. The rest of them must have heard this already, but this is new to me.

  “You didn’t, Noah!” I say through my hysterical sobs.

  “Oh, he did. They were so excited because they saw guitar-shaped silhouettes under the tree and it was all either of them had asked for the whole year. After that, we all piled into the car and spent the bulk of the morning in the emergency room.”

  Jordan smiles up at Karen. “Yup, and when we got home, Mom and Dad made Noah and Sawyer pass out all the gifts to everyone. As punishment, they had to wait to open theirs until the rest of us were done.”

  “That doesn’t seem like too much punishment. My dad would have whooped my behind,” Allie replies.

  Karen continues, “Oh, that wasn’t all. We didn’t let them have their guitars until Jordan said they could. But Jordan has a good heart and he loves his brothers. They had those guitars opened before bedtime.”

  Someone is ringing the doorbell like crazy. It must be the pizza this time.

  “I got it,” Sawyer says, running to grab the door.

  “Mel! This one is on you!” he calls out.

  Noah gives me an odd look, but I have no clue who could be here. As soon as I’m in the hall, Eli catches sight of me and barrels past Sawyer, scooping me up and spinning me around.

  “You crazy, amazing, wonderful, thoughtful best friend of mine! You made me cry in front of everyone, but I fucking love you, woman! Your friendship is still the better gift, though,” he says, setting me down. I brace my arm against the wall so I don’t fall from the dizziness.

  “I take it you got your gift,” I reply, letting his enthusiasm sink in. He pulls me in for another hug; he’s crying this time. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to upset you, Eli.”

  He pushes me back at arm’s length while our audience watches. “I’m not upset. I’m so happy I could burst. Seriously, Mel, that gift is everything, and it means more to me than you could possibly imagine. I had to come thank you in person. I’m sorry for interrupting. My parents weren’t too happy about me ditching out, but I had to.”

  “Damn, Mel, what did you give him?” Wyatt asks, and Anna shushes him.

  “Alright, you guys, I’m sorry for interrupting your night. Amelia Triton, you have always been and always will be my all-time favorite person. Hold on to her, Weston, they don’t make them much better.” His eyes linger on Rory; I’m sure Noah notices the attraction between them this time.

  Eli leaves as quick as he came and all eyes are on me. “It was nothing, you guys. I gave him a guitar.”

  “Boy Band plays guitar?” Wyatt’s shocked tone doesn’t surprise me. There’s a lot more to Eli than what the public knows.

  “He does, and he’s really good, too. He learned from the best.”

  “What kind of guitar was it?” Sawyer asks. He and Noah are propped up against the wall next to each other now, both in defensive poses.

  “Does it matter?” I ask, losing most of the crowd with my tone. They’re pissing me off.

  “Humor us,” Noah says.

  “Fine. It was a 1934 Martin 000-45.”

  Wyatt whistles from behind me, Sawyer looks pissed, and Noah seems downright hurt.

  “Did you go home to get that?” Noah asks with an accusing tone.

  “Home?” Wyatt and Sawyer echo, but I ignore them.

  “No, Noah, I wouldn’t do that without you. I called one of the property managers and had them pack it up for Eli and send it to him. I don’t owe you an explanation, but I’ll give you one because I don’t have anything to hide.”

  The three of them wait with baited breath for me to continue, but I need a second to compose myself. “My dad taught Eli to play on that guitar. It was Dad’s favorite guitar and he took it everywhere with us. He always intended to give it to Eli one day. After he was gone, I didn’t think about it. Probably because I was so angry with Eli. When we started talking about the house the other day, I remembered. And since Eli did me a huge favor by going with me to get your present today, I figured I owed him one. This one just happened to be a long time coming. Giving Eli that guitar was the right thing to do, and none of you are going to make me feel bad about it.”

  On that note, I pivot on my heel and go back into the kitchen. After downing my eggnog, I have Karen give me a refill. They don’t get to be in the Christmas spirit for some people and not others. Who do they think they are?

  Noah’s strong arms wrap around me from behind, but I don’t let myself fall into them like usual. “I’m sorry, babe. I had no right to judge or be jealous. What you did was a good thing and I’m proud of you.”

  “Thank you,” I say, allowing myself to lean back into his embrace as he kisses
me on the top of my head.

  “They’re so cute,” Allie says to Jordan from the couch, and he just shakes his head. I think Jordan is a lot more like Sawyer than he is Noah.

  After the pizza finally came, I was completely buzzed and I’m pretty sure everyone else in the house was, too. We were all spread around the table and the bar, eating and having a great time.

  “Uncle Noah?” Saylor asks, tucking a dangling strand of cheese into her mouth.

  “Yes, ladybug?”

  “My mommy says you’re going to make lots of babies with Amelia. Will they be my cousins?” It was suddenly so quiet you could hear a pin drop. Diane covers her eyes with her hands, and Rob begins laughing uncontrollably, as does Noah. I must look like a deer caught in headlights, but when I see Sawyer’s face he looks sad.

  “Maybe someday, Saylor, but not anytime soon. But yes, when I have a baby they will be your cousin.” Noah diffused that situation like a boss, and I suddenly find myself thinking about how sexy he is when he’s around his nieces. I can only imagine how I’d feel if he was all lovey like that with our kids.

  “My wife is going to have to stop talking where little ears can hear,” Rob teases Diane, and Karen and Owen chuckle.

  “It’s a lesson we all learn at some point. They get to a certain age where they repeat everything,” Owen tells Diane with a sympathetic nod.

  Darren and Belle come in and Belle is practically drooling. “Want some pizza, mama?” I ask, passing her my plate.

  “I’m not sure I do, but this baby smells cheese and dough and I’m suddenly starving. She’s going to be a carbaholic.” Belle takes a bite with an appreciative moan. And while she enjoys her pizza, Emme is tugging on Darren’s pant leg with pizza-covered fingers.

  “What’s up, Emme buns?” Darren leans down and she feeds him a bite. He plops down on the floor with her and they babble about pizza and God knows what else. I think Belle’s ovaries are about to explode watching the two of them. If she has this kind of reaction with him and Emme, she’s going to be knocked up again in no time.

  After the girls had their baths and were snuggled into their pajamas, they got things ready for Santa. Saylor and Sawyer picked out all the perfect Christmas cookies for Santa, and Emme picked out the carrots for the reindeer. My poor childhood reindeer must have been starving because we never left treats for them at our house. Diane and Rob finally put the girls to bed, and Karen took all the stockings to her room to fill after she and Owen said their goodnights.

  Once the girls were asleep, the siblings jumped into action moving bikes, dollhouses, kitchen playsets, and more into the living room, surrounding the tree with them. It looks like a Christmas toy catalog. “This is too much, you guys! We’re never going to fit all of this into our house!” Diane exclaims in awe.

  Based on what everyone bought for the little ones, Santa has been extra giving this year.

  “They can leave some of it here. They’ll get a kick out of being able to come over and play with it. We’ll be back at Easter, but you know you guys can come over whenever to hang out and go to the beach. It will give them toys for the summer.” Sawyer makes a valid point.

  We spend hours talking and drinking until Rob realizes it’s after midnight. Knowing the girls will be up early and we’re all drunker than we should be—except for Belle, of course—we decide to call it a night.

  As soon as Noah and I make it into our room, he presses me against the wall, slamming his mouth against mine in a passionate kiss. His hands are everywhere all at once and so are mine. When my hands make their way to his cock, he groans in appreciation. “I’m so fucking hard for you right now.”

  “Do you want your present, Noah? It’s technically Christmas and I’d like to give it to you in private.”

  “Is it sexual?” he asks with a wicked gleam in his eyes.

  “Not necessarily, but I think it will be. Get naked and be ready for me. I’ll be back in a minute.”

  “Don’t take too long, Mel. I don’t have much patience right now.” He tugs on my bottom lip with his teeth and smacks my ass. Hm … drunk Noah is playful; this could be fun.

  I pull three bags out from under the cabinet. One has part of my present to Noah, one has a present for Belle’s baby, and the last one has Christmas wrapping paper and supplies.

  Noah’s present is a red lace camisole and a pair of low-riding panties. Once I have them on, I tape a piece of wrapping paper over my bandage as decoration. My heart begins to pound; I hope I did the right thing and this isn’t about to blow up in my face. I’m so far out of my comfort zone right now I could cry, but I did this for Noah; I’d do anything for him.

  When I walk out of the bathroom, he’s instantly on his feet. “Damn, Mel, you look beautiful.” He grazes his hands across the lacey material, pausing below my hip. Walking backward to the bed, he inches up my camisole and lowers my panties a bit, his eyes narrowing at the festively-covered bandage. “What’s this, Mel? What did you do?” I’m biting my lip, and Noah brings his finger up and pulls it from my mouth. “Talk to me, baby. What is this?”

  “It’s something for us. I have a hard time letting people into my heart, Noah, and you are my polar opposite in that aspect. In everything you do, you’re looking to the future, encouraging me and reminding me you have faith in us, even if I’m not ready for the big steps yet.”

  “And I always will,” he replies sincerely, his hands still hovering around the bandage but not touching it.

  “I know you will, and this is my way of showing you even if my logical mind isn’t there yet, my heart has been with yours every step of the way and always will be, forever.” My hands begin to tremble as I brace them on his shoulders. He sits down on the edge of the bed and traces the outer edges.

  “Can I open it now?”

  I nod wordlessly as he carefully pulls the bandage back. Since the ink is fresh, it’s still covered in ointment, but the black script is bold and unmistakable. His eyes bounce back and forth between mine and the tattoo. He’s speechless; I can only hope that’s a good thing.

  “Do you like it?”

  A single tear escapes his eye and he kisses his way up my body, slowly and seductively. “It’s the sexiest fucking thing I’ve ever seen and the best present anyone has ever given me.”

  “Really?” I ask on a sigh of relief, thankful I didn’t just mess things up.

  “Do you even have to ask? You tattooed my last name on one of the sexiest parts of your body where only I can see it. The name that will soon enough be yours, the name that will belong to our children. You just made yourself a part of my family legacy without me even asking you to. How could I not love it?”

  “Um … yeah, about that … Eli has seen it. I needed someone to go with me and he was the lucky winner. But Noah, he’s so fucking happy for us. And he knows, without a doubt, you’re the man who holds the key to my heart and my happiness.”

  “Damn straight I do.” Noah pulls off the camisole and my panties, kissing his way from my hips to my toes as he takes them off. My entire body hums with need. After grabbing a condom off the nightstand and rolling it on, he lies down and pulls me to him. “Love me, Mel.”

  With my legs spread over his, I position him at my entrance and slide down onto him slowly. His hands move immediately to my hips, with his thumb caressing the outer edges of the “W” on my new tattoo. He’s careful not to touch it since it’s still a bit pink and tender, but he’s getting as close as possible. His eyes are locked on it as I ride him slowly, as if it’s going to disappear into thin air if he loses sight of it.

  I can’t even be mad; it’s obvious he loves it. Even without making eye contact with me directly, he’s making love to me with every other part of his body.

  “Kiss me, Amelia,” he commands, finally moving his eyes to mine. As I take his mouth with mine, he pushes deeper into me. Lacing his fingers through my hair with one hand, he sits up on his other elbow and pulls me closer to hi
m. With every stroke of his tongue and thrust of his hips he brings me higher and higher into euphoria.

  Our passionate cries fuel the desire between us, each of us not able to get enough of the other. If I knew getting a tattoo would have this effect on Noah, I might have done it sooner. “Noah!” I cry when he hits that perfect spot inside of me again and again.

  “Come with me, Amelia,” he says, gripping my hip harder, trying to hold on as he waits for me.

  My walls convulse around him, and I stifle my cries by taking his lips in mine. Noah’s body trembles as he powerfully releases himself into me. He wraps both his arms around me and we tumble back onto the mattress together, both of us panting as if we just ran a marathon.

  After he tosses away the condom, Noah climbs on top of me, resting his head by my upper thigh as he traces his fingers around and around my tattoo. “Thank you for my present.” His sparkling eyes meet mine.

  “You’re welcome,” I reply with a smile.

  “I have to ask, have you always wanted a tattoo?”

  “Nope, not really.”

  With my words, he comes back up to the top of the bed and tucks me into the crook of his arm. “So why now, Mel?” He seems concerned now that the endorphins are wearing off; maybe the alcohol is, too.

  “That night with Sara was eye-opening for me in a lot of ways. My logical mind tells me it’s only been three months, almost five if you count when we met. But the part of me my heart rules says it doesn’t matter. Love is love. I love you, Noah Weston, and I don’t need a calendar to remind me it hasn’t been long enough, or that it’s been just the right amount of time.”

  “So you’re proving a point to yourself?” he asks with genuine curiosity.

  “No, not even close. I’m reminding myself life should be lived to the fullest and you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I put your name on my body because you’re the only man I’ve ever wanted as a permanent fixture in my life. Ever, Noah. After what happened to us, I don’t care what anyone thinks.”