The Samantha Project

by Stephanie Karpinske

  “The cabin? Why would we go to your cabin? Christmas is on Tuesday.”

  “Precisely, that’s why we’re going. We need to get away. Too many memories here, Sam. I think it’s best if we spend the holidays somewhere else.”

  “But you decorated the house. Put up the tree.”

  “We’ll put a tree up at the cabin. Come on, Sam. Don’t fight me on this. I have some things to do for work. I’ll be in your dad’s office if you need me.”

  And that was that. Dave taking over as parental figure once again without even considering my input. If this arrangement was going to continue, we would have to have a talk. Soon.

  Allie arrived in the afternoon. Her hair was already done. It looked like an ad for a shampoo commercial, all long, shiny, and beautiful.

  As she went to work on my hair and makeup, I told her about Dave’s plans to go to the cabin and how mad I was about it. She calmed me down as usual, saying how she wasn’t thrilled about having to spend the entire Christmas break in Paris with her parents. I didn’t say anything, but I would have picked Paris with my parents any day over a fishing cabin with Dave.

  After a few hours of primping, I wasn’t sure what to expect. But when Allie was done, it looked really good. My hair was pulled into a low ponytail that Allie somehow wrapped and pinned so that it was off my neck. It was loose and pretty and little pieces of my wavy curls fell beside my ear. She kept my makeup soft and natural. All together, she had created a look that was exactly me.

  Allie left my house around 6 to get dressed. She had finally accepted Brad’s invite to the dance.

  Colin arrived shortly after in a black tuxedo and deep red tie to match my dress. Dave insisted on taking the obligatory pictures before letting us leave.

  “You’ll want these photos someday, Sam,” Dave said. “Now stand still. Colin, put your arm around her.”

  “Sorry about this,” I whispered to Colin.

  “No problem. Just make sure I get copies,” Colin whispered back. “You look incredible—I can’t stop staring at you.”

  After taking at least 20 shots, Dave was finally satisfied. “Okay, you can go. Get her back early, Colin. We’re heading out of town in the morning.”

  “We’ll be home around midnight, Uncle Dave.” I pulled Colin to the door, rushing to escape before Dave could give us more of his parental rules.

  Over dinner, I explained the sudden cabin trip to Colin. He was upset that we wouldn’t see each other on Christmas Day, but there was no use arguing about it. Dave was making me go. I promised Colin that we would have our own Christmas when I got back.

  When we got to school, the parking lot was packed. Apparently everyone went to these things but me. I had been to three school dances in all of my years of school and had dreaded each one of them. This one, I actually looked forward to. Probably because I knew it was my last high school dance. But also because I was with Colin and I made a promise to myself that I would make this our night and not a night spent thinking about the accident.

  Colin opened the car door for me and held out his hand. He looked so great in his tuxedo. Dave was right. I would want those pictures. I took Colin’s hand and got out of the car. Even with his help, I lost my balance and started to fall. Colin caught me and pulled me up.

  “Sorry, I guess I’m not that coordinated in heels,” I said, blushing.

  “That’s why I’m here. To save you from your high heels.” He smiled, still holding me up. “Hey, before we go in, I just want to thank you for going with me. I know you hate these things and technically you’re done with high school, so it means a lot that you did this.”

  “It’s no big deal. I wanted to come. Really I did. Ready to go in?”

  “Yeah, but one more thing.” He paused, then stepped back a little to look at me. “You look fantastic tonight, Sam. I mean, not that you don’t always look nice but tonight, well, you look really beautiful.”

  I was flattered, but a little embarrassed. “Um, thanks. And you look very handsome.” I grabbed his arm so I wouldn’t fall on the wet pavement.

  When we got inside, we could hear the music blaring from the gym. A couple of my teachers were taking tickets. As Colin dealt with the tickets, I went and hung up our coats so the teachers wouldn’t start asking me questions about life after graduation.

  Inside the school gym, we were greeted with a sea of twinkling blue and white lights. It was a winter wonderland theme. Glittery white snowflakes hung from the ceiling. Giant blue glass bowls filled with silver-wrapped chocolates served as centerpieces at the tables around the dance floor.

  I looked over at Colin, who was smiling from ear to ear. It was nice to see him so happy.

  “It looks really good, don’t you think? Doesn’t even look like the gym.”

  Colin didn’t hear me over the loud dance music playing in the background. He grabbed my hand and led me through the gym toward the other side of the room. He leaned over and whispered in my ear. “They’re all looking at you, Sam. I told you. You look so hot tonight.”

  It was a nice thing to say but I thought it was a bit over the top, the way parents go on about how wonderful their kids are and assume everyone else thinks so, too. But when I looked around, I noticed that people really were staring at us—at me! All the attention made me nervous. I focused on taking small steps so I wouldn’t trip in the heels.

  “Sam!” It was Allie. She ran up to greet us, with Brad, her date, straggling behind. “Oh my God, doesn’t she look great, Colin?” Allie didn’t wait for him to answer. “She looks totally great. I did her hair and makeup. And hey,” she grabbed Colin’s arm, “you did a good job on the dress. You know, for a guy.”

  Colin laughed. “The dress is just a dress. Sam is what makes it look so good.”

  “Isn’t he sweet?” Allie put her arm around me. “I just love him. You’re such a cute couple.” The music changed and Allie stopped to listen. “Yes! I love this song! Brad! Dance floor. Now.” She walked over to Brad and dragged him away.

  “Allie and Brad,” Colin said, watching them and shaking his head. “I don’t get it. But somehow it works. Do you want to sit down?”

  “Sure.” My feet were already starting to feel sore.

  “I’m gonna get us something to drink and say hi to the guys. Hey, why don’t you come with so I can show you off?”

  I could see the football team, along with a few of their cheerleader girlfriends, scattered near the food and drink tables. I had never felt comfortable around those people, even when I was with Colin.

  “No, I’d rather stay here. Let my feet rest.”

  “Okay. I’ll be right back.”

  When he left, I turned my attention to the dance floor. I noticed Jessica, my friend from work, who was dateless but still dancing like crazy. She waved at me when she saw me. Will was there, too, but didn’t see me. He was too busy trying to impress his date with his dance moves.

  Allie was the best dancer out there, although to be fair, she had taken all different types of dance classes growing up. Brad tried to keep up but seemed more interested in checking out Allie. She was wearing a deep blue dress, probably to coordinate with the theme of the dance, although she’d never admit that. The dress fit snugly but wasn’t too tight; it had thin straps holding it up. Allie moved in ways that showed off the dress and her curves. It drove Brad crazy and she knew it.

  “Hey, Sam. Nice dress.” I heard the sarcastic tone and knew instantly it was Caitlyn. She was wearing a long, tight black sequined dress with a slit on one side that went all the way up to her hip. It was a strapless dress, and she had to keep yanking it up so she wouldn’t fall out. “I noticed that your date’s not here. Let’s see—where is he?”

  “Over there with the cheerleaders.” Stacey, who was in a short, bright pink strapless dress, walked up beside Caitlyn and pointed over at Colin. “Guess he knows where the hot girls are. And he leaves you sitting over here all alone.”

  I ignored both of them, making Caitlyn ev
en more determined to push my buttons. “Now that you’re done with school, I’ll see Colin way more than you. I’ll see him every single day. In the halls. At lunch. At practice. And seriously, do you think he can resist this?” She pointed to her body.

  Stacey started to say something, but a guy behind her interrupted. “Sam, do you want to dance?” It was Matt Blake, one of the most popular guys in school. He looked good all dressed up—much better than he ever looked on a regular school day.

  Caitlyn and Stacey were speechless. They looked at each other but still didn’t have a response.

  “I was kind of saving the first dance for Colin,” I said. Caitlyn’s mouth dropped open. Apparently, girls never said no to Matt.

  Before Matt could respond, Colin walked up behind him. “Putting your moves on my girl, Matt?”

  Colin was kidding, but it took Matt by surprise. “What? No, I just saw her over here and thought she might want to dance.”

  “I’m getting the first dance, but how about the next one, if that’s okay with Sam.”

  “Sure, next dance,” I said, although I really only wanted to dance with Colin. But if dancing with Matt would drive Caitlyn and Stacey crazy, then why not? Matt walked away and some other girls raced up to talk to him.

  Stacey started to say something but stopped when she saw Tyler and Braden, two guys from the basketball team, walk up behind Colin.

  “Hey, buddy,” Tyler said, putting his hand on Colin’s shoulder. He leaned in as if telling Colin a secret but said it loud enough for all of us to hear. “Looks like you got the hottest date tonight.”

  Caitlyn was fuming. She had been trying to date Tyler for years with no luck. She pushed Colin aside and placed herself directly in front of Tyler. “She’s dancing with Colin, but I could dance with you.”

  Tyler ignored Caitlyn completely, which was easy to do since he was at least a foot taller than her. He started talking sports with Colin and Braden, but Colin quickly interrupted him. “Tyler, let’s talk at practice. As you said, I’ve got a hot girl waiting here.”

  Tyler smiled and looked over at me. “Yeah, man. Got it. See ya at practice.”

  Caitlyn stood there, still in shock. “Caitlyn, let’s go. Our dates are waiting.” Stacey went over and nudged Caitlyn away from the table.

  “You see what I mean?” Colin whispered in my ear. “It’s not just me. Everyone sees how beautiful you look tonight. Now let’s dance.”

  I had never paid much attention to my appearance, so it was an odd feeling for so many people to notice me that way. It was a great dress and Allie had done an exceptional job getting me ready.

  The dance floor was packed, so I didn’t feel too self-conscious. Luckily, our first dance was a slow dance. Colin kept a good hold on me, making sure I didn’t fall.

  “I’m getting better with the shoes now.” I leaned in close so he could hear me above the music. “You don’t have to hold on so tight.”

  “Maybe I want to.” He whispered it in my ear, then kissed me. Normally I would have been embarrassed, kissing him with everyone around. But tonight I didn’t care. I kissed him back as if we were the only two on the dance floor. The next song was another slow one, so we kept dancing. I looked up to see the sparkly snowflakes and twinkling lights above us. It was magical.

  By 11:45, it was time to leave and I, the girl who hates school dances, was sad to see it end. The night couldn’t have been any better. It wasn’t just the dance that made the night. It was being with Colin.

  As we drove home, I felt like things would eventually be okay again. Like the days ahead didn’t have to be so sad. There was hope and Colin had helped me see that.

  We got to my house at midnight. The lights were on. I knew Dave was waiting up for me.

  “Thanks for tonight, Sam,” Colin said. “I hope you had a good time. I know I did.”

  “Actually, for a high school dance, it wasn’t bad.” I paused, then smiled at him. “Okay, it was fun. Are you happy?”

  “Well, well. Samantha had fun at high school dance. That’s a first. And a last because now you’re a graduate.”

  “No seriously, Colin. The dance was perfect. You were perfect. Thanks for taking me.”

  A light was flashing inside the house. It was Dave’s signal to get inside.

  “I’ve got to go. I don’t want to, but Dave’s overplaying the parent role and it’s driving me crazy.”

  “Okay, okay,” Colin said, noticing the flashing lights. “Have a nice Christmas. I’ll give you your gift when you get back.”

  When he mentioned a gift, I remembered that I had completely forgotten to get him something. “Umm, you’ll have to wait a little for yours. I hate to say this, but I haven’t had a chance to get you anything with all that’s been going on. And there’s no place to shop up at the cabin.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I don’t need anything.”

  The lights from the house flashed again. As I gave Colin one last hug, I knew that it was finally the right time to say it. “I love you, Colin.”

  He held on, not letting me go. “That’s all I needed, Sam. That was my Christmas present.” He gave me a kiss. “I love you, too.”

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  The Cabin

  Dave was waiting at the front door. He glanced at his watch and mumbled something about me being late. I ignored him and ran up the stairs to my room. I didn’t want him to ruin my perfect night.

  The next morning Dave was knocking on my door at 7. “Ughhh, it’s still dark outside,” I groaned. “Why do we have to leave so early?” I shouted, wondering if he could hear me through the blankets that were hiding my head.

  “Get up, Sam. The weather guys are predicting a big winter storm. I want to get on the road before it starts.”

  “Fine. I’m getting up.”

  “I want to be out of here before 8, so hurry.”

  I hadn’t even packed yet but figured Dave didn’t need to know that. I threw some jeans, t-shirts, and a hoodie in a duffle bag. I jumped in the shower and was dressed and ready to go before Dave’s ridiculous deadline.

  The roads were starting to ice up from the light rain that was starting to fall. Not wanting to hear a lecture from Dave about how we should have left even earlier, I put on my noise-canceling headphones and listened to music while Dave listened to Minnesota Public Radio.

  As we drove, I couldn’t stop thinking about my parents. It was Christmas week and I should have been spending it with Mom and Dad. I wanted to be back home, snug in my bed with Mom playing Christmas records on her old turntable downstairs. I wanted to smell cookies baking in the oven, the sweet aroma wafting up to my room. That was what Christmas used to be. And that’s how it should have been. Not driving up to some fishing cabin on a frozen lake in the middle of a winter storm.

  When we finally reached the tiny town that was the only glimmer of civilization near Dave’s cabin, we stopped at a gas station that was attached to a small grocery store.

  “Sam, do you want to pick up anything while we’re here? I brought plenty of food, but if you want to just check inside for anything else you might want, now’s your chance.” Rather than wait for a reply, he got out and started filling the tank.

  It was the first time Dave had spoken since we left the house. He seemed angry at my moodiness. I wondered if he, too, wished he were back home, waiting for Christmas to be over rather than trying to make it into something it could never be again.

  I got out of the car and was met with a mix of sleet and snowflakes. The storm had finally caught up with us. I pulled my hood over my head and ran into the store.

  “Welcome!” an old woman called cheerfully from the counter. “Didn’t think anyone would be out here today, especially on a Sunday in a storm like this.”

  “Yeah, well, we’re staying at one of the cabins nearby.” I walked to the grocery side of the store, hoping the old lady wouldn’t follow.

  No luck. She was clearly looking for company, and I was all she might g
et that day. “Staying out there this time of year?” She shook her head and started walking toward me. “I’ll never understand Minnesota people. Seems like the colder it gets, the more they want to be out in the weather. It’s nuts.”

  As she got closer, I noticed a flickering necklace around her neck. It had little plastic ornaments that blinked on and off. It lay against a bright red Christmas sweater that featured Santa and his reindeer flying in the night sky. The woman’s polyester pants were bright green, and plastic elf earrings dangled from her ears.

  “I’m from Florida, you see. Well, originally. My husband dragged me here in the ’80s and I’ve been freezing ever since. He passed away a couple years ago and left me with this store and well, I just haven’t been able to sell it. It’s the only thing I have left of him, you know?”

  I did know. And I felt bad for brushing the lady off. Like me, she was spending Christmas without the person she loved. Yet she continued on, running his store in a place she never wanted to live, just to keep his memory alive.

  “Well, it’s a very nice store,” I said, even though it really wasn’t that nice a store. It was aimed at local fishermen and boaters, so was stocked with lures, Styrofoam coolers, cases of beer, and grocery basics like milk and loaves of white bread. But the old lady had made it a little more inviting by putting checkered curtains on the windows and festive lights around the displays.

  “Well, enough about me. What’s your story? Is that your dad out there?” She pointed outside. “Oh, where is he now? Must be in the restroom.”

  I looked outside but could barely see. Giant snowflakes were coming down at a rapid pace. Where did Dave go? What was taking him so long?

  “Um, no, that’s my uncle. Well, I call him my uncle. He’s a close friend of the family.”

  She looked at me puzzled. I anticipated her next prying question.

  “My parents passed away.” It was the first time I had said that to someone. It felt strange to say it aloud. And it was really odd saying it to a stranger. But hearing the old lady’s story made me feel like we shared a bond—a membership in a special club of people left behind.