Fallen Princess

by Chantal Fernando

  “Let’s do this,” I tell him, swallowing hard and stretching my neck from side to side. He sits next to me in the back of the van, and when we reach our destination we get out as a unit and stand in our allocated positions. With the signal to move ahead, the two men in front of me kick the door down. I feel safe with Felix at my back and me in the middle. As we enter the premises and take a look around though, that feeling of safety disappears within an instant.

  When I look to the middle of the room, my stomach drops.

  There stands someone I would never have expected to find here. Out of anyone in the world who could be sitting here, of course it has to be her.

  She is sitting there patiently, as if it is perfectly normal to be sitting in an abandoned warehouse that is pretty much empty. It’s as if we’re the ones who have been keeping her waiting. She is dressed in her signature badass, all-black pantsuit, with killer heels to match. Her long hair is pulled up in a high ponytail. If I know anything about my mother, it’s that she always dresses to impress.

  Flanking her on each side is Uncle Tracker and Uncle Rake, standing there in soldier mode. Their faces are wiped of any emotion. I’ve never seen them look as scary as they do now. It’s as if they are entirely different people.

  They don’t see me at first. After we enter the warehouse, my mother looks up and is directing her gaze to the front of the pack. I try to stay focused to not give myself away and stay in formation, but Uncle Tracker sees me first. The only thing that shows he’s noticed me is a quirk of his eyebrows indicating that he’s confused. He did it every time I tried to explain to him how important my eyebrows are.

  When the men in front of me don’t move toward the three of them but wait for my mother’s instructions, I realize that she must be on a job and is also working on bringing this guy down. “Back room,” she says, but at that moment, I see Uncle Tracker whisper something to her. Fuck me.

  As the unit moves to the back, I can’t help but stare at them. I see the surprise, the shock, the anger, but it’s masked quickly, and I know that my mother probably wants to grab me and demand an explanation, but she doesn’t say anything. I have no doubt she’s going to murder me for this later though. No one bother to look for my body, because she knows people. If I’d been honest with her, we could have been working this together, instead of her finding out what I’ve been hiding. But how was I supposed to know the cases she was working on. She’s a lawyer and always has a million things on the go. It’s not like she ever shared things with me before.

  Fucking hell.

  I’ve blindsided her.

  Cons of your mom being a badass.

  Felix whispers, “Clover, focus,” and I realize I’m still on the job. Pushing her out of my mind, I concentrate on the task at hand, moving swiftly as we arrest all three men in the room.

  When we exit with the three men, I don’t look back at my family. How can I? I’ve just ruined the trust between us, and I know that they aren’t going to look at me the same way from now on.

  I don’t think I can look them in the eye right now.

  I’d never call myself a coward, but in this moment all I want to do is run.

  We’re back at the station, and I can’t stop replaying in my head what just happened. Not only did I just break my family’s heart, but none of the men arrested were Reaper. Apparently he had gotten out of there, almost as if someone had given him a heads-up that we had found his location.

  “Who was that woman in there?” I ask the guy who was leading the team.

  “She was the informant,” he explains to me. “She’s FBI. I wouldn’t fuck with her if I were you. She’s known for chewing people up and spitting them out.”

  Don’t I know it.

  I’d turned off my phone, delaying the inevitable, but I know I’m going to have to face the music the second I’m away from here. I’m bracing myself for it when Felix says, “You did well.” He studies me, then lifts my chin with his fingers. “Do you need to go for another swim?”

  I force a small smile. “I don’t think anything can save me from this.”

  He nods toward the exit. “Come on. I’ll buy you a pizza.”

  I follow him, but my mind is elsewhere. When we pull up to what I assume is his house, I arch my brow at him. “Bringing me into your domain?”

  “It’s about time, don’t you think?” he murmurs, getting out of the car and opening my door for me before I can move. He’s opening up and letting me in, and he has no idea who I really am. I’m already going to be in so much shit for lying to my family, I don’t need to lie to Felix too.

  His place looks brand-new, modern and spacious. He obviously likes black, leather, and isn’t a fan of clutter. He’s also either a clean freak or has a cleaner, because the place is so tidy I could eat off the floors.

  “Can I get you something to drink?” he asks, opening the fridge and scanning the contents. “I’ll order some pizza and dessert.”

  “A beer would be nice if you have one,” I tell him, picking up a photo of him and what must be his mom. “She’s beautiful.”

  “She is. It’s been just me and her since Dad died, but we’ve always been close. She’s a nurse, so she works a lot, just like me.”

  He hands me an ice-cold beer, but for himself opens a juice box.

  My brows lift.

  “What? The juice tastes better when it comes in a box, don’t even try to deny it,” he states with a straight face.

  “Are you being serious or is that a dirty joke?” I ask, bursting into laughter.

  “I wouldn’t make such a crude joke in front of a lady,” he says, but the mischievous look on his face says otherwise. He runs his thumb along my lower lip. “You amaze me.”

  Lifting me up onto the counter, he kisses me, cutting off my laughter with his mouth. The kiss deepens, and as my fingers tangle in his hair and his go exploring, I can tell that we aren’t messing around this time. Wrapping my legs around him, he carries me upstairs to his bedroom. I’m too distracted to look around, especially when he lays me on the bed and starts kissing me until I don’t even know what day it is or where I am. I reach up to help him remove his shirt, then run my fingers down his chest and abs, all while he looks down at me with eyes filled with such heat, and I know that mine mirror his.

  “You smell so good,” I whisper as I lean forward and press a kiss against his skin. When you’ve stayed a virgin for this long, there’s a lot of pressure on making it a perfect moment.

  But for me, it isn’t the moment, it’s the person.

  “So do you,” he replies, arms at my shoulders, holding his bodyweight off me. “I feel really fucking lucky right now.”

  “Well, you’re about to get luckier,” I tell him, trying to push him off me and roll on top of him, but he overpowers me with a smirk, takes my wrists, and holds them above my head.

  “Think you’re stronger than me, do you?” he teases, kissing my neck slowly, taking his time to seduce me. Little does he know all I want to do is touch him, feel him, and just lose myself in him.

  He lets go of my wrists, and this time lets me flip him onto his back, so I can straddle him. Slowly removing my top, I let him have his fill before my black bra comes off next. When he reaches for me I bat his hands away and give him a little show, arching my back and playing with my breasts, running my fingers over my nipples. I can feel how hard he is beneath me, and it makes me feel powerful. He wants me just as much as I want him. I might not have much experience, but I do what feels natural. I lean down and kiss him, until I can feel myself getting wet. He takes control then, rolling me onto my back and looking me in the eye.

  “Are you sure?” he asks, studying me. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. I’m not in any rush, Clo. It’s all up to you.”

  “I know,” I reply, flashing my teeth. “And I want you. I’ve waited long enough, Felix.”

  He removes the rest of my clothing first, followed by his own, and then lays back on top of me,
making sure not to put all his weight on me.

  “If you’re sure,” he whispers, a devilish glint in his eyes before he starts to kiss down my body, taking his time kissing and sucking on my neck, then my collarbone. By the time he reaches my breasts, my eyes are basically rolling into the back of my head, and my mouth has fallen open in pleasure. I stay still, lost in the moment, in him. Everything feels so right, and instead of being nervous, I’m excited and exhilarated and I want this to last forever. He gently sucks on my nipples, my toes curling and my spine slightly arching.

  And then his mouth is on my pussy, and I see stars.

  He makes me come, once, before putting on a condom and sliding inside of me, ever so slowly, too much so, so I lift my hips upward, greedy for more of him. He makes it as painless for me as possible, which is kind of a feat considering the size of him.

  And just like that, I’m his and he’s mine, and there’s no going back.

  I wouldn’t want to.

  “Fuck, you feel so good, Clover,” he whispers against my lips. “Are you okay?”

  I nod. “You feel so good too. Don’t stop, Felix.”

  Then he starts to move, and I can’t control the sounds that leave my mouth.

  He’s perfect with me.

  Patient, gentle, observant.

  “I don’t want to hurt you,” he says, and I can see he’s restraining himself by the tightness in his jaw.

  “You’re not,” I tell him. “I’m not going to break. Show me what I’ve been missing out on.”

  He starts to move a little faster. I bring his lips down to mine, wanting to be connected to him in every way possible. He feels so good, and yeah there’s a little bit of pain, but in a good way.

  I like it.

  And thank fuck he knows what he’s doing.

  Taking a note from him, I let my body follow its natural rhythm, raising my hips to him, scoring my nails down his back, as he buries his face in my neck, sucking and kissing.

  He makes me come a second time before he does. While I’ve made myself orgasm before, someone else doing it is a totally different experience.

  It’s so much fucking better.

  Brushing my hair off my face, he kisses me so sweetly, smiling down at me. “You are so beautiful right now. I wish you could see yourself through my eyes.”

  “I don’t think I want to see my orgasm face,” I tease, cupping his face with my palms and sitting up a little, pressing a kiss onto his cheeks, then his lips, just adoring him.

  “Your orgasm face is hot,” he says. “But I might need to see it again a few times, just to make sure.”

  “Not tonight, you won’t,” I reply, wrinkling my nose.

  He laughs and shakes his head. “No, not tonight. Or for the next few days, you’re probably going to be sore.”

  “Yeah, because you’re huge. Have you seen you?”

  “Thank you,” he says, shoulders shaking as he starts to laugh.

  “You’re still inside of me, can you not move so much,” I say, laughing with him. “You’re incorrigible, seriously.”

  He gently slides out and lies down next to me, pulling me closer to him so I’m basically half on him. He’s right, I do feel a little sore, but nothing too much to handle. It’s a weird feeling, knowing that he’s been inside of me, and the first one to do so.

  “Come on, let me clean you up,” he murmurs, trying to get off the bed, but I hold on to him. “I can run you a bath, if you want? Tell me whatever you need.”

  “In a minute, I just want to lie here for a little more,” I say, resting my head on his chest.

  “Anything for you,” he says, kissing the top of my head.

  I close my eyes, and smile.

  I fucking love this.

  And I know I’m never going to forget this moment.

  And then I remember the rest of what happened today, and the world comes crashing once more.

  “There’s something I need to tell you,” I say as we lie in bed, wrapped in each other’s arms. I’m about to ruin my very first post-orgasm haze, but I know that I have to tell him now. I’m in deep with him, and if he doesn’t want to be with me after this, I need to accept that. I’d rather know now than before I fall for him even further.

  “What is it?” he asks gently.

  When I hesitate, he adds, “You know you can trust me, Clo.”

  “I haven’t been completely honest with you,” I blurt out, rolling closer to him and looking him in the eye. “I’ve been pretty much lying to everyone.”

  “About what?” he asks me, brow furrowing.

  I wonder how the hell I’m going to explain this one.

  “Pass me your phone,” I tell him, taking it and opening up the internet. I type in Faye Black and Dex Black and hand it back to him. I don’t bother to search my own name, because I know my mom worked hard to make sure there is no trace of me online, other than my social media. “These are my parents.”

  He scrolls down, reading the information. “This is the informant,” he whispers, reading a little more before looking up at me. “Faye Black. Everyone knows who Faye Black is.” His expression is blank, not giving anything away, but I don’t miss the flash of hurt and anger in his eyes as he sits up. “Your family are all bikers, and Wind Dragons at that. I’ve heard about them. I don’t really know what to say right now.”

  “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you—”

  “You know how I feel about bikers after what happened with my dad,” he interrupts, jaw clenching. “I opened up to you, Clover, and told you all about my past, and you didn’t think that was the opportunity to tell me about yours?”

  I don’t know whether he has consciously or subconsciously moved away from me, but I feel the distance between us now that he’s at the end of the bed. I sit up, determined to make him understand the situation I was in.

  “How could I tell you after you told me how you felt about bikers and what they did to your father? I knew you’d just lump me into the same category as them, even though we had nothing to do with what happened.”

  “And how do you know that?” he asks, scrubbing his hand down his face. “You lied, Clover. And you kept lying. How am I supposed to trust you?”

  “Felix—”

  “I know it’s not something that you’d just go around and tell people,” he says, cutting me off. “But I wasn’t just people, Clover. I’m your person. There’s a difference. I don’t know why you felt like you couldn’t trust me with this.”

  “I was going to tell you but then you told me about your dad, and—”

  “And you thought I’d blame you for something you had nothing to do with?” he asks, brow furrowing. “Come on, Clover, give me a little more credit. You aren’t who your family is. You said that they didn’t want you to do this, but you went against them because you know that this is who you are meant to be. You aren’t some criminal pretending to be a cop. You are a cop, and you’re a good one; it doesn’t change anything. I just wish you’d told me the truth, especially when I told you I wanted to know everything about you, the good, the bad, and the ugly.”

  “And which one is this?” I ask him, now losing my temper a little. He’s acting like I’m not my family, when he’s wrong, I’m exactly like them, but I’m not ashamed of that. In fact, that’s something to be proud of. “The bad or the ugly? I’m not embarrassed of where I came from or who I am, Felix; I just had to hide that because of the career I wanted. Because people would judge me and treat me like a criminal, instead of someone wanting to help. I am who I am today because of my family. It’s why I’m stronger, why I’m a fighter, and why I could take on anyone else in the academy and win. I’m not the sheep, Felix, I’m the fucking wolf, and I’m sick of people acting like I’m not like the Wind Dragons, because I am.” I take a deep breath before continuing. “Yes, I lied to my family about becoming a cop. I didn’t want to let them down, and I didn’t want all the drama that I knew was going to come with it, but I shouldn’t have done that. I shou
ld have been smarter, and more honest. With you and with them. I see that now.”

  “How did they even let you into the academy?” he asks, pinching the bridge of his nose. “It makes no sense that they’d just let you in, with a family so powerful and with a criminal background.”

  I pause when he says that. Why didn’t I ever think of that? I was too excited to be admitted, it never occurred to me.

  “I guess I flew under the radar,” I say, my voice not sounding as confident as I’d hoped.

  “Fuck, Clover, I knew you had something about you. You’re a fighter, a survivor, and that’s why you’re so perfect for this job.”

  “I know.” I duck my head. “And, Felix, I’m so sorry I didn’t open up and tell you all of this earlier, because I know that I should have. I was just pretending everything was fine when it’s not. And for me, it probably never will be.”

  “I wish you had,” he admits, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t know, Clover, what else have you been keeping from me?”

  “Nothing,” I promise him. “Everything else between us has been real. I just didn’t tell you much about my family and where I came from.”

  “And who you are,” he adds, throwing my words back at me. “You didn’t share with me who you really are, and that means something, to me at least.”

  “And what would you have done if I’d told you?” I ask, lifting my chin. “You would have looked at me differently, the way you’re looking at me right now.”

  I know that, to an extent, lying about who my family is, who I am, is necessary, but I never should have lied to him. I stand up and look down at him, smiling sadly. “I’m sorry, Felix. I really am. I don’t know what else I can say.”

  I swallow hard, then look toward the door.

  I told him everything I needed to, and I guess I’ll just have to give him some time to process that.